1001 Albums Summary

I really hate this fucking album. Jesus Christ, Mary and Joseph I hate this album. Might I enumerate those ways in which thine sweet serenade doth fuckin piss me off? Listen close. First off, the singer has no soul. Like this nigga sounds like he isn't allowed to reveal that he's trapped in this band as a cosmic punishment for some heinous crime. Garbarge. that's one. Second off, this shit is literally - and I mean actually literally - not even partially artistic. Every song is boring. Every song is 100% predictable. Every song sounds like it was fabricated for the collective wet-dream of of the characters in that 70's show. wtf? This is fucking crazy. Bland as fuck, its like feeding my ears straight white rice cooked in distilled water. There's literally nothing here. And if you wanna get into the weeds, we can talk about specifics - incessant 4/4 shit-drumming; solos that sound 100% lackluster due to an unbelievable lack of tension, plus guitar solos that actually mimic real sounds in the world that are boring (the clock solo at the end is the ultimate example of this); The horribly awkward talking in the middle of most of the music: the 'i need some love' part was so bad it actually made a permanent change on my mood; How about that bass player? Talk about bullshit! He'snot doing anything. Take his ass out and replace him with a machine why don't you? And they shouted out that shitty drummer one too many times. That's two things. Now lets talk about the album as a whole. First off its live. Why? its worse this way. They are not exciting. They are not fun. They are not inspiring live. Their lyrics are harder to hear, which for me is a plus, but can’t be a plus for the crowd of 'women' - aka dads in drag or daughters who went to this concert to honor their dads or women who were looking for a hookup and 500 bucks and cocaine backstage. I genuinely can't believe that any of the women I heard in this crowd were there of their own free will, even if they think they were. I won't believe it, it'd be an insult to women. Classic Rock Dad, sure he's there. But wtf? In fact I'd like to see a phenomenological investigation of the aesthetic judgement of these women. The music was the equivalent of a 15 year old highschool mini-himbo (has-slept-with-4-young-women-and-thinks-hes-on-top-of-the-fucking-world-because-he-buys-ditch-weed-and-cries-to-cheap-trick-in-his-basement-while-his-single-mom-is-taking-out-the-trash-alone-...-again). That means it was also a work in neu-virility - you know? The whole 'Oh baby I need you so much and all my vulberable emotions are actually just expressed through my need to have a slam piece near me who doesn't hate my music' type shit. For women, its insidious self hate. For men, its right on the god damn mark. Either way, its lame af. That's three. Lyrically its about as mature as 5glo 10 years ago and sounds just as young on the ears. How can anyone justify basically talking about nothing interesting? Isn't tgis part of the rock corpus that old white guys point to to say music now is dying? How did these lyrics pre-empt the awkward, wan, inconsequentiality of modern lyricism, except without the very obvious cultural impetus for such a switch. Only song I had heard before was Surrender and they even made my hate that in this listen. Its actually almost artistic how trite the lyrics are. Sadly, they are clearly artless. 1/5, but really more like .9/10, the requiste score for 'music' in the broad sense. Harumph

Holy fuck. i had been avoiding this album much to my detriment. its one of the best albums I've ever heard. its also likely going to be a favorite. also sorry, my wifi had been out all week but I'm back and I'm finna go through these albums