*sigh* Okay. Yeah, this all just sounds like parody to me at this point. It's earnest to the point of being silly. There's obviously craft involved here, and Karen Carpenter has a lovely voice, but the overall effect is just emphatically not for me. Like listening to the fever dream of someone in a diabetic coma.

I get it, but it's not for me. I think I'd rather just read a collection of short stories about these characters than listen to this. Also, does anyone actually ENJOY listening to a harmonica? At no point do I ever want to hear loud, atonal blatting just farting over the entire song. It's just unpleasant.

Oh, this is ambient background music for hipster coffee shops. I feel like I missed a lot of 00s indie as it was happening, but going back much of it feels flat and rather lifeless. This is no exception, so I guess I didn't miss much.

OK, I get it. Dad rock bad, 80s pop shallow. This is clearly not an album for Serious Music Appreciators. Which is great, because then I can crank Panama the fuck up and chase all the dreary, try-hard, tedious wankers away and enjoy myself. Because that's the thing some people seem to forget: joy and exuberance are human experiences that are worthy of celebrating. And duh, this particular brand of dude rock need not appeal to everyone. But you know, sometimes you end up in a class with a very attractive instructor and words fail you. Well, Van Halen's got you. Just raise your hand and yell "I brought my pencil!" And that'll probably work out great. Also, Eddie is a wizard and Dave is a genial doofus. So relax, enjoy life a little. Just reach down, between your legs... and ease the seat back.

An interesting album, in that I don't ever actually need to hear any of the big hits off of it, really. They rather saturated both MTV back in the day, and classic rock radio ever after. But they're enduring for a reason, just excellent 80s pop rock. I'm not mad when they come on, you know? The album cuts are... there, I guess. "Thug" is trying to do something. What that is, exactly, I'm not sure, but the bass is wilding out and that's kinda fun. Generally speaking, the 80s were pretty rough for the big, influential acts of the 60s and 70s. I mean, look no further than Jefferson Starship to illustrate the point. With this record, ZZ Top fared a little better than, say, Steve Miller. You can still hear that lil ol band out of Texas under all the glitzy sheen of 80s production, at least. And good for that one lady in "Legs." I assume that's a feel good story of triumph over the adversity of being unable to walk, but now she has legs and knows how to use them?

I would have enjoyed this quite a bit more if it were a tighter experience. Not only is the album too long, but pretty much every song is roughly two minutes overlong. That said, this is a heavy vibes record, so if you're not feeling it the album will seem interminable. That said Bittersweet Symphony holds up, even if I never really need to hear it again. If I could give half stars, I would, but alas.

Ooh, my first 5 star! The funny thing is, there isn't much left to say about it. The skits are a terrible waste of time, they've always been pointless. For some reason, it was the style at the time. But the juvenile dipshittery can be overlooked because of the sheer talent on display. The weaker tracks are only weak because they exist next to things like Gimmie the Loot and motherfucking Juicy, you know? It's a classic for a reason. Fuck Puffy for real, though.

I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it's, you know, fine. It's not quite passive, ambient background music, but it's close. Frank Ocean is an artist I've heard a lot about, but never really sought out. I can see how this is a new direction for R&B, which I appreciate, however it's missing something. Soul? Simmering rage beneath the funk? This album feels very smooth, like there's not much being said. The only time I started to get really into a track - Pyramids - it turns out the thing is 10 damn minutes long and thus loses some steam. That said, I don't hate it. Just didn't register much. Sure do with I could rate half stars, because this is a straight 2.5 - but, it gets the benefit of rounding up.

Well, it's certainly no Skylarking, but by no means is it terrible. This is one of those records where my initial reaction is: "it's interesting!" And then after some reflection: "it's interesting!" Nothing really reached out to grab me, but I was relatively engaged throughout. I get the sense it would reward relistening, but there's not quite enough gravity to pull me back in. Oh, and that dictionary song is bad. Like bad bad. Like I worry about people who think it's good bad.

Oh man, the energy radiating off this thing. Definitely the cocaine to The Velvet Underground's heroin (although who are we kidding, it's clearly an all of the drugs situation). I was a little surprised at the 7+ minute long freakouts, which I could probably do without, but the proto-punk attitude carries the entire record. I doubt I would listen straight through again, but Down On The Street is a banger and I'm glad I checked this out. Good to know the roots of one of my favorite genres. 3.5 rounded up.

Early albums like this can be difficult to rate. The way things worked were just so different then, right? Anyway, as a collection of songs, this is fine. But as a talent? As influence? R-E-S-P-E-C-T. You get it. Anyway, 5/5 as a milestone, but imma give it a three.

On the one hand, this is the weakest of Stevie's legendary 70s run of albums. So, you know, there's only like two certified all-timers on here. This record is a bit slower, and the vibe is definitely a bit heavier. Also, You Haven't Done Nothin' still being as relevant as ever is quite the disappointment.

I've always wanted to like prog rock more than I do. And while I do enjoy Rush, it's mostly classic rock radio nostalgia. I never had a full on Rush phase... probably because I'm too impatient to really immerse myself fully in a prog rock concept album. A personal failing, I'm sure.

Early albums are weird and difficult to rate. This has some classic, formative songs on it. "Oh Boy," "That'll be the Day," stuff like that. Sonic wallpaper for those of us over 35. I'll probably never go out of my way to hear these songs again, but I won't mind if they're on somewhere. 2.5 rounded up.

Ah, the super random album selection today is... huh. Well good call because any Ozzy is good Ozzy, and I've actually never listened to this one! Which is a shame cuz it fucking rules. I don't have much to add to the billions of words being written about the legend, suffice to say the legend is accurate. RIP to a metal god.

Cut the overall time on this by a third and it would be so much better. Not every song has to be over 4 minutes! Still, better than I expected considering I had never heard of these guys. I assume their inclusion boils down to "semi-popular, from Northern Ireland." Not exactly essential, though. Still, cool stuff.

Look, I was like 9 or 10 the first time I listened to this album, on cassette tape, as one did in the late 80s, and it was transformative. I don't know what to tell you, but there's no objectivity with this. Paradise City hit my impressionable brain and never left. Even now, I dunno, there's something urgent and pressing about this record. It's gross and grimy, and real in a way their peers were not. And yeah, obviously Axl is Axl, with all that entails. But the band rips, the first half of Rocket Queen just SOUNDS like LA felt in the late 80s, and it's still one of the all time great debut albums of all time.

All timer. Incisive writing, impeccable flow. The production is a bit murky, but it also just feels one with the time and place. The atmosphere and vibe of this record are second to none. It's one of those classic debuts that the artist spends their entire career chasing, and never quite catch. Which, considering the success and accolades Nas has achieved over the years is saying something. Even with my distinct West Coast bias, this is still a great album.

This is a landmark; it is a super important album stuffed with incredible songs... that I'm not sure resonate with me much anymore. Which is wild, but the truth. Great, innovative work all around, but I never need to hear Iron Man again. Still, legendary stuff. RIP Ozzy, the world will never see another like you.

Jazz... but funky. Which makes it a better jazz. I wish I enjoyed jazz more, but generally when I hear it all I hear any more is Andy Samburg in Brooklyn 99: skiddley be bop, jazz! This at least I can put on and find bits I enjoy. The first track in particular is fun, and as people have pointed out, I bet this really shines live. 2.5 rounded up.

And here I thought Madness was a ska band. I was expecting peak British 2 Tone 2nd wave ska and get... well whatever is happening here. It's not terrible? Kinda goofy in parts, dabbling in New Wave for sure. Also, that motherfucker is for sure in brown face sitting in front of a cobra or some shit. The 80s were wild, holy shit. Anyway, 2.4 rounded down. And mostly because Our House is a bop.

It's Prince. It's like spring weather in England. If you don't like it, wait five minutes. This isn't my favorite Prince album, but it's still worth a listen. It's mildly dated, but what the hell, it's still Prince. I don't have a great deal to add, not a lot stood out, songwise. A perfectly cromulant time.

So, I am by no means an electronic music conisseuer. Not a hater, just generally not for me with some exceptions. I'm definitely familiar with the hits off this record, because monoculture, but I was never spurred to dig any deeper. To my surprise, I enjoyed this! I absolutely need to be in a particular mood for it, but despite the repetitive nature of this album, it's good. Plus it ends with a sick L7 cover, which I did not expect.

This one starts strong but kind of peters out and then ends with an extended... audio collage? Common is an upper echelon rapper, there's some pretty great pre-psycho Kanye production, but it just doesn't carry the momentum for me. I end up wanting to like it more than I do.

Okay, yeah - I just don't understand folk/singer-songwriters as a genre. I didn't enjoy listening to this, and I likely won't listen to it again, just emphatically not for me. That said, I see the appeal for certain tastes, and she's and important artist in her own right. Plus, she's roughly 100x more listenable than Bob Dylan, so she's got that going for her.

I get it, it's bland, mellow to the point of catatonia, arguably even dull. Steely Dan is for the technicians. For people who play instruments like an engineer. And you know, good for them, I guess. Personally, I like music based in emotion expressed a little more spontaneously. I'm impressed with the technical wizards and all, but I gotta have a little feeling in there to get properly invested. That said! Some of these songs are great - true mellow classics to kinda vibe out too. The rest are the definition of inoffensive.

I knew my annual attempt at trying to understand the appeal of Radiohead was coming up! Turns out... I still don't get it. I listen to so much music! So many genres and eras! I try every so often to figure this out because they are so damned revered but I just do. Not. Get. It. There's like on medium tempo song on this thing and the rest of the tracks just feel like they're drowning. And Thom Yorke sings like he's half heartedly trying to haunt me and failing. It's warbly ghost music and I can't make myself care about it.

Another album I ended up liking more than I thought I would. Thanks again, Classic Rock Radio! I don't have a ton to add here. It's light rock with a slight edge to it - enough to spur Lynard Skynard to respond with a diss track. For the record, I believe this is the first time I've listened to "Alabama." Where's the lie, Skynard? Anyway, I've had "Heart of Gold" stuck in my head all day.

My West Coast shows whenever I talk about hip hop, I think, because Wu Tang has never quite really hit for me the way I want it to. Like this is fine. Knuckleheadz is a cool song. I don't ever really need to hear a full minute of... "dialogue" before every track, though, and the production on this record is murky as shit. The actual rapping is generally solid, at least, but sometimes it feels like you have to do sonic archeology to uncover the actual bars. Still waiting for a proper West Coast classic to pop up though, because this NYC shit is, you know, not as good.

This is one of those artists that probably only really, truly hit if you were there and receptive to the vibe. I can listen to this for the first time now and hear them in dozens of bands I love, but the raw material is just that, raw. It's cool, but as more of a historical curiosity for me.

Is the inclusion of this album simply "isn't it weird this came out at the same time as a much better album by a more famous band?" It's fine for what it is, but what it is isn't particularly noteworthy.

Better than expected, but I didn't expect much. This is one of those albums that starts with a certified classic and then never comes close to reaching that high again, so the entire record feels like an anticlimax. The meandering 10 minute long closing track doesn't help.

Ah, my first DNF of this project. Look, I'm doing my best over here. I'm pushing against my comfort zones, I'm trying to keep an open mind, trying new things. But my patience for extended pretentious wankery is limited. Obviously there is talent here, but these are ambient soundscapes more than actual songs, and I cannot make myself care. Miserable.

Jazz. Jazzety jazzy jim jam jazz. Yeah. I, uh, do not understand jazz. I've tried. Many times. Jazzamatazz. Jeepy joopy jazz. Jazz.

Now, I won't say my expectations were high going into this, other than I expected some serious bongo action. Well, bongos delivered. But also, this is really fun?? A whole hour is a bit much, but the first 5 or 6 tracks go way harder than they have any right to. It helps that there are songs I love that obviously sample from this. The Roots, Beastie Boys, etc. A very cool surprise.

Courtney Love is criminally underrated as a songwriter and musician, for reasons that probably have nothing to do with a loud, cantankerous woman who happened to married to one of the biggest rock stars in the world. Unfortunately, Hole was not exactly prolific - that would be the cantankerous bit - but those albums had crazy range on them. This one is quite good! It's a move towards power pop, and light years away from Pretty On The Inside - hilariously so. That said, it falls short of the heights of Live Through This. It just doesn't hit quite as hard as that record. Still, there are some phenomenal tracks here. The title track, of course, Reasons to be Beautiful, and Playing Your Song all stand out. It's good!

Blonde rules. The two big songs off this album still hit, forty... I don't want to talk about it years later. But the rest of the album is also great. It's like one of the big supernova hits are on each side, and the rest of the tracks orbit them. But it works, they're complimentary and not filler. I could easily see superfans finding favorites on this album that aren't the two hits, which to me is a hallmark of an excellent album. Also, Debbie Harry is a national treasure.

Uh oh, another DNF. And I generally like Beck! But I am not a fan of mopey breakup albums. I'm just not at that point in my life anymore. And honestly? Even when I was I still wanted to hear angry-sad as opposed to sad-sad. After six maudlin ass boohoo songs I was done. They're really well produced and the composition is tight - strangely so for a Beck record! - but they're all slow weepies and that's definitely mood-dependant music. If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son....

Confessions of a teenage try-hard: I wore a shirt with this cover on it all the time. I did not own this record. Sonic Youth was just a band I was trying very hard to like, because they were cooool. To be fair, I did have a couple other CDs of theirs, but the art on this one was just, you know, cooool. The point, I guess, is that Sonic Youth is very mich an acquired taste. Getting into them felt like work. But hey, now I like them so I guess it paid off? Anyway, I eventually taped this off somebody, because the 90s. My opinion of Goo hasn't really changed since then. Not as good as Daydream Nation (not much is), not as good as Dirty, but probably better than the rest of their discography. It's like they figured out how to insert music into the noise. Somewhat. Look, your mileage is going to vary. Did you spend your formative years acquiring a taste for noisy music? You'll have a good time. I wish I still had that shirt, though.

I remember buying this in high school - because 'Sabotage,' obviously, and being utterly baffled. And disappointed, honestly. It was just... way weirder than I expected. Especially since Paul's Boutique was (and remains) such a classic. This is way more eclectic and experimental, and as such not all of it works. Particularly when you're like 15 and want everything to hit as hard as the single. This is the first time I've listened to this in full in probably 25 years or so. Funnily enough, I have a similar take to teenage me. Basically, this moves Into sound collage mode after the Q-Tip feature, which is the last stand out track to me. That's a shame, because I like the interstitial instrumentals breaking up the proper tracks in the beginning, but the later songs just don't hit like Root Down or Sabotage. If this were an EP, easy 5 stars. Since it's an hour long... eh. At least all the good stuff is front loaded.

I like that half the reviews for this are shocked that music from 1989 sounds like music from 1989. Like yo, of course. Listening to 80s hip hop is like listening to rock from the 50s, they were figuring things out. Black Reign is a clear improvement in both flow and production, but this album, by a 19 year old woman MC is still important. For what I would think are obvious reasons. Is it something I'm going to put on regularly? Probably not! But I'm not regularly listening to Little Richard these days either. That doesn't undermine the achievement. She's the Queen, and it's a shame she doesn't rap much any more.

Cool ass post punk for the goth kids. I was not huge into this scene back in the day, which is too bad, honestly. It's great. Halloween is the classic song, a song that sounds like what it's about. Anxious, spooky. Obviously this album works best when you're feeling a certain kind of way, but overall this is fantastic.

Ugh, reggae. I don't care about it and you can't make me. I get the history and importance and all that, but the music itself is just so repetitive and dull I cannot bring myself to care. I never need to hear the singles again. The other songs are basically interchangeable. The one standout song - Exodus - is only good because it's more funk than reggae. Which saves it from a one star, but otherwise meh.

On the one hand, I enjoy pop music and am glad the genre is included on this list. On the other hand, meh. Never a big Justin Timberlake fan. The album is too long, but the real sin is that it's boring. Same rhythms and same sentiments repetated for an hour. There's two standout tracks, and you've probably heard those a million times if you were alive in 2002. As I was not a teen girl then, very little about this resonates. My nostalgia is untriggered. Brittney was better, and it's not close.

This is a DNF - I got the gist of it pretty quickly. It's what the edgy kids were into in the late 70s and early 80s. If I had known about this band in high school, I probably would have been into it too. Listening to it just sounds like a manky semi-finished basement or garage bedroom with incense covering up the mediocre pot smoke smell. Maybe there are some interesting ideas here but listening to it is a chore and the dude sounds like a prick. I'm good.

Well, it beats old fashioned sounds in country and western music. Although calling big band jump swing modern is pretty funny, even in 1962. Anyway, Ray Charles is a legend, the concept of this album is incredible and subversive (for the time), and I have no real desire to ever listen to it again (complimentary).

I like The Police, but in the 20 or so years since I bought this particular album, I think I've come to accept that I mostly just like the hits. I remember picking this up in like 2001 or something because they kept playing Synchronicity II in the store I worked at, and I was always excited to hear it. I still love that song. But then I got it home and just... it's fine. Every Breath You Take is clearly the biggest song here, and I'm pretty well over that one. King of Pain is good, Murder by Numbers is fun, but the rest of the album cuts don't do much for me.