Certified Banger. Everyone knows this album rips I am not going to waste time restating the obvious.
A pleasant surprise. I had always assumed Costello's music was boring critic bait, but his modern(for the time) interpretation of the 50's style is actually quite enjoyable. I was particularly impressed by the punchy and clever lyricism.
I wanted to hate this corny ass 80's hair metal album so badly, but I can't deny that parts of it scratched an itch in my lizard brain in a way that made me think less of myself. I still believe David Lee Roth should be chemically castrated as a public safety measure.
It is impossible to love or hate the Foo Fighters as they are the platonic ideal of mid. They are of room temperature water. They are spaghetti without sauce. They are envoys of the endless void of nothingness that awaits us all.
I don't know if this even a top 3 David Bowie album, so the fact that it is still a 4/5 is really a credit to him.
If Dusty (or anyone involved in the album) had actually written these songs, they would be impressive. However, in reality this is just a mediocre cover album.
Dadcore. I use to despise Steely Dan, now I kinda like them. I assume that when the baby arrives they will become my favorite band. It is life's natural progression.
Tres estrellas
I am not sure if this album is super innovative or if I am too white to realize it isn't.
Sort of sounds like a super 80's version of the Grateful Dead, or an AI generated talking heads album. On one hand, there were a few really cool moments. On the other, I was waiting for it to end after about 3 tracks. I can see my option on this album changing a lot (in either direction) upon multiple play throughs.
If every song on this album was cut in half it would still be too long.
Because Black Sabbath essentially invented heavy metal on this album, I feel extremely guilty for not giving it five stars, but the end of the day I think it is more important than it is good. This album will rightfully be remembered forever, but Sabbath's subsequent albums are far more refined and enjoyable.
I considered giving this a second star because I thought the instrumentals were actually quite good, but holy fuck did those vocals suck shit. I am pretty sure Scott Stapp would tell this dude to tone it down. To make matters worse, unlike other corny 90s vocal performances of this ilk, every dogshit lyric is delivered with excruciating clarity, subjecting the listener to verse after verse of try-hard garbage that I assume was specifically crafted with the intention of attracting underage girls.
I am giving this album the benefit of the doubt because I am way out of my element here and it had some cool moments, but this is dangerously close to jazz.
The first side of this album is good faith, if somewhat naive, attempt by the Drive by Truckers to reconcile their love of their home, with its horrific past (the duality of the southern thing). In contrast to the willful ignorance of bands like Lynyrd Skynyrd, they acknowledged and explicitly grapple with the racist history of the south. They paint a picture of the average white southerner as a fundamentally decent person, and lay the blame for racist atrocities solely at the feet of opportunistic politicians such as George Wallace, while decrying northern judgement of southerners as a product of classism. While there is some truth to the later notion, their central argument is undone by the fact that the same so called "decent people" they earlier described voted Wallace into office. Still, by even attempting to grapple with this issues in a nuanced manner the Drive by Truckers prove more thoughtful than pretty much all of their southern rock contemporaries.
Lyrically the first half of the album is a bit of a roller coaster, fluctuating between moments genuine insight and sheer stupidity. Sonically it is fairy straight down the middle southern rock performed competently although not exceptionally.
The second half of the album didn’t need to exist. While the first half of the album often missed the mark, it was a genuine and passionate attempt at a creative endeavor. The second half felt like a repository of half baked ideas that weren’t good enough to make the a side.
"to the fucking rich man, all poor people look the same".
“When I was a young boy I sniffed a lot of glue”
A masterpiece of songwriting and musicianship featuring two of the greatest songs ever in "Tonight, Tonight" and "Bullet with Butterfly Wings", as well as several more excellent tracks that would be the crown jewel of any other album including "Zero" "Galapogos" and "1979". Furthermore, these standout moments are woven together by songs like the title track and "Jellybelly", that may not be earworm singles themselves, but are still well crafted songs that perfectly match the tenor of the album giving it the feel of a cohesive work. The guitarwork in this album is masterful and manages to stand out while still serving the song. The other instrumentals consistent enough in style to stay on theme, but creative enough to keep the listener engaged. I know that the biggest criticism of this album is that it is bloated, and while I think it could have been cut down a little, I rarely felt like I was listening to filler. With the exception of a one or two of the songs near the end of the album, each track is unique, but still feels like it belongs. Yes, Corgan is a pretentious weirdo now, but if I wrote the riff from "Zero" I would be the most insufferable asshole on planet earth. Yes, the lyrics are super corny, but they earn the corniness with the instrumentals. Nitpick all you want, it is still a 5/5.
A well made album that didn’t really move me.
More like astral years amiright? I have long thought that Van Morrison had a voice so beautiful that he could read a phone book and make it sound decent. On this album he decided to test that premise. Honestly, I think a theme of Van Morrison's career is his use of angelic vocals to hide uninspired songwriting.
This album is infinitely more enjoyable if you imagine it being played by a family of animatronic bears. The instrumentals are strangely satisfying, but I recommend not thinking too hard about the lyrics as they will hurt your brain.
What lovers don't want to swing every now and then? This album is a curious pick because I don't think it contains Sinatra's best material. However, his consistent style and vocal delivery give all Sinatra's albums a 3 star floor and a 4 star ceiling. Also, there is a song on here called "Makin Whoopee" which is objectively hilarious.
This is what I assume Essentially Simon sounds like. In an effort to maintain my sanity, I spent most of this album coming up with derogatory nicknames for British rappers. These are my favorites:
50 Pence
Lil Waynker
Kid Crumpet
Steal the Jewels
Tea Pain
Albums like this are why this list exists. I had never heard of this album or band before today, and I was completely blown away. It is a completely unique yet highly enjoyable listen which is the most difficult feat in music.
I have never cared for the police. I don't like their boring white boy reggae sound. I don't like their 80's douchebag aesthetic. I don't like that Sting's primary claim to fame is taking too long to fuck. That being said, even I can't deny the moments of musical brilliance on this album. Sure there were a few tracks that reaffirmed my pre-existing biases against the group ("Walking in Your Footsteps", "Tea in the Sahara", and "Mother"), but they were outnumbered by beautifully crafted songs like the "Synchronicity 1 &2", "Wrapped Around Your Finger", and "King of Pain". I hate to give props to a band who's most famous member is a bassist with a stupid nickname who refuses to wear a shirt, but they earned it. ACAB.
This album didn't really stand out. I liked it but I wouldn't go out of my way to listen to it again.
A genre defining masterpiece. Too bad Kanye West died in that tragic plane crash back in 2018. In all seriousness, rich musicians are usually terrible people. Jimmy Page diddled kids and there is still no way in hell Led Zeppelin IV getting less than 5 stars from me. The only reason this gets treated differently is that social media wasn't around when our 60's rock heroes were committing horrific sex crimes, while every second of Kanye's descent into madness is documented in vivid detail on the internet. At then end of the day it would be ahistorical to pretend this album doesn't exist, as its impact on the music is so far reaching that there is no way to contextualize other work without discussing it. It would also be irresponsible to continue to give this unhinged lunatic your money. Don't go to his shows, steal his albums (or listen on spotify, they don't pay their artists anyway), but don't lie to yourself by saying this album isn't great.
Certainly one of the two greatest live prison performances by Johnny Cash to make this list. Did we really need both? That feels a bit redundant. That being said, it is still Johnny Cash, so it still bangs. Shoutout to the only artist me and my 90 year old grandpa both like.
It's dad rock, but it's well executed dad rock. While listening to this album I experienced moments of unadulterated bliss, and minutes of unadulterated boredom.
Zesty. Perhaps a tad too zesty. This was a lot for a Wednesday morning. I am glad I listened, but would need to be in a very specific mood to listen again.
I feel like this album had a lot of solid to good tracks, but no standout moments.
I really appreciate the Talking Head's ability to foster a distinctive sound while still being catchy. My only complaint about this album is that it was repetitive at times and would have benefited from having a couple of the weaker tracks shaved off.
An unexpected banger from a band I thought was a one hit wonder. The first half is stronger than the second.
I like the idea of this album more than the album itself. It makes perfect sense that in the early 70’s the beach boys would look beyond simple songs about love and good times and make a more serious record addressing the issues of the day. However, perhaps in an attempt to sound more serious, they largely abandoned the catchy hooks and beautiful multi-part harmonies that made their early music so enjoyable, leaving behind fairly bland album. I wish I could have heard a version of this album that pursued this newfound political focus while still retaining the sonic qualities of their earlier work.
The instrumentals are light years ahead of the lyrics. The guitar work is a reminder that music theory isn’t everything. I am amazed by how many awesome riffs the young brothers can pull out of the same scale and chord progression. I also think Bon Scott has the better voice of the two AC/DC singers, even if the songwriting is stronger on Back in Black.
This album made me feel nothing.
So hear me out, this album isn't THAT bad. Don't get me wrong, It's weird as hell and I am sure everyone involved in its creation was on enough LSD to kill a silverback gorilla, but it don't think it merits bottom 10 status. I am only 35 albums deep and I have already heard two albums that were definitively worse than this one. I think the reason this is rated so low is that is it is one of the weirdest bad albums I have ever heard, but to be honest I prefer bad and weird to bad and boring. I guess some days you are the tablecloth and some days you are the table.
Fuck I hate that I actually like this album. Perhaps shoegaze actually is a real genre and not just a flimsy excuse to buy too many guitar pedals. Instrumentally it is right in the sweetspot of early shoegaze where the sound is unique and atmospheric but still somewhat comprehensible. Lyrically, I can't comment because I don't think I understood a single word.
A fun modern take on the blues. If I was more of a blues guy I would probably rate it higher.
I really liked the instrumentals, particularly the drums, but found the vocals to be hit or miss with more miss than hit. I also think the lyrics tried to be more profound than they actually were. Yoshimi is a much better album in my opinion.
To me Aerosmith has always sounded like a lobotomized yet dangerously horny version of the Rolling Stones. That being said this album is their most tolerable musical output containing a better ratio of cool riffs to stupid vocals than their later records. Still, every time I considered reevaluating my opinion of the band a song like “big ten inch record” popped up to remind me why that isn’t necessary.
The recent trend of hating early 2000’s indie as well as the band’s sharp falloff in the late 2010’s have led some people to forget how special Arcade Fire’s first two albums were. This is a mistake. This album is near perfect. Despite being over an hour there isn’t a single tract I would remove. The definition of a 5/5.
Ironically this is the most 80's album I have ever heard. It gives vomiting long island iced tea into the upper deck of the ladies room toilet.
This album was extremely disappointing. I loved "Ill Communication", and expected to have similar feelings about "Paul's Boutique" considering that it is this most critically acclaimed Beastie Boys album. After finally listening, I just don't get it. There were a couple of nice moments, but I felt like this record leaned into the group's worst tendences. I wouldn't characterize the their lyrics as "cerebral" at the best of times, but in other albums the Bestie Boys managed to be clever in their crassness delivering corny lyrics with a tongue-in-cheek style that made it feel like they are in on the joke. This album lacked this self-aware levity. Furthermore, it failed to deliver the singable hooks on par with their more popular releases.
This album was rather boring, and a big step down from "Blue Lines".
I am not as good at analyzing rap, but album nice. Fuck Newt Gingrich.
I appreciate innovation, but at a certain point music just needs to sound good. Sometimes I think Bjork is more concerned about the former than the latter. That being said it still gets three stars because the highs were really high, you just need to sit through a lot of lows to get to them.
Apologies to Ron Burgundy, but that was too much jazz flute.
My personal favorite Bowie era. The best tracks were great and the worst tracks were at least ok.
Still better than any country album released in the last 30 years.
After grappling with the the moral dilemma of evaluating Kanye West's brilliant early work in the context of his recent fall from grace, it's a nice mental break to review a mediocre album from a shitty person.
This album is decent, but there are better Neil Young albums, so I don’t know why this one made the list.
Damn, David Bowie is a 4/5 machine. I have yet to rate any of his albums higher or lower. While I don't think any of his individual albums are "special" by themselves, the fact that he put out so many solid albums for so long while employing vastly different styles, is probably what makes him special as an artist.
The greatest trick the patriarchy every pulled was convincing the world Hole didn't exist.
In the latest episode of “the creators of this list don’t understand metal” we have British Steel by Judas Priest. Don’t get me wrong, British Steel is an decent album, and in a vacuum its inclusion on this list is defensible. However, the fact that it was selected as the token Priest album over Painkiller is an absolute travesty. British Steel fun at times, but it is extremely simplistic and a little corny. Painkiller is a work of musical virtuosity that changed heavy metal forever. If the authors of this list knew ball it would be on here instead. Yes, I know British Steel sold more records, but if that is our metric then why are there 10 fucking Nick Cave Albums on this list.
Edit: After re-listening to this album I am even lower on it than I originally thought. Outside of "Breaking the Law" it just doesn't have much to offer. Even Screaming for Vengeance would have been a far better pick. I also re-listened to painkiller and it slapped even harder than I remembered.
This is the best Beatles album. Fight me. Abby Road, Sgt. Peppers, and White album all have higher highs, but they also contain a decent amount of filler. Revolver is consistently great from start to finish.
It is difficult to muster a strong opinion in either direction about ambient music. It was decent to write to, but I don't think I would listen again in any other context.
The vocal harmonies sound great but I don't think this is Dolly's best writing.
Never in the history of rock and roll has an artist received greater accolades while contributing less to music than Elvis Presley. If white people in the 50s knew James Brown existed Elvis would have spent the decade pumping gas in Tennessee and we would all be better for it.
Side one (Speakerboxx) was excellent from start to finish, while side two (The Love Below) was extremely uneven with super high highs and low lows. If Outkast had trimmed some of the fat off this album it would be 5 stars. As it stands I will likely listen to tracks from this album regularly for the rest of my life without ever doing another full playthrough again.
I am not a huge fan of the lead singer's voice. The instrumentals were very cool at times, and got a little too progy at others.
This album contains flashes of greatness to come, but isn't particularly great itself. This makes sense for a band that is best known as the launching pad for exceptional musicians who went on to do amazing things ... with other bands.
Common Jack White W. It is simple but simplicity is the point. This was very close to a 5.
The 4 machine strikes again. This one was a little more uneven than his other albums with the title track being a 5 and everything else being a 3.5, but the end result is the same.
A solid but unspectacular hardcore punk album. If you enjoy the genre you probably liked it. If you don’t, this album likely isn’t the one to change your mind. In typical Ian Mackaye fashion, the lyrics are poignant at times but also very edgelordy. Brian Baker’s guitar work on this album is better than it was on previous minor threat albums but not as good as it would become with Bad Religion.
Sonic ambien. I can't deny that this album objectively is well made, but I wish everyone involved had applied their talents toward something less boring. "Born Under a Bad Sign" really rubs this in by reminding you about the existence of better music that you could be listening to instead.
The instrumentals on this album are awesome, but the super 80's vocal delivery made it feel a bit dated. Despite this gripe the I thought their sound was interesting enough to merit listening to more of their work, so I tried low end theory and it was amazing. Low end theory keeps the stellar beats going but trades in some of the corny moments present on this album for a smoother, more intelligent flow that takes the group’s sound to the next level. I highly recommend it. I think the most important thing this list taught me is that the best hip-hop doesn't usually garner mainstream popularity. This has been been true of rock music for decades, so I don't know why I was surprised that it was true for rap as well.
If I was the subject of this album I would have filed for a restraining order.
Yep, that sounds like electronic music to me.
I think Tommy is a tad overrated. In this era The Who's live sound was miles ahead of their studio sound. Furthermore, while all operas, including rock operas, have sections that are more for exposition than for enjoyment Tommy has more "exposition songs" than other albums of its ilk. Despite dedicating so much space to exposition there are still crucial details about the plot that are not clear from the music alone i.e. the death of captain walker. Still there are enough cool moments on this album i.e. "Go to the Mirror", "Pinball Wizard", "Christmas", and "Eyesight to the Blind" to bring the listener back in after the more plot heavy moments to make the album enjoyable overall. Tommy also deserves credit inspiring other artists to take creative risks and see albums as more than a collection of singles.
These may be the worst instrumentals I have ever heard in my life. They are a pure distillation of everything bad about the "80's sound". I have no way to objectively gauge the quality of the lyrics or vocal performance, because every line is undercut by what sounds like a toddler vomiting on a synthesizer. These could be the most masterfully written songs of all time and I simply would have no way of knowing because my body is actively rejecting this music like a bacterial infection. I can't comment on the political arguments in this album, because there is no political argument strong enough to survive with this soundtrack behind it. If these instrumentals were playing behind Churchill's speech during the battle of Britain, England would have surrendered immediately.
Not really my vibe, but it seemed well made.
At least it was interesting. After sitting through far too many boring albums it was strangely refreshing to listen to something that at least tried to be different. Don't get me wrong, I am never listening to this album again, but I am at least happy that I listened to it once, which is more than I can say for "69 Love Songs".
