BEYONCÉ

Music made by committee for hairdressing salons.

Really? Beyonce? Christ, ok. aaaand it was just as shit as expected. Just r&b that sounds like it was made in a factory. Because it was. Naturally there are about 10000000 outside writers per song. Why does the music press pretend this shit is a personal statement about anything? Like oh yeah this really came from her heart.... and the hearts of about 500 dudes. 1/5 get the fuck outta here.

Uggghhhhh. I can't with this crap. There's no merit here. Beyoncé seems like more of a product to me than a person. When a massive team of people does all the work and you just show up to sing, I mean, where’s the artistry in that? It just feels so manufactured and artless.

I never really understood the hype surrounding Beyonce, sure she has a good voice, but I tend to think her massive appeal and commercial success is more attributed to Beyonce the "product", rather than just the music. I'm always suspicious when you hear about an artist's personal life just as much as their music. I hadn't listened to her music more than what I've been force-fed on the radio and music videos and she is what she is. A above-average singer, with an above average hype machine behind her = the greatest singer of her generation...yeah, right.

I would like to thank whoever lent Beyoncé Knowles-Carter a copy of Yeezus, and I would also like to thank Jay-Z for pretty clearly having outright psychopathic dick game. BEYONCÉ is an erotic, playful, and personal—well, as personal as something with like 30 writers can be—record with a sound that gleefully defies expectations. There's some pretty sexy shit on here, but what grabbed me most was how much fun she seems to be having on the microphone, confidently busting out Lil Jon & the Eastside Boyz references, I-run-this-shit chest beating and barely-disguised, Prince-esque sex rhymes in-between examining her self-image and serenading her newborn daughter. The second half can't keep up with the runaway momentum of the first (barring ***Flawless, it sounds more like what I expected going into the album, bland Drake feature and all), but this was a damn fine surprise overall. Key Tracks: Haunted, Blow, Partition

Look, I'll be the first to admit this isn't my scene, ok? But this ... thing ... is so unrelentingly synthetic and repetitive that it hurts my soul. I get the motivation behind it which is why it doesn't get a fully failing score. Bey wanted to git duurty. Sure. Maybe hire some studio musicians next time instead of just a stack of producers, though. Because, despite the vocal and lyrical talent, it's just frikkin' boring.

Overhyped, overproduced, self-indulgent pretentious tosh!

This album has extremely high highs, and while there are some definite lows, the highs dramatically make up for it. Side note: I really dislike people who hate pop music for no reason. Just because you dislike pop music doesn't mean you'll dislike every pop album. Take a fucking chill pill and stop being so pretentious.

Another one of my faves. I hadn't actually listened to this album in a while. It's starting to sound like a product of its era, the synth-pop sounds of the early 2010s. The entire album is a masterwork, telling stories of horniness, womanhood, motherhood and other delights. "Flawless" is such a tune and it takes me back to the summer of 2013/2014, when waking up like this was my goal in life (and still is, tbh). I also like that Beyonce kind of invented the "surprise album" era, gifting fans with no just a full album but also fully realised music videos for each track. "Drunk In Love" is also a fab track but I cannot emphasise how much of an absolute perfect tune "Flawless" is.

Not every part of the Beyonce package is to my taste. She's too musical theatre at times, too breathy and others, and sometimes just too darn slow. But grandiosity is her metier, and this trades artlessly in the language of significance from front-to-back. She sends a lackey to fetch Drake and Frank Ocean, reduces them to the prupose she has in mind, then flicks them back out the door. She's one of just a few artists who can pull off such pomposity. Maybe the only one of the current era. What keeps her grounded--like down and diiiiiirty grounded--is sex! sex! sex! "I can't wait till you get home so you can turn that cherry out" is great. But it's the way she replicates foreplay and climax in the pop song structure that makes this soar. And Partition may be the most accurate musical interpretation of a shaking booty ever.

vapid drivel, some of the worst music in a long time

"Music made by committee for hairdressing salons" says that other review. There's some truth to that hilarious negative take, I'm not gonna deny it. Yet if that's the case, that means that Beyoncé's salon is the most extraordinary hairdressing salon that has ever been built on the surface of this earth--with inviting nooks and crannies where all sorts of fun and kinky stuff may happen ; with lush decorations and night club lights that can elicit the most relaxing bliss in your mind or conversely thrill you enough to dance all night long ; with endearing memorabilia hung on the walls relating to Beyoncé's life course from Houston to New York; and with time-travelling portals transporting you to the most fascinating hip places, from NYC to Paris--all of this run by young nymphs and ephebes doing all they can to make you feel comfortable. This sort of salon is worth visiting, at least once. And if you can get a fresh haircut around your elated ears in the process, it's a win-win situation, clearly. More specifically, and all metaphors about hairdressing salons aside, this album is a playful exploration into groovy styles of all stripes : R'n'B, electronica, soul, hard funk, hip hop... The first three tracks create a perfect first act: opener "Pretty Hurts" displays effective soul-infused earworms from get-go, with quite interesting turns of phrase lambasting "perfection-at-all-cost" ; the Timbaland-produced "Haunted" is a nocturnal gem, with a simple melody that eventually turns into epic proportions, with many sonic details suggesting a cyberpunk, Bladerunner-like landscape found in the most expensive sci-fi flicks ; and "Drunk In Love", produced by the same Timbaland and Pharrell Williams, and propelled by a weird, Eastern-flavored sampled vocal hook, offers a shameless and immodest peep into Queen Bey and Jay-Z's intimacy--which could have turned out ridiculous if the music wasn't so sexy. After those three tracks, Mrs. Carter shifts gears several times, loses the thread at some other points (a flaw that's found in all of her last three blockbuster LPs--indeed written by committees and therefore a little haphazard as a result)... and yet she always gets back on her feet somehow. "Blow/Cherry"--with that striking one-liner about "turning cherries out"--foretells the post-disco endeavours of *Renaissance* ten years later or so. "Partition/Yoncé" is a two-part snapshot about lust and celebrity whose narcissitic impulses are redeemed by its dark yet pristine EDM flourishes--amazing how the digital basslines slap in this record, by the way : my hi-fi system is not high class, and yet those bass frequencies rumble like in almost no other record in my collection. As for "Jealous" and "XO", they are pop jewels that could have actually been expanded way beyond their short time count. In between those highlights, there's a couple of more meandering or demonstrative-for-their-own sake compositions (including one with a featuring by Drake where he somehow manages not sounding *too* ridiculous, lol). Yet fortunately, the last act is as strong as the first. *Flawless* is an trap-inspired, bombastic partytime dirge boasting about "perfection" with opera-like vocals in the background (maybe in a part-ironic fashion, just as in "Pretty Hurts"--given the snippet concluding it). "Superpower" is a subdued, "doo-wop 2.0" ballad that goes to interesting minimalistic places. And "Heaven" and "Blue" are other heartfelt cuts whose straightforward simplicity (foretelling the more intimate moods of Bey's next LP *Lemonade*) make them both memorable and endearing. Everything after "Blue" on Spotify are bonus tracks that are part of the record's "Platinum Edition" (mostly remixes and some extra featurings by Nicki Minaj and Kanye West). Nothing essential there, except from "Ring Off", a lively yet quite subtle number dedicated to Beyoncé's mother after the latter decided to part ways with her husband. So how should I grade this? 4/5? 4.5/5? The "writing-as-a-commitee" nature of this album often yields great results, but it's also probably the root cause of the few underwhelming moments in its middle section. Yet if you took away those underwhelming cuts, you'd still have a great album with a pretty satisfying length. My best guess is that the only problem Beyoncé has as an insanely rich artist curating and partly writing all these songs is that no one in her entourages dares question some of her choices, hence the "all-in-the-pot" nature of her LPs. But honestly, it's a very minor flaw for anyone interested enough in modern African-American music. I'm gonna round up my 4.5/5 grade to a perfect 5, then. Number of albums left to review: 381 Number of albums from the list I find relevant enough to be mandatory listens: 281 (including this one) Albums from the list I *might* include in mine later on: 146 Albums from the list I won't include in mine (many others are more essential to me): 199

This album is incredibly pretentious without the chops to back it up. I just think about how she acted like she invented the idea of a surprise drop... the same year that Bowie and MBV did it.

HAHAHAHHA FUCKING SHOPPING CENTER MUSIC LMAOOOOO. Da mi se sluša ova glupača ošo bi u arenu centar, a ne bio na ovoj stranici.

It's modern mainstream pop music... These pop people are always kinda funny to me. They're like full grown adults most of the time (I guess she was ~32 when this was released) and they have to sing these ridiculous songs ("Blow" comes to mind) and dress in these crazy outfits all the time. Sure, she's only 32 at the time here and maybe "Can you eat my skittles?" and "Turn that cherry out" are actually the artistic statements she wants to make... Regardless, the lyrics on this album are just ridiculously cheesy. Whatever pays the bills I guess.

There's a lot of variety in the music, Beyonce always sounds the same. It might be a nice variety if you liked any of it but for me it's just messy. Beyonce loves a lick out. Sometimes a man chats. French woman also likes sex. There's a child on this. I don't get it

Not great

no no no

This is the album that really turned Beyoncé into the mega star she is today and it’s easy to see why. Almost everyone song was a major hit and they’re all good. Plus features from the biggest artists of the decade, especially if you swap some of the originals for the Deluxe remixes

This album is a monster of singles, and at the same time so cohesive. This is one of the things that separates Beyonce from other similar artists. I think the thing that pushes it up to 5 is Partition/Yonce.

Drunk in love, yall

Queen Bee sounds fine but too many of the songs are fillerish. When she hits she absolutely KNOCKS IT OUT OF THE PARK. For me though it’s an inconsistent listen. There’s a lesson in there that Beyoncé learned in later releases with far better flow and function.

This list is selling out

Love me some Queen B

I should listen to more Beyoncé

Creó que nunca había escuchado esta joya. Siento que no me quedó de otra más que ser que ser simp por Queen B. Me gustó todo el disco la verdad, pero llevo un par de horas escuchando Mine con Drake, va directo a mis canciones favs de los 2010s. Mood: I woke up like this

this album is particularly gash. its a mish mash of shitty current rap styles with beyonces trademark warbling over the top with bags of #sass because #slay #queen. fucking awful from a loathsome dick head.

Considering she's the biggest recording artist in the world, nobody I've asked has ever been to name 5 Beyonce songs. I've asked a lot of people. I'll try to do it myself now... Crazy in Love (from like two thousand and fucking three) Erm...The put a ring on it one Erm...Halo? I can only think of Destiny's Child songs now..... Nope

This is a pretty damn epic album, which does explain some of the worship given to Her Majesty. There were a couple of times my arms almost went up in the air in praise. We all knew she could sing, but here was a real VOICE. Anyone who can sing an ugly word like "ass" the way Beyoncé does in the opening line of "Rocket" is truly a virtuoso (virtuosa?). I almost felt overly voyeuristic in the more erotic numbers because they were so personal and intimate. But I suppose that goes for all of the emotions expressed in this album as well. "Pretty Hurts" is quite a message coming from someone who we all just sort of assumed reigned over the world with effortless beauty. The video is pretty gut-punching. And speaking of videos, I note that this album was meant to be accompanied by all the videos (I never saw an "Audio Only" warning on an album), but I was only able to sample a few today. It was time well spent.

I have many thoughts. But before the haters come for me - Beyonce has an amazing voice, I just don't like her music This was just bad. The rapping (not sure I can call it that?) was not good. I grew up listening to destiny's child, and I think Beyonce has some great songs from earlier in her career. But this album is a big no for me. I'd have enjoyed it more if she sang ballads rather than this generic radio crap Everytime I start getting into a song, the beat changes and it seems like a complete different song. Odd choice "I sneezed on the beat and the beat got sicker" - sounds like something a 13 year old would come up with. Speaking of the lyrics - so many people co-writing, and thats the best they could come up with? I hated drunk in love when it came out, and can confirm I still hate it now Flawless was particularly offensive on my ears. Terrible The only song I like is XO - and only because I love the John Mayer cover and I thought it was his original song Also the thought of her getting it on with Jay Z makes me unwell. I don't want to hear about it (blow comes to mind) The whole album seems like she's overcompensating and telling everyone how in love she is and how much sex she's getting. Like we all don't know her husband was cheating the whole time 2 ⭐️

This sounds like the most expensive album I've ever heard. Hundreds of cowriters and producers involved and it stops it from being cohesive. Obviously she has a great voice but does nothing for me

Beyoncé has an amazing voice but this album did absolutely nothing for me, I already forgot everything about what I listened to

Surprisingly intolerable. People listen to this?

No hay mucho que decir. Creo que es mi disco favorito de Beyoncé, no hay skips prácticamente y hasta la edición platino me parece que sí aporta. Beyoncé en control de tantas cosas, un control que no ha soltado en discos posteriores, su voz tiene tantos matices y las melodías, pegajosas y envolventes, se acoplan muy bien a ella. Favs: "Drunk in Love" (y el remix, muy bien, con su eterno enamorado: Kanye), "Blow", "No Angel", "Rocket" y "Superpower". 10/10

An easy listen! Not the biggest fan but I can happily listen to her and knew quite a lot of this album thanks to my girlfriend playing it. Really wish you could give half stars cause 4 seems too much but 3 seems to low. Oh well, 4 it is!

Undeniably catchy and killer crisp production. Not sure where the album ended since the platinum edition was all Spotify had for me. I was gonna complain about how every song is just unending sexual euphemisms but that would make me seem like “old man yells at cloud.”

I mean it's the queen of pop for the 21st century. I get that this was an event when it was dropped but again, it's just more bland R&B - at least the production is interesting that's what saves it. Just. Best Tracks: Pretty Hurts; Drunk In Love (feat. Jay-Z); Partition

Highly overrated in my opinion. It's fine but not gonna go out of my way to listen to this again

It’s impossible to deny the talent behind this album, but it is very much the definition of “not for me”

I think I'm at a 4.5 that I'm gonna very graciously round up to a 5, even though I don't think it's /quite/ at a 5. It’s probably unfair, given that I listened to RENAISSANCE and COWBOY CARTER earlier this year, and I think those albums are absolutely spectacular, so I’m being a little biased in comparing this release from 9 to 11 years earlier to those albums, but… yeah. It’s very clear to me that this is an absolutely fabulous album, but for my tastes, there's just /something/ that falls a little flat on this album, and I’m not sure what it is. It’s not her vocals; her vocals are great. It’s not her lyricism, because her confidence after having Blue Ivy shines through brilliantly on these lyrics. I don’t even know if it’s the production; I thought there were great beats throughout this album and some stellar production work, especially on the Pharrell-led tracks… but there are a few songs with that sort of early 2010s pop feel that hasn’t aged as well to me, for some reason. I love Counting Stars, for example – Ryan Tedder produced XO – but if it came out in 2024, it wouldn’t feel as good, you know? In other words, I’m looking at these through a 2024 lens, which is a bit unfair, but ultimately, most of the tracks succeed at keeping a super contemporary feel, even now. Regardless of anything I just typed out, I REALLY liked this album. It’s super enjoyable, but for some reason or another that I just can't place, I’m just stuck on a 4.5, but I'd be a little rude to not round it up -- it's certainly higher than a 4.

It’s so interesting listening to this album knowing that in 2 years she drops Lemonade. This whole vibe of this album is like “you’re bad, im bad, look how sexy i am but also maybe you’re cheating on me but look how sexy I am we can get through this”. She is honest and trying to hold it all together. then she loses her mind in Lemonade… starts to explore other parts of her identity and allows herself to get mad at JayZ. Favorite songs: partition and flawless (which almost belongs in Lemonade). My only criticism is that sometimes the songs seem to stretch out unnecessarily but I imagine that is purposeful because that’s how she’s feeling in life at this moment

should have won album of the year at the 2015 grammys, it's insane I still have to pick my fave song because it changes each time like she's so sick for this excellence

I don’t listen to Beyoncé much…really just when a tunes pops on the radio or something. I found some songs quite pretty and some quite sexy. Her voice is so smooth and can really draw you in.

Smooth, sexy, powerful, and empowering. I feel like kicking the patriarchy's ass today. More so.

WOW! There’s a reason she’s Queen Bey. Incredible album that tells incredible stories. Absolutely amazing!

‘ I cooked this meal for you naked So where the hell you at?’

Like the Instagram stories of your friend from school who married young - goes between gushing over her 'hottie' husband one day to posting 'why are men are such snakes? x' the next. In private, despite puffing up her husband and congratulating him on their sex-life, there's a growing sense of melancholy and resentment as she's coming to terms with family life, constantly having to tell herself that she's still got it. It's relatable despite being written by a multi-platinum-multi-millionaire married to another multi-platinum-multi-millionaire. Much more rewarding than her Queen Bee singles era.

It’s rare for me to get an album as recent as this. I think I have only had a few others that came out within the last decade. And Beyoncé as an artist is not a mystery to me. I am very aware of who this woman is. But I’ve actually never listened to one of her solo records. After looking into the background info, it’s clear to me that there was a lot of ambitious ideas behind the creation of this album. It was huge on release. For something that came out near the very end of 2013, it performed incredibly well and pulled some of the highest streaming numbers ever on Apple Music up until that point. And I think this just has to do with Beyoncé herself. It seems like everything this woman is involved in goes global. And she is definitely one of the most successful talents of the 21st century. So of course, a woman like her would be able to pull together a star-studded list of people to produce her record. And pull it together she did. It’s actually crazy how many individual producers and writers featured here. Maybe the most I’ve ever seen on one record. She got the likes of Mike Dean, Pharrell, Justin Timberlake, Timbaland, Miguel, and even Caroline Polachek. Plus this ambitiousness is also aided by the creation of a short film for each song. And she was even working with some big names on that front as well. But from a music stand point, how does this hold up? The production is obviously amazing on pretty much all of the songs. How could it not be? I love all of the unique sounding instrumentals and cool beat switches. They are actually a ton of beat switches, which leads to this album feeling overwhelming sometimes. And Beyoncé herself shines through as a performer and singer so beautifully. She can obviously sing her ass off. But this is also a very tense, sexual, and personal album. That’s something I’ll always appreciate about her music. It’s apparent she puts her heart and soul, and truly a piece of herself, into every project she puts out. But when put up against other contemporary R&B music I’ve heard, it’s just not the same. There are stand out songs for sure. The closer Blue is an incredibly heartfelt tribute to her daughter, and the perfect way to end the album. But the songs that don’t stick out to me feel like a lot of filler pop and R&B music that I would rather hear from other artists. I wish I could speak more positively about the content of this, but some songs are just uninteresting and lacking. Rating: 6/10

Until today, the only time I ever listened to Beyonce on purpose was when I was learning to play Redemption Song so I was searching for live covers and found a version with her singing while Eddie Vedder handled the guitar. I quite liked that cover but I was never attracted to her own music; although from what I can see on this album, she doesn't write any of what I just called "her own music". I was expecting to hear some "poppy" songs, as might be typical for someone so popular but there aren't many here. I guess one positive thing to say is "At least it's not pop." Perhaps there is some magic in the lyrics which I didn't really pay attention to on my first listen. Since Charlie Watts passed today I'd rather play some Stones than spend another hour listening to this album to see if the lyrics justify a higher rating. Even if the lyrics are top shelf, they aren't her lyrics so I'm not sure they should move the needle higher.

She's not for me

1.5 how is possible to have this album among The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin and others...my god

This is music just to make money, not music just to make music. No soul. No passion. No heart. No, thank you.

Was actually looking forward to this. Beyonce seems to have a knack to choose good songs to sing. I also really like her live album which really showcases her live performance skills. This album lacked the energy I think her live performances have. I felt the whole thing was the lowest common denominator bland pop. Quite disappointed, none of my favourite songs are on this record and the whole thing just fell a bit flat. Beyonce is maybe more a performer than album creator. Highlight was "Flawless" with its excellent beat. Listen to "Homecoming: The Live Album" for what I was hoping for.

You could throw me onto the “where are the songs?” pile of middle-aged (mostly) white guys reviewing this, but I’m bothered by how obstinately obtuse this is: songs seem to contain half a dozen or so ideas stitched together, but not quite followed through on, just polished to a gleam, dressing to exquisitely-sung self-help advice columns, with the occasional rapper dropping in as guest commentator. The money drips off the production, it sounds spectacular. It is an expensive folly - the architectural kind - a bit of a chore, and extremely, confusingly successful.

Afraid the production kills this for me. I just can't get over the pop-focused mechanics that drains any real human emotion. Sad, because I want to marry her.

A resplendent, beautiful minge, that you would be proud to eat your dinner off. Although I would eat every last crumb that would drop out of her vag and treasure it forever, her music doesn't really send my tastebuds into ecstasy. A rather bland and bitter relish smacks against my lips and leaves a nasty taste in my throat. Her beef lips, rubbery and ferocious as they may be, cannot mask the foul stench of her mediocre beats and limp lyrics that pour out of this unappetising banquet. A feast to forget, but a fanny full of flavour.

Album die mij niet compleet aanstaad omdat het niet mijn genre is. Wel enkele bekende hits erop zoals drunk in love en partition.

I'll admit that my biases are definitely not going to help me fairly review this album. I cannot stand Beyonce, her husband, or most music that requires 12 songwriters and 32 producers on each track. I guess in a way this album was a lot less annoying than I thought it would be, but I kind of feel like it has more of a mellow, laid back, and maybe even darker vibe than most of her other music. I don't really plan on listening to more to prove this, just a speculation. At the end of the day, it's just soulless pop that I really cannot stand. It just feels entirely manufactured to make money vs. being a true artistic expression. It appears that Beyonce only contributes vocals. Well this is totally fine, I just really appreciate musicians (especially those who go by their name and not a band/group name) who branch out and try other things. Look, I'm not expecting her to become a talented pianist, guitarist, whatever, but I mean can't you contribute ANYTHING other than just your vocals? Play around with some instrument and have your producers make it sound perfect in the mixing stage. Clank around on some keys, whack away at some percussion that can be put barely audible in the mix. It's your damn album with your damn name all over it, why wouldn't you want to have more of a part in it?! And how much of this songwriting is actually yours when you share credit with a dozen other people on each songs? It's just so contrived and fake to me that I cannot really truly judge this music for anything other than a product to sucker lazy and uncreative people into giving their money away. I mean, aren't Beyonce and Jay-Z practically billionaires? I picked up some line in a song about "working a 9-5"...as if these people have absolutely any clue what that's like. It's just all so fake. The stuff I found myself enjoying the most (see: not very much) just sounded like a really crappy pastiche of something Prince has already done a million times better...and likely ALL BY HIMSELF...all instruments, singing, production, songwriting, etc.. Not a million producers and co-writers. Not modern recording technology to fix every mistake. Just the polar opposite of an artist to me. In that same realm, this album is just way too horny, and if anything it's more hilarious to my ears than anything I could call sexy. Cringey, lame, and basic lyrics everywhere. Doesn't feel like there is much of an attempt to poetically weave these concepts and feelings into the music in any way, they're just all seemingly expressed point blank and as simply as they can. Make it as easy for your audience to "get it" as you can, don't require any real thought or challenge your listeners in any way. I'm really hoping there aren't many more of these kind of modern, overproduced garbage-for-the-unthinking-masses type albums on here.

Well. Can’t say I expected this. The Grateful Dead and Beyoncé in one week. Hell, in two days. Hell is a recurring theme in my reviews and in my mind Beyoncé’s name bellows through the caverns of Hell as you’re dragged through the gates. Yes, white man doesn’t like Beyoncé. Think what you will, but I’ve always found her voice to be grating, and the songs to lack structure and musicality to the point where I’m baffled that it appeals to the mainstream. Now, with my biases laid bare to my nonexistent readership, let us take flight and ascend to the rarified air held by pop’s most overrated songstress. Let me get my air sickness bag ready. Pretty Hurts - My aspiration is to get past this as soon as possible. Right off the bat, this reminds me of having panic attacks in high school and not knowing what they were. That’s a fun place to start. 100% unlistenable garbage. Generic lyrics written by some generic writer spit out by somebody whose cult of personality far outweighs their musical contribution. Haunted - Death metal song title. Song makes me wish for death. Hey if this song was by Death Grips, I’d probably like it. Rub in that your fans have to work. Queen. Oh she’s asking How come? How come we have to work? Because you and your doofus boyfriend need to be billionaires. Everybody you associate with and their hoarded wealth are direct contributors. See, when one person has more money than they could possibly ever spend, there needs to be somebody to prop up that system. That’s probably why we need to work all day to stay alive. Somebody has to be at the back of the human centipede. Anyway. This is lyrically disgusting and the song itself is incredibly boring. Drunk in Love - Oh boy. A song about sex with the grossest man in the planet. Hey my big body has also been drunk outside of a jet ski rental, saying SURFBOARD repeatedly. I was politely asked to leave. I was very agreeable and got right on the bus. This story, like the story in the song, is not true. I hate Jay-Z. I hate Beyoncé. Blow - Yeah errrm it sure does!!! Got her. I’d like to thank professional wrestler, Tugboat/Shockmaster. Couldn’t have done it without your perseverance. I’d also like to thank the concept of divorce for when these two eventually invoke that sacred rite. This sounds like she’s in her bedroom, singing over funk preset B, oh and then funk preset C from her Casio keyboard. No Angel - JESUS. What are these vocals?? You can’t sing. Too many people have propped her up. This is no good. No angels left. I’m sure there’s a satanic poem in there somewhere but I can’t go two days in a row. I have to get some better material. So does Beyoncé. Partition - There was a part of the limo we weren’t allowed to go to. A hand kept coming through and it had a Super Bowl ring. TK Jewellers is a scam. This was another R & B song about sex. Crash this limo, would ya? Jealous - Why are you cooking, naked? That seems unsafe. Also, your love interest wouldn’t even appreciate that if he wasn’t there? This song is sickening. Not in a “girl this is sickening, I’m gagged” kind of way either. The absolute worst song so far, and just imagine the territory that takes in. Rocket - Man, I may be repressed, but is this really what people want to listen to? Why would you sing this and then release it?I am literally a Canadian man sitting in front of an excel document while she sings about her sexual exploits. What was the intended audience for this? Say this in private. Whatever. This is the worst song so far. Mine - Oh boy! Drake is going to be here!! I can’t wait to suffer through TWO massively overrated singers for the price of one. Actually, price of two. I pay both prices like the dead pay the ferryman. He’s so cringeworthy. Holy shit. Growing up in Canada, you know kids like this. Wannabe rappers are around every corner. This guy somehow fleeced the planet. This is an overproduced staccato monstrosity, and guess what? The worst song so far. XO - Think of this song title as a millennial emoji. That way, he looks like he’s vomiting. Holy shit. This plays on the elevator to hell. THE CLAPS. What are we doing here? This is a failed submission for a World Cup song. This song was found graveyard of musical expression, dead, next to a group of half exhumed corpses. 4th straight worst song so far. Flawless - hey, the feminist speech is the best part of this whole album. Says a lot of unsaid things. Unfortunately it has to be interrupted by a woman who spent the previous 9 tracks destroying my ears and brain. If this is her rapping, I can see why she sings. Superpower - Drop Frank in the ocean, bin laden style. I kid the man, but I can’t take anymore of this. I’m breaking over here. Starting to have fractures in my vision. Heaven - Spirals cut through the sky. Streams of molten blood flash behind forms clad in white. Blissful sky scarred with unknown aberrations. Sickening thuds. Angels fall, crumpled in their human forms. Earth beckons their mangled vessels back beneath. Black smoke rises as the bell peals. Populace frozen in panic. The ritual has begun, and so goes the world. I said I wouldn’t do it, but when an album outs you in a headspace, you have to ride the wave. I’ll do a fun one. Blue - Once upon a smiling dew-soaked toadstool, there lived a family of gluttonous hogs. These hogs ate all that they could see. One day, they decided to invent the concept of parties. They shifted the kaleidoscope, and trumpeted the bugle they had invented the week before to call all the animals of the forest of gluttony. Even the lowly gerbils were at the hog shindig. When the police finally stopped the party, the hogs had discovered truths of their own; alcohol poisoning. So goes the fable of the gluttonous hogs. Remember kids; drink responsibly. What can I say? What do you want me to say? I hate this. I hated this worse than I expected to. Call me corny, call me repressed, but this just doesn’t fit my tastes whatsoever. The lyrics range from erotica, to ham-fisted romance that sounds like a forced instagram Valentine’s Day post with your partner over your shoulder. The music is where this really goes to die. Each song is barren, washed out club music that sounds like a Pepsi commercial mixed with that millennial “edge” that has coffee shops use “fuck” in their Facebook ads. The singing is brutal too. Overblown with an unpleasant tone throughout. She’s so completely unlikable. I cannot fathom why she is popular, or seen as so “iconic.” Everything about this makes me feel like an extra terrestrial. Enjoy your death trap, earthlings. Take me to Glognard-7. The noxious celestial swamp gases are a bummer, but at least the music is better. 0 HIGHLIGHTS: I ❤️ MUSIC 🎶

Not for me

Vapid, empty, shit. Lowest form of pop written by white dudes for the radio. Total trash. And FUCK you for making me listen to this shit for an hour and a half.

Overproduced and self-indulgent. I’ve never listened to an album that so desperately needed an editor to step in and kill half of what’s going on. Every song seems to have 20 things happening simultaneously, making it impossible to pay attention to anything. I’m sure there are great songs here, and I wouldn’t mind listening to a stripped-back version of some of them, with more focus on Beyoncé’s voice and less layered synth, tinny drum sounds, random background vocals, samples, and pounding bass. The whole thing gives the effect of trying to listen to multiple radio stations at the same time. Ultimately, this is one star because there’s not a single song I would include on a playlist, and as an album, it just a tedious bore that goes on and on and on.

Inert and lifeless. I don't get it.

It's a 2 but I'm marking it down for the Lewinsky line

vapid drivel, some of the worst music in a long time

Wtf is this trash

I'm sorry I have a strong grudge/bias against Beyonce ever since I had to do an entire unit on Lemonade my junior year of college. ok so this review turned out to be more of a rant. Is this album quiet? It felt way quieter than I am used to, I had to double check everything was set up properly. I'm not a fan of the 808 and synths (especially on Drunk in Love) they sound like default garage band synths. The synths in the background of Jay-Z's verse sound like wet farts. Partition also has annoying synths. Rocket really didn't need to be 6 and a half minutes. Actually a lot of these songs feel way to long and never really go anywhere dynamically. Flawless is a terrible song (I am really considering a 1 now). Superpower is so long and boring. (yeah I can't do this this is getting a 1) I tried I am sorry, there is very little I found enjoyable here. This is now a contender for one of my least favorite albums so far. I couldn't stand any thing past the first couple of songs. They all just meander for way to long and the production hurts this album so much. The last 7 songs all sound exactly the same and have no drive or anything to keep me interested. Overall, some very generic pop songs with some truly awful synths. The second half of this album just drags on forever there are like 0 choruses or anything engaging and they are just SO BORING. I also expected more from her vocally, everything seems pretty reserved (which is fine, but when the rest of the music is so boring I would like something to grab onto).

Fire!

One of the biggest surprises of this project for me is how much I liked this. This album is sexy as fuck, in every sense of the word.

5, very listenable and fun. Incomparable.

4,75

Beautiful - Impactful - Powerful

Chimamandas "verse" was a cultural reset. Sue me.

Honestly from other Bee, this or Lemonade is her best work.

A great record - was struggling to find why Beyoncé is so highly rated - and this album explains it. Good pop, hip hop and soul - stunning voice and a huge influence on a lot music that came after it. I would put it up there head to head with the Miseducation of Lauryn Hill.

Loved it!

I too get filthy when that liquor get into me. Superb. We be all night… Simpsons: Yes

Beyoncé’s fifth album Beyoncé is a remarkable piece of work in many ways. https://open.substack.com/pub/richcain/p/project-1001-beyonce-by-beyonce?r=4ztyq&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false

No notes!

Nice

A masterpiece.

Some fillers but many great songs.

I woke up like this! I was living in Japan when this album surprise dropped, so I got to watch it earlier than all of my friends in America. I remember being skeptical during "Pretty Hurts" but I was immediately sold by the next track, and video, "Ghost". I proceeded to watch this album regularly. I was in my first solo apartment and in a foreign country so I had a lot of time to just jam to Yoncé. If you have time to watch the visual album, I recommend it. It's beautifully done and adds a lot of context to the arc of the tracklist. Towards the end of my time abroad, a friend and her boyfriend (now husband) came to visit. We road tripped around and listened to a burned cd of this album. I have a distinct memory of us turning it up and belting "Rocket" more than once. How could you not want to sing that opening line?

This is one of those albums that brings back memories. I remember where I was in my life when this album came out. It was a staple in our house for a while. It’s still a classic — an ambitious, sprawling, sexy, genre-shifting album packed with great songs, surprising turns and cool details in the production. Here are some of my favorite parts: The skittering hip-hop drums on the moody “Haunted.” The silly Jay-Z verse on “Drunk in Love” I’ve heard so many times that it’s been etched into my brain forever. The bright neons and disco inflections on the sex jam “Blow.” The swagger of “Partition” and all its eyebrow-raising lyrics (“He Monica Lewinsky’d all on my gown,” “He like to call me peaches when we get this nasty”). The epic anthem “Flawless” (again with the swagger and those killer hip-hop snares). That slightly warped piano on “Blue,” which also almost sounds like “Over the Rainbow” in the beginning. I learned something new on this listen. The distorted backing vocals on “Rocket” that kind of sound like a guitar or a synth are Justin Timberlake! Great detail that adds a lot of style to the track. This is also one of those great albums where I bet everyone has their own favorite and least favorite songs. For me, I could pretty much always skip “Pretty Hurts” and just start the album at track 2. And the Drake-featuring “Mine” has some good bits but drags a little too. But whatever. Great albums don’t have to be perfect. This was a blast to revisit. Definitely one that I would include on my personal essential albums list.

**Album Review: _BEYONCÉ_ by Beyoncé – A Comprehensive Exploration** Beyoncé’s self-titled 2013 album, _BEYONCÉ_, was a landmark release, both in terms of its unexpected drop and the sonic and lyrical evolution it showcased. With no prior announcement, Beyoncé released the album as a "visual album" with 14 tracks and 17 accompanying music videos, revolutionizing the way music could be marketed and consumed. Beyond the shock value of its release, the album itself was a testament to Beyoncé’s maturation as an artist. In this in-depth review, we’ll examine the album’s lyrics, music, production, themes, and its cultural and musical influence while also discussing its pros and cons. ### 1. **Lyrics: A Deep Dive into Personal, Political, and Intimate Themes** The lyrics on _BEYONCÉ_ explore a range of personal, emotional, and occasionally political topics. Beyoncé dives into vulnerability, sexual empowerment, motherhood, self-doubt, and racial identity. The album is unflinchingly intimate in its revelations, reflective of a woman unafraid to present her multifaceted experiences. - **Vulnerability and Empowerment:** On "Pretty Hurts," the opening track, Beyoncé critiques society's obsession with beauty standards. The line “Perfection is a disease of a nation” explores the pressures women face to conform to societal beauty norms, while questioning the emotional toll this conformity takes. "No Angel" and "Mine" show a softer, more fragile side to Beyoncé, grappling with imperfection in love and the internal struggle of maintaining a relationship under constant scrutiny. "Haunted" portrays her search for something authentic amidst the pressures of fame and external expectations. - **Sexual Liberation:** Tracks like "Partition" and "Drunk in Love" present a confident and sensual Beyoncé. She revels in her sexual power, unapologetically embracing her role as both a wife and a sexually empowered woman. These songs flip traditional narratives around female sexuality, showing a woman who is in control of her desires and the narrative around her own body. The lyricism here is bold and provocative, especially in "Partition," where she teases with double entendres and evocative imagery. - **Motherhood and Feminism:** "Blue," dedicated to her daughter Blue Ivy, offers a heartfelt exploration of motherhood, reflecting Beyoncé’s fears and joys as a mother. The album overall carries an undercurrent of feminist themes. Beyoncé’s inclusion of a snippet from Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's TED Talk on feminism in the song "***Flawless***" explicitly declares the album’s stance on gender equality, though not all tracks engage feminism in an overt way. **Pros of the Lyrics:** - Beyoncé’s lyrical exploration of various themes—love, desire, identity, power—is multidimensional and raw. - She balances emotional vulnerability with confidence, offering a refreshing take on womanhood, sexuality, and self-expression. - The inclusion of feminist commentary adds a layer of depth, contributing to ongoing conversations about gender equality. **Cons of the Lyrics:** - Some critics argue that while the lyrics are thematically rich, they sometimes lack the poetic intricacy of artists like Solange or Frank Ocean. The messages are clear, but they can be somewhat direct or simplistic. ### 2. **Music: A Bold Fusion of Genres and Styles** Musically, _BEYONCÉ_ is an eclectic album that showcases Beyoncé’s ability to experiment with different genres while maintaining cohesiveness. It’s a significant departure from her earlier works, marking a shift towards darker, moodier, and more experimental sounds. - **Genres:** The album traverses a wide spectrum of genres, including R&B, hip-hop, pop, soul, and trap. Tracks like "Haunted" and "Ghost" delve into electronic and minimalist beats, blending atmospheric soundscapes with Beyoncé's ethereal vocals. "Flawless" and "Drunk in Love" bring a trap-influenced edge, while "Superpower" leans into a smooth, nostalgic soul sound. - **Production Choices:** The album’s production is top-notch, with major contributions from a star-studded roster of producers, including Timbaland, Pharrell Williams, Detail, and Boots. _BEYONCÉ_ plays with sonic texture, utilizing layers of intricate beats, bass-heavy rhythms, and stripped-down instrumentals. Songs like "Partition" have a minimalist feel, where production is used sparingly to create space for Beyoncé’s voice and the sensual narrative to breathe. Conversely, tracks like "***Flawless***" and "Haunted" showcase dense, multi-layered production, with distorted beats, syncopated rhythms, and background harmonies. - **Vocal Performance:** Vocally, Beyoncé is at the peak of her powers on this album. Her delivery is versatile: from the aggressive, self-assured vocal performance on "***Flawless***" to the breathy sensuality on "Partition," she demonstrates range and control. In tracks like "Heaven" and "Blue," she dials back the technicalities, allowing emotion to take precedence over vocal acrobatics. **Pros of the Music and Production:** - The album’s ability to seamlessly blend diverse genres showcases Beyoncé's range as an artist and willingness to experiment. - The production is rich, textured, and impeccably crafted, lending depth to the thematic content. - Beyoncé’s vocal performances are captivating, emotionally resonant, and powerful throughout. **Cons of the Music and Production:** - For some listeners, the album’s genre-blending may feel disjointed, as it jumps between styles without much transition. - The minimalist and dark production may not appeal to fans of Beyoncé’s earlier, more radio-friendly pop sound. ### 3. **Themes: Intimacy, Empowerment, and Control** _BEYONCÉ_ is thematically ambitious, tackling issues of personal identity, female empowerment, and the intersections of intimacy and power. - **Empowerment:** One of the album's central themes is empowerment, both personal and sexual. Beyoncé presents herself as a woman fully in control of her desires, her body, and her image. The exploration of sexuality, particularly on tracks like "Partition" and "Blow," is a bold statement on female agency, flipping traditional gender dynamics that often portray men as dominant in sexual relationships. - **Control:** Beyond sexual empowerment, _BEYONCÉ_ touches on control in other facets of life. Beyoncé exerts creative control over the project itself, releasing it in a manner that eschewed traditional marketing strategies. She presents herself as the sole architect of her career, emphasizing the importance of self-determination. Songs like "Flawless" and "Pretty Hurts" illustrate her critique of societal expectations, especially regarding beauty standards, while simultaneously celebrating self-acceptance and confidence. - **Motherhood:** The theme of motherhood plays an important role in this album. "Blue" is a tender ode to her daughter, reflecting Beyoncé’s vulnerability and love in this new phase of her life. The track offers a softer, more maternal side of Beyoncé, contrasting with the edgier, more explicit themes in other songs. **Pros of the Themes:** - The album’s focus on empowerment, both in personal and public realms, is timely and necessary, contributing to broader cultural conversations. - Beyoncé’s willingness to be vulnerable about motherhood, marriage, and her insecurities is refreshing, humanizing her larger-than-life persona. - The album's exploration of power dynamics in relationships, particularly through the lens of sexuality and desire, is subversive and challenges traditional narratives. **Cons of the Themes:** - The feminist message is sometimes inconsistent; while certain tracks strongly promote female empowerment, others (like "Drunk in Love") have been critiqued for normalizing unhealthy relationship dynamics, leading to a lack of thematic cohesion. ### 4. **Cultural and Musical Influence** _BEYONCÉ_ left an indelible mark on the music industry and pop culture. It altered how artists release music and engage with their audiences. By dropping a surprise visual album without prior promotion, Beyoncé defied industry norms, inspiring other major artists (like Drake and Rihanna) to adopt similar surprise releases. - **Impact on Music Marketing:** The album’s release strategy was revolutionary, leveraging digital platforms and social media to bypass traditional promotion. This approach changed how albums are rolled out, marking a shift in the music industry’s focus towards digital-first marketing. - **Feminist Influence:** The album also became a cultural touchstone for feminism, particularly in pop music. Beyoncé’s incorporation of feminist ideas into mainstream music, especially with songs like "***Flawless***," helped push feminist discourse further into the public consciousness. - **Genre Evolution:** Musically, _BEYONCÉ_ helped to further blur the lines between genres, incorporating influences from trap, electronic, and alternative R&B. This helped solidify the trend of genre-fluid albums that would come to dominate the 2010s. **Pros of the Album’s Influence:** - The release strategy set a new industry standard, influencing how albums are marketed in the streaming age. - The album contributed to greater representation of feminist themes in mainstream music, fostering a more inclusive cultural dialogue. - It pushed musical boundaries, encouraging other artists to embrace genre-blending and more experimental sounds. **Cons of the Album’s Influence:** - The album's experimental nature might alienate listeners who prefer more structured, traditional pop music. - While the visual elements were groundbreaking, they arguably overshadowed the music itself at times, leading some to question whether the visuals were necessary for the album's impact. ### Conclusion _BEYONCÉ_ is a defining moment in Beyoncé’s career, a bold statement of personal, sexual, and creative freedom. Its strengths lie in its experimental production, fearless exploration of themes like empowerment and vulnerability, and its significant cultural impact. However, its risks don’t always pay off for all listeners— some may find its genre-blending jarring, and its feminist messaging occasionally inconsistent. Ultimately, _BEYONCÉ_ is a triumph of both artistry and marketing, marking Beyoncé as a visionary in both realms. The album stands as a testament to her evolution as an artist, solidifying her status as one of the most influential figures in modern music.

Love it!

i got this album ON Beyoncé’s birthday??? what an amazing coincidence. anyways, there is me before i listened to this album as a teen and there’s after. it truly opened my eyes to feminism, female sexuality and more. my friends and i used to quote the opening skit of Haunted all the time, and we used to have dance parties listening to Drunk In Love and Partition. i think that Lemonade or Renaissance might be better albums, but self-titled will always have a special place in my heart. 4.5

Nice

Highly enjoyable electro funk and R&B masterwork that is a passionate expression of female sexuality and feminist ideas. Drunk in Love, Blow, Partition, XO are all classics now, but also love the D’Angelo-esque Rocket and falsetto No Angel. The production is flawless, the guests are all stars, and Yonce is at the height of her superpowers.

Third self titled album in a row. Queen Bee slays as usual.

Not as good as lemonade, which isn't on this list.

The hype for this album following its' surprise release was legendary. As for the music, yeah, it lives up to the hype. Beyonce's voice is always a treat to listen to, plus the fact that some of these beats are stellar makes a very easy 5 for me.

este álbum no es mejor que el sexo este álbum ES el sexo. really strong 9/10.

Beyonce She makes great cohesive albums that tell stories. I like how she has interesting forms and transitions. Drunk in love is so great. Other favorites are Blow, Haunted, superpower, rocket. Great album but least favorite is the Drake song- I think it’d be better without it.

B was horny asl in 2014. All bangers.

Genius move by the list owner if he's fed me this in line with the release of Cowgirl Carter last week, cause I fucken loved that and was very happy to dive into this. Wishing I paid any attention at all to this in 2014. Interestingly triple j have evolved to playing Beyonce now but weren't at that point in 2014 (at that time triple j was my primary source of new music so this never came across my radar). To be fair 2014 me would've spat the dummy at jjj playing Beyonce anyway. Glad I (or at least my music taste) has got to a point where I can appreciate this without the "I hate all pop without exception" shtick because there honestly isn't a bad song on here. Partition holds up to any heavy hitters of its time (Rocky, Clipping etc), Blow is sexy af, the work on Rocket is perfection. I instinctively want to hate the Drake verse on Mine but even that's pretty good (especially the juxtaposition it brings). XO has got 2014 Kevin Parker/Tame written all over it too - based on this and Cowboy Carter she's a master at capturing the sound of the time and making it absolutely her own.

Easy 5.

Don't come at me but I'd only really heard Beyoncé's radio hits before this, but I still knew she is queen. Even so, I was very surprised how much I enjoyed this album, it was way more atmospheric than I expected (again, after only hearing her radio hits). Her voice is obviously killer. Like Lauryn Hill, I enjoy the storytelling intros to some songs. I liked the backing tracks, they were often grandiose without overshadowing the vocals. Disk 2 has some fun bonus additions but I will be mainly rating the album as Disk 1 from start to finish, as I feel it really wraps up into a perfect little package. Top songs: Pretty hurts Haunted** Partition XO Heaven Blue Ring off

It’s so fitting that we’re listening to this right as Cowboy Carter is released, as this album solidified for many, myself included, that Beyoncé can simply do whatever she wants to and it will end up as magnificent work. That is a testament to Beyoncé’s very apparent insistence and obsession with forming each detail of each track to be exactly how she envisions it alongside her co-conspirators. This album is a fabulous exploration of women’s sexuality, love, insecurity, and confidence. Due credit must be given to Beyoncé for centering and celebrating black female sexuality in particular in mainstream music and hip hop, where the male gaze has historically dominated how we see black women and their bodies. Musically, the album is beautiful, powerful, sensual, electric, and commanding. Bey’s vocals are, as usual, stunning and magnificent. Despite all of the experimentation this album contains and straying a bit away from her previous music, Beyoncé succeeds once again is creating art that can be described as nothing less than iconic. Faves: Pretty Hurts Drunk in Love Blow Partition Rocket XO Flawless (and the remix, of course) Superpower

This is perhaps Beyonce’s horniest album. Surfbord. 🏄‍♀️🏄‍♀️🏄‍♀️🏄‍♀️🏄‍♀️ Drunk in Love Blow Partition Rocket ***Flawless 7/11