1001 Albums Summary

What if devo talked to girls??? 5/5

What bothers me about the Smiths is not Morrisey’s voice or his general shitheadery. What bothers me is that when he sings he sounds like a kid making up his homework on the spot. The 10 seconds of every song without vocals is some of the best music I've ever heard. The Smiths are maybe the objectively best band that I hate. Gonna think about who else fits that category. Probably other Tylore-core bands.

First time ever hearing this full thing. Production is CLEAN AS HELL. Every song was good but Sultans of Swing is the only one that’s memorable, maybe because I’ve heard it a 1000 times.

Have heard this before but it never clicked. Totally clicked this time. Love how an album about isolation starts with sleigh bells. Electioneering feels out of place but thematically, I like how the most straightforward song is alienated on this album about being weird and alienated. Probably closer to a 9/10 for me but 5 stars because who am I to deny thommy

You ever listen to an album 5 times in a day and not get sick of it (teacher I share a classroom with CANNOT relate) Pearl Jam is the best grunge band eat my shorts

Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-it's-fine 2.5/5

Probably could be a 5/5 because the bookend songs are legit some of my favorite of all time. The tracks in the middle are also great, just a little same-y. -1 star for Robert fripps wife’s nipples on instagram

Hey, this guy’s pretty good!

An album that sounds like “I know my time is coming soon also go fuck yourself here’s some of the best music you’ll ever hear”. I have never actively put Johnny Cash on before this listen.

Love The Cure. Every song is exactly the same, but when that singular song is extremely good who cares. we play by AC/DC rules here.

I didn't realize how much Preoccupations singer is biting Bowie until now. All the poppy songs I like on this are rendered redundant by the existence of Talking Heads. When it becomes a spacey freak jazz album I love it

Listen, I know there’s art out there that’s straight up Not For Me, and Beyoncé is the epitome of that. Production pretty immaculate, first few songs I was like oh I get why people are rabid. Then the rest of the album hit and holy shit someone needed to cut this thing down.

Will easily be 5 stars when I revisit it

It insists upon itself.

Every time I listen to capital J "Jazz" i wonder if this will be the listen in which I "get" it. I don't! I play music and I don't really understand what the fuck is happening in jazz, I usually trust that if the jazz I'm hearing has made it to me it has passed several quality checks and must be Important. So I feel weird putting a number on this! I think it moves way more than Kind of Blue, which I've heard way more and bought on vinyl once to look smart. It's probably perfect but I have no way of knowing, so get wrecked, jazz, i guess.

This thing sounds pretty incredible. None of the songs are super sticky but you can tell this is 4-6 very talented people making good music even if there are not very many Good Songs on this record.

Supremely listenable. So much tambourine. These guys got a real future I think

All these songs are in the key of zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (Pretty good I will never listen to this again)

The classic Maiden albums all have 3-5 all time classics, 1-2 hidden gems, then 1-2 whatever songs. For that reason I couldn’t tell you my favorite with a gun to my head. Anyway, this might be my favorite. For a band with some of the strongest album openers ever, it’s wild how mid Invaders is. Children of the Damned is becoming my favorite Maiden tune because it’s just a Judas Priest song. 22 Acacia Avenue always bums me out to think about because the lyrics are so dang dumb but every time I hear it I remember the riffs rule. Prisoner and Gangland are great deep cuts. Title track does sound like the devil is here. Hallowed Be Thy Name is an all timer. Run to the Hills lowkey the best Iron Maiden song (nuclear take, I know) and maybe the best metal hit song ever.

Fun game: imagine dance lyrics but in a turnstile song. There’s no difference. All this shit sounds like Sesame Street (complimentary) if they had an episode teaching kids the answer to the question “what if someone wanted a good beat?” Not nearly enough tambo. Closer to a 2.5 I will likely only revisit one or two songs

Have never heard this whole thing before outside of I Against I and this shit rules. Very weird that mainstream-adjacent punk didn’t take the funk influence from this until more recently.

I think I’m comparing any new-waver-y record in the DEVOxCARS grid. one axis is how weird yet revealing about contemporary culture it is, and the other axis is how much it’s the best pop songwriting you ever heard. This record is pretty exceptionally done but man do I wish I cared about more than 2-3 songs.

Extremely my thing I wish I knew this had existed earlier.

First song - what are these crackers doing Second song - I bet this is Brett Kavanaugh’s favorite band Third song on - (offensive TikTok speech impediment voice) I think I’m starting to like Scritti Politti

Phenomenal. Visions makes me cry. Higher Ground makes me forget the worst band in the world ruined it. Livin for the City is astounding. The rest also great.

I genuinely believe this is the worst bass tone of all time. The Fred Durst feature that devolves into homoeroticism and (very quickly) homophobia is one of the most fascinating pieces of media I’ve ever consumed. All in all, nu-metal bad (all of it) and the current revival of it is pissing me off.

“Hey what’s the name of the album you’re listening to?” Uhhhh don’t worry about it.

Drums and Wires is much better from these guys, and Mayor of Simpleton from the following record is one of the better songs to exist. This one is just kinda fine.

Not my fav metal band, and not my fav album by them. Battery low key sucks! It kinda takes 3 songs for me to like a riff on this thing. There’s no way to know Cliff Burton was a good bassist considering this mix. 5 stars because every metal album I like more is biting this, but lowkey Metallica sucks.

Best riffs on this are the ones you don’t hear in guitar center

Incredibly annoyed that I enjoy the musical stylings of the Rolling Stones.

The title of this record refers to my level of cognitive dissonance between my love for rush and my hatred of Neil Peart’s Randian bullshit on a scale of 1 to 10.

Perfectly made album that I enjoy immensely but it makes me feel absolutely nothing.

the groove of the night is the dance of the heart

“Ice’ll cream your ass like Haagen-Dazs” accidentally very prescient. This shit rules, though I’m eavesdropping at best.

ACAB includes sting, Copeland, and the other one.

Jazz classics automatically get a 3 until I figure out how jazz works.

First time hearing this after years of constantly bumping “You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby”. Love it even though it’s too long and rendered redundant by its successor. Prob closer to a 3.5

First half so good!

Should've named the band John Lydon and the Dumb Idiots

Chop Changes and FX out and it’s perfect. Still perfect though.

My Big 4 ranking: Anthrax (live) Megadeth (recorded) Slayer (4 songs) Ride the Lightning

Remember when Lorde put out the pandemic record about how if you go outside things will be better? This is that but the 70s.

Why are there 17 songs on this. The four that I like really carry it. Wild that this is their best album and it’s still buns.

First Bob I've heard in full. Cannot wait to hear more.

Oh man this sounds like every annoying person I knew in college. Liked it more than I thought.

It’s alright!

I want to go back and give Master of Puppets a 4 because this right here whips its ass.

I hardly know’er land

An uber driver showed me this album 3 years ago. All the basslines are secretly Geezer Butler-esque.

I enjoyed the non-ballads immensely but holy shit it’s HALF BALLADS. Would be excellent with 2 more rockers in lieu of the (well-made) slow jams. Yes I’m aware I’m talking about EAGLES.

Excellent train listen on the way to see John Cena lose at summerslam

Outside of the hits the only song I care about is the 15 minute acid jam about mermaids.

Some of these tracks slap and some of them are well-performed elevator music.

Cinnamon Girl and Down by the River are on this!

If your movie soundtrack works for someone who has never seen the movie it’s perfect.

RIP Ray Charles you would’ve loved Op Ivy

As a low down man from da bayou, this really reminded me of home

Okay maybe I like jazz if it’s not horns?

When you get right down to it, sometimes our minds are all confused with confusion

Yo this would rule if it didn’t sound like Kohl’s. (Good hooks / songwriting but holy shit this sounds like it was recorded directly to Casio keyboard demo mode)

Banger

Wild when the first song is the worst song on the record. Battle of Evermore immediately transports me to the woods. Four Sticks immediately takes me to a dorm room. When the Levee Breaks brings me to a levee.

Very enjoyable despite not being my thing at all. I loved the jazzy ones.

I will likely grow to love this.

Half the non-radio songs are his best songs and the other half are his worst songs.

More like Utterly Uninspiring Company. When this popped up I was worried that “Shooting Star” would be on it, so at least I dodged that mediocre bullet.

-1 for lack of Cold Lampin

Piano rock is so much better without piano

Without this half the music I like doesn’t exist. 3rd track peaked as the plane I was on took off and I ascended into heaven.

Yeah this is on the other end of the spectrum of music made For Me and I think it’s a touch long but the grooves are insane I think I’m pregnant now

Absolutely loved this holy shit

AND THE FORTY THIEVES

Am I missing something? Very run of the mill

Music to leave your kid next to a window to

Once I was in the car with my parents and “Closer” came on. My mom and I simultaneously went “oh great song! Turn it off” then had to explain why we didn’t want to listen to it with each other to my dad, who got angry at the lyrics. I miss being 27. All the synths are unique and the production is some of the most rewarding stuff I've ever heard. Every few songs there's a bass guitar, acoustic guitar, piano, or non-fuzzed out guitar that adds a weird human touch that makes the rest of it more powerful.

The decision to hit the same moog pedal note so many times in quick succession during Tom Sawyer is legitimately baffling.

This was too enjoyable, dude should stick to making uninteresting cartoon music.

Okay I enjoyed this much more than I thought. Loved it most when it was white-washed soul/country skronks as opposed to Elvis-y ballads. As a white boy bassist who's parts occasionally cosplay as funk lines, I clocked this bassist as a gringo 30 seconds in.

I feel like we’ve been getting fed a lot of country lately, which I appreciate because my feelings on the genre are starting to crystallize. I like how a lot of pop country really hits the “setup-punchline” structure between the verses and choruses. the title always clicks on the first or last line of the chorus and it’s usually funny or at least clever. I dislike the hyper produced country like this where the bass sounds synthesized and compressed to hell. You can also totally hear the auxiliary players like mandolin and fiddle waiting to play in between each verse line. This specific record was whatever until he got to talking about Dixie. Fuck that so hard.

I enjoyed this a lot! Good vibes wish more songs stuck out to me.

The non-singles really hit for me this time. As far as singles go, The Unforgiven fucking rules. overall, Metallica is so important and I straight up do not like them. you can hear them (Lars) sweating to make it work.

This can easily jump up to 5 one day.

So good but so long

Pregnancy count for this journey: 2

UGHHHHHHHH

Classic “pretty enjoyable album” that you’d find in a yard sale from an old person who didn’t really like music

Heard future shades of of Montreal, Oingo Boingo, and Primus. I enjoyed the whole listen while only really liking one actual song (creepy clock man or whatever it’s called). Tambo on 80% of this.

I love Octopus but honestly the rest of this is quite bad. Idk if that’s a nuclear take but I was extremely disappointed with this.

Just undeniable

Some undeniable bangers here. Some sick cuts I never heard before as well so I’m glad I’ve finally heard this. All that said there are also several absolute stinkers. Liberian Girl should be the 7th song on a Police album not the fourth song on one of the most acclaimed artist of all time’s record. Man in the Mirror starts the outro no joke 2.5 minutes into a 5 minute song. Embarrassing that I’ve heard Fat by Weird Al and the AAF cover of Smooth Criminal far more times than the originals.

Lexicon devil goated

This is cool and had no idea it existed. I feel like I'm listening to a video essay with incredible beats underneath.

Motörhead is a 4 star band with 3 star albums.

The cartoon thing annoys me so much

Extremely proud of myself that I did not recognize that a song from this is on Shrek. Shrek sucks we have to stop pretending it’s a nostalgic classic. All Star is a phenomenal song though. Eels is fine I wonder if these guys know they don’t have to arpeggiate every chord.

Ex girlfriend music (non -derogatory) but also we need to stop the 1975-ification of music

Enjoyable but I imagine both Yoshimi and Soft Bulletin are on this list, so why is this here?

Is there a 3rd alt hip-hop entity starting with the letters D-E-L with a song about how you need to stop stinking?

Enjoyed more than I thought. At its best when it's Dollar Store Quadrophenia. Queen is a classic "great musicians with very few good songs".

muddy waters - good drag name? Prob not my place to suggest that.

Needs more Left Eye. Very pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed this.

Hmm

Nuclear take - this is mid. Led Zep is at their least compelling when they are just playing (stealing) the blues. They do it well! I don't care though! When they get a lil kooky with it is where they really shine. The only song on this record that doesn't make me pine for subsequent Zep is "Your Time Is Gonna Come". This record is a 3 in my heart but a 4 in my brain.

“Do You Compute” automatically comes out of me when an audio engineer says “okay let’s hear some bass”

Yes the ultimate 4 star band with moments of 5 star energy

This causes me immense psychic trauma as a man who is simultaneously afraid of intimacy and obsessed with James Jamerson’s basslines.

Perfectly fine, well made, well written songs. It's just lacking that UMPH.

First 3 tracks incredible. Immediately loses steam for the whole B side of disc one. Picks it back up in the third quarter and closes out strong with some good ol country skronkin.

On top of absolutely honking, this album has the best Wikipedia article I’ve ever read.

Randomly chose to listen to this on my own months ago and I dig it!

Okay I get it now.

Never heard OF this before. Absolutely rocked my ass off. Dude is going CRAZY with the cowbell on the title track.

Something something dead duck

Goes down smooth

I've said it before and I'll say it again, JPJ owns this record. Similar to LZIV, the opener is the worst song on the album (complimentary). Just realized I'm completely ripping off Ramble On in the Jeffs.

Yeah turns out I like prince a lot

This would be 5 stars if it came out 10 years later. I think with a full Reagan term under their belts the social commentary would come out better but this is truly one of the better proto-punk albums I’ve heard.

Judas Priest is secretly my favorite metal band. I grew up with my mom blasting them in their car and they were part of the first metal show I ever saw (along with Testament, Motorhead, and Dio-led Sabbath). Even on the Nostradamus tour JP absolutely brought it. Their whole deal has aged better than Iron Maiden's (less problematic history, more hot rockin'). Rapid Fire and Steeler are great proto-thrash song (singular on purpose - it's the same song). Metal Gods and Grinder are good steady jams. Living After Midnight is the best hair metal song. Breaking the Law is punk less in it's subject matter but more in its recognition that crime happens when society fails to meet your needs. The Rage is such an oddball and an absolute ripper. You Don't Have to Be Old to Be Wise is here too (and it's good). Even United and Red, White, and Blue can't mar this perfect record (and honestly I love those goofy-ass songs). Rob Halford is the coolest dude ever and he still sounds great live.

This album would be much worse if Fred Durst did not becoming capital I Interesting in the past few years.

Only recently came to the correct realization that Bruce is the best. Go see him, seriously. This album is exactly what I DON'T need from Bruce. Gimme the E-Street Band. My favorite songs are the ones that boogie a lil' bit (assuming I will like the Electric Nebraska versions more when it drops tomorrow).

While "Fragile" has higher highs and contains my literal favorite song of all time (guess which one) this is maybe the best Yes record front to back? Still has the bizarre sequencing issues of much early prog but absolutely honks.

Simultaneously objectively good while being a thing I cannot be bothered to care about.

Have heard maybe 3 tracks from this before. Never clocked until today that Beck's thing is just hip hop with rock aesthetics and sensibilities. Pretty cool! Love the first half, starts to drag in the back. Update listened second time and was kinda over it.

This should probably be the only Motorhead inclusion on this whole list. Gives you more bangers than any of their individual recorded works, and sounds quite good. Assuming Lemmy overdubbed the vox in the studio because he sounds incredible.

All good and heartfelt and meaningful and I was eavesdropping the entire time. The two tracks that piqued my interest were The Bottle and H20Gate Blues.

Why isn’t the Halloween theme on this? 0 stars

Call this a double yellow line because it's middle of the road and brother you do not want to cross it.

Absolute banger, have heard most of it on the radio but the non radio songs kinda absolutely rip

Every song I didn't love was under 3 minutes long.

The dancey tracks hit and the ballads do not.

Super duper solid if samey.

Don’t tell high school me but I love Elvis Costello.

Honestly super enjoyable but bloated even at 45 minutes. Nothing world shattering but I could imagine this being a great live show in the 90s.

Lowkey the longest half hour of my life and I don’t necessarily mean that in a bad way.

I wish the autobahn was real

First time listening to this and it rules. The sticky songs are sticking and the others are not but I will grow to appreciate them.

Was half asleep and only saw the colors/style of the title on the album cover and got super excited. Cosmo and Wanda, you ain't slick.

I definitely appreciate this one more than I like it. Guitar work is great.

Every song is the same but half of them have a fun synth. There’s only 2 or 3 songs I’d lose off this thing, and I’d maybe cut a minute of fade out out of the others, but honestly had a blast listening to this.

Donkey Kong Country-ass Music (complimentary)

Wow this was great I wonder what some of her other song-WHAT IS THAT ONE CALLED????

I’m the closest thing this group has to a resident Dead Head and I’m here with the novel take of: the live stuff is better.

There's a straight line from this record coming out to Roe v. Wade getting overturned.

Why’s she sound like that

If the worst song on your record is Smoke on the Water you’re in pretty good shape.

Gets better when it gives up any pretense of rocking.

Thought they were French the whole time. The fact that they’re not bumps them up a star.

2 piece bands are bullshit

I get it now

This was my number 5 album on Spotify wrapped this year.

Accidentally listened to the first half without my subwoofer plugged in. Turns out low end is important. I prefer Bruce throwing a million parties instead of just like one or two

I’m the mayor of jam city

Phil Spector talking about the magic of Christmas at the end low key ruins this

This project is making me like the Stones which is honestly pissing me off

Love the songs in the first half, get less interested as it gets more experimental but this is absolutely Me Music.

I’ve got a bike

Maybe my favorite REM???

Unlike the other album by them we got, this one has SONGS

Rewatched the Big Lebowski this summer and my new favorite joke in it is when the Dude’s car gets trashed and they cut to them driving without a windshield eating burgers and listening to Oye Como Va.

Aerosmith annoys but I think there’s some great tracks on here.

Yo good job making your music interesting! What if you also made it good???

Fascinating thing that exists

Have heard this before and did not care about it. It clicked this time!

I find Jane’s Addiction to be an incredibly confusing band. It’s like cock rock made by artsy weirdos. Love this record.

Never made it through a full Smashing Pumpkins album, but it clicked this time!

Very fun jam record

Hot take: second half of the title track is kinda not good

This has some of Kiss's best songs while being an extremely mid album. Detroit Rock City, King of the Nighttime World, God of Thunder, and Shout it Out Loud all RULE and every other song is total cheeks.

Perfectly fine and incredibly lame

Dude just shut up for like 5 seconds

Not my favorite 80s punk record

No tambo?

Such a cool record

Good but sloggish

More soul than rock

My bit for years has been I’m Cajun because my parents (for some reason) told me I was conceived in New Orleans. I’m genuinely more from the bayou than John Fogerty, so I have the authority to say (do declare) he’s an honorary bayou-man. I’m so well adjusted.

Did you know that societal problems are bad?

Listened to the clean version by accident. It’s like a wizard cast a spell on me so I couldn’t even HEAR that one word.

The world would be 10% better if everyone (snob-sogynists and swifties alike) agreed that Taylor’s music is immaculate pop (and nothing deeper)

A five star band that puts out 4 star albums with moments of 10 star excellence. Once in a job interview I was asked what my favorite song of all time is. I opened my mouth and out of nowhere I said Roundabout. The interviewer then googled the lyrics and apparently liked them enough to give me a job. I was an extremely okay camp counselor.

Wild how an album could be this good and contain none of my 10 favorite Bruce songs.