Jul 29 2024
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1984
Van Halen
I have heard jump too many god damn times man for real the sound of that synth makes me feel like I’m at the Somme.
Panama was used as psychological warfare for a reason. Another song I would enjoy much more if I hadn’t heard it eighty billion times.
This album is the sex offenders anthem. Hot for teacher is the best song on this album if you just don’t pay any attention to the lyrics.
Never heard I’ll wait but it was a refreshing intermission before a return to sex offender anthems.
Guitar work is pretty good but if you’re listening to this album 40 years after it’s come out it’s hardly gonna be revolutionary compared to things you’ve been listening to all your life. Probably goes way harder in 1984 when the sickest riff you’ve ever heard is something those hacks from kiss put out and the idea of consent was a lot more loosely defined.
3
Jul 30 2024
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Thriller
Michael Jackson
Groovy ass opening beat. There’s just something inherently fruity about Michael’s vocals. Sounds like he’s saying you’re a vegetable. Guitar solo in wanna be starting something goes crazy. What is with the hee hee shit he always does I’ve never understood it. Maybe child abuse is justified if it produces singers like Michael. Baby be mine is such a floaty little pop tune. Paul McCartney feature hit me like a freight train what da heck. This shit must have blown up the charts. Tfw little Michael steals your gf….
First certified banger arrives. Pretty ballsy to just make a song about ghouls and jam it in the middle of your album full of standard pop fare. I was not aware beat it was from the same album as thriller man MJ was fucking cooking on this one. The guitar on this track shreds but I can’t stop thinking about the weird al version of this song. Holy shit 3 bangers in a row!!!! Back to sex music I suppose. Thank you Michael. PYT slaps I think this is my favourite track on this album. So groovy. There’s gotta be a pedophile joke in here somewhere. Man that was a good ass album, not a single dud track. No one that makes music that good could possibly diddle kids. Maybe Michael should have made a song about how he doesn’t diddle kids. Thank you Joe Jackson for beating talent out of this child!!
5
Jul 31 2024
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Can't Buy A Thrill
Steely Dan
For the longest time I thought he said man who stole your wallet. This is real smoking inside the house on a leather couch music. The guitar work in do it again is so fucking TIGHT man god damn. I have spent so much time drunkenly singing this. Really humanises tony soprano. Possibly one of the best songs about cucking somebody. The other side of the coin to mister bright side.
I think this is the most underrated song on the album and my personal favourite. Really big fan of the vocal harmonies on this one. Another drunken classic.
Midnite cruiser aka the drunk driving song. Many lamp posts narrowly missed trying to light a cigarette while driving around with the headlights off to this song. Instrumentally every song on this album is perfect.
Must acquire white stetson hat….
Reelin in the years is the first steely Dan song I ever heard and it really embodies the general vibe of their music as dadcore midlife crisis music which is wild considering this album came out when my own dad was maybe 9.
Fire in the hole is the worst song on this album and it’s still serviceable as a track which really demonstrates how fucking good this album is.
Now is he talking about Brooklyn the location or Brooklyn being the name of a person.
Overall good ass album and anthem of scumbags everywhere. Just personal preference but it’s a little front loaded with bangers
5
Aug 01 2024
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Gunfighter Ballads And Trail Songs
Marty Robbins
Patrolling the Mojave really makes you wish for a nuclear winter…
Big Iron is an absolute masterclass of western musical storytelling. Beautiful harmonies. Really wish this song hadn’t been memed to death.
Songs that are completely unrelatable to the post GFC listener. Wish I had 160 acres in any valley. Just a comfy little tune about livin a simple life. Truly love this track.
Old timey country musicians really sang about their impending execution a lot.
This album really has some beautiful vocal harmonies.
Huge fan of Strawberry Roan. Worlds most retarded horse easily defeats alleged master horse breaker. Paints a really good picture in this song of this janky as fuck old bastard horse. Just lovely storytelling.
Masters Call is another fantastic ballad massive fan of this biblical fuck you for being an evil bandit. On the flip side it’s really funny to think of Jesus Christ just exploding cattle with lightning.
Running gun is a real jaunty break from the slower paced songs that make up most of this album. Jumpy little guitar tune.
Saddle tramp another classic banger.
El Paso is a fantastic track. First heard it on cassette or something on this big fuck off stereo my uncle had at my grandparents house when I was like 8. This is one of my favourite country albums for sure. Most of the songs are short and sharp and don’t hang around too long. Nice little stories, there are a few tracks that are a bit forgettable but for the most part it’s a classic.
4
Aug 02 2024
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Reggatta De Blanc
The Police
This is the only song I’ve heard on this album. Such a classic. I may have heard it a touch too many times but it’s got such a catchy hook.
Reggatta de Blanc itself sounds like a retarded man having sex for the first time. What are these vocals. Good ass instrumental though.
Bring on the night just kind of a meh song. Don’t really like stings voice that much. Also not a really huge fan of the sound of the guitar generally. It’s well played i just think I don’t really like the effect.
After this point I sorta got bored of the album. It’s not really bad music it’s just boring as fuck. The police always sort of were a band I never really understood why people liked so much. Like they have their real standout bangers like message in a bottle, Roxanne etc that were the big hits but this album is sort of a “eh” aside that. I listened to this again to try and see if I just wasn’t in the right mentality but I just couldn’t get into it and think I actually disliked it more on a second listen. It’s just boring. I don’t think the average person could name a single song on this album besides message in a bottle. No time at all sorta revives the tail end with a nice up tempo sorta classic rock track but the vocals have this weird effect on them that I fucking hate and it also has the classic trope of not knowing how to finish a song so just fading out. I looked back and the song is called no time this time so shows how memorable it is that I got the name wrong 3 seconds after I listened to it. ACAB Includes sting. Have a less gay haircut.
1
Aug 05 2024
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Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
Arctic Monkeys
All the tracks on this album have obnoxiously long names. I bet the guy who wrote this album LOVES the smell of his own farts.
First track was ok I guess. Nothing special.
Second song has a lovely opening riff.
I've sorta tuned out the lyrics a bit due to a natural audio filter for British accents but whenever I tune back in I hear the gayest lyrics man.
I enjoy the song "When the sun goes down" but other than that I really have no strong feelings about this album one way or another. It's just ok. I enjoy the instrumentation but it's balanced by having lyrics that sound like they were written by a teenage who thinks wearing a leather coat to school is cool. Only like two memorable tracks for me.
2
Aug 06 2024
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Songs Of Leonard Cohen
Leonard Cohen
This was a real slog to get through man holy shit what a boring fucking album. This guy seriously sounds like he has had too much sleepytime tea and he’s dozing off as he’s singing his gay little poetry. I sorta drifted through this until I heard a track that made my ears perk up and I was like damn! This one is kinda good but it sounds really different. Looked at my phone and Spotify had auto played a Beatles track. Overall I’m sure this album has some sort of musical merit but I have untreated ADHD so I fucking hated it.
1
Aug 07 2024
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At Fillmore East
The Allman Brothers Band
You know I really don’t have much to say about the individual songs on this album as they kinda just blended together like it was one big jam sesh. I’m not usually a fan of live albums especially from this era just because the audio quality is usually dog ass terrible but this one was pretty damn good. Whipping post sorta stuck in my head a bit more but that might just be cause it was the last track. It’s just good blues, good instrumentation, but like a lot of these older albums they’re fundamentally different listened to with a brain full of micro plastics off an iPhone, compared to if they had been listened to on a hifi system with a fucked needle with a brain full of lead byproducts and LSD. Nothing I’d go out of my way to listen to but good music nonetheless.
3
Aug 08 2024
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Slippery When Wet
Bon Jovi
YEA BABY BACK TO SEX OFFENDER MUSIC!!! IVE WAITED TOO LONG!!!
Never listened to anything beyond Bon Jovi’s hits - his non hit music is the same shit really, just less catchy hooks to the same overdriven power chords and basic but groovy basslines.
Gotta say let it rock got my feet tapping. The lyrics may as well be absent except for the element having a vocal track adds to the song. Creative complexity of finger painting. Really just music for fucking to. Man cunts in the 80s just did not know how to end songs. Just do a hard stop instead of fading out like a coward for real. We’re on the first hit now. More songs about fucking, an age old classic. You give love a bad name is obviously a hit and I’ve heard it so many times from a makita site radio being back announced by Dave and fucko before more chat about FOOTY. Fading out again like a coward for real man one of these songs needs to have an actual ending.
This album is a bit of a hits album I was not aware livin on a prayer was on this too. Hearing this gives me flashbacks to drinking a lukewarm ice coffee on a concrete slab at some sort of industrial facility while some retarded tradesman talks about how much he hates paying tax. I really like the bassline in livin in a prayer. It’s so damn groovy. Bring back fucked up overdrive guitars. A relic of the 80s that has sadly gone out of fashion along with CFC hairspray and lead paint.
So this song literally starts with sex noises. Random brass section kinda helps. I really can’t say anything bad about this music man. It might be music for fucking retards but I am proudly retarded.
See they actually ended love is a social disease properly. No more fade outs.
I am envisioning scooby doo 2 motorcycle jousting as soon as I hear that guitar sting. It permeates my brain like so much black mould.
Raise your hands was eh. Without love slightly better. I feel like we’re getting into filler territory. Okay so Jon Bon Jovi was 24 in 1986 so this motherfucker is singing about prom 6 years after he would have graduated what a fuckin dork lmao. MFs at UQ talking about what OP they got in 4th year. Overall this album has some fuckin heaters, and some songs that could generously be described as filler. I liked this album, music by retards, for retards.
4
Aug 09 2024
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Searching For The Young Soul Rebels
Dexys Midnight Runners
Why is this literal one hit wonder band included on a list of 1001 albums you MUST listen to? Is it for contrast, so that there are some lows to balance the highs against?
This is the auditory equivalent of porridge made with water and nothing else.
It really is damning that 3/5 of the top listened to tracks from Dexy’s Midnight Runners are just variations of “Come on Eileen”, a song that itself is just “okay”.
I was already begging for this to be over by the third song so I could go and listen to literally anything else.
The brass sections make me think I’m listening to ska music, but at least ska has that weird manic energy going on while the guys in cheap suits do weird dance moves. This is just slow, boring, and the lead singer sounds like he has a traumatic brain injury. It’s like a guy with Down’s syndrome trying to imitate Bryan Ferry.
I just cannot imagine any scenario where I would go out of my way to listen to this.
1
Aug 12 2024
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Guero
Beck
Originally I thought that Beck was a character made up for that one Futurama episode where Bender becomes a folk musician.
I really enjoyed this album. I don’t think there’s much on there that I can single out. I’ve listened to the album like 4 times since it came up for review and each time I’ve been doing something else while I’ve been listening so I’ve not really noted the names of the particular songs. There’s a lot of variety here and in a good way. The song blend together to give it cohesion as an album but they’re all fairly different in their own ways. E-Pro and Girl were the big standouts for me and have been absolute earworms. Straight into the liked playlist when I heard them.
Had a really weird moment discussing this album on Friday night and hearing a song playing on the bar speakers which coincidentally was also a Beck song which I found out after asking the bartender. I liked this album.
4
Aug 13 2024
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Lady Soul
Aretha Franklin
If every white boy was forced to listen to this album racism would not exist.
I have been walking around the house singing these certified ear worms all day.
There are no bad songs on this album.
I swear allegiance to Aretha Franklin. Let any who besmirch the name of the Queen of Soul (PBUH) suffer before my blade!
5
Aug 14 2024
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Forever Changes
Love
I’d never heard of this band before this, I really enjoy this first track. Reminds me of something I can’t quite place but I know I quite like. Really enjoy where they get a bit flamenco with it. Sort of has a bit of a Jethro Tull with less flutes sound. Quite enjoy the guitar on andmoreagain. I get it now, it sounds like King Crimson. Very similar tones. Some of the guitar on this album is a real treat. This is good music but it sorta wears out it’s welcome for me a bit closer to the end. Not bad is what I’d say.
3
Aug 15 2024
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Sister
Sonic Youth
Is this deliberately trying to sound like shit? Whoever mixed and mastered this album should be shot behind a woodshed. Some tracks on this are genuinely hard to listen to. Like there are some actual glimmers of good riffs and stuff in here but they’re deafening while the vocals are tuned so low it sounds like they’re in the next room singing through the wall. I actually thought my headphones were broken on a couple of these tracks because I had gotten one of the EarPods wet the other day, but I listened to something else when the album was done and it sounded fine so I guess the album just sounds like that.
1
Aug 16 2024
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Merriweather Post Pavilion
Animal Collective
Why the fuck this adventure time background soundtrack ass music got me cryin in the club
4
Aug 19 2024
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The Queen Is Dead
The Smiths
I genuinely resent that I enjoyed this album.
I hate the smiths, morrisey is such an insufferable fuckwit. The lyrical content of these songs is absolute dog ass garbage. I really wanted to be vindicated and for this album to be fucking terrible.
However, it would be totally disingenuous of me to review this poorly. Musically, this is fantastic. Phenomenally composed music. Morrissey’s singing voice honestly isn’t even that bad. I just tuned out what he was saying (gay faggot retard incel poetry dumbass garbage) and just vibes with the actual music.
The only times I didn’t enjoy this album is when I briefly became aware of what he was actually saying and got the same feeling you do when you are halfway through eating something and notice it’s mouldy.
4
Aug 20 2024
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Bad
Michael Jackson
I was very excited for another BANGER from little Michael but I can’t help but feel a bit disappointed with this one after hearing thriller first. The highs of this one like Bad, Way you make me feel, and smooth criminal still stick out as absolute slappers, but some of the tracks that fill out this album range from forgettable to bad, with the highlight of what the fuck is this being “Liberian Girl”, or as I like to call it, “How to contract new and interesting diseases”.
It would be interesting to plot how insane Michael was, and how fucked up he looked against the quality of his albums. Should have stopped with the surgeries after thriller.
3
Aug 21 2024
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Cypress Hill
Cypress Hill
You wake up to the warm afternoon glow of the California sun streaming through the fucked up venetian blinds of your filthy green waste smelling apartment. You look at the clock, it’s 3pm.
“Dios mio” you say as you look at the stain on your carpet. You’ve knocked your bong over in your sleep and the rancid water is currently seeping into your carpet. You grab the lukewarm half drunk forty ounce of malt liquor from your nightstand, take a swig, and shoo the flies away from the room temperature white castle that’s been sitting on your coffee table all night. Need that fuel before you go to the studio. You drive downtown in your extremely modified continental, the most expensive thing you own by a huge margin, and get into the studio, you spit out a chunk of black mucus and prep your nasally voice for a hard day of recording, but first you flip a coin, today will I rap about smoking weed, or killing people? You spend ten minutes in the studio saying the n word way more than someone of your complexion should be. You sink into some sort of bean bag chair. What a hard days work, time for a cone.
This album is cypress hills worst. They have good beats but the songs are nigh indistinguishable from each other. The rage version of I could just kill a man is better. This album goes on for too long.
2
Aug 22 2024
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The Healer
John Lee Hooker
I wonder why this was chosen from all of John Lee Hookers fairly prolific discography. I can’t really identify any of the tracks on this one as being big hits. Some really big names featuring here. Very surprised to see Carlos Santana on the opening track.
This album doesn’t have any bad songs per say, just none that really stand out for me. I would have enjoyed this album more if I was drunk as fuck in a dark, dirty dive bar where you can smoke inside.
3
Aug 23 2024
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A Date With The Everly Brothers
The Everly Brothers
Is your favourite meal dry white toast?
Do you wash it down with lukewarm tap water?
Do you only have sex in the missionary position solely for the purpose of procreation?
Well THIS is the album for you!
Painfully bland music in a genre that’s been done better even by the contemporaries of this group. Why is this a must listen? These guys can’t be that influential as I’ve literally never heard of them before. This is just boring sixties white people radio pop.
1
Aug 26 2024
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Paul's Boutique
Beastie Boys
An interesting treatise from professors emeritus Dr. Michael D. Phd., Dr. ADROCK Phd., and Dr. MCA Md., which asks such thought provoking questions as: which ethnicity of woman in New York is the baddest, What would happen if I threw eggs through the windows of passing cars, and perhaps the most novel question of all, is it possible to sound any more Jewish?
4
Aug 27 2024
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Kid A
Radiohead
What a drag this album was. There are the inklings of good ambient music here. I can’t really positively review Merriweather post pavilion and then say I hated this, because they have sort of a similar feeling. Again like weird adventure time sad moment background music. But Tom Yorke has such a mewling annoying voice on this album and 90% of the time he sounds like he’s trying to sing while sucking off megatron. I liked optimistic.
2
Aug 28 2024
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The Good, The Bad & The Queen
The Good, The Bad & The Queen
Half these tracks are one MF DOOM feature away from being on demon days.
When I saw this is a Damon Albarn side project I immediately assumed it would be forty minutes of the sounds of an Englishman wanking into his own mouth, however, I quite enjoyed this album. It really just feels like titular album/demon days era Gorillaz b sides that sneak into the slow part at the end of the album after the jaunty hits are out of the way.
Vocals are pretty good and the instrumental work was pretty great.
Overall this is a bit of a homebrand gorillaz but I enjoyed it. It’s another puzzler of “Why is this album on this list?” Because while it’s a good listen I’ve never heard of it before and I don’t really know anyone else who probably would have. This is a high 3 for me. Nearly scraped into 4 by a hair but I don’t know that I’d really go back to many of these tracks.
3
Aug 29 2024
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Nighthawks At The Diner
Tom Waits
One hour and thirteen minutes of Tom Waits doing his best impression of a sleazy nightclub piano man.
I can see why some people would REALLY hate this album because it basically sounds like 73 minutes of drunken rambling over a bluesy jazz band and piped in audience noises.
HOWEVER
I massively enjoyed listening to this album. The whole time I was just wishing I was in some dimly lit club where you can smoke indoors, plastered on cheap whiskey with several women who are definitely on amphetamines (diet pills).
I have a bad habit of sort of tuning out what’s actually being said in music a lot of the time and more focus on the sound and rhythm of the vocals over the lyrical content, and I enjoy Tom Waits gravelly voice crooning along to that smooth ass instrumental. When I did tune into the vocals they were kinda funny. My bitch wife type content.
In summary if I were Tom Waits I would have named all my albums things like “for the bus” so the album read Tom Waits for the bus.
4
Aug 30 2024
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The La's
The La's
Every second day with this list I find myself asking: why this album? What about THIS specific album is soooo special that it went on the 1001 MUST LISTENS?
Like it’s not terrible music, but I just can’t imagine anyone going out of their way to listen to this. It’s just a nothing record. I feel like I have nothing to say about it really. The only impression it left was of something that would be jammed between midnight oil and REM on a triple M midday bracket. It’s like if you asked ai to make safe radio rock. I just know there’s some Gen X loser who thinks this is the best album of all time which makes me sick.
I stress again this isn’t bad or unlistenable. It’s just background noise. It’s on the radio in a shoe store when you’re buying new joggers for school.
The only reason I’m not giving this album a 1 for basically being uninteresting white noise is because I did pick up my phone to see what song was on when Clean Prophet came on.
The biggest crime here is this absolute non event taking up a slot that could have been filled by something more interesting.
2
Sep 02 2024
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Superfly
Curtis Mayfield
Fat white boys form Logan upon listening to this album:
https://youtu.be/7few4tKonWw?si=yunPj-mXZ5yyw3r6
3
Sep 03 2024
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Machine Head
Deep Purple
I was real ambivalent going into this one as my main knowledge of Deep Purple is as baby’s first guitar lesson of having to play Smoke on the Water for 38 straight music lessons cause my class was full of retards who didn’t pay attention and just fucked around while the teacher cried in the corner, and we therefore never progressed to anything more complicated (I was also fucking around).
I am however immediately greeted by goated track Highway star (what plays in a truckies head when the goey hits on the Rockhampton to Brisbane run). Very nice frenetic pace, groovy tune, no one ever listened to deep purple for the vocals but I don’t mind em.
Maybe I’m a Leo, or things to say when the chick you were talking to didn’t like the first star sign you said. Going into this track the drums were very forward. Really enjoy them, nice little walking riff. I really have never listened to much of Deep Purple. Probably should have.
This is a much bluesier track. Not enough bands have a keyboard going on these days. Or maybe too many.
Very odd tonal shift to pictures of home which I can only assume is about freezing to death on a mountain? Maybe I’m hearing the lyrics wrong. Pretty groovy track though.
Kinda snoozing in never before. More of the same competent rock nothin special. Having said that though this coming out in 1972 the way they have the guitars tuned up etc is obviously such a massive influence on the next 20 odd years of rock this was probably still a hit at the time.
And now the main event of songs with very recognisable riffs that I’ve heard far too many times to enjoy properly. I can’t hear that riff without thinking of year 8 music fuckwits using the schools cheap guitar strings to flick rulers and pencils and shit across the room like a bow and arrow. Honestly wish this wasn’t the big deep purple song cause even on this album they have better tracks.
Speaking of better tracks the keyboard on the intro to Lazy is an immediate highlight for this album. Head moving feet jumping immediately. This one is going straight to the pool room (liked songs list). This songs lyrical content is how I’m trying to be. Love a good blues breakdown finish on a track (heroes actually finish songs instead of fading out like a coward).
Last couple of tracks are probably on the weaker side. Didn’t really spark any sort of interest but I like the vibe of space truckin
Good album
4
Sep 04 2024
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Tellin’ Stories
The Charlatans
The entire time I was listening to this I had two major distractions. The first is the ridiculous way the keyboard player died, which I kept thinking of throughout, the second is the guy on the left of the album cover. He is menacing. He looks like he is about to mug me at a train station. Has the FASD stare.
I didn’t like this. I don’t like Britpop. I gave up halfway through the album midway through the chore of a track that was you’re a big girl now. I was going to just mark this as did not listen, but I went back and listened to the tail end of the album. I’m sure you can consider this technically competent music but I do not like it. It is boring. I do not like the vocals. It is discount oasis. I am baffled why this is a MUST LISTEN. Please just let the next album be something I’m surprised by. I don’t even have to like it just make it interesting. So many random nothingburger slogs.
1
Sep 06 2024
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D.O.A. the Third and Final Report of Throbbing Gristle
Throbbing Gristle
who up throbbing they gristle
1
Sep 09 2024
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I Should Coco
Supergrass
Rightio chaps we’ve just about finished our 1990s Britpop album of songs that sound borderline identical, I think somethings missing though… Any ideas?
How about a couple of slower acoustic tracks to show off our year 11 guitar class instrumental chops?
Great idea Gaz! Studio says we need one more track though.
How about one where we put a weird pitch up on the vocal track so we sound like pubescent Alvin and the chipmunks?
Oh that’s a cracker idea Mick! That’s a wrap on this one fellas, pass the ketamine
2
Sep 10 2024
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Getz/Gilberto
Stan Getz
The worst thing about this album is that it’s over so soon.
If you described this as waiting room music or elevator music then sure boss’s nova is pretty subdued, but I wish they’d actually play it in waiting rooms because this album just flies past. You start listening then you look down and it’s been 40 minutes.
A balm to my Britpop damaged ears.
5
Sep 12 2024
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At San Quentin
Johnny Cash
I’ve listened to both the deluxe and standard versions of this album. What a phenomenal set.
My favourite part of this album is where he sings a song shit talking San Quentin and the crowd goes nuts and demands he sing it again.
Johnny Cash possibly one of the best to ever do it. The crowd work is insanely good both from Johnny and from the other musicians involved in this set. Special mention to June Carter riling the inmates up.
5
Sep 13 2024
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Palo Congo
Sabu
I don’t have much to say about this. It’s great music but it doesn’t really strike me as above and beyond anything else I’ve heard in the genre. I’d say this is another inclusion of albums that inspired genres that have since been outdone by those that came after them. Sorta made me think of what would be on the radio in some South American tiki bar before the CIA get in a gunfight with the local security forces.
3
Sep 16 2024
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Stankonia
OutKast
This is a competent album that is 100% carried by its hits. Obviously interludes aside most of these tracks are at best filler, and at worst fucking awful garbage. And by that I mean the song “I’ll call B4 I cum” which I want to scrub from my brain with a sandblaster. A true piece of shit.
Anyway there are 4 GREAT Tracks in an hour and thirteen minutes.
What an odd name for an album.
3
Sep 17 2024
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Back To Black
Amy Winehouse
If Amy Winehouse could hold her liquor she would have faded into obscurity long ago.
2
Sep 18 2024
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Go Girl Crazy
The Dictators
The sound here does exactly what it says in the Spotify artist description. Clearly influential to a lot of punk acts but kind of hit or miss, fortunately the misses were okay rather than bad. The riffs on next big thing were real fun and the writing is silly and fun throughout. Cars and Girls was the worst song on the album because while I can only assume it’s a parody of Beach Boy—esque music it still sounds like the Beach boys.
3
Sep 19 2024
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What's That Noise?
Coldcut
These tracks probably went so crazy while you were K-holing in the bathroom of some scungy Brixton rave in 1990.
Music can be a nice time capsule for an era, but electronic music especially does this in how delineated sounds and trends are between different sub genres and movements. You hear this shit and you think 90s British house.
I listened to a few tracks from these guys on Spotify before listening to the whole non cleared sample album on YouTube and even without having heard anything from this specific artist the influence these guys have had on their genre is absolutely immense. That rave piano sound is so iconic to dance house around this era of music that you could pick any song adjacent to this era and you’d hear something trying to follow that sound trend.
This isn’t my favourite type of EDM but man if I didn’t appreciate this, it felt like listening to a history lesson, and while a lot of these “influential at the time” albums don’t really age well compared to modern fare this one really holds up.
Special mention to “Stop this Crazy thing” definite contender for favourite track on this album.
4
Sep 20 2024
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Kimono My House
Sparks
The blokes who made this album look like they eat human flesh. I couldn’t quite place their ethnicity either even though they look kind of white. I’ll need to research their genealogy to find the appropriate slurs to call them…
I know I’m not enjoying an album when I’m constantly checking to see how far through I am. I had reasonably high hopes after the first track but the album took a nosedive in the category of being interesting after that. This album feels like if you told an ai to generate an album that sounds like the 80s. I did not care for it.
2
Sep 23 2024
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The College Dropout
Kanye West
Gay-Z and cockefeller records never imagined when they signed Kanye just how schizophrenic he would become.
A real time display of the failures of the American mental health system. Thank you Ronald Reagan for closing all the insane asylums, without you Kanye would have been safely locked away in some inpatient facility and never let anywhere near a recording booth.
I have no particularly strong feelings about this album other than it’s just good music. No one song jumped out at me as a stand out hit but maybe I just wasn’t listening properly.
The one detriment to this album in my view is the 12 minute rambling story about something that happened when Kanye was working at Best & Less, which is odd considering I didn’t think that franchise existed in America?
4
Sep 24 2024
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Music From Big Pink
The Band
https://youtu.be/CxK_nA2iVXw?si=IiwJJCM_D27wbqh9
3
Sep 25 2024
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The Cars
The Cars
I get the feeling I will be repeating myself a lot in doing these reviews. So many of these albums are inoffensive music, usually erring on the side of good rather than bad even though they mostly don’t suit my tastes, I just can’t work out why they make a list of influential albums over so many other things that were excluded.
The Cars, as far as I’m concerned, are a reasonably competent pop-rock outfit from the time period where reasonably popular pop-rock outfits slayed pussy, but realistically what is the influence this album has had? Really just a one hit wonder with “Just What I Needed” which is a really catchy great track. The rest of the album though is just there. Nothing really attention grabbing.
Maybe I’m looking at these things wrong. It could be that these guys were the first to bring the synth sound into mainstream rock that was so prevalent through the 80s. I just don’t see the importance here.
Overall not a bad album. I don’t think I’d go out of my way to listen to it again aside from the hit, which I had already heard.
3
Sep 26 2024
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The Soft Bulletin
The Flaming Lips
Soft cock music critics wanking their shit raw to this probably.
I know I’m not enjoying an album on this list if I’m constantly checking to see how much time it has left. This album is unique in this aspect as it appears to have some sort of eldritch metaphysical quality where time slows to glacial pace, as this was one of the longest 58 minutes I have experienced.
There is no circumstance where I would go out of my way to listen to this.
It took three attempts to get through it.
I thought about why it grated me so much and I think 98% of it is the vocals. They are terrible. Of the 2% it would be the instrumental moments that just sound disjointed and nonsensical, and not in an interesting way, more like a kid playing with the default settings on a cheap Casio keyboard.
The redeeming factor is that outside these parts the instrumentals are okay. The album probably would be at least a 3 without the vocal track.
Special mention here of something that I couldn’t get out of my head is go to 1:17 in “A spoonful weighs a tonne”. There is a sound that reminds me of the first noise that plays in the looney tunes intro.
1
Sep 27 2024
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The Man Who
Travis
It least it has a unique sound compared to the other britslop on this godforsaken list. I would never go out of my way to listen to this.
The last song on this album is too long and nearly sent me to my grave.
2
Sep 30 2024
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On The Beach
Neil Young
There is no need for there to be seven Neil Young albums on this list.
Have you heard one Neil Young song?
Okay, you’ve heard every Neil Young song.
The band is good. The lyricism is good. Neil Young’s voice is annoying as fuck.
3
Oct 01 2024
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Superunknown
Soundgarden
The thing I most appreciate in a hard rock/metal album is actually having a groove, which this album has in spades. The instrumentation here I fantastic, groovy riffs and driving drum beats.
Chris Cornell’s vocals are pretty great I just wish he’d sing about something less depressing. I wonder whatever happened to that guy.
The downside to this album is that it’s extremely long. I checked in around Spoonman thinking the album must be over and Spotify just started an artist radio for Soundgarden or Audioslave. Nope, album is only halfway done. Could probably slice a few tracks off this and it would be a flat improvement even though I wouldn’t say any of them are particularly bad except Fourth of July.
4
Oct 02 2024
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Raw Power
The Stooges
This music is not good enough to get away with fucking thirteen year olds.
2
Oct 03 2024
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Odessa
Bee Gees
The Brothers Gibb giving us absolute generic Beatles clone soft rock music. It's serviceable, but you can see why no one knows anything outside the Bee Gees disco era. Not great, not terrible. Generic and forgettable. Give us a disco record next time thanks.
2
Oct 04 2024
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So
Peter Gabriel
Is Peter Gabriel evil Phil Collins or is Phil Collins evil Peter Gabriel?
Based on appearance one would think that it is the former, but upon reading the personal life and political views section of either artist on Wikipedia, it’s pretty clear that it’s the latter.
I did not like the songs where there was a woman singing. Sledgehammer obviously most notable song here.
It was alright.
3
Oct 07 2024
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Figure 8
Elliott Smith
It wasn't for me.
3
Oct 08 2024
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Iron Maiden
Iron Maiden
Lacking a bit of the production polish of what Maiden would turn out later which isn't unexpected for a nobody English metal band in 1980 that probably recorded this on the budget of a pie and chips. I vastly prefer Bruce Dickinson's vocals to Paul Di'annos but that's not to say that the vocals still don't go hard as fuck. Lot more gravelly but still with that operatic quality that big brucey brought in later. The main thing that sticks out to me is just how strong Steve Harris' influence as basically writer and head honcho of this outfit is and how signature that galloping bassline and general rhythm just drives all their music along. Definitely not my favourite Iron Maiden album but fuck me is it good.
4
Oct 09 2024
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Kenza
Khaled
What a nice photo for the album cover. This fellow looks like a nice family man who dearly loves his wife and children. I’m sure he treats them with all the love and affection he seems to put into his music. It’s funny I thought they spoke Flemish or German in Luxembourg, but this album sounds distinctly Arabic. Learn something new every day I guess.
3
Oct 10 2024
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Repeater
Fugazi
This album asks such important questions as: What if punk music was really boring?
2
Oct 11 2024
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Otis Blue/Otis Redding Sings Soul
Otis Redding
There's only so many songs about heartbreak you can do before you start wondering whether you're the problem.
4
Oct 14 2024
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Bringing It All Back Home
Bob Dylan
I take back what I said when we got the live album that Jew is alright.
I enjoyed this album a lot despite being an obnoxiously loud hater of Bob Dylan. His voice didn’t grate as much as it usually does on me probably turned down the highs on the mic so the “my allergies” tone didn’t cut as much. The band on this album is outstanding.
I particularly enjoyed Subterranean homesick blues, Maggie’s farm, and Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream.
Any slow tempo song about a woman was ass. Gates of Eden can suck me dry from behind via the fly of my jorts. What a piece of shit.
Anyway let this be a statement that sometimes I’m willing to be wrong about shit.
4
Oct 15 2024
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Fever To Tell
Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Hey that band that people only know because of the remix of one of their songs from a different album! Sure hope this isn’t boring indierock slop!
2
Oct 16 2024
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Pet Sounds
The Beach Boys
Influential, but utterly overrated and outdated. They play this for sundowning hospice patients to make them think they’re driving a car that runs on leaded gasoline to pick up their 14 year old “sweetheart”. The royalties the Beach Boys have received for the use of Wouldn’t it be nice in advertising has long since eclipsed the GDP of many African countries.
3
Oct 17 2024
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The Rising
Bruce Springsteen
Like that one bit in ratatouille where he tastes the food and is immediately sent back to childhood, this entire album, which thematically and sonically is just one big long song, took me straight back to standing in some kind of sporting goods or camping supplies store with this music, or something like it in every way, softly played over the in store speakers while my dad got incandescently angry at a 16 year old casual shop attendant.
This sounds like the soundtrack to every mid 00’s drama that somehow involves a road trip. It sounds like what plays on the radio in specialty stores, and in some places, sounds like music that would be played in an ad for a family SUV.
I did NOT care for it.
2
Oct 18 2024
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Metal Box
Public Image Ltd.
Trepanation is a process in which a hole is drilled into the skull. Derived from the Greek word, τρύπανον, meaning “to bore” or “to auger”.
1
Oct 21 2024
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Highway 61 Revisited
Bob Dylan
I did not like this as much as the other one. I think I must have just listened to dogshit recordings of this MF all my life cause he really ain’t that bad now I’m listening again. That loud ass harmonica is like having nails hit into your forehead though my god Bob you don’t have to blow so fucking hard
3
Oct 22 2024
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Eagles
Eagles
Recipe for a successful rock band
Ingredients:
Broad range of harmonies
Extremely competent instrumentals
Much less well known female musician
Eye watering ticket prices
Handful of disputes with recording label
5 or so of the biggest cunts to ever live
2 prostitutes (Age to taste)
Method:
Combine above ingredients starting with the woman no one knows or cares about, take her out once you’ve got the cunts in. Get really greedy with those ticket prices but make sure you add the royalties in equally with the cunts or the whole thing might fall apart prematurely. Toss in everything else as you go and don’t worry too much about overall quality, as long as each slice ends up with a few hits that people will remember. Season with prostitutes but make sure you check they’re old enough otherwise you may permanently tarnish the legacy of part of the recipe. The whole thing should disintegrate in the oven after about 5 minutes but don’t worry, fan it with an overdue tax bill and it should miraculously reform.
3
Oct 23 2024
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Is This It
The Strokes
The peak of “songs I’ve heard before somewhere else but don’t know the name”.
An album of very groovy, poppy rock music. I like it, but there’s not many I’d be tearing to go back to.
Famous for having an album cover you could have a pull to, except in the US where it was decided the general populace were too scared of pussy.
3
Oct 24 2024
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The Stone Roses
The Stone Roses
I will preface this by saying I vastly prefer "The Second Coming" as far as The Stone Roses are concerned.
This feels like the genetic precursor to the bastard deformed clones that emerged from the big vat labeled 1990's britpop. It has the same general vibe but its just better. It's funkier, the instrumentals are more interesting and varied, and even though the vocals don't really have a lot of variance they have a nice relaxed sound and are at minimum very distinct compared to the rest of what would follow.
I like it, I don't think it's their best work. I probably won't come back to anything specifically from this.
3
Oct 25 2024
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Nevermind
Nirvana
I really like the family guy bit where stewie goes back in time and stops kurt cobain killing himself by getting him into comfort eating, then travels back to the present and picks up a best of kurt cobain album where he's fat as fuck on the cover.
5
Oct 28 2024
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Endtroducing.....
DJ Shadow
Lowfi chill hiphop beats to be disappointed/disinterested to (10 hours).
3
Oct 29 2024
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Hounds Of Love
Kate Bush
Would.
4
Oct 30 2024
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Me Against The World
2Pac
I was told this man was a bum rapist so I did a bit of research on the fella, his views, his activism, and the actual charges that he got slapped with and I have to conclude that he got got by the same federal COINTELPRO machine that got Fred Hampton (PBUH) and continues to slander other black activists like MLKjr with bogus accusations and witnesses that appear out of thin air. I just want to stress that this fellas accuser was introduced to him by an FBI informant. Tupac literally dindu nuffin.
Anyway that’s irrelevant to the actual album. I don’t really like this era of West Coast production and I don’t really care for his delivery and voice generally, but I can’t deny the lyricism on the majority of these tracks. I can’t rate this one poorly on personal preference, it’s objectively good.
4
Oct 31 2024
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I’ve Got a Tiger By the Tail
Buck Owens
American Country music can be broadly divided into three categories:
1. My sweetheart ran off with another man, I’m flat broke, and my dog died.
2. I am on amphetamines and have a gun. Also my heart is broken.
3. I will personally suckle the penis of every US serviceman. Also I own a truck.
Category 3 is some of the worst dogshit ever put to record so it can be disregarded.
Category 2 is probably what a lot of people would associate with country music.
This is category 1. Everything a country artist recorded in the United States between probably 1900 and 1965 that wasn’t folk or bluegrass is this, all these guys are ready to throw themselves in a river, their shoes are worn out at the heel, they’ve got holes in their pockets, and their lady love threw the engagement ring off a cliff.
Buck Owens may be one of the best to ever do it like this. I didn’t recognise him from name and picture but I think I’ve heard every single track on this record at some point in my childhood. Act naturally was on some country compilation CD we had that probably got played so much it fell apart. I love this shit.
4
Nov 01 2024
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Superfuzz Bigmuff
Mudhoney
This sounds like your mates band who asks you to come to their show at some local venue and when you get there the place smells like shit and there are people actively doing nangs in the crowd. Profoundly generic music that I could not pick out of a lineup of any number of other low effort grungepunk slop.
2
Nov 04 2024
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If I Should Fall From Grace With God
The Pogues
As a high a three can go without being a 4. I really enjoyed this, but there were definitely a few tracks that were not my speed namely anything that mentions Christmas, which triggers my fight or flight reflex. What a present surprise to have Dubliners features on this. And I’d just like to say there is no way the lead singer of the Pogues is still alive.
3
Nov 05 2024
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Hotel California
Eagles
Better than their titular album and front loaded as a nursing Khazar mother. This is music you listen to while drunk and probably also indulging in a borrowed cigarette.
4
Nov 06 2024
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First Band On The Moon
The Cardigans
Like most people I only know the song “Lovefool” and I absolutely did not know the artist who performed it. This band definitely strikes me commercially as one hit wonders if they didn’t really have the mainstream legacy or longevity as an act, so I went into this assuming it was gonna be full of forgettable stinkers I would slog through never listen to again but I have to say this was a strong collection of songs that also have remarkable consistency as an album that most pop artists absolutely do not have. Just about every song here can stand on its own merits as a track beyond just the big singles. Instrumentally groovy and definitely projects the 90s low cut jeans type sound. The lead singers voice is pure sugar.
My personal favourite track on this album was Losers, and my least favourite was that weird cover of Iron Man.
This is the type of pleasant surprise listen to an artist I would never seek out otherwise that I wish this shitty list would give me more of rather than a 6th and 7th Bob Dylan album.
4
Nov 07 2024
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L.A. Woman
The Doors
More like L.AY down(for a nap) by the Snores
2
Nov 08 2024
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Henry's Dream
Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
Nick Cave is a real odd looking bloke. The prototype Australian goth who I’m astounded has not played Frankenstein monster or some other sort of baghoul before. I really enjoyed the opening track but my interest tapered off as the album progressed. Not for me but nonetheless competent music.
3
Nov 11 2024
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Sheer Heart Attack
Queen
Low band of 4. I absolutely love Queen but this one is absolutely not their best. Starts very strong with the albums two hits, Brighton Rock and the phenomenal Killer Queen. Tenement Funster then segueing into a bit of a medley until lap of the gods which I think is definitely one of the weaker tracks. Stone Cold Crazy brings it right back up to speed as a third hit from this one but the rest of the album from here is fairly well a non event. I will say that I really enjoyed Bring Back That Leroy Brown - bit of a silly one.
The usual fantastic instrumentation and harmonies you’ll find on just about every Queen record, this just isn’t their best material for the most part, but hey who am I to talk, my favourite Queen album is the Flash Gordon soundtrack.
4
Nov 12 2024
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Purple Rain
Prince
29:16 of filler and 14:35 of hits. I’ve never listened to Prince before aside the obvious hits and any Dave Chapelle bits. I was throughly disappointed with the rest of this album it was a drag to sit through, I don’t think a single additional track stood out to me or was particularly catchy. Meh record.
2
Nov 13 2024
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Enter The Wu-Tang (36 Chambers)
Wu-Tang Clan
There is not a wasted second on this banger of a record. Every single track and interlude goes hard as fuck and is such a crazy contrast to the west coast sound it was contemporary with.
Insane debut.
5
Nov 14 2024
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Elephant Mountain
The Youngbloods
What a pleasant listen. Never heard of these fellas and I can’t say I have any glaring criticisms. I would say my only issue was that I don’t think anything massively jumped out to me on this album but it was enjoyable nonetheless as an album.
4
Nov 15 2024
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The Hour Of Bewilderbeast
Badly Drawn Boy
Instrumentally interesting music with boring vocals that do absolutely nothing for me personally. Perhaps I would have more to say about this if I liked this genre, but this album for all its instrumental merit just made my eyes glaze over for the hour. I won’t knock the actual quality though.
3
Nov 18 2024
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Synchronicity
The Police
The Police are an overrated hits band fronted by a prominent example of why you shouldn’t let the bassist sing.
I do not like the white bot reggae vibe on show in this album.
The obligatory single hit from this album is probably their worst. Iron Maiden does songs about stalking women so much better.
Overall the only nice thing I have to say about this album is at least it’s not Regatta de Blanc.
1
Nov 19 2024
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Grace
Jeff Buckley
Better singer than he is a swimmer.
4