Non-Stop Erotic Cabaret

Worse than hot garbage

I am really, really not enjoying these one hit wonder bands.

Is it a porn flick? Gross.

The album is entirely carried by the mega-hit "Tainted Love".

Not a fan

This is not for me. Watered down, weak electronic beats over shrill vocals, and unflattering repetition that fails to succeed like in other electronic/dance albums. The only song that is listenable is tainted love, and even that song is so one-note. Say Hello, Wave Goodbye has to be one of the more annoying and tedious listens on this list so far (500 albums in) AND it's the closer. Bad bad bad. 1/5

I was looking for a reason to give this a 2 but I wasn't finding it. This is a good example of why I disliked most of the music coming out in the 80's. I didn't make it completely through a single song.

Kind of a lot to put up with for an hour+

Man, this album is just everything I don't like about 80's music. With some much good music in the world, why would I ever listen to this?

The sound which makes you glad you weren’t alive in the 80’s. Nothing.

Talk about a one-hit wonder considering the variance in the amount of listens on this album. From almost 1 billion on "Tainted Love" to 300,000 on "Insecute Me" and "Fun City". Usually that's a case where the album doesn't live up to the single. Definitely the case here.

This is the 44th album I’m rating. I’ve heard of the band but I’ve never listened to a song so this’ll be a brand new experience. Adding to my Playlist - Nothing. Not Adding to my Playlist - Frustration, Tainted Love, Seedy Films, Youth, Sex Dwarf, Entertain Me, Chips on my Shoulder, Bedsitter, Secret Life, and Say Hello, Wave Goodbye. All in all I liked 0/10 of the songs. Wow this shit fucking sucks. In a way I appreciate it for exposing me to a new sound but it really sucks.

Fucking beans, did people used to buy this? Woeful ain’t the word!

The only song I remotely like on this album is Tainted Love and even then I don't like this version of it.

It stinks

Tainted Love doesn't save this album from being a 1. AWFUL

Poor

High energy and annoying or low energy and boring. Always bad.

Same shaky novice vibrato in the singers voice and annoying 80s synth-pop with sax. So tired of the same pile of excrement in this list.

1/5

Didn't want to even finish this album, Tainted Love carries this band, every other song i heard was boring, confusing, or seemed to be intentionally annoying.

Not sure why a 1 hit wonder is considered to be an entire album that needs to be listened to

Trash

sleazy and 80s like the album cover. Cheesy 80s sax and synthesizers. Sexy Dwarf - “I would like you on a long black leash / Walk my doggie, walk my sexy little dwarf / They all love your miniature ways / You know what they say about small boys” then sounds of spanking and moaning like wtf 😭

One of the more annoying kinds of albums you come across on this list is “someone with an interesting voice who chooses to use it to make annoying noises instead of singing good.” This is only here for tainted love.

First track: Frustration. That kind of sums it up. Tainted Cell is a banger, apart from that I hope I never have to hear any other song from this record again.

Tainted Love is a classic. The rest is disappointingly 80’s garbage.

I was honestly so excited for this album after seeing tainted love was on it. That song rocks so hard and it’s amazing. Sadly, I was not on enough drugs or in my sex dwarf dungeon and the rest of the album just kinda…sucked. Weird lyrics, an off putting avant-garde style electrónica style of music and an album full of songs that just make you go wtf. I’ll stick with tainted love and forget the rest.

Had no clue their other songs had silly lyrics and goofy singing. Tainted Love will forever sound worse in the album’s context.

Ugh

This starts out so promising with the beginning of frustration but then the music comes in and sounds like that friend we all have that makes music but isn’t too great but people like them so it kinda gets popular. Tainted Love is the only good song and can’t even really give them credit for that.

No way - thank you

Not my taste. I've never liked Tainted Love either.

Tainted love is the only good song

No thank you. Everything about the 80s that annoys me. Tainted Love is fine. The rest is not for me.

Now I know why this band is a one hit wonder...and it was a cover.

Dated and irrelevant. No one will play this record on purpose.

Did not listen

Surprisingly awful, expected better tbh

Þetta er mjög persónuleg rating, ég bara gat ekki

I never liked them at the time. And decades later and having listened to it in full for the first time ever, I still dislike it. I never liked that early 80s synth based music and it just sounds so dated now. I was obviously on the other side of the school playground away from all the cool kids who loved it. I was in hibernation, waiting for guitar based indie pop to break through and inspire me. It was worth the long wait.

Fuck me, this was bad.

This album made me see why people hate the 80's. The tainted love cover is good.

You only need to hear their cover of Tainted Love. The rest of the album is just taking the piss. Overall: 2/10

No interest in Electro pop. I can see why others would like it, but I just don't like Soft Cell's music myself.

Really repetitive. Very disappointing. I do quite like Tainted Love, but it is a cover. Not great.

There was so much synth in this, couldn't handle it. So painfully 80s. Lots of sax too. Didn't enjoy it largely, and I couldn't tell if "sex dwarf" was satire or not.....I don't think it was. It made me laugh though. I've never really liked "tainted love" so perhaps not surprising I didn't really enjoy this. I do however think "say hello, wave goodbye" is a good track and the best thing here by far. There was a couple of songs around this point on the album where I thought maybe I could get into this, but then no back to synth and sax madness. 1.5,

Back in the early 80’s, I think I had either the 45 rpm single of Tainted Love or the 12 Inch extended mix of TL & “Where did our love go”. Either way, that was the correct purchase. The rest of the other tracks I struggled to get through. There could have been some comedic production value if the boys from Spinal Tap would have covered “Sex Dwarf”. I can see where the synth beats would have been popular in raves back in the day. The one super hit is iconic, and later done very well again by MM, but I can’t get higher than a 1 here.

After the needless woodwind solos started to pile up a few tracks in, I knew I was dealing with a 1/2 here. I check the track count….18 songs and 74 minutes?? Coffin nailed. I think it was presumptuous of them to go to the trouble of recording this and thinking anyone would enjoy it.

This combines everything I don't like about 80s music. The synthetic beats, simple melodies and sooo many played like this. Except for Tainted Love nothing special.

Nope. Not even Sex Dwarf.

As much as I expected to enjoy the song Sex Dwarf, I just couldn't with this album. Although bonus points for the lyric "I think it's time to cook a meal to fill the emptiness I feel" which speaks directly to my soul.

No

One good song.

Nothing special

Was expecting typical 80s garbage cheese, but this was truly a crime against humanity. Sometimes I think the listmaker is trolling. I mean sure, maybe the list deserves one of these albums for it to be truly diversified and interesting, but how many more of these 80s albums do we really have to sit through?

Legit pretty bad. There's the one good song, tainted Love, but it's a cover apparently and the rest of the album is a totally different vibe. A lot of quite bad melodic vocals

bruhh ugh lame shit Significant 38/123 Liked 17/123 Added 4/123 NNN

Bad vocals, droning synth, pervy lyrics...really nothing I enjoyed about this. These dudes seem like a couple of creeps.

Puffff... Ni porque está el Tainted Love....🤦🏻‍♂️

Frustration. This didn’t quite Entertain Me.

Really bad. Tainted Love is a classic but every other song on the album is boring or annoying. Never a good sign when I'm constantly checking how much longer the album is.

Did not like any song that much did not finish but I get what they were going for.

Why are these nerds so horny? Way too much crappy singing, moaning, synth, and horns. I don't get it.

Huh heb ik dit geluisterd?

Werd er enorm zenuwachtig van dus heb het afgezet. Kwam wel echt door de manier van zingen

I strongly dislike very 80s music

Terrible, terrible, terrible. The only decent song they have is Tainted Love.

Not interested

i don’t want to be cruel but i’m so sick of this degenerate shit

Lot less fun and exciting then what i was hoping for based of tainted love, but its still solid for what it is.

Ick

I hate it

Don't like this band.

Tainted Love is a great song. I have no clue how it came out of this group.

Worthless

muito fraco. conheço uma música, que é a única que achei se destacar no álbum, mas provavelmente devido à familiaridade que já tinha com a mesma.

You know, it can't feel so great when your one big hit wasn't actually your song. But then, I'm sure the boys of Soft Cell are crying all the way to the bank with that one because the rest of this album is utter, hot garbage so at least they're making money off of the cover of "Tainted Love". This really is a truly terrible album. Starting on track 3, ("Seedy Films") the vocals go off the rails, not even trying to be in tune. The lyrics get more and more stupid as it goes and the the actual musical production gets increasingly erratic. One good song does not an album make and I shouldn't have to listen to the rest of this trash because "Tainted Love" is someone's jam. It's just a damn mess of a record and I'm pissed off I had to listen to it.

Too 80s for me

I hated this so much even tainted love couldn’t convince me otherwise.

Wavy, dry, witty lyrics but to me rather a work around the hit single with not so much essentialiaty.

Became terrible after tainted love. Sex dwarf was especially horrendous. Had to turn it off

No wonder why tainted love is the only song I knew from them

That was so, so bad. Painful and awkward.

Todella raskasta ihan kivan alun (2 ekaa biisiä) jälkeen. Osin sietämätöntökin tahallaan shokeeraavaa kamaa. Eroottisuusteema ei toimi edes vitsinä

Sisältää yhden loistavan esimerkin sovittamisen pelottavasta voimasta. Loput sijoittuu enimmäkseen akselille tylsä - hymyilyttävä.

I can see why Tainted Love was their only big song

Not a single redeeming quality

Every time I think I might feel like I’m getting into it they do something to remind me I’m really not

This is a fun album. It is also an absolutely terrible album where I often genuinely wondered how on earth Soft Cell recorded, let alone released, these tracks. On 'Youth', Marc Almond can't hit a single note even if his life depended on it. The only bearable moments are 'Tainted Love', 'Seedy Films', and the closer 'Say Hello, Wave Goodbye'. Having sung and danced countless times in my life to 'Tainted Love', I've wondered why I hadn't dived deeper into their discography. Now I know why.

I feel fru-fru-fru-fru-frustration listening to this. How is this a serious record!? The lyrics sound as if improvised a lazy afternoon. The production is equally lazy and just plain boring. Also Almond's vocals are horrendous. He almost seems to deliberately avoid hitting any tones on the entire record. This is the sound of the high school singer you all applauded out of pity and then talked about behind his back. Imagine being this bad and still have the courage to release "Sex Dwarf".

Everything was terrible except the Tainted Love/Where Did Our Love Go? combo. If I heard Spinal Tap singing Sex Dwarf I would have liked it, but the fact that it wasn't a parody is disturbing. Considering that this was probably a pretty influential album, and there were occasional interesting non-lyrical moments, I can add half a star but that's the best I can do. 1.5 stars.

Awful.

This sounds like punk like singing with synthesizers. It has one good song "Chips on my Shoulder". I don't think synth music is my jam.

Their version of "Tainted Love" slaps and slaps hard. If we were only rating that song, this thing is a 5 with a bullet. It's such a great version that few realize that Tainted Love is actually a cover. But the rest of this is something of a snooze. There seem to be some blue prints for the Pet Shop Boys sprinkled throughout. But as the kids would say, there's no THERE there. Props, I guess, for making their take on Tainted Love the definitive version. One HIT wonders don't belong on this list. I'd rather the list made room for a One ALBUM wonder, like The Knack's "Get The Knack". Now that's an album with songs that live up to (and some would say surpass) their one hit (My Sharona).

I like the music but not the singers voice or vocal style. Tainted love is a banger. I'm not a huge fan of 80s electronic music. It sounds dated and cheesy.

nope

Definitely not for me.

I disliked this. Quite a bit. "Tainted Love" is of course fondly remembered, though I have to wonder, in the context of the rest of the album, how I would feel about "Tainted Love" if I heard it for the first time today with the rest of "Non-Stop Erotic Cabaret." I can't decide if Soft Cell is authentically presenting themselves (or at least an exaggerated version of themselves), or if this is all for show. Marc Almond wrote this stuff when he was in his early 20s... so why does he present the mid-life crisis of a 40-year-old middle class worker bee, and also the late 20s crisis of a bedsitter? "I have life/ I have cage/ I'm going bald/ I want to tell the world/ I've done nothing/ I've achieved nothing/ I work for a firm/ But I want to burn it down, down" and also "I think it's time to cook a meal/ To fill the emptiness I feel/ Spend my money going out/ I've nothing in I'm left without" So much discontentedness! Give these guys something to help them feel better about their life/the world! (They apparently got heavily into ecstacy in the next few years.) And then there's the entirety of "Sex Dwarf." I just can't. It's probably not serious? I mean, if that's your fetish, more power to you, as long as everyone is consenting and there's no problematic power imbalance. But was a whole song about it really necessary? This was an apparently positive review - Melody Maker magazine said "Non-Stop Erotic Cabaret... confronts clubland with its patchy past, rubs perspective in its pretty painted face and acts like it means nothing... Aggressively embarrassing, Cabaret is the brashest, most brilliant and least-caring indictment of pop music's bankruptcy I've ever heard. No compassion, no sorrow, no joy, it just faces facts and moves to the motions... Like traditional cabaret, the whole thing parodies true emotion and like the best subversive cabaret its shallowness makes those devalued emotions even more painful – the very real decadence of this album springs from its callous realisation of pop's impotency, and yet its bored resignation to the ritual." Brash and brilliant sound positive, but the rest? So it was just meant to be subversive? I guess it was, but lyrically and musically this did not do for me what other subversive music from psychedelic and punk rock have done.

One star for my daughter repeatedly asking me what a sex store is because of this album.

I couldn’t get past one song after tainted love, which my friend ryan used to call the BART song because that incessant beep sounded like the BART train horns. I like the song well enough. I remember there were two versions. The reasonably long enough version and then the long version that moved into where did our love go and sometimes the radio would play that one and it felt kind of special. But it turns out there’s a third version. And it’s about 20 minutes long, which is seventeen minutes and thirty seconds longer than most any song should be. This tells me (a) they think this is their best song and that it’s super good so they should just keep playing it forever and (b) consequently, the remainder of the album is likely G_d awful. The next song confirmed this, so I didn’t continue.

not very memorable unfortunately

Hmm, is this really a good album or does it just have "Tainted Love" on it... UPDATE: Gave up at "Sex Dwarf" wtf is this shit lol

Definitely NOT my genre of music!

FUCKING AWFUL

Is that Pedro Pascal in this band? Nah, nevermind he'd never do something so middling that your best song is a cover of a better song.

This is the most 80s album I’ve heard in a while...

No

Woof. Pass. There are so many similar bands from this time that are more interesting.

Liked a couple of songs, sounds the same throughout. 1/5