Being There
WilcoI can’t will(co) myself to finish this album because it is so disastrously boring. Yet, not sure I can quite give it that number reserved for only the worst of the worst.
I can’t will(co) myself to finish this album because it is so disastrously boring. Yet, not sure I can quite give it that number reserved for only the worst of the worst.
You remember that kid from your floor freshman year with the guitar? This is what he makes when he’s in his 40’s, after a trip to India in which he thinks he’s found some life-changing revelation while talking to the first yogi he can find. He’s not deep, he’s not insightful, and he’s certainly ignorant. Oh and he paid for the trip to India with the money from the divorce settlement. A marriage in which he hypnotized a business student to fall for his false sensitivity during college. By the time he’s 30, she realizes he’s going to live up to nothing and all that talk about changing the world was BS. By the times he’s 40, he can’t even maintain an erection without his guitar in his hands and she’s plowing her boss, a Fortune 500 CEO. She ditches him, but not before he can suckle off her teet one last time and take half the money. After the trip to India, he spends the rest of the money on American Bald Eagle tattoos and studio time. He makes the album cover himself, because no one else could quite possibly understand the tortured artist that is him. He can’t afford Adobe Suite by this time, so he has to settle for a bootleg version, risking his computer’s health while downloading it off a foreign website. His computer, a thrifted 1998 IBM, “it’s vintage”, more like he’s “poor af”, does eventually concede to the virus it extracted from “freecomputersoftware.cn”. After releasing, he waits for the praise from all his loved ones, as well as his adoring fans. Unfortunately for him, he has no loved ones. His family distanced themselves after a story went viral of him attempting to live in the ceiling of a Starbucks after hours because he couldn’t afford rent. He only got caught because his late night diet of caramel macchiato’s and pastries led to terrible IBS, and without a bathroom to use in the ceiling, he had to come down during the day or risk sh***** all over his living space. Once he did, he still didn’t reach the bathroom in time, because a group of 15 year old’s were in there doing Tik Tok’s to a Meghan Thee Stallion song where she queefs the National anthem. Furthermore, he has no fans because no one likes the album and the small minority of people that do hate him more. After crapping any ounce of hope away, literally, he is booked by local PD for trespassing. As he is walked to the car in handcuffs, he intentionally trips himself and claims police brutality. The judges rule in his favor and awards him $1.3m in damages. By the time he’s 50, he’s spent all his money investing in a penis growth serum. Naturally, it fails, like his erections, and he’s left wandering the streets of Chicago with nothing but a shopping cart full of Rising Above Bedlam CD’s. He tries to pawn them off to other homeless people, but they bark at him that “physical media is so not in style anymore.” He is found one morning, frozen to death, the last ember of his fire gone out. In the fire, Chicago PD discovers that he had burnt the last of his CD’s to stay warm. The coroners office cannot decide whether the cause of death was from freezing, inhaling burning CD’s, or broken heart from a dream lost. Without a clear answer he writes: “cause of death - Covid-19.” Not on Apple f*** Spotify Free has ads and Random songs throughout Haiku aside, I can respect the experimental nature of this. It’s very interesting to listen to and I’d give it a 2.5 if I could. It’s not bad, and much better than some of the 2’s I’ve given. Idk if it’s a 3 tho. Also, I had to listen on Spotify Free which included ads and random songs in between songs. It definitely did not help this album. It also meant I couldn’t listen in order which was soul-crushing.
so this is an album I love, but not top to bottom. Kick, Push, He Say She Say, Sunshine, Daydreamin’, American Terrorist, and Kick, Push II are all iconic to me. This album holds a special place in my heart, and I’m surprised it was on this list. Maybe there is hope for what’s to come… “My first picture was a lineup” - Jay Z, you performed at a Hillary Clinton campaign rally. Britney Spears has more street cred than you at this point. This outro seriously makes me consider dropping it to a 2. Wow. F*** you Lupe. “Shoutout Xhamster.com. That one vid I found on April 23, 2002 was amazing. I’ve searched for it for so long and still haven’t found it. Much love.”
mid
kinda mid, kinda good. I like a couple tracks.
Not good
mid, nothing to it really
Great from top to bottom, I’d give it a 4.5 if I could. Doesn’t have the “it” factor of a 5 star, but it had no issues.
Just boring really. I tried to listen to this album a couple years back, wanting to like it. However, it’s just boring af. Instrumentally it is quite good at points, but it never builds and by staying stagnant it’s somewhat boring. The singing voices are not notable, arguably even bad. All in all, mid as a Wednesday afternoon. Sounds like it was made by a 65 year old hipster. Reminds me of the scene from The Office where Robert California starts a band in the warehouse by burgling Andy, Darrel, and Kevin’s instruments.
I like. Funky. Wish I could give it 2.5.
One of my all time favorites. Automatic 5. I will enjoy the entire day listening to this gem. Greatest use of a sample ever on Someday.
Listened to it before a handful of times. very Good from what I remember. I'm a big fan of Michael Kiwanuka, so I'm excited to listen closely this time. So good. Awesome. Loved listening to it from top to bottom.
Wtf is this cover. I like the start of the first song rn tho, can’t lie. Is this guy mentally handicapped? It’s honestly quite goood. Trending towards a 3 rn. It’s a 2.5, closer to 3 than 2 tho. However, it feels wrong that it’s one star from Kiwanuka, which was more like a 4.5 than a 4. Happy to finish listening, it was okay, nothing I’m going to relisten to tho. It has potential to grow on me tho.
Let’s goooooo, Earth Wind and Fire. I’m pumped. As good as I expected. Pure 4. Great listen
I’m not getting these 50 min back, am I? I can respect it. It’s not bad. But I ain’t gonna be clawing to relisten.
Rap. Music. Wicky wick wickety, goes the sound of the record. Spinning vinyl like hair shedding off a German Shepard. I can't believe im listening to the sam- sa- same lyric over and over and over again. This record spinning bs is making a headache begin. It's not ba- ba - bad- bad, but it's pretty mid at the end of the day. I aint The Rock in an animated kids movie, but what can I say?
Very good. I’d prolly give it a 3.5 if I could, but I’m forced to subject it to a 3. I liked it a lot, but it’s not really sticking with me. I’ll listen more and see if it deserves the bump to 4. Update: na, stuck at a free. Sorry love.
When a fish deserts its father for greener kale beds, it does something uncommon: claims its independence despite the consequences. Sure, it may meet a few fish along the way to give it guidance. And maybe one of them has a sexy facial scar. But at the end of the day, that father's heart will never be whole until its boy comes home. When I listen to this album, I feel like the father, watching my 7th grade music taste run away from home, claiming its independence. But as for this fish, I will not be chasing after him. I mean seriously, has the bloke never heard of natural selection? My 7th grade music taste can become shark bait for all I care. Ta Ta, Tuttle!
2. I haven't even listened and I know what this is getting. Damn this is actually pretty good. Moving towards 3 territory. Rock Box and 30 Days stuck out to me.
Aptly named “The Who”, because when people hear their music, they consistently ask, “Who tf Likes this shit?!”. Leave the owl noises to the birds, mates, and I’m not talkin about the fit ones you try to grind on in the clubs. Cheerio and g’day to this absolutely boring album.
Wow perfect timing for this, holy shi*. This is my all time favorite Christmas album. Fun fact: Phil Spector murdered one of his wives. He also produced Let it Be, and Paul hated it so much that decades later he made Let it Be… Naked, which is honestly better. Also, Spector married one of the women on this album, I think the lead singer of the Ronettes. She wasn’t the one who got murdered tho. Anyways, preemptive 4. Update: Michael Buble can leave his pasty ass by the fire, he ain’t got nothin on this.
This used to be my favorite Beatles album. I listened to it way too much as a teen. I’m a Paul fanboy so When I’m Sixty Four and Lovely Rita hit diff. Give me all the fluff! John called that style “old granny s***”. Also, She’s Leaving Home is my all time favorite Beatles song. Then you got LSD and the intro and outro. Damn, maybe this was my favorite album all along, I just got bored of saying it. Fixing a Hole is another just, wow, random Beatles song that’s pure greatness. Okay I’m looking at the track listing now to see what I forgot. Okay, Within You Without You is flaming hot garbage, it irks me to my core that it’s on this masterpiece of an album. Fuck you George. Oh how could I forget A Day in the Life, one of the greatest ever songs. Gee Zowy this album is amazing. I want to listen so bad but it’s 5 AM and I have to get up early. Ahhhhh, so excited that this is todays album! Re-listened and I was grinning ear to ear the whole time. This album is an antidepressant. Within You Without You deserves to be publicly beheaded tho. You can argue the merit of the sitar all day long, but this track sticks out like a sore thumb. And not in a good way. For those I haven’t mentioned yet, With a Little Help is great. Getting Better is more Paul Fluff, which I eat up. Being for the Benefit is a wacky song that gives this album the spine to be a concept album. Good Morning is fine. Final words: I love this album and it holds a very, very special place in my heart.
Halfway through and I f***ing love it. Breakin downnnnnnn is a keeper. The lead singer is not very good, but the music is great. Wanted to give it 3.5 if I could.
pretty good but completely forgettable, like Black Panther 2. Well someone had to say it, and the critics weren’t. 2.5 if I could. Also, this is a plea to Wolfmeow to not quit. I love reading your reviews, you constantly make me laugh. Please suffer through the punk albums, if only to make the embers of my cold little heart keep me somewhat warm in this dreary winter.
This album is just boring. It’s the kind of album I should like. I’m the target audience here. I focus on music without giving lyrics any thought and I like the era and genre. If I can’t find any value in this, I can’t imagine other people do. My music taste would would indicate that I should love this, yet, alas, I do not.
I can’t will(co) myself to finish this album because it is so disastrously boring. Yet, not sure I can quite give it that number reserved for only the worst of the worst.
It’s become trendy to say you like Tribe, damn liberals!! I’ve only listened to singles before, never a full album, so I’m curious to get the full experience. So far, I like the sound. Well, I finally forced myself to finish this bad boy. The production was akin to a SoundCloud rapper at times. It was interesting enough for a 2.5, but I wouldn’t rate it higher than that. I’m tired of these one-track albums. Would this album really be here without Can I Kick It?
I love the Bee Gee’s. I’ve only really listened to their 60’s albums and Saturday Night Fever, so this is new. I think Odessa is their best. Maybe it’ll come later. But, I love the name and album cover, and the opening track is getting me goin. The Al Green cover is superior, but it’s a great one regardless. Barry Gibb is my spirit animal. Want to give it 3.5. I’m glad we got an early Bee Gees album because everyone just views them as the disco group, but they’re much more. They were like a Beatles/Moody Blues mixture before SNF. I relistened to SNF after this and holy moly, I forgot how good it is.
Holy shit, it’s the chick from Portlandia! I never knew she was a “musician”. Also, I found a Sleater-Kinney song already in my library and it’s actually somewhat good, unlike this album. Maybe she should stick to acting…
Holy fuck, this album is a diamond in the rough. Back when I was a wee high schooler, I found this thing and loved it. Now, I get to listen to it from top to bottom for the first time in awhile. I know I’ll love some songs, because I still listen to them somewhat regularly, but I’m hoping maybe I find another one to relisten to. “I Talk to the Wind” just makes me stiff in the pants everytime. “Epitaph” is perfection. “The Court of the Crimson King” is a delight to the senses. Well, I forgot the album only had 5 tracks. I loved the three tracks I named and still do. I listen to them regularly, so it wasn’t much of a new experience. The other 2 are good, but nothing great for me. Great album, can’t give it a 5 though. It’d be a 4.5 if I could. Also, 1969 is THE year of Rock & Roll, so this fits in nicely with its counterparts. This is the kind of album that ruins most others for me. Anytime a rock album introduces something other than guitar and drums, I’m hooked, and this has it in aces. I'm still waiting for that brand new album that blows my socks off.
A rap song with a female R&B singer released in late 90s/early 2000s usually gets my panties in a bunch, so when it's an entire album of that and the rapper is the same woman, my panties practically rip through my abdomen and tear me in half as if I was laid down on the deli slicer at the nearest Star Market. This is another album I already know so well. I want new music, and half the time I feel like I am just revisiting the same music I already have hours of listening logged for. Having side that, I love this album with a passion. 4/5. I haven't listened to this top to bottom in awhile, so I'm hoping something new jumps out to me. I've always gravitated towards R&B style rap, and it's why modern rap makes my ears bleed while I slowly decompose due to boredom. I always loved this album cover. I wish they had a shredded down pencil on the top tho, as if it were the carving tool of her face. That pencil is too picture-perfect. And if anyone chats s*** about the skits, they can go f*** right off! They make the album way more personal and I always really liked how they zoom out while still tying into the themes. Also, I like how it’s some kind of Love AA group.
It’s not the type of thing I’d listen to while bouncing up and down the streets of Brookline, with my hair in pigtails and my ass looking plumper than a soon-to-be ripe peach. But, who is to say that that stands as the key measurement of an album? Maybe I prefer to listen while seated at an Irish pub in the middle of December, grizzly Caucasian men huddled around me, giving me warmth. One of them jerking me off under the bar stool, while the others recite my Bar Mitzvah portion in perfect harmony, reaching all the high notes. Alas, who is to say that THAT is the key measurement? I started this journey as a boy, wandering the earth for some purpose and following the persuasive winds of Zeus until I found my constant Trail. I’m still that lost little boy, with more question marks than answers, and more wrong answers than right questions. If I’ve learned anything on this journey, it’s that the mark of a man is not branded by their superiors or underlings. The only one who can brand me is the face that looks back in the mirror every dusk when I furiously pet my shaft in the waning hours of daylight. So, it's only natural for this little boy to make another misstep. This time coercing myself into thinking I’d be able to listen to 86 min of Deep Purple. 86 f***** min. That’s approximately 4.637 plays of Rhapsody in Blue. Father Gershwin, I repent for my sins. Forgive me now, for I do not know what I hath done.
You remember that kid from your floor freshman year with the guitar? This is what he makes when he’s in his 40’s, after a trip to India in which he thinks he’s found some life-changing revelation while talking to the first yogi he can find. He’s not deep, he’s not insightful, and he’s certainly ignorant. Oh and he paid for the trip to India with the money from the divorce settlement. A marriage in which he hypnotized a business student to fall for his false sensitivity during college. By the time he’s 30, she realizes he’s going to live up to nothing and all that talk about changing the world was BS. By the times he’s 40, he can’t even maintain an erection without his guitar in his hands and she’s plowing her boss, a Fortune 500 CEO. She ditches him, but not before he can suckle off her teet one last time and take half the money. After the trip to India, he spends the rest of the money on American Bald Eagle tattoos and studio time. He makes the album cover himself, because no one else could quite possibly understand the tortured artist that is him. He can’t afford Adobe Suite by this time, so he has to settle for a bootleg version, risking his computer’s health while downloading it off a foreign website. His computer, a thrifted 1998 IBM, “it’s vintage”, more like he’s “poor af”, does eventually concede to the virus it extracted from “freecomputersoftware.cn”. After releasing, he waits for the praise from all his loved ones, as well as his adoring fans. Unfortunately for him, he has no loved ones. His family distanced themselves after a story went viral of him attempting to live in the ceiling of a Starbucks after hours because he couldn’t afford rent. He only got caught because his late night diet of caramel macchiato’s and pastries led to terrible IBS, and without a bathroom to use in the ceiling, he had to come down during the day or risk sh***** all over his living space. Once he did, he still didn’t reach the bathroom in time, because a group of 15 year old’s were in there doing Tik Tok’s to a Meghan Thee Stallion song where she queefs the National anthem. Furthermore, he has no fans because no one likes the album and the small minority of people that do hate him more. After crapping any ounce of hope away, literally, he is booked by local PD for trespassing. As he is walked to the car in handcuffs, he intentionally trips himself and claims police brutality. The judges rule in his favor and awards him $1.3m in damages. By the time he’s 50, he’s spent all his money investing in a penis growth serum. Naturally, it fails, like his erections, and he’s left wandering the streets of Chicago with nothing but a shopping cart full of Rising Above Bedlam CD’s. He tries to pawn them off to other homeless people, but they bark at him that “physical media is so not in style anymore.” He is found one morning, frozen to death, the last ember of his fire gone out. In the fire, Chicago PD discovers that he had burnt the last of his CD’s to stay warm. The coroners office cannot decide whether the cause of death was from freezing, inhaling burning CD’s, or broken heart from a dream lost. Without a clear answer he writes: “cause of death - Covid-19.” Not on Apple f*** Spotify Free has ads and Random songs throughout Haiku aside, I can respect the experimental nature of this. It’s very interesting to listen to and I’d give it a 2.5 if I could. It’s not bad, and much better than some of the 2’s I’ve given. Idk if it’s a 3 tho. Also, I had to listen on Spotify Free which included ads and random songs in between songs. It definitely did not help this album. It also meant I couldn’t listen in order which was soul-crushing.
The production on this is incredible. I was eager to see who produced this and it was him! The fact that this guy basically made this album on his own is quite an achievement. With a better singing voice and less repitive tracks, this coulda been a 4. I liked it a lot tho. Surpised me. Swept me off my feet, you could say. Apparently, the vocals were all added after the beats were completed, which makes sense because there’s definitely a disconnect between the two when listening. The beats are great and the vocals feel somewhat forced at points, as if covering a Ferrari in a new coat of paint. I consider The Delfonics one of the greatest singing groups of all time, so I was happy to hear La La Means I Love You sneak in there, which he covered really well.
I have looked into the crystal ball… I see many 1’s in your future… Makes Ian Dury sound like f***** Mozart
My favorite Black Sabbath record, but how much does that really mean? It’s like a third grader saying their favorite movie. This is even better than I remembered. I only remembered liking Black Sabbath (song), but the whole album is great. More like a 3.5 for me, but closer to a 4.
It’s bittersweet to see an album I already know pretty well. At least I like this one, so I know I’ll enjoy the day listening to it. Before I relisten it’s a 3.5, closer to a 4. I sing “Don’t Call Me N***** Whitey” all the time with adlib’d lyrics but no one ever understands the reference. Now, they gonna understand. Not as good as I remember, still like it tho.
This process has certainly dulled the allure of rock n’ roll. F*** Deep Purple. “Child in Time” was fantastic though, I just say. This was honestly better than I expected, but still not good. Great album cover though.
I’d rather listen to Plantasia 13.21 times, but I don’t have that choice. Already know this album, eye roll. Yeah, I typed out eye roll, go f*** yourself. Textbook 3. Sounds good enough, but makes me feel nothing. Absolutely nothing. If this album were a psychiatrist, it’d be out of a job. Singer’s voice sounds identical to that of Carole King. Absolutely identical. If those two were twins, they’d be in a job. Honestly, I’m going down to a 2. I found myself waiting for it to end, which is indicative of a score lower than 3. Sorry fake Carole, eat sh**!
Verdict: Rust Sleeps. Sounds like it was made in a single dad’s garage with a band he hired off Craigslist. I could’ve listened to “The Second Time Around” by Frank Sinatra Jr on the Ed Sullivan Show at least 19 times instead of this, but f*** me, right? Not a big Neil Young fan on or off the pitch (his music is dull and he’s a self-righteous mega-millionaire). I’ll try to listen with an open mind, but I can’t forget that this guy is one of those Canadiens who come down here and then complain about everything and talk about how much worse USA is while making millions off playing a guitar. “Boo, Capitalism!”, “Reginald, would you please place my diamond encrusted male g-string in my left gold-plated dresser, not my right one? Gosh, I just love this green stuff. How do I keep getting so much of it?” This guy thought he was so special that when he didn’t like Joe Rogan’s podcast, he said to Spotify, “It’s Rogan or Young. Not both” so they decided that the 55 year old dads of the world were gonna have to go somewhere else for their music and removed Young’s entire catalogue. Oops Neil, how’s the ego after that one? I’m guessing still very much intact. Well, you’re still worth $200m, which if you are as righteous as you act, you could donate to charity. No? You’d rather put that money to the DNC? Okay, another cog in the political machine, fantastic. Thanks so much for this album today, and thank you even more for being such a caring hundred millionaire. This guy is so in love with himself that when he does eventually decide to be charitable, he holds a benefits concert. Rather than simply donating from his vast fortune, he holds an event where he’s praised for his musical prowess and generosity. How selfless Neil. Well, now that that’s all said, let’s get this puppy started. Your voice is as mediocre as I remember. Didn’t remember the harmonica fetish, and I don’t dig it. Stevie Wonder with a harmonica? F*** yeah! You? Drop the harmonica and come out with your hands up. I promise I’m listening unbiased and with an open mind: this is one of the most boring albums yet. It feels like it’s going in slow motion.
An hour-long alt rock album? Cmon man. You don’t need the hour, I don’t need the hour. Keep your sh** to 40 min and call it a day. This feels closer to Black Sabbath than Elliott Smith, and I can’t say I dig it. Has a kind of Dark Nirvana feel to it.
I’ve tried very hard to like Aja, but I just can’t. Hopefully this can be the one that sets me down Steely Dan Blvd. This is tough. It is better than a 2, but not good enough for a 3. If I were Liad “Mr. Round-Up” Zaffrani, I’d give it the 3. But luckily, I’m not. So it’s a 2. Okay, I can’t lie, this is growing on me. I’ve listened about four times straight and I’m starting to really like it. It definitely doesn’t have the panache or consistency of a 4, but I’ve definitely warmed to it. Maybe I’m more similar to Liad “Mr. Round-Up” Zaffrani than I care to admit. This felt like the Oasis album: it was good, but didn’t grab me save for a few tracks. I gave that a 3, so it’s only fair. Hopefully, Liad “Mr. Round-Up” Zaffrani will be proud of me.
This is our first album in the bottom 20 globally!! This sh** lowkey kinda good. Y’all can’t tell me you ain’t moving on Fly Away (Butterfly Reprise). No, this isn’t Arctic Monkeys. It’s not fast or exciting. It’s 90’s R&B and when taking that into context, this is pretty good. I’m between a 2 and 3. My mind says a 2, but my heart says 3. However, because she has the waist jewelry thing on in the album cover, my quivering member says 3. By majority, it’s a 3, and yes I expect to get flamed for this score. It’s a 2, plain and simple. Idc what my body says. No, I’m going with my heart. It’s a 3. It’s a bottom of the barrel 3, but a 3 nonetheless.
BOOOOOOOOORING. We’re on quite a cold streak right now.
Obviously we all know “Chain of Fools” and “Natural Woman”, so I’m looking for substance between the hits. Also, a transgender organization just tried to cancel “Natural Woman” for saying it’s offensive. Then, people thought they were joking, but they said they were being serious. Then, after more backlash, they claimed they were a satire group. When stuff like that happens, I just try to picture a board room, where people vote on whether or not to forget what they stand for, so as to save their own skin. How spineless are these people? And how angry do people get when their colleagues act spineless? Wasn’t a huge fan of her “People Get Ready” cover. Actually it grew on me. I liked it after reslistening. All in all, it was just okay. Not my favorite Aretha album, but she’s a beast obviously. A Natural Woman is so so good.
Idk if it’s because we’ve been listening to absolutely dreadful music, but this was quite good. Maybe I do like Santana. Shameful number of covers though. Shoutout to twosqishes for having a nice tush.
A white reggae album produced by Elvis Costello? Holy sh**, I am excited. Like chicken without seasoning.
How tf did we get two Elvis Costello produced albums in a row? Smh, this is so bad it doesn’t even earn criticism.
I don’t remember this being very exciting. Just boring af.
Boring. I always though Everybody’s Talkin was a Harry Nilsson original, so now I have to live with that too.
Moon dance is actually my favorite Van Morrison track, but I’ve never listened to this album. Again though, that means absolutely nothing because I haven’t been exposed to much Van Morrison. Honestly, pretty good. Mans gets in his feels and does it with good music. Really grew on me. There are a few tracks I REALLY liked outside of Moondance. A very strong 3.
BRO BRO BRO BRO BRO BRO BRO BRO BRO YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IM A MJ LOYALIST. I DONT BELIEVE THE RUMORS AND I FEEL BAD HOW THE LAST 25 YEARS OF HIS LIFE PLAYED OUT. HE SEEMED LIKE SUCH A GENTLE SOUL AND EVERYONE TRIED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE. BESIDES THAT THOUGH, THIS IS MY FAVORITE MJ ALBUM. THRILLER IS ALMOST PERFECT, BUT THIS HOLDS A MORE SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART. Smh, I remembered this being better. It was just okay at the end of the day. It’s a 3 for me.
3. Album no 50 the same night Lebron broke the record.
I don’t want Irish singers bro.
I know I’ve listened to a good deal of punk at this point, but this was some of the least original music I’ve ever heard. I genuinely feel as though I’ve heard this entire album before, only by a different band and with a different album name.
If Neil Young started his career in today’s world, he would be the SoundCloud rapper from your high school that everyone makes fun of. His voice is akin to a poorly-circumcised cat. I genuinely think I have a better singing voice than him, and that’s saying something. It pains me to give this a 3, but I gotta be impartial here and it’s pretty good musically. It’s a bottom of the barrel 3, but a 3 nonetheless. Also, I finally met the legendary Woofmeow and it was my greatest achievement as a reviewer. All I can do is try to inspire the next generation like she does.
You know it’s bad when one of the main compliments for an album is that “John Lennon said he enjoyed it”. Not that he loved it, was inspired by it, or couldn’t stop playing it. That he enjoyed it. Well, I enjoy my 10:30 AM shit’s, but you don’t see me putting that sh** in my Wikipedia page. And when I say 10:30 AM shit’s, I mean these albums. And when I say enjoy, I mean loath with an unbridled passion. If not for Rock Lobster, this would be a 1.
Look at this smug SOB staring back at me. “You sucker!” he’s saying, “No way you’re actually gonna listen to me. I mean, I’m a COMPLETE waste of time.” So it’s basically a collection of David Bowie songs that Bowie deemed too shitty to be released by him, so he let this schmuck do it.
I found this to be not good. That is all. Sorry liad bud
I’m sure this was a hoot in 1964, but it’s just kind of meh for me.
I’d like to start by saying untitled2 is one of the finest dancers I’ve ever seen, and when he said he doesn’t like to dance in his last review, not only was he lying, he was shaming all of mankind with his deception. The way he can make that tall, thin frame turn into something majestic is simply art in motion. He doesn’t merely dance to the music, he becomes it. Now, he may shield that part of himself from the world, weary of what society will think. But deep down, I know he loves that rush he gets when his feet start tapping to a fresh beat. His ankles start clapping and his shins start shaking. His thighs become drums and his waist becomes a spinning top. Nothing can hide that inner dancer forever untitled2, nothing. Now onto Bowie. There once was a little boy. He was very curious, always searching for answers to his questions and simply hating the expected. This hatred of the expected translated to his music listening habits, where he would shuffle his entire music library. He despised playlists. More on that later though. This boy also despised reading, he was much more of a one book per summer kind of guy. One summer, he decided to read the book on the reading list with the least amount of pages with words: Hugo Cabret. It quickly became a summer staple, due to its lengthy amount of pictures and due to the fact it was an amazing story. A redemption story wrapped in a heartfelt connection between an old man and a boy. After reading this book, the boy was clawing for more. Coincidentally, the author released another book: Wonderstruck, another absolutely amazing book. And yes, it had a ton of pictures too, so it became the second book for the summer when the teachers began requiring more than one. Also of note though, is that Wonderstruck briefly mentions “Space Oddity”, Bowie’s greatest ever track. Now, this curious little boy naturally wanted to know what this song sounded like. The description seemed interesting enough. So, he listened to it, and wow, he was charmed. The guy from Labrinyth made THIS?! He couldn’t believe it. Fast forward a few years and this kid realizes that 70’s rock and pop is the greatest sounding music known to man. The hooks are simply unmatched. He begins seeking answers to the best of the best, and one repetitive answer on every list is Starman, which quickly becomes this boy’s new favorite song. He listens to it an unhealthy amount, more than he looks at the 2016 SI Swim Edition, which is saying a lot. He wonders if maybe, is there more? If this is so good, how does the rest of the album play? And so begins his fetish for albums. Straight from Five Years, he knows he’s hit solid gold. This album will not disappoint. It becomes a favorite, especially with its iconic album cover. Fast forward a couple years and this boy is rewatching A Knight’s Tale, an absolute classic. (Sir Ulreich Van Lichenstein, the protector of Italian virginity!) He hears Golden Years, shocked that it’s in a medieval movie, but dismissing that fact due to its undeniable grooviness. He plays it day and night, shifting his hips into high gear and back into low gear like a teen driver in a manual transmission (he doesn’t have untitled2’s dance moves). After hearing this magical song, he finally assumes that Bowie is one of the greatest of all time, since all three of these pivotal tracks were on seperate albums. He searches for answers to the best albums and finds a book titled “1001 Albums to Listen to Before You Die”. He quickly adds every Bowie album in this list to his library. However, like most things in this boy’s life, he experiences burnout and quits, so the albums went without dusting for years. Or did they? Let’s remember this boy’s music listening habits. He shuffles his entire library. So, today when his roommate, Conor Clapton, began playing Aladdin Sane, this boy didn’t expect to recognize any of it. However, he knew every track to his surprise. All this time, he thought those Bowie albums were wasting away, when in reality they were playing sporadically, and they were all so good they stuck with him in his head and he bobbed along to the tunes of this legend. One last note, Bowie is in one of my all-time favorite movies and he’s amazing (no, not Labyrinth, The Prestige). The man could act, sing, and he did it his way. He was a true original, and a true inspiration to me. I’m so happy we finally got a Bowie. Also, in the film “Life Aquatic of Steve Zissou”, there are various points where a random Brazilian singer performs a Bowie song in Portuguese. His name is Seu Jorge and he actually released an entire album of him playing Bowie tracks with just a guitar and it’s honestly the best Bowie covers you’ll find. It’s a refreshing take on all of them and sounds like therapy for your ears. (Check it out). Another update, this weekend I watched “Ticket to Paradise” and after it finished, Peacock started playing “Couples Retreat” afterwards. The opening credits had a delectable song, and naturally I looked it up to listen to it more, and it was a Bowie track. It’s “Modern Love”, which got me thinking how this man made consistently good music from 1969 to 2016 uninterrupted. He changed with the times while staying himself. Seriously, go listen to his 90’s music right now. You’re going to be all like “damn, Bowie made good 90’s music? What the eff?!” There aren’t many 70’s artists who can say they kept their dignity intact through the 80’s, but he pulled it off!
an all time favorite of mine. The music is simply extraordinary.
I love Stevie Wonder but I always avoided this album because the album cover is so boring in comparison to his others. Also, I assumed “Superstition” was the heart and soul of it, and I’m glad to say I was wrong. About the Superstition thing, not the album cover.
I woke up shaking, my face soaking from the constant stream of sweat pouring down it. A soft whisper left my mouth, so depressed that it was insusceptible to any normal human ear aiming to obtain its echo. I said it again, but louder, and yet it still was but a passing wind to most mortal creatures. I repeated again, louder, “three”. I kept crying out, louder, and louder, “THREE! THREE!! THREE!!!!!!”. I was bellowing it out now, waking up the neighbor’s murderous cat. “THREE!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”. Then, one last time for all the marbles, I screamed until the lights came on and the dawn had aged into a new day, “THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”.
Half this album was great, the other half felt like when you lend a pencil to a kid in your class who you don’t know well. You wonder to yourself, do I seek the pencil out? Do I ask for it back? How much effort do I need to show for one seemingly unimportant pencil? Do the answers to these questions change if the subject changes from a pencil to a pen? What about if the subject becomes a half-broken toaster which only toasts one side? How much do the answers to my questions alter then? How much pride is required for our possessions which don’t necessarily prove their worth consistently? In this specific case, I lent my time to Nirvana for a finite amount of time. They knew it was mine, they acknowledged their gratitude and used it for the time given. However, when the 49 minutes were over, they did not give it back to me. They rushed away, either to speed to freedom or because they were unaware of their burglary. Either way, my time was swapped out like the statuette in Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark, replaced only with a worthless bag of sand. Shame on you Nirvana, for all your hair flips and addicting tracks, you had even more songs which felt like digging dip into wet sand. It continues to cave in, replacing your progress with hopelessness. I don’t mean to say that your bad tracks made me feel anything, because while they did make me feel one thing, it was merely that I longed for them to end. Thanks for the good ones though, they sort of make it worth it.
Very screamy, some tracks started off nice but then the whiny voice came in and it went to sh**. The beginning of “Ocean Size” reminded me of “Flowers for Zoe” by Lenny Kravitz, so when I was listening to this album for the fourth time and heard the similarity again, I decided to ditch it and listen to “Mama Said” by Lenny Kravitz so I could enjoy my time.
The first half was a 5, second half was a 3. I really wanted to give this a 5, but I couldn’t. Similar to Aladdin Sane, I didn’t expect to know much of this going in, but it turned out I knew almost every track due to the album being in my library for years. When I first started this album years ago, I audibly laughed at Anthony Kiedis rapping on the first track and stopped right there. However, after many viewings of one of my favorite movies, Point Break, which features Kiedis in a minor role, I’ve grown to love the rapping. Kiedis literally starts singing gibberish in the first track and we can’t handle some rapping? Also, when I found out the creepy looking dude from Back to the Future was in Red Hot Chili Peppers, I view them in a better light. When I listen to Kiedis sing and rap and speak in gibberish, it is honestly so relatable. I spend a good chunk of my days doing the exact same thing, only I don’t have Flea to back me up on bass. Combined with the fact that this album brought the original band back together, it’s one hell of a ride and I had so much fun for the first half, one of the highlights of this generator for sure.
Public Enemy walked so the Brookline Public School System could run.
I felt like I was eating at Cracker Barrel with my family after a long day of shopping at the Wrentham Outlets. YEEEHAWWWW, DRY PANCAKES AND SYRUP PLEASE!
“My mom used to be a jeans model, so y’know.😉”
Courtney Love’s nips couldn’t save this from feeling like I was taking a shower with a low pressure faucet. Hole went completely Hollywood here with the music, lyrics, and album cover. They also went completely Hollywood by choosing their new producer over their original drummer, who gave Live Through This most of its heart.
Can someone please explain the love for The Stooges? This sh** is terrible. The vocals are laugh-out-loud funny and the music is nothing to write home about.
weird that they chose the album cover for the clean version. This was produced by Dr. Dre and it always sounded like an extension of 2001 to me. I can't listen to Stan a single more time.
This tried to be hard, but it came off as really goofy. I’ve never been a fan of Ice Cube as a rapper, and some of his rhymes in this are laughable. Not a bad actor though.
2001 is an all time favorite of mine and was literally the only music I listened to in 7th grade. When I first listened to this one years ago, I was so excited because it was 2001’s predecessor but it really let me down. Therefore, I didn’t expect to like this very much, and it’s bordering on 1 territory. The crazy thing is that I wouldn’t hesitate to give its sequel a 5 and it only came out 7 years later.
This sounds like something a Feminist Studies professor at Smith College would make.
I got two words for you: Mariano. Rivera. grrrrrrrr Mondays.
they tried really hard to make me not like this music. “You did please me some of the time.”
this felt like it was made by ChatGPT.
this dude really just sang about Neil Young and Lynyrd Skynyrd the whole f***ing time. Was this Neil Young? Wtf did I just spend an hour and a half on?
so this is an album I love, but not top to bottom. Kick, Push, He Say She Say, Sunshine, Daydreamin’, American Terrorist, and Kick, Push II are all iconic to me. This album holds a special place in my heart, and I’m surprised it was on this list. Maybe there is hope for what’s to come… “My first picture was a lineup” - Jay Z, you performed at a Hillary Clinton campaign rally. Britney Spears has more street cred than you at this point. This outro seriously makes me consider dropping it to a 2. Wow. F*** you Lupe. “Shoutout Xhamster.com. That one vid I found on April 23, 2002 was amazing. I’ve searched for it for so long and still haven’t found it. Much love.”
This was one of the few albums I did when I discovered this generator years ago. I’ve listened to Nick Drake’s soothing voice via shuffle for a few years now. It’s a good album, but nothing that gets my panties in a bunch.
The variety of sound is a definite plus for this genre, so I was tempted to give it a 4, but I don’t think I can. A very strong 3. An addicting album that pleasantly surprised me. It’s a 4 at heart, but a 3 on paper.
It’s a pretty good album. They want to be The Smiths so bad.
I urge everyone, men and women, to go commando. I know you may be thinking, “that’s poor hygiene!” Well, actually it’s not. It’s actually more hygienic because underwear is a hot bed for bacteria. When you’re commando, your jennies have room to breathe. Also, it feels much more freeing and there’s a sense of loving your body and living proudly in it when you go commando. I task everyone with trying to go commando. Try one day, one week, one month, one year. Whatever let’s you sleep at night, hopefully you do that naked as well but that’s besides the point. Try it out in jeans, khakis, dress pants, sweatpants, daisy dukes, whatever the hell you want. Trust me, you’re gonna like it more than you think.
It could have been a 3 if the songs didn't outlast their welcome almost every time. Sometimes, you just gotta send the song.
Mid album, bangers and clangers, meaning the songs are either awesome or possum. I can’t envision the group liking this very much.
This is one of the those 3's that I'll play non-stop for days, addicted to it. It'll remain a 3, but this sucker took me for a ride. What a great album.
One of the first albums I ever bought on vinyl. "Babe I'm Gonna Leave You" used to be my favorite Led Zeppelin song. The last time I listened to this top to bottom was on vinyl years ago. This time, "Your Time is Gonna Come" really stuck out to me.
The only Neil Young album I would choose to listen to if held at wand-point by a power-drunk Bellatrix LeStrange. CINNAMON GIRL.
Ya like Jazz? ;) ...no. I don't know what I was expecting from a track titled, "Shhh/Peaceful", but it somehow wasn't the most boring one.
I miss Adam ;(
Now I REALLY miss Adam ;( "Me & Mr. Jones" starting to feel personal. The first half is brash hits and the second half is sirenic, like a soundtrack for a good dream.
When I listened to the album the first few times, I didn't even play the opening track. I figured that one's great, I already know that. However, on my fourth listen I went through Running Up That Hill... and it isn't even that good. Respect to Kate for being unique and not making it 12 pop songs, but I was bored. Need I remind the authors that this is 1001 ALBUMS I need to listen to, not 1001 songs and the crap that accompanies them on their record.
I know I shouldn’t play the comparison game with these, but in some cases I feel it’s necessary. The Blue Album came out the same year as this, and it absolutely blows this out of the water. This has the much better album cover though, G’work Green Day. Also, nice cameo in This Is 40. Update: I just found out The Blue Album isn’t even in the 1001 albums, which makes this selection even more depressing.
Hot Fuss? More like Cold Complacency. I can't give Mr. Brightside anything over a 2, it'd be a slap in the face to music everywhere. I will say though, it was pretty good.
Let’s address the elephant in the room: Alec Baldwin killed that lady on the set of Rust.
This feels like an homage to 50’s musicals. Now that I’m thinking about it, let's make this a motherf***ing musical: It’s Cleveland in 1972. The son of an Ohio coal-miner longs for more in “Sail Away”. Next, we turn our attention to a Cleveland business mogul in “Lonely at the Top”. He has learned the hard way that being successful isn’t all there is in life. We go back to the son of the Ohio coal-miner in “He Gives Us All His Love”. As he decides to run away from home, he looks back at his father with gratitude, singing about all he’s given up for their family. Later, the Cleveland business mogul has a dream that no one remembers who he is in “Last Night I Had a Dream”. He wakes up and finds that it was just a dream, but grows concerned with the meaning. He soon finds out that his father, who he had a complicated relationship with, has passed away. As the coal-miner’s son makes his way to the city of Cleveland on a bus, he stops in a bar. There, he does a number called “Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear” with drunk patrons as they wish him good luck in the big city. We turn our attention back to the business mogul at his father’s funeral. Feeling lonelier than ever, he sings “Old Man”. He now has no one. Next, we go back to the coal-miner’s son on the bus. He runs into another coal-miner and they sing a ditty called “Political Science”, remarking that no one likes a coal-miner, despite them doing the hard work to keep society chugging along. Back to the business mogul, as he now faces a deep evil. Without anyone in his life, the last connection he feels is with the city of light, city of magic, his city, Cleveland. A company is attempting to get approval for dumping waste into Cuyahoga River. Our business mogul knows he must stop this company and do something to save the city his father taught him to love, singing “Burn On” to showcase it. Back to the coal-miner’s son. Or should I say, back to his father, as he learns his son has run away. He begins singing “Memo to My Son”, explaining that he believes his son will do well in the big city if he keeps his head screwed on right. He’s proud of him for running away. Back to the business mogul as he stands up in front of the local congress in Town Hall. He begins to reminisce about old times. How you could be best friends with an entire city, before everything become about moving fast and building up. His nostalgia appeals to the congress and the entire Town Hall breaks out into applause as he finishes singing “Dayton, Ohio - 1903”. They decide there will be no dumping waste into the river. Back to the coal-miner’s son as he finally arrives in the city of Cleveland. At the first diner he sits in, he spots the most gorgeous woman he’s ever seen in his eighteen years of living. He’s infatuated, and she teases him with “You Can Leave Your Hat On”. The two kiss and she asks to go back to his place. He’s only just gotten off the bus from rural Ohio! She scoffs and walks away. With a goofy smile, he realizes he’s made it. Back to the business mogul as he packs his bags to leave the city he loves so much. He’s given them everything, he realizes, and now it is time to go. He needs to find a new reason to live. Maybe that’s a woman, kids, he’ll never know until he tries. He walks out the door as “God’s Song (That’s Why I Love Mankind” finishes. As one Cleveland man leaves, another arrives. One legacy set in stone, another brewing with potential. Such is the City of Light, City of Magic. Cleveland calls us all. Fade to Black.
It was boring, but relatively nice on my ears, like a funny science teacher.
If this were a Harry Potter movie, it'd be The Chamber of Secrets. It's a great genre, and the sound is good. But, it just isn't as good as the other albums from this era and style.
One, two, three, four It has a little more Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten I love you M G M T Time to Pretend for you and me M G M T I love you Bom bom bom bompa bom The Handshake, bompa bom Pieces of What, bompa bom Weekend Wars, bompa bom Look at me More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits Moons, Birds, Monsters Why are some Kids fosters? Pink, brown, yellow, orange, and blue I love you More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits Bom bom bom bompa bom Future Reflections, bompa bom The Youth, bompa bom 4th Dimensional Transition, bompa bom Look at me More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits More than the hits
100th album. Let's hope it doesnt blow. It wasn't awful, but it was astoundingly forgettable, like an unfunny science teacher.
C- Personality Crisis - 2. Looking For a Kiss - 2. Vietnamese Baby - 3. Lonely Planet Boy - 2. Frankenstein - 3. Trash - 3. Bad Girl - 1. Subway Train - 3 Pills - 1 Private World - 2 Jet Boy - 2
Funeral and The Suburbs are two of my favorite albums, but I’ve never given this one a go. Hopefully it’s good. Black Mirror - 5. Keep the Car Running - 4. Neon Bible - 4. Intervention - 4. Black Wave/Bad Vibrations - 4. Ocean of Noise - 4. The Well and the Lighthouse - 4. (Antichrist Television Blues) - 3. Windowsill - 3. No Cars Go - 5. My Body Is a Cage - 5. No Cars Go is on Arcade Fire EP, which I’ve listened to for years, so it was the only song I knew. Oddly enough, that EP came out in 2003 and this album came out in 2007. It’s interesting that they tossed it on this album after so many years. Black Mirror quickly became one of my favorite Arcade Fire songs. Thank you generator.
C Radio Free Europe - 2 Pilgrimage - 2 Laughing - 2 Talk About the Passion - 2 Moral Kiosk - 2 Perfect Circle - okay, this is an actual sleep aid 1. Catapult - 3 Sitting Still - 2 9-9 - 1 Shaking Through - 3 We Walk - 5 West of the Fields - 2
C- Darklands - 2 Deep One Perfect Morning - 2 Happy When it Rains - 2 Down on Me - 3 Nine Million Rainy Days - 2 April Skies - 2 Fall - 2 Cherry Came Too - 2 On the Wall - 2 About You - 3
There are worse things to listen to while fetching discs in a field on a rainy Saturday morning, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a 1. This thing almost Stockholm Syndrome’d me into giving it a 2 thanks to the unforgivable run time of 2 hours, but I didn’t succumb. I tried to go song by song, but when discus throwers are hurling discs at you, it makes it hard to look at your phone and I’ll be damned if I listen to this for another run through. D Grand Ole Opry Song - 1 Keep on the Sunny Side - 2 Nashville Blues - 3 You Are My Flower - 2 The Precious Jewel - 1 Dark As a Dungeon - 1 Tennessee Stud - 1 This is all I got through but there were plenty more 1’s after this, I assure you.
I've never seen this album cover, truth be told, but Max Jr. is a big fan. (I wanna smack it so bad). This was the first Strokes album I listened to as a whole, and it's my favorite. In my mind, their other ones can't really compete with this guy. I listened to this for the first time two Aprils ago, so it's fitting that I come full circle with it at the end of this beautiful month.
Woah. Big Boy. 2nd highest rated album in the entire generator. If we try hard enough, we could either move it down to third or up to first. Second Hand News - Opening tracks can make or break an album for me since first impressions are everything. This one was pretty meh. 3 Dreams - sounds like a gypsy getting circumcised under the many moons of Tatooine. In all seriousness, I've heard this sucker about 1,000 times and it's obviously a great track. 5 Never Going Back Again - another one I've heard a good amount. Better than I remembered. 4 Don't Stop - this album feels like a compilation album since it's hit after hit. I'm curious what I would rate this if it were my first listen. 3 Go Your Own Way - 5. Songbird - Pretty boring. 3. The Chain - Awesome Mix Vol. 2 anyone? 5. You Make Loving Fun - the George Harrison of Fleetwood Mac ain't too shabby. 4 I Don't Want to Know - 4. Oh Daddy - Fantastic. 4. Gold Dust Woman - There's just so much going on in these songs, which is why they're more than hits. They're actually contemplative. 5.
holy f*** this week has been amazing. A Movin' Out (Anthony's Song) - 5. The Stranger - literally 3 songs in one. 5. Just the Way You Are - so 70s. 4. Scenes From An Italian Restaurant - 4. Vienna - 5. Only the Good Die Young - 4. She's Always a Woman - 4. Get It Right the First Time - 5. Everybody Has a Dream - 3. The whistling deserves a 5, but I have to give it a 4. My heart wants to give it a 5, but my brain knows it's a 4. After re-listening multiple times over the weekend, both Scenes From An Italian Restaurant and She’s Always a Woman went up by 1 each. Therefore, Billy gets a 5. Whistle on, my Jewish friend.
D+ Heartattack and Vine - bad voice, boring music, 1. In Shades - really generator? Really? 1. Saving All My Love For You - 3. Downtown - 2. Jersey Girl - 2. ‘Til the Money Runs Out - 1 On the Nickel - 1 Mr. Siegal - 1 Ruby’s Arms - 2 His voice is HORRENDOUS. I cannot stress that enough. HOWEVER, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't tapping my feet throughout the album.
C+ One Hundred Years - 4. A Short Term Effect - 3. The Hanging Garden - 3. Siamese Twins - 2. The Figurehead - 2. A Strange Day - 3. Cold - 2. Pornography - 2.
D Ace of Spades - 2. Love Me Like a Reptile - 2. Shoot You in the Back - 2. Live to Win - 2. Fast and Loose - 2. (We Are) The Road Crew - 2. Fire Fire - 1. Jailbait - 1. Dance - 1. Bite the Bullet - 1. The Chase is Better Than The Catch - 1. The Hammer - 1. This was one amorphous blob of screaming and mediocre guitar riffs. There wasn't anything interesting or creative going on.
C- Strange Feelin’ - 3 Buzzin’ Fly - 2 Love from Room 109 At the Islander (On Pacific Coast Highway) - 3. Dream Letter - 3. Gypsy Woman - 2. Sing a Song for You - 2. Sounds like a soundtrack for doing shrooms, which I actually liked. I liked it more than the rating would suggest, but it just never really varied.
C- 1969 - 2 I Wanna Be Your Dog - 3 We Will Fall - 3 No Fun - 2 Real Cool Time - 1 Ann - 3 Not Right - 2 Little Doll - 1 The only thing memorable about this album is that it came out in 1969 aka the most important year for Rock. At least these schmucks agreed to make it less than 36 min. I hate The Stooges due to the fact they are not talented. However, every now and then they miraculously string together sounds that aren’t terrible. This album had more not-terrible moments than I could have ever imagined. Thank you 1969 (the year) for sprinkling some quality on what would’ve been an otherwise poor album.
C+ Be(Intro) - 3 The Corner - 3 Go! - 3 Faithful - 4 Testify - 3 Love Is… - 2 Chi City - 2 The Food (Live) - 3 Real People - 3 They Say - 2 It’s Your World, Pt. 1 & 2 - 2 Returned to this with my new anti-Kanye lens and guess what? They (didn't) got better! MWahahahaha. It's a reference to- nvm I'll just drop the link: https://www.tiktok.com/@krantzcke/video/7192553832679935278 . It'd take too much to describe. Hopefully that link lives in. Otherwise, this review will make no sense.
D+ Statesboro Blues - 2 Done Somebody Wrong - 3 Stormy Monday - 2 You Don’t Love Me - 1 Hot ‘Lanta - 2 In Memory of Elizabeth Reed - 2 Whipping Post - 1 Incredibly boring and too long. Multiple songs over 10 minutes? Seriously? And this live album BS. I don't care if I can hear the crowd cheer every now and then. It adds NOTHING. Record you sh** in the studio and keep your tracks under 6 minutes.
A- Taxman - 3. Never liked this intro. Eleanor Rigby - 5. One of the greatest standalone tracks of all time. I’m Only Sleeping - 5. Headline: Local High Schooler Feels. Love You To - 3. I never liked George with the sitar. Here, There and Everywhere - 5. Yellow Submarine - 5. Always loved the ad-libs. She Said She Said - 3. At least Ringo gets to show off here. Good Day Sunshine - 4. And Your Bird Can Sing - 3. For No One - 5. My favorite Revolver track. Doctor Robert - 3. I Want to Tell You - 4. Got to Get You Into My Life - 5. Tomorrow Never Knows - 3.
D Roadrunner - 2 Astral Plane - 2 Old World - 1 Pablo Picasso - 1 She Cracked - 2 Hospital - 1 Someone I Care About - 1 Girlfriend - 1 Modern World -2 Dignified and Old - 1 I’m Straight - 1 Government Center -2 I Wanna Sleep in Your Arms -2 Dance With Me - 1 This is one of the worst albums I’ve heard in recent memory. I couldn’t believe the sh** I was hearing. Boring, bad vocals, laughably simple lyrics. You could give a fifth grader a tambourine and a recorder and he’d concoct a better album for you.
C Excursions - 3 Buggin’ Out - 2 Rap Promoter - 2 Butter - 3 Verses from the Abstract - 2 Show Business - 2 Vibes and Stuff - 2 Infamous Date Rape - 2 Check the Rhime - 2 Everything Is Fair - 2 Jazz (We’ve Got) - 2 Skypager - 2 What? - 2 Scenario (LP Mix) - 5 This was actually much better than I expected. Scenario was the only track I'd listened to before, and one I'm very familiar with. I always view Tribe as white people's favorite rap group and I feel like Tribe would be disgusted by that sentiment. Progressive High School English teachers wax poetic about these guys. It's usually the same teachers who apologize for being white to the non-white students.
C The Girl From Ipanema - 4, starting off with a banger? Ballsy. Dindi - 2 Change Partners - 2 Quiet Nights of Quiet Stars - 2 Meditation - 2 If You Never Come to Me - 2 How Insensitive - 3 I Concentrate On You - 2 Baubles, Bangles, and Beads - 2 Once I Loved - 2 I love Sinatra, and he's a pretty good actor too, but these were just a collection of slow, boring songs. It starts way too strong with The Girl from Ipanema, a certified classic. After that, it's your run-of-the-mill slow Sinatra love songs. Maybe it's because I'm not a 75 year old female, but my panties stayed right where they are.
D+ Dirty Boots - 2 Tunic (Song for Karen) - 2 Mary-Christ - 2 Kool Thing - 1 Mote - 1, would’ve been two if it was half the length My Friend Goo - 1 Disappearer - 2 Mildrid Pierce - 2 Cinderella’s Big Score - 1 Scooter and Jinx - 1 Titanium Expose - 2 I’m so tired of these sh** 2’s. I’ve had like eight 2’s in the last 24 hours. These albums are so uninspiring. At least this one has a great album cover. In the wise words of Anton Ego, “ you know what I'm craving? A little perspective. That's it. I'd like some fresh, clear, well seasoned perspective.” Since you’re all out, Generator, you provide the music and I’ll provide the perspective. As for Sonic Youth, they should stick to the vintage t-shirt business and quit music.
B- Hanging on the Telephone - 2 One Way Or Another - 4 Picture This - 3 Fade Away and Radiate - 3 Pretty Baby - 3 I Know but I Don’t Know - 2 11:59 - 5 Will Anything Happen - 3 Sunday Girl - 3 Heart of Glass - 4 I’m Gonna Love You Too - 2 Just Go Away - 2 It took a lot of listens before I rated, and I’m honestly shocked this got a 3. This had 2 written all over it, but it really surprised me. 11:59 was fantastic and I’m excited to come back to it. Other than the hits, it was a solid album and a refreshing listen compared to the sh** I’ve endured recently.
C+ Wheels of Confusion / The Straightener - 3. Starting an album with an 8 min song is BOLD. And guess what? It doesn't pay off. Tomorrow's Dream - 2. Changes - 5. Obviously. Fun fact - I used this in the first screenplay I ever wrote. FX - 2. Supernaut - 2. Snowblind - 4. nice twist at the end. Cornucopia - 3. Laguna Sunrise - 3. Nice. St. Vitus Dance - 2. Under the Sun / Every Day Comes and Goes - 3. I was gonna give a 2 but they got me by the end. All in all, a pretty good album for the genre. A little repetitive. Changes is a classic. Snowblind is a track that I'd never heard and really liked. Laguna Sunrise was a hoot too. Black Sabbath is so much better than other metal.
B- Dark Fantasy - Kanye is usually the worst part of his songs and the best part of other people’s songs. This holds true. 3. Gorgeous - boring. The guitar riff gets pretty old by the third minute. 3. Power - 5. All of the Lights (Interlude) - 2. All of the Lights - 4. Monster - 2. Nicki bumped this down from a 3. So Appalled - 2. Devil in a New Dress - 4. Runaway - the guitar at the end sounds like the South Park sh** sound. 3. Hell of a Life - 2. Blame Game - “Yeezy taught you well” YIKES. This was so cringy. 1. Lost In The World - 5. Who Will Survive in America - 3. Returning to this anti-Semite’s album made me feel like Stan when he turns 10. Everything was so much shittier than I remembered.
C- Rock ‘n’ Roll Star - 2, I don’t like the Oasis sound. At all. This is the epitome of an Oasis song. Ugh. Shakermaker - 2 Live Forever - 2 Up in the Sky - 2 Columbia - 2 Supersonic - 2 Bring It on Down - 2 Cigarettes and Alcohol - 2 Digsy’s Dinner - 2 Slide Away - 2 Married With Children - 2 This thing was a pure 2. Walking the tightrope with shit on one side and pretty good on the other, this was as mediocre as they come. I think I'm too depressed and angry a person to like Oasis.
C+ Beetlebum - 4 Song 2 - 5, it may be corny to some listeners, but this song is entangled with soccer culture, as one of the most memorable FIFA songs of all time. Country Sad Ballad Man - 3 M.O.R. - 2 On Your Own - 2 Theme from Retro - 3 You’re So Great - 2 Death of a Party - 3, sounds like an unreleased Smiths track Chinese Bombs - 1 I’m Just a Killer for Your Love - 2 Look Inside America - 2 Strange News From Another Star - 2 Movin’ On - 2 Essex Dogs - 2 I expected worse based on the reviews. On the day it was chosen for us, I saw it and was somewhat excited. I knew the hits but I was curious for more. It didn't give much more, but its better than these wingbats (woofmeow and Connor Clapton) have said.
B- The Shining - 3 Everybody’s Stalking - 4 Bewilder - 2 Fall in a River - 3 Camping Next to Water - 4 Stone on the Water - 3 Another Pearl - 3 Body Rap - 2 Once Around the Block - 3 This Song - 2 Beewilderbeast- 2 Magic in the air - 3 Cause a rockslide 2 Pissing in the Wind - 4 Blistered Heart 2 Disillusion 3 Say it again - 5 Epitaph 4 I absolutely loved this. It completely knocked me off my feet. I have listened through probably twenty times already. I am excited to check out the artist more.
D+ Sleep on the Left Side 3 Brimful of Asha 3 Butter the Soul 2 Chocolat 1 We’re in Yr Corner 1 Funky Days Are Sick Again 2 What is Happening? - 1 When the Light Appears Boy - 1 Coming Up - 1 Good Shi** - 2 Good to Be on the Road Back Home - 2 It’s Indian Tobacco My Friend - 2 Candyman - 2 State Troopers PT 1 - 1 Norwegian Wood - 3, honestly very good Beatles cover This was pretty brutal. Started off pretty good, but just dips so hard. Not a big fan of the Southern Asia sound.
D+ If I Should Fall From Grace with God - 1 Turkish Song of the Damned - 2 Bottle of Smoke - 1 Fairytale of New York - 3 Metropolis - 2 Thousands Are Sailing - 2, tell me this ain’t Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Fiesta - 2 Medley: the Recruiting Sergeant / the Rocky Road to Dublin / Galway Races - 2 Streets of Sorrow / Birmingham Six - 2 Lullaby of London - 2 Sit Down By the Fire - 2 The Broad Majestic Shannon - 1 Worms - 2 As expected, The Pogues are an embarrassment to music everywhere, except Ireland. Bloody torturous, innit?
C- Let Me Drown - 2 My Wave - 2, sounds like knock-off Nirvana Fell On Black Days - 2, snoozefest Mailman - 2 Superunknown - 2 Head Down - 4 Black Hole Sun - 3 Spoonman - 2 Limo Wreck - 2 The Day I Tried to Live - 2 Kickstand - 1 Fresh Tendrils - 1 4th of July - 2 Half - 1 Like Suicide - 2 This mostly sounded like a worse version of Nirvana. However, Head Down and Black Hole Sun were awesome. I'm so glad I heard them. I didn't expect to like this at all, so coming away with not one, but two really good tracks in a major win in my book.
C- All the Way From Memphis - 2 Whizz Kid - 3 Hymn for the Dudes - 2 Honaloochie Boogie - 3 Violence - 2 Drivin’ Sister - 2 Ballad of Mott the Hoople - 2 I’m a Cadillac / El Camino Dolo Roso - 1, there’s 5 min left and I’m already bored I Wish I Was Your Mother - 2 If you told me this was David Bowie, I’d believe you. However, that doesn't mean it was good. It was extremely boring, which seems ironic because how could something be extreme and boring at the same time. Well, I'll tell you: a group of guys made a band and wanted to sound like David Bowie. The only problem? They aren't David Bowie. It's like if someone restored the body of a vintage Mustang, but put a Prius engine under the hood. They don't the It factor that Bowie does. They aren't weird or flashy enough.
D+ Pristeen - 1 Double Vegetation - 2 East Easy Rider - 1 Promised Land - 2 Hanging Out and Hung Up On the Line - 2 Safesurfer - 3 If You Loved Me At All - 2 Drive, She Said - 2 Soldier Blue - 2 You… - 2 Not Raving But Drowning - 2 Head - 2 Leperskin - 2 Beautiful Love - 2 Western Front 1992 C.E. - 2 Hung Up and Hanging Out to Dry - 2 The American Lite - 2 Las Vegas Basement - 2 I seriously don't understand how some of these albums make it on to here. 1001 albums isn't that many in the grand scheme of things. There are so many albums more deserving. This wasn't bad, but it was just boring, much like most of these albums.
D White Dress - 1 Chemtrails Over the Country Club - 2 Tulsa Jesus Freak - 2 Let Me Love You Like a Woman - 2 Wild at Heart - 2 Dark But Just a Game - 3 Not All Who Wander Are Lost - 2 Yosemite - 1, I hate how 2021 this sounds Breaking Up Slowly - 2 Dance Till We Die - 2 For Free - 2 Mathematically, this should be a 2. I really thought I was going to give this a 2. However, I'm laying here listening to this sh** over and over again and the only feeling I feel is anger. This album is the least distinct we've gotten yet. Basic genre, basic country of origin, basic musical style, and it came out in 2021. This doesn't even hold up against 2021 albums, and I barely like any current music. Lana treats it like her own personal ASMR, while leaving her genuinely good singing voice on the cutting room floor. The opening track is laughably bad. I was LOL'ing harder than a mental patient on nitrous oxide when she said, "downatthemeninmusicbusinessconference." Seriously? I know Stargirl is popular, but why tf are you so famous?! F*** this album, f*** Lana Del Rey and f*** her fans more than anything.