Reviews (page 9 of 10)
Not something I ever have or ever would choose to listen to but the hits still sound OK to me. Rest of it though, meh.
Two stars for the hits which can be fun, but this album really represents everything that I hate about the commercialization of music. Everything sounds so overproduced and phony.
Full Disclosure 1: In middle school, I wore the t shirt. This was 1987. Full Disclosure 2: I, like millions of kids, loved those rock guitars. Full Disclosure 3: Even then, I only listened to three of the songs on this album. I felt the rest were, a term that was new to me in 1987, "filler". Full Disclosure 4: I have always found Bruce Fairbairn's production to suck the life out of any musical statement. Christ, the man got paid for that horn sound. The guitar sound is powerless overdrive. The vocals sound enthusiastic without actually being enthusiastic. The drum and bass sounds are best described as the "impression of bass and drums". Wrap it up, pack it out and ship it Platinum. Fairbairn has created the "impression of rock" without any actual rocking. RIP Bruce Fairbairn. Fuck that guy. Full Disclosure 5: I love dumb rock. I really do. Slade is one of my faves. I'm self-loathing KISS fan (see Ron Nevison's impression of Fairbairn on Crazy Nights)… Secondly, I haven't listened to any of this, either ironically or not, since about 1988, maybe early 1989, and despite the baggage, I wanted to give this a fair shake; I still love early Ratt, Look What the Cat Dragged In gives me the feels, so I wasn't coming with the critical punk-snark. I really wasn't. So Here We Go: Bon Jovi "Slippery When Wet", Polygram, 1987 Cover: The original art, featuring the kind of swimsuit cheesecake you would have found in full poster glory at the local Spencers, was deemed too "racy". If that shit was racy to you, then you'll probably love this record. Side One: 1. "Let It Rock": A keyboard intro, hinting at something in the Deep Purple/Rainbow epic tradition gives way to something to Cop show hard rock about good times while accidentally hinting at a world view like "Watching the Wheels" in the most boorish way possible. 2. "You Give Love a Bad Name": One of the classics that I might have conceded its classic status around 5000 listens ago but like someone who drank themselves sober, I can only finding it grating in sound and lifeless in execution. There is no doubt these guys can play and Jon can sing and write. Listening to this instant cliché, you never can tell. 3. "Livin' on a Prayer": More impression of Hard Rock, with a hard luck narrative knicked from Springsteen and a shouty chorus that has all the catchiness wrung out of it by Fairbairn. 4. "Social Disease" : Wikipedia said Aerosmith wanted this. And why not? It has the signature shitty horn sound that makes post Rehab Aerosmith suggestive of Rock, but without actual Rocking. 5. "Wanted Dead or Alive": Can't say too much here. All the fruit lined up. Stay Gold, Pony Boy. Side Two 1. "Raise Your Hands": Just the suggestion of Rock. 2. "Without Love": [14 year old C.V] "I wouldn't wish this turd on Taylor Dane". 3. "I'd Die for You": Layer Cake Schmaltz clinically tested to create singing and dancing in really stupid people. 4. "Never Say Goodbye": The kind of prom song that wants you to be nostalgic for your now, rose tinting sepia impressions that become precious memories for later. If this describes you, you peaked Senior Year. 5. "Wild in the Streets": More suggestions of Rock. So the "Suggestion of Rock", or "The Impression of Rock" certainly nods to Derrida, but I don't feel like exploring that implication any further, lest I parlay my sobriety into mega church attendance and Trump support. No, no more semiotics here. At no time did I have feel anything with this music. I entertained myself by writing criticism. That's really all this was--an exigence to write about something from my past, to see if it evoked anything. Revised art was of a wet , apparently unused trash bag. Sums up my feelings really well. Suggests, but ultimately empty.
Not my thing
Pretty dull stadium rock
It's whatever. Not an essential listen.
Hvis jeg skal høre puddelrock, og det er et stort HVIS, så skal det være Bon Jovi. Det er cheesy, men der er også en uimodståelig charme og catchyness på nogle af numrene. Albummet mangler ikke hits. You Give Love A Bad Name, Living On A Prayer og Wanted Dead Or Alive står ud på albummet. Men resten virker som blege versioner af samme sange og gør særligt B siden til én lang ørkenvandring i hårmetallens klichéer. Og kan vi så lige snakke om keyboardspillet på I’d Die For You… Det er ikke 1-1 Runaway fra deres debut. Men det er godt nok lidt for tæt på.
Oh boy was this familiar. Strident glitzy music - music of a time. It was my time but during this album my time got mixed up with the trashier humans I spent time with. It seems the whole album was always on high radio rotation during my youth; the songs are so familiar. Optimistically, as familiar as sunshine, beaches, sunscreen and sunburn. Looking a bit closer, it's more like the familiar of sunburn, driving beat up old cars, sadness and hangovers, with a side notes of burnt asphalt, bad crushes and stale beer. It's definitely flavoured with frantic teenager energy being exerted from a weekend of social posing, followed by the tired Sunday, the money poured into the local bar/nightclub/pizza store, and the late Sunday moody feelings, wondering, how do I fit. Listen to Bon Jovi? I dunno - Iet's try music therapy. It's those memories I get from this album, but the music? It's ok. Just a bit better than ok, still, I'm unlikely to listen to it again. It was good to return to the memory of sunburn and stale beer though - I don't miss those years at all.
altså... jeg har ikke tænkt mig at benægte at Livin' on a Prayer ikke er en bop......... men den her genre er bare ikke ældet godt overhovedet og den stakkels mand lyder som om det gør ondt på ham at synge. God guitarist ig
Kæft det er dum, men det ville være løgn hvis jeg sagde det ikke er catchy. Specielt Livin on a Prayer (begge dele, både vanvittigt dum og virkelig catchy)
I'm surprised Bon Jovi even has any other albums, because it seems all of his hits are from the first half of this album. Livin' On a Prayer is definitely the best tune here, with Wanted Dead or Alive behind it. The rest of the album doesnt really do anything for me. The music is ok, but nothing unique or impressive enough to stand out for me. Do I enjoy the singles when I catch them on the radio? Sure. Would I ever seek out this album again? Probably not.
Knew this one from my dad. Has some good hits, but just not my taste. Good memories with Never Say Goodbye
Eh
Very 80s
The unfortunate situation where the best songs on the album are overplayed to death. The remaining songs are too bland to revisit, resulting in an album that is just not worth your time, even with the big hits being as big as they are, because you're already tired of them before they've even started.
I don’t like yellinf
Some certified hits but the album sounds like the same song over and over
Don't like hair/glam metal.
Meh
meh
straszny mix, pare spoko, pare nie do sluchania, z kilkoma klasykami (You Give Love A Bad Name, Livin' On A Prayer)
Not really in to this ‘accesible’ metal sound. I’d rather listen to acdc or metallica.
Went back and forth on whether Bon Jovi is better or worse than Backstreet Boys. I think better, but not by a lot. Didn't hate it, but wasn't proud to be listening to it.
Slippery When Wet (1986) - This is the 3rd album from Bon Jovi that pretty much made everyone sit up and take notice. This was the epitome of big hair, big album sales, and big glam rock/pop rock singles. 1986 was a great year for Bon Jovi. I listened to the entire album all the way through and many of the songs are now cringe worthy, cheesy glam rock amd and power ballads. Sadly, what appealed to me in 1986 doesn't have that same appeal now. Why? I think a lot of the songs like "Livin' On a Prayer", "Wanted Dead Or Alive", "I'd Die For You", and "You Give Love A Bad Name" were and still are played and overplayed. If I've heard these songs once I've heard them 100 times. Jon Bon Jovi has vocals you either love or you hate. I'm somewhere in the middle. Richie Sambora on guitar doesn't get any better. With the repeated listen songs like "Raise Your Hands" and "Wild In the Streets" sound great after so many years. There are reasons Slippery When Wet was a #1 album on the US Billboard 200 Chart and certified 12 x Platinum by the RIAA for 12 million copies in the US. Sadly, this album doesn't hold up, doesn't capture me with its songs like it did 38 years ago. It falls flat. 2 stars.
God, there's not much to like about this. Vocals are horrible, so are the wailing guitars and the keyboard elements are sooooooo dated. Lyrics not much cop either. Naff
not for me but it was ok i suppose
Some of the songs are classics, but the album as a whole wasn’t as impressive. I was looking for more variety from song to song. To me it felt like Bon Jovi was perfecting a style of rock and stuck with that style for almost every song, which is respectable, but I prefer albums with some kind of diversity or experimenting of new styles from song to song. like that’s why kanye the goat
Iconic I guess, not too excited. Not great, but not too bad either. Iconic for a reason I guess
Guitar work saves this album. If you have heard one Bon Jovi power ballad then you have heard them all. He found the formula and did not deviate.
There are some pop hits that remain fun. But the whole Bon Jovi schtick is tiresome.
You Give Love a Bad Name, Livin' on a Prayer, and Dead or Alive are all excellent songs, all-time greats even. The rest of this album is pretty boring; Bon Jovi doesn't really vary their music all that much: the lyrics are forgettable, the chords are largely the same, and the sound is the same. I like the sound okay, and I think he perfected it on those three songs. Because of that, this is a fine album, but not a great one. Favorite song is obviously Livin' on a Prayer, but You Give Love a Bad Name is just about as good. Least favorite songs were Social Disease and Wild in the Street.
Another album by another group that all my life I have chosen not to listen to, and this gets filed in the bin of overplayed music. Needless to say I don't really care for or like this and or this style of music. It's just too pop and the image they portray reminds me of jocks in high school that were beloved by all the girls and who looked down on meager fellows like myself, so yeah, even though the lead singer is reputed to be a good guy, I'll just say I'm happy for him having success but I wish it wasn't at the cost of me having to hear these songs over and over and over too many times.
I know people love but not my favorite. Weren’t back in the day and aren’t now.
Overall, I don’t care for it. Never have cared for much of Bon Jovi. I’ve never liked heavy metal, even in my younger days. I do enjoy wanted Dead or Alive, but that’s about it.
Du pas tant bon rock 4.5/10
This album is huge. The big hits are some of the biggest rock songs of the 80’s, and I’ve heard them plenty of time. And I just don’t get it. I never have. Much like I said in my review of Like a Prayer, this prompts zero emotional response in my brain. I’ve listened to hard rock albums that sound very much like this. But there is something that feels off about this. To put it simply, it’s just a little boring and repetitive. The most interesting song is Wanted Dead or Alive, because it breaks away from the sound of the rest of the album, but only slightly. Before I became aware of the music from the 80’s that is actually really good, I used to be very adamant in the sentiment that I didn’t like 80’s music. And when I talk about the generic overplayed and overproduced rock music from this era, this is what I mean. There is just much better rock music from other decades, let alone the 80’s, that I would rather listen to. Rating: 4/10
The most cliché band in rock history. Try me. Just look at the cheese flowing from these grooves; arguably the 3 cheesiest songs of the 80s packed into one 43 minute album. Truly an amazing feat. The lyrics from each of these songs - just take the hits if you want - are just a list of cliches strung together to create huge chant anthems. Honestly - I mean, you can throw a dart at a group of albums to find grade 10 level phrases like this ... bad lyrics are a dime a dozen (<--see what I did there) - but has there ever an album more chock full of thoughtless throwaway bumper-sticker simple stupid slogan lyrics than here? I usually don't care but... I guess I do here. Start the album with "Let It Rock" - please, that's nothing ... "you can't stop a fire raging out of control... if you want to cross that line... " i mean this is just song 1. Before arguably the worst big song ever in "You Give Love A..." (no wait, we had "Pour Some Sugar On Me" last week... no no wait "Wanted Dead or Alive" is only a few tracks away!) which is collegiate-level instruction on how to cookie-cutter an 80s rock song - or current pop song. Hmm... there really is a similarity between Bon Jovi and Taylor Swift... oh "you can't start a fire without a spark" in track 4, did they run out of shitty lyrics already and had to recycle? I'm not being fair, I do love to shit all over this band (and also in full disclosure I remember their first single as a kid and I liked it - "Runaway" - so how was this any different at all, other than EVERYWHERE.) often without thinking - I knew this album would come along one day. It'll sound absurd (and does) but this group edged out what my (loser) group would have called "proper" hard rock - who gives a shit but apparently as a teenager I did. I can throw out some compliments - they can play (although with the incredible production who knows how much this was sliced up - credit to Bruce Fairbairn, this is just as much his album) their instruments. And any guitar solo that can be "sung" is a good and memorable one; Richie Sambora has his share on this. OK much like Def Leppard's 2nd era these guys put out absolutely commercial and *perfect* for-the-era pop rock that just happened to have that snarly pinched-harmonic guitar to put it into the "hard rock" (it wasn't) category. Add in the huge and massively tracked background gang vocals and it all sounds huge and amazing and was brilliant. Hell, it is brilliant. It's a perfectly constructed 1987 album that was a monster I'll give that to them. I just really really don't like this band. The effort made saves this from a 1 although I will now resume shitting on them for eternity. 3/10 2 stars.
Dad rock with undeniably/annoying level of catchiness
5 stars for Livin' on A Prayer, minus 3 stars for everything else being shit
waterboarding by mediocrity
Next 5 songs played by my Spotify Algorithm: The Police - Every Breath You Take Credence Clearwater Revival - Have You Ever Seen the Rain Iron Maiden - Run To the Hills Skid Row - I Remember You Queen - I Want to Break Free
80's hair metal and classic rock in general have such a strange nostalgia for me because that is all my father would listen to. I could never get him to listen to any other genre, it was impossible, and because of that I burnt out of this kind of music before I was even an adult. Don't get me wrong, the certified bangers are amazing but holy shit just listen to the basic ass drum beat and guitar progression in the first song of this album, extremely predictable and absolute snoozefest. Even with instantly recognizable classic rock anthems that almost every english speaking person knows, its hard to give this album a good score. It's just so basic and way too "radio-friendly make me money" to be considered metal. Plus almost every song fades out, what's up with that and 80's music.
Every song has the exact same tempo and feeling. Cheesiest lyrics ever.
I don't think I have ever listened to an entire Bon Jovi album. And after this album, I don't think I ever will. Arguably Bon Jovi's best album... There are a lot of great songs on here. The first half is great! I can totally see why Bon Jovi was huge in the 80s. Great vocals. Killer guitar solos. But as I said the first half is great. The second half is just utter shit. The singles are the only good songs. The other ones are just boring and uninspiring. It started off a 5/5 and ended with a 2/5 solely on how awful the second half was. If there was one redeeming song in the second half; 3/5. But nope. Not for me. I don't hate Bon Jovi but this album being his best? Nah.
The unfortunate situation where the best songs on the album are overplayed to death thanks to classic pop-rock radio stations and minor league sporting games. The remaining songs are too bland to revisit, resulting in an album that is just not worth your time, even with the big hits being as big as they are, because you're already tired of them before they've even started.
Ha ok. Check your brain in at the door. This is no time to be po-faced. I probably wouldn't ever listen to any of this by choice (except for today) but I can't really argue with what it does. First half all well and good. This is so 1986 it almost hurts. Other stuff I might eviscerate for that but for some reason I just can't bring myself to do that to this. All I will say is partway through Raise Your Hands I realised I was bored, and was very much ready for the record to end three songs before the finish. Interesting how much the last song is a massive rip of mid 80s Bruce, fellow New Jersey bloke.
The hits are fun and familiar, but the rest of the album doesn’t do much for me.
Slippery When Wet is one of the albums I was forced to listen to when I was a kid in the late 80s. Overall my opinion of it hasn’t changed. The singles are good, everything else is a poor man’s guns and roses. The closer Wild in the Streets is a poor man’s Bruce Springsteen, they are better when impersonating Bruce than GnR. Maybe that’s only cause Bruce is better. All that being said, if you don’t sing along to Living on a Prayer at the top of your lungs, you are dead inside. 5.5
Bleh.
This is the perfect example of 80s rock music. I've never been a huge Bon Jovi fan. They've got some bangers, but the lyrics are sophomoric, and the subject matter is full of tropes. I can't hate on it entirely, but I wouldn't have revisited this album on my own.
Hair metal is probably the stupidest genre to ever enter this earth
In my book, this is the definition of rock music mediocrity. At the same time, I'll say with a straight face that Livin’ on a Prayer and You Give Love a Bad Name are rather catchy.
I remember very well when this album was getting a lot of airplay. I was in college at the time so it was played at parties too. I didn’t think much of it, good or bad, at the time. Just kind of harmless, sometimes fun, pop. I know there’s a lot of nostalgia for some of these songs in my age group, and that’s always enjoyable to watch. Listening to it now, I have a similar experience. It’s not bad, sometimes fun and catchy, but overall doesn’t do much for me.
Gotta be honest, I did not expect this to start with a Dracula ass keyboard solo. Perhaps I should have. "Livin' on a Prayer," "Wanted Dead or Alive," and "You Give Love a Bad Name" are the pinnacle of hair metal. Arguably that is damning with faint praise, but they are genuinely good. It's just tough to suffer through the rest.
Hu!
"Fuck Jon Bon Jovi" - Steve-o
Hmm... was kind of surprised when this popped up. Robert Dimery must have had some affection for this in order to be included. I'll be amazed if anyone considers this to be their favorite album of all time because it sure as hell is not mine. Yeah, it is anthemic but there are moments throughout that reassures its overall one track minded nature (of course, it was the 80s and spandex worn rock and roll was the rage) and sense of sameness. Uh, it's Slippery When Wet. Yeah, no shit. Favorites: Livin' on a Prayer, Wanted Dead or Alive, Raise Your Hands, Without Love, Wild in the Streets.
ok
YOU'RE LISTENING TO FUCKLER ROCK FM RADIO *eagle sound effect* THE ONLY RADIO STATION WITH BALLS. THIS AIN'T YOUR GRANNY'S MUSIC *explosion sound effect* ROCK SO HARD, YOUR DICK WILL GET HARD AS WELL *Livin' On A Prayer starts playing* Cheesy, fake, plastic, but also kind of endearing in a way. Can't say I'm not glad that Hair Metal is a thing of the distant past now, but it sure was a thing that happened.
2.5
It's shit, I hate it, but it would seem disingenuous to give it 1* as it was defo influential and catchy.
Just not mine, not fish not flesh
Mid
This just kinda fucking sucks
Hit and miss. A few songs are okay, and others are practically begging to be radio singles. Meh.
Bon Jovi's music is rock music that is just too polished for me. The album is fine enough for some background music though.
A bunch of hits on here, but, well, it’s pretty average isn’t it? Sanitised rock with nothing interesting to say and only vaguely enjoyable to listen to.
Ok
This was my first tape cassette. My mom bought for me when I was 6 or 7. We were a MTV household, I grew up on music videos and you give love a bad name and living n a prayer were in heavy rotation. I had no understanding of what the lyrics in those songs meant but the music grabbed me. Rocking guitars and catchy chorus's. I used to jam to it on a little yellow, one speaker cassette player. Then one day my baby bro no older than 2 got a hold of the cassette and ripped the tape out and I haven't listened to the whole album since. It comes out fires blazing with 2 out of the first 3 tracks being those I already mentioned. Wanted Dead or Alive is another great track but the rest of the album falls short. It'll probably another 35 years before I listen to anything other than tracks 2,3 or 5 of this album.
Some BIG stadium classics and some very questionable lyrics. Stadium rock that isn't really for me.
You Give Love A Bad Name, Livin' On A Prayer, and Wanted Dead Or Alive — two good songs and one great one. If you only heard those three songs, you wouldn’t know how terrible this album is. They saved it from a one star rating. There's some variety to their failures: D-grade Van Halen impressions and bad Journey vibes top my own list. Apologies should've been issued to their influences for this mostly terrible record.
There are definitely some bangers here, but, yea.
This album aged like milk for me, it inexplicably got worse every listen. There are a few great songs scattered throughout the record but for the most part the entire album comes off as highly repetitive and simplistic. There isn't much depth to the tracks, which isn't inherently a problem but makes repeated listenings exhausting - I got almost everything I could out of the album just from the first listen. Standout tracks for me were You Give Love A Bad Name, obviously, and Raise Your Hands, but I actually don't particularly foresee myself returning to any other song from this LP, including the other two singles. This gets a lukewarm, but strong, 2/5. It was originally going to be a 3 but the sheer exhaustion I got from repeated listenings soured the taste too significantly.
I LOVED this record when I was little kid. It's very polished pop music with a hard rock (hair metal?) shroud. There are some bangers here and it brings back some good memories but it doesn't do much more than that for me anymore.
Too much of this growing up
Era defining: sounds like sweaty people with big hair rocking out in the 80s. It’s fun, not really my vibe, but I can understand it in the context of its time.
so hard to take bon jovi seriously these days, but it's actually pretty good.
Bland, generic 80s hair metal.
Damn, Bon Jovi really broke out their Big Book of Cliches for this one. I feel like it is only on this list due to its commercial success, and it only had commercial success because of three hits which are 'good' at best. The second half packed with cheesy, soapy love songs really put me off this album. 4/10
Vraiment insipide. Même les hits n'arrivent pas à remonter la moyenne d'appréciation de l'album.
Few bangers but overall meh
I remember when I was a kid thinking this is what a proper rockstar is. After listening to this, I was wrong.
Two stars... Livin on a prayer get in the bin.
osea seamos sinceros alguien esperaba que me encante bon jovi? 6/10
Cheesy as hell, feels very forced but there are saving graces like the production, especially the mixing (the high bass was a very pleasant surprise) but it can't hide the fact that the music included just isn't very good. I especially dislike the lyrics that are just Robert Plant knockoffs, substituting bland cliché for bland cliché. Overall, the record felt forced and uninspired, much longer than the 40 minute runtime would have you think. A disappointing record.
Pretty fun not much to say tho rly, contains some absolute bangers Fav (new) song: raise your hands
Not for me
JBJ - being married to his childhood Sweetheart for 30+ years is nice! JBJ - as a philanthropist is great JBJ as a singer is grating BJ as a band is mindnumbing I don’t even have the energy to mock them. But they have written some successful ear worms and I don’t hate them.
Big Hair P(l)op
some of their biggest hits on here, the Bon Jovi fans must have lost their minds when this came out, felt like an extended end to a night in a club cheese room though
I remember when this was out and popular. It was maybe the first time I realized I had nothing in common with most of America. Jon is such a poser of a singer and the album is just one cliche after another. As Sadie put it: "This band is mid." Having said that, "Living on a Prayer" is fucking great. So it's gets an extra star.
I find this band boring. I've got such a bad association with New Jersey and this band, this album, this year all congeals in trite lyrics and stereotypical riffs. I know it's an important 80s album to people who like this sort of thing. I do think the album title is funny and clever.
Listening to a Bon Jovi song on the radio every once and a while is fun but a whole album? no
Radio-friendly hard rock. It is what it is.
it’s exactly what i’d expect from bon jovi, which isn’t much. organ was fun
Eh. Not unlistenable, I suppose.
This wasn't bad, just very forgettable. I think this might be a 1 star if it wasn't for the couple of hard hitting in your face single tracks. I didn't hate it, just didn't find anything here particularly interesting.
The organs are fun. But this music is only enjoyable if you are listening to one song at a party. Only listen to bon Jovi in album format if you want to cringe for 45 mins and wish you were at a party, drunk.
Ehhh - it's Bon Jovi. There are some catchy arena rock songs on this album. They all sound so similar to me in their arrangement, and the lyrics are one cliche after another. .
I know the singles from this album. I know plenty of people who like Bon Jovi, and Slippery When Wet has a special place in their hearts. After all of these years, I still can't decide why you would listen to Bon Jovi. It's not like I got a rash from listening, but I didn't find any tracks that tempted me to listen again. ¿Is the band playing rock-star, or is this the type of music you put out because you're a rock star? Tough guy love songs. No thanks.
The album is not very good. Though I am not the biggest fan of hair metal and glam metal and could just be biased. However nothing other than Livin' On A Prayer and You Give Love A Bad Name, really stand out here. Jon Bon Jovi's voice just does not sound that great either Favorite Track: Livin' On A Prayer Least Favorite Track: Wild In The Streets
Was there ever a time people took Bon Jovi seriously? This sounds like a bunch of suburban dads trying to impersonate a heavy metal group. Also, does he really yell "rock band" before the guitar solo in Wild in the Streets? Pretty good song, then suddenly it's a joke.
Pretty typical dad rock music. 3 bangers and the rest blends in fairly well.
I tried to listen to it all. But they're so irritating, while being boring and repetitive. I remember finishing an assignment with the radio blaring non stop hair metal all night. I wasn't listening, just having it in the background. It was one long song, with exaggerated drum beats, shouted choruses, generic solos, and great dollops of pretentiousness. Listening to an album of this crap gives me that same feeling. What's really sad is that I believe Jon is a good person who writes good stories.
Vocals bad. Music pretty bad
Poodle perm rock. Cringey pop tunes with clichéd sub par Springsteen lyrics. Dumb ass album that hit the charts with 2 massive songs. Competent but inane. 2
Seems unlike most of the reviewers on here, I haven't heard most of these songs. Fairly boring and almost painfully redundant, like a more glammy AC/DC, but I guess I can see the reason for it's inclusion as a token hair metal album.
"it's is my life" -Jon Bovi there are people in this world who's lives were changed by jon bon and his band. they couldn't imagine a life without his leotard clad perm rock. to them this album must be a fucking banger because even the ones i don't know are the same quality as the big uns. in my opinion that is a low quality, but in memory to drunken student times where i knew no better it deserves an extra star.
I know this music was revolutionary for the time, but it has been done by everyone and comes off as cheesy.
Helt greit + Aldri vært noe særlig Bon Jovi fan.
plagsomt i lengden
Antaisin 1/5 mutta siitä tulisi liian tosikko olo.
For the past 35 years, I honestly thought that the lyrics we're "shot through the heart, and you're too late, you need lovin', and band-aid." I thought this was very clever and ironic because, obviously, a band-aid wouldn't do anything for a bleeding heart. But it turns out I was wrong, and this album sucks.
Certainly catchy, but also shallow and not creative
Christ this is cringe rock. Perfectly fun after a couple of cans at a bar and some interesting and the production is good at points. Never knew how straight cheese rock lots of their songs are. Didn't have fun with this one.
The three big singles are absolute bangers and the rest is just... fine I guess
Ridiculo. Fora "you give love" e "livin" não vale nada. Achamos até alguns exemplos de que eles reaproveitaram a mesma melodia em outras músicas. Pfff...
Boring copy of van halen
Ugh yo really haha
Not even the undeniably catchy singalong karaoke classic Livin’ On A Prayer can rescue this puddle of non-threatening, meaningless, bubblegum metal drivel. Everyone involved in this project has heard heavy metal rock and merely copied the basic building blocks without having any flair, originality or purpose.
Nothing memorable here. Hair metal, Says it all Cover art 2/5
Oh dear. The singles suggest more than the album delivers. Formulaic nonsense.
This album is considered a breakthrough for 80s hair metal. Having now actually heard it in full, I am even less convinced this is a good thing.
This has lots of familiar songs on it. It makes me feel nostalgic, but with a more critical ear, it is pretty bland rock.
While the album definitely has some classic songs it is a little to pop for my taste.
1/10/2022
The hits make me feel drunk as I'm immediately transported to cheesy nightclubs from my uni days. I wouldn't describe the feeling as nostalgia, as that puts too much of a positive spin on it. The non-hits are all a bit crap The exception to those two categories is Wanted Dead or Alive. A bonafide great song that has not been run into the ground through being over played.
Picture yourself in a night club on "rock night" and the DJ turns down the chorus to Livin on a Prayer so you can all go WHOA-OH!
Och nö. Cock rock. Ok, wenn mans nicht ernst nimmt.
This passage from Wikipedia tells you everything you need to know about this album: "...the band named the album Slippery When Wet after visiting The No.5 Orange strip club in Vancouver, British Columbia. According to Sambora, "This woman descended from the ceiling on a pole and proceeded to take all her clothes off. When she got in a shower and soaped herself up, we just about lost our tongues. We just sat there and said, 'We will be here every day.' That energized us through the whole project."" I really don't understand why this album is on this list. Sure, there are some hits with catchy, anthemic melodies, but it doesn't break any new ground, it's basic, simplistic, generic arena rock with mediocre lyrics and singing that makes me believe Jon Bon Jovi was constipated throughout the making of this album. Hated it then, still hate it now. 2 stars, only because I can't deny some songs are catchy.
These 2 stars are for Livin' On A Prayer
Even though there is a LOT of hard rock and heavy metal I love, I really don't love much pop metal or glam metal like this. I vastly prefer British rock to American rock, I must say, even though I'm American born and raised. The cheesiness is slightly sickening to me at parts. I do love the solo guitar work and tone, I hear some Van Halen influence there I think. The vocalist is talented but the voice does get on my nerves a bit. Didn't hate the album, didn't love it. When I tell people I like rock and metal this isn't what I mean. I don't knock other people for liking it though.
Before listening to it again after a long time I thought Slippery When Wet would be more fun and enjoyable. I guess it did not age well.
I am almost certain that I should give this a 1 but there's probably worse things to listen to
1. Hire the guy who writes for Kiss, Cher and Bonnie Tyler and get him to write songs for you. 2. Gather 30 high school kids in a pizza place and keep reworking the songs and running order to appeal to them. 3. Profit. Get in the bin.
This is basically standard 80s pop dressed up with big loud guitars, meaning it sounds a little like metal but with none of the power. "Let it Rock" is one of the most tepid momentum-building openers I've heard, and "Wanted Dead or Alive" is a similarly tedious attempt at a power ballad. "Livin' on a Prayer" is incredibly catchy though, one of the few times the anthemic vocals work. With that in mind, the album is actually at its best when it leans into the pop sound fully, like on "Without Love." The back half of the album seems like an attempt to emulate Springsteen, but with more cloying vocals; "Never Say Goodbye" is like a lethargic "Glory Days" and the closer really sounds like watered-down the Boss. It's hard to deny this can be catchy, but it's so lacking in substance that no amount of guitar solos can make up for it.
Não entendi porque este álbum está aqui.
#243/1001 🇺🇸 There is really only one thing that this reckrd is good for and thats playing air guitar to Livin' On A Prayer at wedding discos. I guess the singles are ok but they don't make up for how godawful tracks like Social Disease and Raise Your Hands are. Best Tracks: Livin' On A Prayer,
Saying “you can’t start a fire without a spark” 2 years after Bruce is wack and so is this album. I’m burnt out on cliche 80s hair douchebaggery. I loved You Give Love A Bad Name as a kid tho
Nope!
Just boo. It's so bland and boring and dumb and sounds exactly like everything and says nothing and just keeps going over and over and over the same sounds. Booo
this shit fucking sucks
the biggest dad rock hits don't usually ever have much to offer for me, and this is no exception. the 80s is my least favorite decade in music since the 50s, and this is WAY too 80s. so cheesy and plastic, with mediocre vocal performances and poor instrumentation, it really feels like they were just fishing for fame and nothing more.
There were a lot of bad hair bands in the 80s. Bon Jovi was head and shoulders above the rest.
Boring, overly grandiose, sappy arena rock/glam metal. By far one of my least favorite genres. The only thing that triumphs this albums lack of self awareness is its lack of anything interesting.
Ah Bon Jovi. I'm too young to have been there, but the bands music (or at least 3 songs) is part of almost every wedding and school disco across the land. The first track *** [Let it Rock] starts with an epic keys/organ/synth piece that leads into anthemic arena rock. This is heavier than I expected and I never really appreciated the lead guitar in the past. [You give love a bad name] is one of those social consciousness singles. The chuggy guitar in the verse bursts into a powerful chorus and a technical solo. [Livin on a prayer] is a song I don't need to hear again. It has the Bon Jovi hallmarks. Their choruses are catchy, easy to sing. Set up for live audience participation or drunk people at a social event. [Social disease] has the seemingly obligatory sex noise song (at least 1/4 albums so far have had one!) Auto skip. [Wanted dead or alive] had strong "western" vibes and I understand it was on Red Dead Redemption so that makes total sense. After this - the album fades completely into soppy no energy love songs, pretty formulaic rock (although it might be fatigue from the album) and few memorable sections. By the end of the album I needed it to be over. Overall 1.5 probably - will likely round down to a 1. It's mostly songs I've heard too much or songs that do nothing for me. Fair play to the lead guitar however - definitely the biggest surprise from this album.
A pale imitation of Spinal Tap.
Ooh, look at me and my pretty hair. Watch me fling it without a care. I can play a guitar and sing too, but the songs are vapid and belong in the loo.
Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope ❌❌❌ I told myself I would give every album on this list a fair shake and listen to it all the way through, no matter what. I guess I lied to myself. Sorry self, but I refuse to listen to this one. If I had the power to rewrite history I would take an eraser to this albums existence.
Nope... burn it with fire (hairspray is flammable)
Nice things first: "Wanted Dead or Alive" is an arresting, musically interesting song. And I guess they've nailed the pop-radio formula. Richie Sambora definitely adds great metal licks. But "Wanted Dead or Alive" is ruined by insipid lyrics. Taken as a whole, it's a pop album about a hair-metal lifestyle. It's got a lot to offer if you're looking for sentimentality and hair-metal costumes. Good for nostalgic enjoyment and also (40 years later) ironic enjoyment. I never listened to the whole album before, but the songs I wasn't familiar with were real pop stinkers: "Social Disease," "Without Love," "I'd Die for You." "Never Say Goodbye" was probably a prom theme, but I've forgotten. Bottom line: I hate it. Another one of the "1-star but for historical purposes, for understanding how and why music that's hugely popular can also suck, it probably belongs on a list of 1000 albums" that I suppose people should be aware of.
this album is nothing
Nope. Sure there are some 'bangers' on there that everyone sings when they're drunk but it's just meh. It's rock sure but not special enough. 1/5.
I don't like this guy's voice, at all. Side one is pure dreck.
One of the worst albums on this list so far, I hate everything about it. However I will participate in a Livin on a Prayer singalong every time
Shit from a butt
Bovine diarrhoea is also slippery and wet. Whoa, whoa, whoa, w'w'whoa, whoa, whoa...
i hate bon jovi
Wow, I’m almost impressed by how terrible this is. There’s good fast food, and then there’s bad fast food. The latter doesn’t just leave you with a guilty conscience about the garbage you’ve just shoved into your digestive system - it doesn’t even deliver the sweet, saccharine rush that makes you turn to junk food for comfort in the first place. If Bon Jovi were food, they’d fall squarely into that latter category. The best thing I can say about Slippery When Wet is that Bon Jovi managed a not insignificant feat: they created a cliché version of a genre that is already a cliché - and somehow made it sound sterile in the process. This is toothless, risk-free music dressed up as something edgier than it really is. Really doubt that the editors of this list even spun Slippery When Wet from front to back; I’d even go so far as to claim that doing so is impossible without risking to loose one’s faith in artistic integrity.
Nope
Pre-Listening Notes: IhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJoviIhateBonJovi Mid-Listening Notes: Bon Jovi is so disgusting in the least camp way possible. There are albums that could get away with having pornographic noises as a pseudo-interlude, but here it just comes across as incredibly sincere in the most disgusting way. Post-Listening Notes: I need to take a shower 1/5
DESENGANADO PELA MEDICINA, RETORNEI (esqueci do site pqp) ouvi esse aqui e quis chorar de tristeza como pode glam rock mainstream de estádio ter existido né, trem ruim do caralho
New guy just dropped, listening to Bon Jovi to own the hipsters Will I listen to again: 0%
What an abysmal record. You can tell that the band is trying their hardest to be Van Halen, but they have a modicum of the talent. Mr. Jovi is no Diamond Dave, and while Roth's sometimes awful lyrics can be overlooked due to his persona and swagger, Jon Bon Jovi has none of that. Just a lame, limp, lifeless album that for some reason has lyrics about having sex in the back of cars way too often.
Glam pop version of a Michael Bolton record. This in the mid-80s was what passed for metal. Soulless music stripped of all life brought to you by a band that ripped off every other shitty pop metal band operating at the time. Loverboy, Bryan Adams, Def Leopard, Foreigner, Toto, Styx the list is endless and unfortunately demonstrates that in America, people will listen to records with no original ideas. The Michael Bolton reference at the beginning of this review is not a throwaway comment. This is an album filled with the stupidest lyrics ever committed to be sung and is just an endless whine. You Give Live A Bad Name, I’d Die For You, Never Say Goodbye, Wanted Dead or Alive - an endless stream of cliches and just outright offensively stupid lyrics make this record a slog. Even Livin on a Prayer is a Foreigner ripoff. Hair metal making the charts shows just how fucked up the ecosystem that controls radio actually is. Intellectually bankrupt and shameless corporate rock this is as bad as every Steely Dan record and may be the only reason why this album should never be allowed to be played publicly. Listening to this album all the way through made me stupider. There is no redeeming value to this music and Bon Jovi should be ashamed for releasing this into society. We are all worse off for having heard it. This confirms what I largely suspected. The author of this list - 1001 Albums You Should Listen Too Before You Die- is a fucking idiot. Those who conspired with him should be imprisoned for life and forced to only listen to Slippery When Wet. Dumb asses. 0/5
Rock and roll is supposed to have rough edges and jagged corners - in part, that's where the thrill of listening to the Cramps or the Minutemen or The Jesus And Mary Chain comes from. Bon Jovi's third studio album is the antithesis of that - it's a collection of tracks that have been compressed, slathered with reverb, and EQ'd to death, in order to make the disc as "radio ready" as possible. There's no trace of Elvis, Beatles or the Rolling Stones on this record, instead it's the spiritual heir of Boston, Foreigner, Journey and the glut of hyperprocessed junk food rock from the 70s.
I fucking have bon jovi
Ever have a childhood friend you didn't really like but you just hung out with anyway? I did and his name was Austin. One time we took what little money we had as a kid to best buy to buy some CDs. I bought Metallica's ...And Justice for All, and what did this motherfucker buy? This. I remember making fun of him for it relentlessly, calling him all kinds of rude things that boys call eachother. We were in boy scouts together at the time (this must have been 6th grade or so) and not too long after this CD buying incident we went to a summer camp retreat. This guy loaded this CD into his mom's Ford Windstar with no AC in the 100+ degree summer heat. The soundtrack to the 5 hour drive to and from this fucking camp was this CD over, and over, and over again. Sweating my ass off, trying not to throw up from being carsick as hell on my way to some fucking camp I don't even want to go to with this bullshit playing the entire time. This is the soundtrack to hell, and not in a cool slayer way.
Holy shit is this ever bad.
Can I give this zero stars?
Meh, not much of a Bon Jovi fan. I loved classic rock as a teenager, but even then I was never was a big fan
Shit
Bon Jovi er ikke bra. Det må være lov å lage musikk kun for å få fitte, men jeg må få slippe å høre på den. Bon Jovi brøt reglene, for tre av låtene her er helt umulig å unngå å høre. Produksjonen på skiva er også jævlig dritt, men nå spikker jeg flis. Bassen i Livin' on a Prayer er helseskadelig; ooa ooa gjennom talkbox en krigsforbrytelse. Faktisk er hele bandet en krigserklæring på god smak. Etter 30 minutter begynte jeg å føle meg uvel. Under Never Say Goodbye kunne jeg gjenkjenne følelser av kvalme. Når det endelig er over og jeg burde føle lettelse, kan jeg bare kjenne utmattelse. Aldri igjen.
Let it stop You give music a bad name Living on a paycheck Social collapse Wanted Dead or Dead Put down your hands Without talent I want to die Say goodbye Mild in the streets
Pure ear cancer
"Slippery When Wet was an instant commercial success, spending eight weeks at No. 1 on the U.S. Billboard 200 chart and was named by Billboard as the top-selling album of 1987." This is the irrefutable demonstration that people haven't become stupid because of the internet, or social networks, or smartphones. They have always been. These technologies just made the fact blatant. However, already 40 years ago, the hints were clear enough to those who wanted to see them.
I just can't do it. A whole Bon Jovi album in one sitting is like torture.
I hate hair metal so much omg. I did TRY to listen to this but I’m losing hope that this list is gonna be anything other than dad rock
Makes my skin crawl Music for people who thought The Wolf of Wall Street was aspirational.
can't stand this... Dec. 23rd, 2025
Not for me
Nope
Hair Metal at its finest. And by finest I mean at its candy pop lucrative boy band best. Shite with loudness and pomp used to sugarcoat it.
Einfach nein.
If I had a karaoke machine with Bon Jovi on it, I would smash it into tiny pieces rather than sing along to this vapid shite.
Bah...New Jersey produces some very popular bands but not great ones. Bon Jovi is an annoyance for me. Wimpy hair rock that every drunk chick freaks out over. I understand that this belongs on the list though...it's was a monstrous(ity) hit album that features 3 tracks that have been beaten to death by every rock station, dive bar, and sporting event. The supporting tracks have gone unlistened by the world and for good reason...they suck. "Wild in the Streets" sounded like it may be a nod to the Boss. 1.2 stars for this sexual inuendo.
Dreadful. The three massively famous songs - “You Give Love a Bad Name”, “Wanted Dead or Alive” and “Livin on a Prayer” are passable in isolation, but in context of the album are avatars of the hollowness of the whole Bon Jovi project. A slick facsimile of hair metal with none of the sleaze or grit, empty platitudes and not a single original idea.
fucking shite. worst guitar, vocal, lyrical, chorus style ever. The members of this band just seem like horrible, arrogant people. At least Van Halen had some type of substance, and that was like half a decade before this. Favourite songs: none. Overall around 2/10
God awful
Not my cup of tea
As bland and predictable as rock music can get. It's music that is specifically engineered to be played in a stadium, it has to be so simple that crowds of extremely basic people can sing along
Twats
If you like Bon Jovi, this might be an all timer. His three biggest songs in one album. Pretty insane. I do not like Bon Jovi. So I did not like this at all.
A tribute to drunk boomer moms everywhere.
I'm emphatically not a Bon Jovi fan. In fact the whole hair pop metal scene of the 80s is just cringe as hell. I decided to give this a fresh listen since I've basically avoided Bon Jovi since around 2000 as much as possible, but all I can say is I was right. This shit is so painful to listen to. Sure, the hooks are solid and all, but the lyrics are god awful, the 80s drums are tacky, the keys a little too polished and make the sum of the parts sounds gooberish. I'm happy it's been 25 years since I've listened to Bon Jovi and I was right to do so. I won't be coming back to this one ever.
Whenever I have albums like this I can't help but be glad Nirvana killed this stuff, and not because I like Nirvana anyway but because we really didn't need 10,000 more albums of this shit. I get this stuff is fun or cheesy goodness but to me its the exact kind of cheese that made so much rock (ESPECIALLY 80s ROCK) sound the fucking same and it was always boring despite how much it tries to hype you up Just, so glad its dead because we don't need this
This is the absolute worst kind of music made by the worst kind of people. This is literal dribble made exclusively to pack arenas and sell a brand. They just took a heaping scoop of rock du jour and put into a vat of shit that is this album. No creativity, no soul, no innovation. Fuck you Bon Jovi. I also had to go to an awful Bon Jovi concert while he was 30 years past his prime with my ex-girlfriend and her family and I'm totally not bitter about it at all.
Why can’t I leave 0 stars. This was a glam dream from hell
NEJ! Hur mycket jag än älskar att skriva och läsa sågningar, för det är alltid dom bästa recensionerna. Men Nej det här går inte... Jag mår bokstavligen illa Jag lyssnar fan hellre på Venom Etta så svag att det borde va en nolla men det går tydligen inte Lyssna hellre på Bruce Springsteen & The E-Street Band - Born in the USA, Europe - The final countdown
meh
I didn't realize how much I hate Bon Jovi until listening to this straight through.
https://media.tenor.com/f-hcv7s5qfAAAAAM/not-listening.gif
Really can't stand this guy and his music. I wish all of Buffalo would have stayed a Bon Jovi free zone. Even if him moving the Buffalo Bills was just a rumor started by Donald Trump he still sucks.
It is a bit like someone said "people like Ratt, people like Styx" and Bon Jovi was like "say no more fam" and went and recorded this album and then took it to a record executive to give the band notes and then the band re-recorded to appease the corporate record execs and then the album was on the Billboard Hot 100 and went on to sell 15 million copies leaving us stuck with poppy crap corpo rock masquerading as rebellious anti-establishment music with tracks that cops and administrators at construction companies play on their way home from work to feel badass.
let it rock- 2 you give love a bad name- 2. stop living on a prayer- squidward on a chair. 2 social diseases- 2 wanted dead or alive- 1. can this song end already raise your hands- 2 without love- 2 id die for you- good lord. 1 never say goodbye- 2 wild in the streets- 1
I like “livin on a prayer.” It does a disservice to too many drunken college nights to pretend otherwise. But I won’t say any of these songs are good. I wonder if I could learn the guitar parts to this entire album in a day. Oh, maybe not: I see a couple scattered measures in some of the guitar solos that would be tricky for me. I couldn’t play the “raise your hands” riff, especially that harmonic run. Maybe I could get to 90% in a day. I mean this sincerely: in “wanted dead or alive,” is he a cowboy or a rock star? If he’s a rock star, nobody wants him dead. If he’s a cowboy, he doesn’t ride a steel horse. A steel horse is, I assume, a tour bus. I would guess he’d say he’s both a metaphorical cowboy *and* a real rock star, but then the writing is full of mixed metaphors and it’s just bad. A loaded six-string isn’t a thing. What makes you say you might not make it back? Sir, we are talking about a Wednesday night at an arena in Minneapolis, not the OK Corral. What about being on the road makes you a cowboy? When the best explanation for a song’s lyrics is “we didn’t think about it for longer than about five seconds,” that’s not great. I know “raise your hands” from a movie. What movie, Google? Oh, it’s Spaceballs. I kinda thought that was a fake bad song they made up for the movie. Guess not! It is a real bad song Bon Jovi made up and then voluntarily chose to include on an actual album people paid money for. Between a 1 and a 2. On the one hand, there’s no artistic merit to any of this and my “crass sellout” alarms are blaring. On the other, how many times have I screamed “whoa-oh” in my life because of this album? That’s worth something. Okay, so I wrote that last paragraph with about four songs to go on the album. And those songs sucked. I’m going to give this a 1, add “livin on a prayer” to my ongoing playlist for this project, and note that my nostalgia for that song is very strong and the 1 rating is not a reflection of good times had at parties and weddings. It is a reflection that Bon Jovi fucking sucks.
Just can't give the love and appreciation that most people have for Bon Jovi and his classic rock vibes.
one time in grade 7 me, brian danielson and cole jefferies all wore canadian tuxedos to english class and performed a lip sync'd version of Livin' on a Prayer as like a boy band. I do not remember what assignment inspired us to do that but I do remember two things distinctly. number 1 is that it was completely my idea. the song, the dress code, the choreo. I also stayed up until like 2am on a school night to fully memorize the lyrics to the song to improve my lip syncing. The second thing I remember is that we were the only students who came to class in costumes, the only students who did a performance of any kind AND we got a near failing grade on the assignment because apparently I completely misunderstood what we were supposed to do and convinced bryan and cole (a students) that I understood the assignment better than them (B- student btw) anyways, unrelated to the story bon jovi sucks
A dangerously combustible mix of hair spray, pure cocaine, industrial cynicism, and half remembered Springsteen songs. I've known this album as anything other than a corny joke to bellow along with when it the hits come on the radio - three singalong karaoke mega jams that are undeniably fun despite being way overplayed and incredibly crap. Listening through in full I realize that even the hits are way too long and the joke wears off after the first chorus, but the song keeps going, and goooooooooing. The rest is 80s pop metal filler with an emphasis on the pop - the metal is exclusively the palm muted riffs and squealing pinch harmonics on the guitar. It sucks at such a deeply fundamental it's almost good. Almost...
There is nothing about this style that I relate or react positively to. Whatever extremely valid reasons people may have for enjoying this type of music - it's "fun", "badass", hooky, nostalgic, etc. - are not reasons that I personally find agreeable or applicable. There is nothing on a musical, lyrical, or production level that moves, intrigues, or excites me in any way whatsoever. I like so many artists, albums, and songs for so many different reasons - for instance, I think some of them are fun, badass, hooky, nostalgic, etc. But when I consider every element that has ever brought me enjoyment in any given song, album, or genre, I don't hear any of them present in music like this. 0.5/5
* zero stars
It's so slippery, no chance to stay sober with it
This was a great rock album for teenage girls.
Awful awful 80's rock.
ei kummoitsa musiikkia tämä...
Sounds like the music that the people that used to beat me up in high school listen to
Wondered if this would change my opinion on Bon Jovi, it did not.
Over-produced, over-confident nonsense.
No.
This alum has everything the 80's has to offer, but only the bad stuff. Bon Jovi's vocals are a mix between Bruce Springsteen, Axle Rose, and Steve Perry and is not married well at all. The lyrics are so basic and predictable. The rhyming patterns are maybe a hair above what a kindergartener would come up with. I knew roughly half this album from it being played at ball games, grocery stores, crap bars in suburbia, and gas stations. I don't get how this album/music/artist is revered at all, let alone 40 years after this crap came out. Bon Jovi is for D students who peaked in 10th grade and work at an instant oil change place down the road from their ex-wife's house, hoping she comes in for an oil change so he can win her back. 1.5/10 #29/1001
Bon Jovi sucks
They have a knack for churning out catchy riffs and hook lines. And the man himself as a private citizen seems to be a decent human being. But. By God, the catchy tunes and riffs are so stupid any annoying. Well, except for the bass line and drums at the start of Keep the Faith, before the rest of the band joins in. But that's a different album, anyway. But there's Livin' on a Prayer here, which also starts with an okay bass line before the keyboards come in and all the rest, making it an 80s hair rock anthem. Well, it's socially conscious, much like Springsteen's stuff. But by God I really can't stand the music. If you're wondering: A friend of mine at school was hugely into them, that's why I srill know more about their discography than I wish to know. It's all a bit too much. And yet. Drunk at my uncle's 3rd or 4th wedding reception, I can't guarantee that I won't be air-guitaring and air-fist-pumping to Livin' on a Prayer. So Bon Jovi has that questionable honour over KISS in my hook. Still. What a chore to get through this.
Oh god, not another 80s hair/metal/leotard noise-makers.
👎
Oh good grief, that album title. Oh good grief, the banal lyrics. Oh good grief, the tired cliches. Oh good grief, a talkbox. Oh good grief, the hastily replaced cover art.
I just can't do glam. The cringey lyrics certainly don't help. You've gotta have a lot of skill to pull off sex noises in a song and in my eyes they just don't.
It's sad that this is the only Bon Jovi album on the list. It just feels wrong not to have him on my worst artists list
Bioomerinhalt
The Devil himself is responsible for any hair metal ending up on this list.
here I am, thinking about Bowie and the gallery all over again. in a deliberate attempt to sell as many units as possible, Bon Jovi's third album is devoid of anything that could be called unique or interesting, either topically or instrumentally. I've discussed my frustration at the ubiquity and assumed supremacy of the classic rock canon, and glam metal albums like this represent the nadir of that entire group of recordings. the title must refer to the synths, which are barely audible and only serve to coat the guitars in a layer of gross slime. I'll give Jon Bon Jovi slight props for being a pretty capable singer, but the timbre of his singing voice just makes my skin crawl. the blurb written about Slippery When Wet in the 1001 Albums book talks a lot about how universal the themes of these songs are, and that's all well and good; but, again, Bon Jovi's approach to these themes reveals nothing about who they are as people. one of the reasons Bruce Springsteen, whose influence is all over this music, is so revered is the distinct quality of his lyricism; even when he's telling fictional stories akin to the ones on "Living on a Prayer" or "You Give Love a Bad Name", he places them in a very believable, vivid universe with his writing, both of music and words. a recurring theme with these reviews has been that I really want to hear someone's unique perspective from either of those angles, and I don't feel like I came away from this understanding anything about the members of Bon Jovi as artists or human beings. the band's take on a pop rock sound akin to that of Springsteen or Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers falls more in line with heavy metal, but it's so sanitized that it barely registers as metal. there's guitar solos and power chord riffs, but it never feels blood-pumping, exciting, haunting, or any of the other qualities that great metal can have. so I guess this record simply doesn't work for me at any level. the worst thing an album can do for me is nothing. light 2/10.
Never heard a bon Jovi album before but this was exactly as I was expecting..... Crap! I've always disliked loving on a prayer and you give love a bad name. Reminds me of 2am in my hometown "nightclub" Also don't like the faux bad boy rocker thing
0.5
Oh, just fuck right off. Bollocks to Bon fucking Jovi.
Oh Jesus. So terrible
insane intro.. sitten iskee peruskomppi 50bpm voi saatan. wooooooah wooooooooooooooouh waaaaaaaaoaoooooooaaaaaaaaaa. olden music golden music... ei mene paremmaksi kuin tämä MUSIIKKI ei nykyajan äÅÄRÄT VITTU twerkkaukset paskat puhelin puhelin puhelin pliil poolp vittu VITTU!!!!!! 0% nainen 100% transu 0% awesomeness. EVERYBODY WITH ME: woooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa wooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I guess they hate the perceived inauthenticity of it all? Maybe they hate that it's a good bit of fun? Or maybe simply because it's such a "white dude thing" and that's an easy target for hipsters. Either way, fucking lol. I hate it because it sounds like fucking ass deadn or alvi
God i hate bon jovi
This is as generic as it gets. Mass produced with nothing to say.
Мне как-будто в уши накончали, еб твою мать 3/10
I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT
ghostbusters core aesthetic, надоело после 2 песни
Pop hair rock
Man this is bad and just have no redeeming qualities. Lowest common denominator music. At least Jon Bon Jovi seems like a good dude. But man, this list could really help itself ditching this kind of stuff.
Prva pjesma i nije bila toliko loša, ali kad sam čuo drugu oko mi je krenulo titrati. Možda on ima nekih dobrih b strana pjesama, ali od ovih hitova lagano proljevčić kuha u meni O bože, Livin on a prayer me tjera na to da ja sebe propucam kroz srce i da okrivim nju Lagano mi ovo zvuči kao glazba za bajkere koji potajno vole pegging A što ovaj gated kanta sner zvuk ne volim... Nisam ga skuzio na prvu jer sam se zgražao nad drugim stvarima, ali sad kad sam ga čuo, jedino to čujem. Mislim, super kome je ovo dobro, ali ja ću stati ovdje jer po ovome jedino mogu kenjat, a tog sam već i previše napravio
Nah
fine, probably?
such a boring album
A strong contender for the cheesiest record of all time. And it's not gotten any better or more musically meaningful over time. However, in some ways, it's aged perfectly – that is, it still sounds just like it did when it came out, as an absolute satire of every bad '80s trend in instrumentation, studio production, power balladry and popular culture. But there's no doubting this hair band's sincerity. JBJ clearly thought he should have been take as seriously as the more substantive rock stars (not mentioning the obvious comp out of respect). Richie thought he was Jimmy Page. The record also manages to revive awful '70s arena rock tropes, including squalling guitar solos, singalong choruses, hand clapping, whistles and crowd noise, etc. ("Raise Your Hands" is the poster child for these undead excesses). And let's not even talk about the fashion sense and hair styles – what an embarrassment this is (or should be) for all involved (thankfully, one was not in the least). "Love is a social disease" is the cleverest lyric (not that it's a high bar) but the massively cheesy (and unnecessary) horns (which sound CGI-generated) of this particular track more than undercut the wit, or what passes for it. Lines such "Remember when we lost the keys / you lost more than that in my back seat baby" speaks to an earlier, perhaps more innocent time in America (or at least in the Garden State) but also preclude one from giving this band any benefit of the doubt (the guitar solos in "Never Say Goodbye" close the case). It's not even worth a moment of consideration that one might be missing something. And one hesitates to call this heavy metal, a mostly loathsome genre in one's view, because that would be an insult to metalheads. Critics who were unkind to BJ must ask themselves what else they could have done to stop this juggnernaut of bad taste, why they weren't even crueller. What a waste of time (other than being good for a chuckle) and certainly a waste of a slot in the RRHOF and in this esteemed list. 1.5 > 1 ... rounding down because one fears too many people still like this lot.
On principal I have to drag this down
Slippery when wet. Like your Mum. No album on this list so far has made me cringe this much. It's just Springsteen blue collar nonsense but with Kiss doing the music. I skipped through most tracks as I could feel I was growing a mullet.
No one should ever have to listen to this derivative, bland, tripe. 0/5 stars.
Boring butt rock
многообещающее синтезаторное начало. классический глэм рок. ну такое, мне не оч. скип на начале второго трека
Please no. The songs that have some semblance of decency have been so overplayed that I can't help but run for the hills when I hear the first note. The rest are just bad. And not all hair metal is bad. Give me Def Leppard over Bon Jovi any day of the week.
From Adam: Immediately played Boston - More Than a Feeling after the bon jovial album was over and I’m like, “One small step for man…. One giant leap for mankind…” From Drew: I think my biggest criticism of this album is that it’s not timeless. It’s too much of its time. Maybe thats what makes it good though. A historical marker of sorts From Adam: Sure. Could be a positive. And a good reason to listen to it at least once. I think for me it’s the monotony of the super basic major chord progressions. It’s crazy predictable, plus his voice is so silly… I think I used to have patience for this voice, but it’s just so uninteresting. It’s like American Idol voice without the talent of the best ones… From Drew: Fuck this album I can’t do it. I made it to living on a prayer. The next song had horns!
unbearable. I finally understand buttrock though. even buttrock is a perfect expression of some part of human experience. buttrock is for when you feel aggressively normal. it's unbearable to listen to in one sitting even if you are aggressively normal, is the problem
really not interested in butt rock and im glad its over
Nope.
Horrible stuff
I grew up with many of these songs, so it's somewhat surprising how little I can stand them at this point. Any soft spot I may have is more tumorous than endearing.
Wait a minute. I think this is supposed to be on the list of 1001 albums that you should listen to, to make you die.
I hate this with every fibre of my being. This album in particular is especially offensive, but really most of this kind of thing from that era is intolerable. It's not Bon Jovi's fault, there are a ton of classic songs on here and the ones I know, I know quite well. It's just that this stuff has been played endlessly on mediocre classic rock station and dive bars. It's just cringe at this point. If I never heard Dead or Alive again in my lifetime, it won't be soon enough.
★½
Utter crap
Fucking kill me already
Milquetoast. Putting any more effort into describing it would do a disservice to my brain.
Ah yes, the album that made me give up on "metal" for over 20 years. After heavy rock slowly morphed into hair metal through the '80s, we get this. It's the culmination of "metal" becoming bullshit pop music. It's basically the antithesis of everything I believe in musically. This is throwaway industry garbage that can only be enjoyed through a very thick lens of nostalgia.
Just about my least favorite musical style. Where did hair metal go? I think it just evolved into new country. Good god.
I know this is not meant to be particularly deep, but it could stand to be clever and more sincere. By the end of this album, I'm left feeling exhausted and a little gross while thinking of other albums that better represent this genre.
Ive never liked glam. I did like "You Give Love a Bad Name" and "Living on a Prayer" . Still not good
Siempre los he odiado
On behalf of the sane people from the Garden State, you suck Jon.
Make it stop, why would you subject me to this?
Very dated. Wanted Dead or Alive can't even save this record. Unlistenable.
bleib mir weg
Hated it then, hate it now. Spinal Tap without the jokes.
The hair. The hits. The bad taste of the 80s. Ugh
Pretty unlistenable
This is garbage.
05/1001 I had heard good things about Bon Jovi, but I think this album is not one of them. It was boring and I honestly didn't feel like there was anything enjoyable or interesting about any song. I don't know if all work is like this but I hope not.
I refuse to listen to this fucking album, having been subjected to it mercilessly when it came out in the 80s because it was a favorite of my mom's, and somehow still pummeled regularly by songs from this album, even 40 fucking years later. I have always fucking hated everything about Bon Jovi. Nothing about him appeals to me on any level. HARD PASS.
That's 43 minutes of my life I won't get back. I found no benefit to hear this album as a whole. Mid 80's pop metal/hard rock at it's cringiest - a little synth, some serviceable guitar by Richie Sambora, but utterly forgettable. This wasn't my thing when it first came out and my views haven't changed. Most of the songs have such vacuous lyrics. This has aged like milk for me. I will concede Livin' On A Prayer and Never Say Goodbye are decent songs, but even that won't save it from being a 1 star album for me.
I'm not going over this one again.
Я не осознавал, как много мне приходилось слушать этот альбом, когда я был молодым. Если я собираюсь слушать Heavy Metal, он должен быть тяжелее.
Quintessential mid-80's pop hair-metal band. Possibly a definitive Bon Jovi album if there is such a thing. Not my style then and I haven't softened my opinion since. It was tough to force myself to listen to this one because it is so cringy
I hate Bon Jovi
Fuck bon jovi
Make it stop.
Hell nah
Combines my two least favorite genres, metal and pop. Tried to like it but no luck. 1/5
Didn't like the songs I already knew, didn't like the songs that I'd never heard before. Absolute shite.
shot through the heart and youre to blame you give new jersey a bad name 1.5/5
With some artists it's important to remember the 5 Ds : Dodge, duck, dive, dip and ..... dodge. Whatever it takes to avoid a crap album. Just be careful that you don't slip though (cue drum roll) boom
Tried give the album an unbiased listen despite my initial misgivings and low expectations based on memories from when it came out and the seemingly endless playing of the hits Wish I hadn't bothered, turns out I was right all along. It's shit.
Painful. It hit every nerve in me that cried, "This is terrible." Somehow I listened to the whole thing, but it wasn't for me at all I am quite aware that there will be people for whom this is their #1 of all time. Let's agree to disagree.
det här är ett skämt va?
I thought i'd give this a 2 rather than a 1, as it does have A LOT of hits (although they're all pretty bad). But the deep cuts on here are some of the worst songs i've ever heard.
I'd rather just die.
80s metal is one of my least favorite things.
Ick
living on a prayer, the perfect song if you want a more grating and less poetic Springsteen song to play at a Christian fundamentalist wedding