542
Albums Rated
3.02
Average Rating
50%
Complete
547 albums remaining
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When do you listen?
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1950s
Favorite Decade
Grunge
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Top Origin
Wordsmith
Rater Style ?
37
5-Star Albums
43
1-Star Albums
Taste Analysis
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Ratings by genre
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Ratings by country
Rating Style
You Love More Than Most
Albums you rated higher than global average
| Album | You | Global | Diff |
|---|---|---|---|
| Yank Crime | 5 | 2.7 | +2.3 |
| Kollaps | 4 | 1.9 | +2.1 |
| Real Life | 5 | 3.06 | +1.94 |
| Junkyard | 4 | 2.16 | +1.84 |
| Closer | 5 | 3.22 | +1.78 |
| The Stooges | 5 | 3.26 | +1.74 |
| Fever To Tell | 5 | 3.29 | +1.71 |
| The Downward Spiral | 5 | 3.35 | +1.65 |
| Home Is Where The Music Is | 5 | 3.36 | +1.64 |
| Blue Lines | 5 | 3.38 | +1.62 |
You Love Less Than Most
Albums you rated lower than global average
| Album | You | Global | Diff |
|---|---|---|---|
| Highway 61 Revisited | 1 | 3.77 | -2.77 |
| Blood On The Tracks | 1 | 3.68 | -2.68 |
| Bringing It All Back Home | 1 | 3.65 | -2.65 |
| Maggot Brain | 1 | 3.6 | -2.6 |
| Blonde On Blonde | 1 | 3.5 | -2.5 |
| My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy | 1 | 3.42 | -2.42 |
| Live And Dangerous | 1 | 3.32 | -2.32 |
| The College Dropout | 1 | 3.31 | -2.31 |
| Slippery When Wet | 1 | 3.29 | -2.29 |
| Live At The Star Club, Hamburg | 1 | 3.28 | -2.28 |
Artist Analysis
Favorite Artists
Artists with 2+ albums
| Artist | Albums | Average |
|---|---|---|
| Radiohead | 4 | 4.5 |
| Led Zeppelin | 4 | 4.5 |
| Pink Floyd | 3 | 4.67 |
| Nirvana | 2 | 5 |
| Aretha Franklin | 2 | 5 |
| The Clash | 2 | 5 |
| Miles Davis | 3 | 4.33 |
Least Favorite Artists
Artists with 2+ albums
| Artist | Albums | Average |
|---|---|---|
| Bob Dylan | 6 | 1.17 |
| Kanye West | 2 | 1 |
| Taylor Swift | 2 | 1.5 |
| The Byrds | 2 | 1.5 |
| Bee Gees | 2 | 1.5 |
Controversial Artists
Artists you rate inconsistently
| Artist | Ratings |
|---|---|
| Amy Winehouse | 2, 5 |
5-Star Albums (37)
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Popular Reviews
The Byrds
1/5
Can’t wait until the last of the boomers are gone and we can stop pretending every wet fart from the 60s was groundbreaking.
20 likes
Brian Wilson
1/5
This would be considered too clownish to be a soundtrack to a toddler’s cartoon. If this is a masterpiece, then a toilet spewing the contents of a backed up septic is evidence of divine design of the universe. Nothing on this album is fun, listenable, or anything short of droning and irritating. Good Vibrations is on this for some reason, possibly to remind you what a weak song it is, despite its popularity. I suppose if you like the sound “ooooooh” a lot and really wish there was a more modern take on the barbershop quartet, this is probably for you. Otherwise, I highly recommend keeping functioning ears far away from this album which goes on so long, I’m fairly certain it exists to make sure it doesn’t end before you’ve forever lost the ability to smile. Wheeee, zzzzzip, pop pop pop, wheeeeeeeeeeee.
6 likes
The Who
2/5
As a child, my boomer parents excitedly told me “Pinball Wizard” was from a rock opera one time when it came on the radio. I don’t recall them having much else to say, and having once again tried to glean what’s great about this album, I’d be at a loss to praise it further.
The story is boring. The thematic refrains aren’t interesting enough to warrant sitting through. This is literally the soundtrack to a movie no one gives a fuck about.
3 likes
SZA
2/5
I generally am never grabbed by any r&b, so take my opinion with a million pinches of salt on any album in that genre.
1. Fuck autotune.
2. I understand cultural differences, but feels like a letdown when she uses her slurred, heavily accented delivery because when she just fucking sings, she really can and doesn’t need all the over-processing.
3. Repetition is annoying. I don’t care if you’re saying the weekend, pussy, or whatever. If it’s in every line, I’m annoyed.
4. Too much of the same sound at the same tempo. Snorrrreeee.
3 likes
Crowded House
2/5
No one needs to listen to this unless they have a real hankering for something unremarkable.
3 likes
1-Star Albums (43)
All Ratings
4/5
I understand its significance, but it just doesn’t really hit me as a perfect album. It’s difficult to connect with at times because of the combination of jaunty music with fairly unserious lyrics. It sounds like the soundtrack to a television show that no one watches reruns of anymore. The Beatles always sound to me like they recorded inside a fucking tin can.
Stevie Wonder
5/5
Really enjoyable album from top to bottom. Hits the nostalgia factor as I heard a bunch of these songs often while growing up.
John Coltrane
4/5
The Rolling Stones
4/5
Muddy Waters
4/5
I understand how this leads to a lot of the music I enjoy, but I don’t see myself choosing to listen to the blues very often. I hate harmonicas and the southern fried aesthetics aren’t my cup of tea.
B.B. King
5/5
This is much more the kind of blues I can enjoy. The backing band, especially the horns, sounded great while still allowing King’s guitar and voice to be the stars.
Van Morrison
3/5
Fuck this so much. Every song sounds the same and like the soundtrack to a dentist’s waiting room. His forced “soulful” affectations are cringeworthy. Backing band was tight but I couldn’t stand this.
The Stooges
5/5
Some of the longer songs dial back the aggressive mood, but solid all around.
Beastie Boys
4/5
Dagmar Krause
2/5
Joni Mitchell
2/5
Booker T. & The MG's
4/5
Heard some of these versions my whole life without knowing who it was. Pretty cool.
Ice Cube
4/5
Eels
4/5
Skepta
3/5
Fats Domino
4/5
Serge Gainsbourg
1/5
Stop breathing in my ear dude. There’s absolutely nothing remarkable about this except how quintessentially French it is. Also, this story about pedophilia was especially revolting as I listened to this while taking care of my three year old daughter.
Neil Young
4/5
Good songs but Neil’s voice is grating.
Miles Davis
3/5
Feels harsh to rate this a three, but compared to his later work I can’t rate it higher even if it is the foundation of all that.
Steely Dan
4/5
Grew up on this. Solid album even though some of the vocals are a bit hammy.
Hot Chip
1/5
There is a non-zero amount of broken glass I would rather eat than ever listen to this album again. They’ve effectively combined the worst aspect of 80s synth driven music, disco, and middling vocals to make something less interesting than an old school elevator selection.
Lenny Kravitz
3/5
He’s good at his sound, but it’s never felt like anything special. Just a retro sound with middling lyrics.
Carole King
4/5
A lot of famous songs on this. It sounds so quintessentially 70s, but upon learning this released in ‘71, I’m assuming this was super influential on the sound of that decade. It’s not really my cup of tea, but it’s listenable and I can respect its impact.
Ministry
2/5
This isn’t for me. It’s boring as far as industrial goes. It’s tame for metal. Feels like an experimental art installation you see in a modern art museum and go, “Hm. Interesting, but not worth pondering for long” and then think about where you’re going to get lunch.
Hole
3/5
Foo Fighters
3/5
Wilco
2/5
They’re trying something here that just doesn’t hit right for me. There’s some parts of this album that I find myself nodding along to, but there’s also a lot of discordance for the sake of being discordant. It’s not a tedious listen, but I really wanted this album to be 20-25 minutes shorter.
Os Mutantes
3/5
Thin Lizzy
1/5
This sounds like it was recorded on a potato using two turnips connected by yarn. I generally like thin lizzy but live albums are rarely worth the listen to me.
Violent Femmes
5/5
This album holds up so well and is always a fun listen.
Elton John
2/5
Parliament
4/5
Brian Wilson
1/5
This would be considered too clownish to be a soundtrack to a toddler’s cartoon. If this is a masterpiece, then a toilet spewing the contents of a backed up septic is evidence of divine design of the universe. Nothing on this album is fun, listenable, or anything short of droning and irritating. Good Vibrations is on this for some reason, possibly to remind you what a weak song it is, despite its popularity. I suppose if you like the sound “ooooooh” a lot and really wish there was a more modern take on the barbershop quartet, this is probably for you. Otherwise, I highly recommend keeping functioning ears far away from this album which goes on so long, I’m fairly certain it exists to make sure it doesn’t end before you’ve forever lost the ability to smile. Wheeee, zzzzzip, pop pop pop, wheeeeeeeeeeee.
Talking Heads
3/5
Solid album. Not my favorite by them.
Dexys Midnight Runners
2/5
Loooooooooooooonnnnnnnnngggggggg soooooooooooooooonnnnnnnggggggssssssss because whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
Beastie Boys
4/5
A fun album that kind of drags in the back half due to an almost total vibe change. I dig those tracks when I’m in the mood for them, but they’re definitely not on the same level as the first half of the album.
Creedence Clearwater Revival
3/5
A song off this album is in almost every movie about the 70s it feels like. Some just go on and on doing the same thing. I’m not much of a “jam” type so that’s a bit irritating to me.
Manic Street Preachers
3/5
A name I’ve known for a long time, but never listened to. There’s some really good stuff here. You can hear where this influences bands that came later. However for an hour long album the stuff that grabs you is a bit few and far between.
Peter Gabriel
2/5
So dated. Outside of the nostalgia factor on the hits you already know, this is not a good time.
The Undertones
4/5
This is what I was hoping for when I started this project—someone I’d absolutely never heard of that’s just a good listen, start to finish.
Bill Evans Trio
3/5
I really enjoyed this aside from the bass solos. I know they’re technically impressive, but they just sound grating.
Mike Oldfield
4/5
This was interesting. Started off feeling like the score from “Halloween,” then went just about everywhere else. Will never be a go-to listen, but was well worth the experience.
Joan Baez
2/5
A name I’ve heard for a long time, but never listened to. Not into the warbly voice. Not into the deep cut songs from history. The guitar was good, but this felt like a really dry documentary.
Nirvana
5/5
Beyoncé
1/5
This is either completely shit or it’s just not for me. I can usually see the appeal in pop music even if it’s not what I’m into, but this feels like it’s lacking. The beats are nothing special. The lyrics say almost nothing. She’s never been a particularly interesting vocalist and some of her choices on this album are nothing short of irritating— “No Angel” comes to mind. It leaves one desperately asking, “What was the fucking point of this last hour of my life because there was certainly no point to that album’s existence.”
Grateful Dead
2/5
You either love this stuff or you don’t. I don’t. Jerry Garcia’s voice is lame and clownish. The music is nothing special. I don’t care how much their fans say it’s so different live—a tune I’m not into it is a tune I’m not into.
The Dave Brubeck Quartet
4/5
Amy Winehouse
2/5
She has a unique voice, but this album is dull as dishwater. An hour of mid-90s “smooth jazz” level beige music, her lyrics are largely unintelligible on a first listen because her voice just drones on and on and on without a single hook worth a damn on the whole album, and overall it sounds like something you would hear playing in a Starbucks in the oughts and never wonder to yourself “how can I hear much more of this?”
Johnny Cash
4/5
Dion
1/5
Sounds like the music that would be part of the soundtrack for the types of movies my grandmother liked in the 80s. To use less words, everything about this infinitely sucks. And there’s somehow so much of this album… I was wishing for an aneurysm halfway through the second song. The better songs sounds like c-tier James Taylor, and I am not a James Taylor fan. Most of these songs feature the lyrical prowess one would expect from a very repetitive mushroom of below average intelligence. Layer that on top of music best described as “existing to be a cheap facsimile of other popular artists within the last 20 years of when this was made” and you have something that is just so bland, it is actually exceptional in its own excruciating way.
David Bowie
3/5
An album of mostly strange noises, but not in an offensive way. “Heroes” is a near perfect song.
The Afghan Whigs
3/5
Cowboy Junkies
2/5
All cowboy, no junkie. Whoever made this list loves them some slow country/folk. I guess this is good at what it’s going for but I feel like I just listened to this lady hold a note for an hour with the occasional harmonica interjection. Snore.
Pere Ubu
3/5
I enjoyed this! Felt like something that would’ve sounded contemporary 25 years after it was released, aside from a few of the more discordant for discordance’s sake tracks.
The Velvet Underground
4/5
Billie Holiday
2/5
Man the music is pretty, but just feels so “everything from this era.” Her voice is warbly and weak sounding. A tough listen.
Slayer
4/5
Fun from the first scream.
GZA
4/5
Stevie Wonder
3/5
A fine album with some well-known songs and some pretty mediocre ones.
Elis Regina
3/5
Deep Purple
4/5
The Police
4/5
The Jesus And Mary Chain
3/5
A band named as a major influence for a ton of bands I really like, yet I never got into them. This sounds like something that would grow on me. I’ll need to give it a better listen as my preferred streamer didn’t have it available and the youtube video’s sound quality was questionable.
Lynyrd Skynyrd
4/5
Mostly a fun listen. The southern sensibility on this isn’t as grating as some CCR.
Pearl Jam
4/5
Grunge was in its death throes as I was really getting into music, but nearly all of this album was still being beaten to absolute death by “alternative” radio. As such, I grew sick of most of this album having never listened to the whole thing. It is a pretty damn good album, but I have accepted that I will never outlive my Pearl Jam fatigue, which is only expounded by how many bands did their best Eddie Vedder impressions while making some supremely beige music. It sucks that I can never hear them on their own merits, but that’s my subjective reality.
Scritti Politti
1/5
This is some shitty, empty, soulless horseshit. Absolutely nothing redeeming about this generic, saccharine album. I wish I could go back to my life before I knew this 40 minutes of grating, whiny whispering existed.
Talvin Singh
3/5
It’s fine for what it is. Could’ve died without hearing it and felt no regret. “World music” mixed into electronica is such a painfully late 90s cliche. Someone really loved listening to this while wearing a floppy bucket hat.
Lauryn Hill
3/5
Not really my favorite type of music. Has some high points. The singles are pretty undeniable in their appeal. This album feels 30-45 minutes too long for largely having the same feel all throughout.
Radiohead
5/5
Coldplay
3/5
Some undeniable songs and some droning, bland stuff
Hawkwind
2/5
“I feel like I’m really there!” said an honest person listening to a live album never.
Wayyy too jammy for my taste. The 2 hour plus listening time feels daunting and I really want to just quit after 4.5 tracks.
Various Artists
3/5
Solid enough. Could’ve done without Phil’s victory lap track.
CHVRCHES
2/5
I like a lot of synth driven music and have heard enough hype about this band to give them a listen a few times prior and it just never grabs me. Singer probably could’ve had a mediocre mallpop career in the 80s. I liked her voice more on Science/Visions more where she’s putting some punch behind it, but otherwise it just doesn’t grab me.
Heaven 17
3/5
Some of this is pretty good, but a lot of it is too similar to the rest and you really start to feel that to appreciate this you need at least some of the cocaine that was required to make it.
Pixies
4/5
Talking Heads
4/5
Janet Jackson
4/5
This album was in its heyday when I was in early elementary school. A lot of it sounds dated, in my opinion mainly due to the drums, but there’s no question of the impact this album had on pop music at the time.
Funkadelic
1/5
Nothing on this album justifies listening to the 10 minute wah pedal demonstration it opens with.
The Verve
2/5
Bittersweet symphony is a good song, but suffers like the rest of the album from just going on and on and on and on. All of these songs should be 3/3.5 minutes tops. Dudes love to drone…
Derek & The Dominos
3/5
Good players but god this just goes on and on.
Beach House
2/5
I gave this a few spins back when it came out and my opinion hasn’t really changed. This is just dull.
Suzanne Vega
3/5
I’ve known the name for awhile, but never listened. Like a lot of folky music, if the lyrics don’t speak to you there’s not much else super interesting. Good at times, but largely nondescript.
Air
2/5
Chill. Decent. A bit boring at times.
Stevie Wonder
4/5
Was def dreading a nearly 2 hour listen, but there’s so much good packed into this. The songs I’ve heard a million times it turns out they’re pretty damn good if you haven’t heard them in awhile.
Fatboy Slim
2/5
Started out really enjoying this. Hit a nostalgia nerve the right way and still sounded good. Then I realized 9 years had passed, I’d heard the same 2 phrases 840,000 times and track 2 still had another minute left on it. It was then I remembered why I never bought this album back in the day. Would prob add 2 stars if I had a bunch of ecstasy.
Dire Straits
3/5
A great guitar album, but doesn’t really hit my taste.
Queens of the Stone Age
3/5
I’d listened to most of their catalog previously, but somehow never this album. Solid stuff and you can hear the foundations for their future near perfect work (songs for the deaf).
Common
3/5
Dude was so much better before he rebranded.
The Style Council
2/5
Impressive they can cross so many genres, but this is so dated.
R.E.M.
3/5
Meh.
Crowded House
2/5
No one needs to listen to this unless they have a real hankering for something unremarkable.
Crosby, Stills & Nash
3/5
It’s great if this is what you’re into. It won’t blow away any neutrals though.
The Go-Go's
3/5
Elvis Costello
3/5
It’s fine. I don’t know why but Elvis Costello has never done it for me. It’s not aggrieving in any way, just doesn’t spark anything.
Gene Clark
2/5
Brutally dull. 70s singer/songwriter cliche.
Antony and the Johnsons
1/5
God this voice is annoying. No thanks.
The Temptations
3/5
Elton John
3/5
Deep Purple
4/5
High energy and fun. Songs go on a bit long and circus-y feeling at times.
Frank Zappa
4/5
Frank was weird and not always my cup of tea, but always brilliant. This was a good listen after many years since my last listen.
Moby Grape
2/5
Absolutely nothing special. Inoffensive.
Barry Adamson
3/5
Interesting listen. Don’t think I’ll listen to it again, but it wasn’t a chore to listen to at all.
The Louvin Brothers
2/5
It is beyond me how anyone likes that whiny, twangy, voice crack thing. There are songs (not on this album) that are so good, I can enjoy them in spite of it, but it’s genuinely confounding how that’s such a pervasive aesthetic in an American music.
I’m really not quite sure what’s so special about this album. It did give me a greater appreciation for Nirvana’s version of “in the pines.”
Cat Stevens
2/5
Kind of all just blends together aside from the songs you already know.
Curtis Mayfield
3/5
All the falsetto loses my attention. Otherwise good.
David Bowie
3/5
Pretty enjoyable. Some of it felt directionless.
Rage Against The Machine
5/5
Massive album that only grows in stature and, sadly, relevance.
Buck Owens
2/5
Well, it was definitely country.
Bob Dylan
2/5
Boring. Shit voice. It’s a Dylan album. For all of his renown, most songs offer nothing particularly interesting lyrically, so even the one thing all the Dylan-worshippers beat you over the head with is absent here.
More of the boring version of the blues that white men of a certain age love to flog to death. You can hear this album at any local blues open mic, and probably with better vocals.
Listened to three minutes of this sixteen and a half minute final track before scanning forward to see if it was ever going to do anything else. It doesn’t. Fuck you, Bob.
The Smiths
4/5
None of their best songs are on this album, but it’s still a great listen. Never get tired of Johnny Marr.
Buena Vista Social Club
3/5
Deep Purple
2/5
Life is way too short to listen to jam bands. Unfortunately, it seems the band’s approach to their live show was to take otherwise decent music and stretch it into jammy nonsense. Maybe if I had nothing better to do than psychedelics all day I’d feel better about a 20 minute version of Space Truckin, but as it stands I’m rather fucking agitated. So boring and self-indulgent. Maybe they could’ve done some more gibberish wailing and stretched these ten songs into a four hour concert.
The The
3/5
Cream
3/5
Some good songs, but like a lot of psychedelia prone to a lot of meh. The drugs really are needed to fill in the boredom, apparently.
The Kinks
4/5
Just st enjoyable, well-made pop rock.
Talking Heads
5/5
Particularly enjoyed listening wind. Enjoyed this start to finish.
New Order
2/5
Just feels kind of pointless. Like it’s fine if you want to dance to it, but it’s not great to just listen to. Lyrics don’t grab me.
I sometimes wonder if I’m harsh on New Order for not being more Joy Division, but I keep trying and nothing but the occasional song grabs me.
Black Sabbath
4/5
Some really good stuff here, but I lost interest by the end.
SZA
2/5
I generally am never grabbed by any r&b, so take my opinion with a million pinches of salt on any album in that genre.
1. Fuck autotune.
2. I understand cultural differences, but feels like a letdown when she uses her slurred, heavily accented delivery because when she just fucking sings, she really can and doesn’t need all the over-processing.
3. Repetition is annoying. I don’t care if you’re saying the weekend, pussy, or whatever. If it’s in every line, I’m annoyed.
4. Too much of the same sound at the same tempo. Snorrrreeee.
Burning Spear
3/5
I’m not sure I could tell the difference between good and bad reggae. It’s all kind of the same thing. The flute adds a nice touch, but mostly I find it hard to listen to the same exact thing with almost no variation for 3-4 minutes. Some of the lyrics seemed poignant, but I largely struggled to make out what was being said.
The Stone Roses
3/5
Kinda just goes on and on like listening to a really bored person pretending they’re having feelings about something. I’ve long heard this band lauded, but every time I give them a shot it just doesn’t land for me. Feels like something that maybe you had to be part of the zeitgeist to appreciate.
Traffic
3/5
Doesn’t really stand out much from anything else you already know from this era. I’m really getting burnt on all the late 60s/early 70s this list is feeding me.
Frank Sinatra
4/5
The Getz/Gilberto version of “Girl from Ipanima” will always define the song for me, but nothing was bad about this one.
Never been the biggest Sinatra fan (he gets wayyy overplayed when you grow up in New Jersey), but thought it was really cool listening to the studio sessions track where he goes through the song three straight times. Hearing him trying out different expressions of the same lyrics was interesting insight into the process where I’ve mostly only heard what feels like a very (somewhat over) polished final product.
Germs
4/5
Solid early west coast punk. Bummer they didn’t get to do more.
Kanye West
1/5
Nowhere near as good as his early albums. Most of this is pretty dull and too reliant on vocal after effects as opposed to good lines delivered well.
Whatever I would’ve rated this, it gets a 1 because I refuse to separate this art from the scumbag the artist has become. Take your meds, Kanye.
The Band
4/5
Not my favorite sound, but they do it well.
Amy Winehouse
5/5
Amy’s voice already sounded like it belonged in a smoke filled, old school jazz club where everyone in attendance was the type of person to have 24/7 alcohol sweats. Adding a retro doo-wop influence into the music along with lyrics that would suit the aforementioned type of imagined audience was just the perfect confluence of apropos.
Kanye West
1/5
I’d probably have rated this a 3 or 4, but it gets a 1 because of who Kanye has shown himself to be. Bad enough I got him some more royalties by playing this.
3/5
It’s fine. I like the kinks, but I am really so tired of this list feeding me 60s rock. It all starts sounding the same, and it’s getting hard to take individual albums on their own merit. This is easily the third kinks album I’ve had already out of like 130 albums. On top of that moby grape, cream, deep purple x 3, traffic, etc. It’s too damn much.
Hole
3/5
Can’t for the life of me figure out what’s so special about this. Has some decent enough songs-the singles in particular are the standouts. The rest is just late 90s “we don’t want to be grunge anymore, but we don’t really have a better idea, so here’s…this.”
4/5
Country is not my thing, but this is completely tolerable. She doesn’t twang her voice to hell. The lyrics are simple, but not stupid or Jesus-ed to oblivion. The music is on point, and the songs get to their point and then end. The 28 minute run time is absolutely no chore whatsoever which is about the best compliment I’ve ever given a country album.
Duke Ellington
3/5
Ray Price
4/5
Turns out if you take the twangy voice out of it, I don’t really mind older country music. It’ll never be a go to, but it was fine as Monday morning coffee background music.
Motörhead
3/5
Sounds like an awesome set, and I do enjoy Motorhead. However, this sucks in the same way as every other fucking live album ever has. It doesn’t really capture how it would’ve sounded if you were there, and instead leaves you feeling like you’re listening to music with cotton balls in your ears.
Aretha Franklin
5/5
I’d never listened to an Aretha album despite being familiar with her hits. This isn’t my favorite type of music, but this was good! Everything about this album felt on point.
Ash
3/5
I undoubtedly would have loved this album if I’d heard it when it came out. Kind of death knell 90s alt-rock, kind of pop-punk… but nearly 30 years later I’ve heard a million things like it and at least half of them did some of it better. It’s fine.
The Vines
2/5
I definitely go into this with preconceived notions. I worked in a major record store chain when this album released and undoubtedly listened to it dozens, if not a hundred, times at work. The fact I have no memory of the album, aside from disapproval and hating the single, doesn’t bode well. Of the early aughts garage revival with “the” bands, The Vines were easily my least favorite. Get Free annoyed the hell out of me. I vastly preferred The Hives and even The Strokes. Let’s see if 20 some odd years changes my mind…
Most of this still listens like a dollar store version of Oasis. Get Free is the only track with any energy and it’s still annoyingly repetitive. Think I’d rather have dental surgery than ever listen to the droning Country Yard ever again. This album feels really directionless and shallow. These dudes were probably the best around in a weak local scene so they thought they could get by with songs that just poorly (yet in a painfully obvious manner) aped their influences while adding absolutely nothing interesting or novel. How a record exec bought the hype and splurged on the marketing to make them a one hit wonder is beyond comprehension.
I really look forward to when this album ends. Too bad 1969 wants to do the same thing over and over again for 3 hours.
Can’t always say my opinions as an 18 year old were valid, but I still agree with me on this album. You can miss this and die without regret.
Kraftwerk
3/5
I’ve always heard of them being influential to some artists I like, but never listened to them. It was okay as background music, but I think this just doesn’t stand up since electronic music has come so far since this time.
Willie Nelson
2/5
Not a lot here aside from his voice. Makes this a tough listen for a non-country fan.
The Mothers Of Invention
2/5
This sucked. I’m already tired of how often this list feeds me 60s rock. There’s nothing special about this flavor of psychedelia unless you find these dudes sarcastic “wit” more amusing than I did. Highlight of this album was their facetious doo wop song, merely for the fact that it didn’t sound like everything else on the album or have any irritating Alvin and the Chipmunks vocal effects. Frustrating listen.
Green Day
4/5
I listened to this album a ton when it came out. I liked a handful of songs and others grew on me with repeated listens.
Having listened to it for the first time in at least 15 years, I’m back to my original feelings toward it. Largely the radio singles and a couple other tunes are really solid songs. The rest is just way too broadway feeling for me. Considering that’s exactly what they did with this, it seems mission accomplished from their perspective.
This was the first time I’ve heard the bonus tracks on the deluxe version. None stood out and they don’t immediately seem to fit the somewhat cohesive story of the original album.
U2
4/5
A much more listenable version of U2 than what they became in the last 25 years or so.
Quicksilver Messenger Service
2/5
They’re good at what they do, but they only do that one thing for nearly an hour. It’s a good groove at first, then you let it fade to being background music, and when it inevitably hits your conscious thoughts again you wonder very strongly, “How the fuck am I still listening to this same song??” Then you realize it’s track 7 and you were roused from ignoring the music because the six track thematic opening ended. That seems like good news, but it really is somehow still the same song, just called something else.
This list is way too 60s heavy. Not every band making 14 minute improvised songs needs to be heard. I would argue most of them absolutely don’t need to be. Like it has its interesting moments, but they’re interspersed with such long periods of absolute dross that the payoff isn’t worth it. Makes for good samples. Makes for decent music in a movie scene. As a whole listen, though? Only if you have the required narcotics.
Moby
5/5
Despite being into almost nothing aside from punk when this came out, I bought this album off the strength of a few of the singles. I didn’t love the whole album, but appreciated a lot of it.
Having not listened to this in probably 20 years, we can consider this a fresh listen. I was nervous going in because the Fatboy Slim album the list previously gave me was so painfully repetitive. I was blown away by this album top to bottom though. It’s so well made and nothing repeats to the point of aggravation. This is masterful work. Probably the best compliment I can pay this album is that I’m voluntarily going to listen to the version that includes all the b-sides and adds an hour to the runtime.
David Holmes
2/5
Sooooo boring. If you want some typical late 90s electronica layered with messages from this dude’s microcassette using answering machine, have at it.
Yeah Yeah Yeahs
3/5
Some really great songs and a bunch of so-so.
The The
3/5
I will always love “This Is The Day.” The rest of the album has never really spoken to me as much. Long and fairly repetitive songs just aren’t my thing. I understand this was pretty early in things moving toward synth music in the 80s, so in some ways it was setting the tone but it just sounds so dated now. Electronic drum sounds just suck 99% of the time.
Thundercat
4/5
What the actual fuck is this album and why do I love it so much??
Beastie Boys
4/5
This isn’t really meant to be thought hard about, or maybe you can think hard about it after half a case of piss flavored light beer. It’s stupid and fun and stupid fun. We were all young, sweaty, and cringeworthy as hell at some point.
Iggy Pop
4/5
Not at all what I was expecting from an Iggy Pop album. Solid post-punk that gets extra consideration for being pretty early to the genre.
The Hives
4/5
I’ve always liked this album but I forgot how good it is as a whole. For me, this was the best of the early 00s garage revival.
The Velvet Underground
4/5
Credit for what it meant in its time.
Aerosmith
3/5
Some iconic songs. A lot of meh, including a “my big dick” joke that goes on way too long. Steven Tyler is a shitbird, but I’m not going to kill the whole review for that.
Gang Starr
4/5
Lou Reed
3/5
Felt like the back half of this album had a lot more to it.
The Flaming Lips
4/5
I don’t love Coyne’s vocals, but every single song on this album is mood inducing to the point that you stop noticing these dudes are really fucking weird.
Kings of Leon
2/5
This could be better if dude wasn’t completely unintelligible.
Aphex Twin
3/5
75 minutes of decent background music. Little else.
Lana Del Rey
1/5
The audio equivalent of sitting in a mechanic’s smelly, dirty, and uncomfortable waiting room while they fix your alignment. You know you’re doing this for a reason, but you also know the only real payoff is you eventually get to leave.
The producer on this really made it so much worse than it had to be, although rescuing 11 dirges sung in the key of bored as fuck is nigh impossible.
OutKast
2/5
Back in the day, I preferred the love below. I now emphatically think it sucks. Dragged this down from a 3-4 rating.
Ride
2/5
Nothing grabbed me. Nothing stabbed me. It existed and so did I, together probably only this once somehow completely unaware of each other’s presence.
Harry Nilsson
4/5
Been years since I listened to this. Kinda fizzles out for the last few tracks, but otherwise really enjoyed it.
Taylor Swift
2/5
Guess it’s a fine pop album, but it feels pretty vapid. Not sure why I needed to hear this before I die.
Emmylou Harris
2/5
This sucks. It sounds like every other album from every other artist 20-30 years past their heyday was putting out at this time. All the boredom of easy listening, plus all the unrelatability of most country/folk, and topped of with a big pile of who gives a flying fuck about this simple guitar that you need to extend every song by 60-120 seconds so I can hear more of it.
Sufjan Stevens
2/5
His voice is grating. The music is like looking into a kaleidoscope: it’s colorful and the patterns are interesting, then after 7 seconds you never need to look at a kaleidoscope again…but there’s an hour and fifteen minutes of this.
Tears For Fears
4/5
Obviously the singles were all really strong songs. The rest of the album has some high points, but largely without the benefit of nostalgia helping this sound is just super dated.
The Auteurs
3/5
Started out sounding like something I’d really be into, but it didn’t hold up. The singer’s John Lennon impression gets pretty tired after awhile and there’s nothing really special about any of it.
Einstürzende Neubauten
4/5
Don’t think this deserves the absolute hate it gets. It’s for sure a challenging listen, but it’s at least something different and provokes a reaction. Do much of this list has already been of the “oh god, more of this?” type that something genuinely different really stands out.
Donald Fagen
3/5
Don’t really see how this is any better than a lot of Steely Dan. It’s okay.
Metallica
4/5
Some absolutely legendary songs on this album. Loses a star for sounding too clean and a bit over-produced at times.
Ella Fitzgerald
2/5
I listened to a third of this. Over three hours is an excessive ask for music that all sounds very samey. She’s a hell of a singer. The composition is era defining. I don’t need to hear it all in a row. Any song in particular is a four star song, but I’m giving this two stars because unless you love tgis exact sound, this is a shit listen.
Rush
4/5
I enjoyed the music. Really don’t care for Geddy’s voice and never have.
A Tribe Called Quest
4/5
Really solid, although I’m always more partial to Midnight Marauders.
Morrissey
3/5
It’s ok. Morrissey outside of the smiths never does much for me.
Supergrass
3/5
Some really fun stuff here and a lot that sort of just is. I’m also tired of this vocal type. Feels like every third or fourth British band I listen to has this exact vocal style.
U2
2/5
This is exactly where U2 became boring beyond all compare. Bono is not insufferable, only because I managed to suffer this.
Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
3/5
Feels like something my appreciation for might grow with repeated listens, but for a first listen it’s just not grabbing me.
Drive-By Truckers
1/5
I really tried to get through this. It’s so boring and just as awful as it is long.
The Prodigy
4/5
This was a refreshingly strong wind after days stuck in the doldrums of a horribly dull and long Drive By Truckers album. I heard the radio singles off this album a ton as I entered my teenage years, but had never listened to the whole album. I enjoyed it, but felt every song went on at least a minute too long. The repetitive nature of this type of electronic music is what tends to turn me off from it. I like cool sounds, but I don’t need to hear them so many times in a row.
Curtis Mayfield
4/5
Alanis Morissette
5/5
The Byrds
1/5
Can’t wait until the last of the boomers are gone and we can stop pretending every wet fart from the 60s was groundbreaking.
Christina Aguilera
1/5
Jesus fucking christ. This album is so fucking long for no reason. A self-indulgent five minute track of fan voicemails? Check. A pop singer who lost popularity claiming a return to their roots throwing in some gospel influenced tracks? Check.
She can definitely sing, but they overproduce her voice on every single track. This is nothing special.
Yes
3/5
Really fun in places and pretty meh in others.
Jurassic 5
4/5
First heard this group from a demo cassette handed out at warped tour back in 2000. Bought this when it released and it still holds up really well.
MC Solaar
3/5
I’m not sure what others are hearing here that sounds so unique compared to other late 80s/early 90s hip hop. Sounds like dude has a good flow, but without knowing what he’s saying, a lot of what I find to appreciate in a skilled rapper isn’t available. Like if you’re rhyming your grocery list it’s not as impressive as telling a story or making a political statement. Actually, I can’t even tell if this rhymes half the time.
Slade
3/5
Ugh. It’s fine for what it is. They’re a solid product of their time, while innovating nothing. Not as good as the Beatles, the Stones, or Zeppelin who they clearly bite from. If I wanted more of that sound, this would be great but really I’m tired of this kind of music both from this playlist and from it being used in commercials to sell all kinds of crap my whole life, and from being bombarded with “classic rock” radio all of the place for decades. Nothing essential to a complete life to be found on this album.
3/5
It has its moments, but a little of most of these songs go a long way and they unfortunately haven’t heard of the essence of wit.
Guns N' Roses
4/5
This is the best of what the hair metal era had to offer and I still can’t give it a five. For all the strength of the hits, a few of the tracks are just absolutely nothing.
Snoop Dogg
3/5
Snoop has a great delivery and the beats are fun and cool, but the lyrics are predictable at best and ignorant at worst.
Kraftwerk
4/5
Really enjoyed this. Crazy how well this holds up.
The War On Drugs
2/5
This album starts off with a dollar store Don Henley and ends with dollar store Arcade Fire. I’ll give them an additional star for proving they can actually change the drums since they were exactly the same for the bulk of this album.
Eminem
4/5
If you can’t bring yourself to believe this is satire, you’re gonna hate this. Or you should, anyway. I’m only giving this a four because the intent is veiled enough that this really reinforced some negative beliefs for some imperceptive people.
Red Hot Chili Peppers
4/5
Is this the quintessential non-grunge early 90s alt rock album? It’s hard to say if this sounds like it to me because this was the sound at the time or if this album defined that time. It’s really good and yet I still always can’t stand something about RHCP.
The Zombies
3/5
It’s good psychedelia, even if at times it just feels like an attempt to modernize the barbershop quartet or even chamber music. In the end, nothing is worth remembering aside from time of the season.
1/5
No. Fuck you, Bob.
King Crimson
3/5
Good, but blown out of the water by bands that came later and did it better.
Neil Young & Crazy Horse
3/5
Neil Young’s voice is grating.
Santana
4/5
My favorite thing about this album was the runtime being under an hour, unlike the last 8 albums this list gave me. The guitar is also awesome.
Bee Gees
2/5
I had no idea the BeeGees started their career as the Wannabeatles. Thanks for the cursed knowledge and the nap.
Bon Jovi
1/5
On behalf of the sane people from the Garden State, you suck Jon.
Giant Sand
1/5
Chore. Bore. Snore. Please no more.
50 Cent
2/5
Overrated tripe. We all disliked JaRule, but this was vapid crap too.
Beatles
3/5
There’s some beautiful stuff here written by a complete dirtbag.
Cee Lo Green
2/5
This album doesn’t matter at all. His weird helium voice gets super annoying.
Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
2/5
I just don’t get the appeal.
Gene Clark
2/5
Boring when it’s not country, and aggravating when it is.
The Who
3/5
The singles are long dead and have only stopped bleeding because the last of their blood was drained by classic rock radio sometime around 2001. The rest of the album is nothing remarkable, even sounding like rehashes of other songs on the album at times.
The Bees
3/5
Mellow and enjoyable, though thoroughly unremarkable. I’ve begun to suspect the curator of this list is either very easily impressed or more concerned with the narrative around the work than the actuality of what hits your ears.
Nick Drake
4/5
Extra star for realizing more than half an hour of solo acoustic music with a soothing, somewhat dull voice would be just too much.
Otis Redding
4/5
This was an enjoyable listen top to bottom.
Kacey Musgraves
3/5
I didn’t hate it so it’s better than most country/pop albums in my book. It doesn’t feel like anything special outside of that metric though.
Pink Floyd
4/5
A whole that’s much less than some of its parts. Still quite good, but there’s too much of this that’s just there or exists only to set up something else.
Marty Robbins
3/5
Wasn’t in the mood for this and never understood the obsession with cowboys. That said, it wasn’t grating or hard to just let it be background noise.
Morrissey
2/5
Irish Blood, English Heart and First of the Gang to Die are good songs. The rest? No.
Van Morrison
2/5
45 minutes of being whined, whispered, and wailed at by a man who either has or, even worse, is pretending to have a speech impediment.
Cyndi Lauper
4/5
On the one hand, this album couldn’t be more dated if it was called Lots of 80s Synth! On the other hand, it works pretty damn well without being as stale as most of the reprocessed mall-pop that imitated it and made us sick of that sound.
Ryan Adams
3/5
Ugh. More alt-country I’ve been recommended a ton of times and never enjoyed.
To Be Young is an okay song, but the rest of this kinda just keeps happening without much of a point to its existence.
I truly loathe this where it goes more country and merely tolerate it where it’s fairly generic rock. There’s nothing remarkable about the lyrics and the pacing on many of the songs is nothing short of tedious.
There’s a group of people who love Ryan Adams, Wilco, My Morning Jacket, etc. that I tend to have a lot of shared musical taste with, but this stuff just never does it for me.
LCD Soundsystem
3/5
I think I’d need to listen to this a few more times to really rate it fairly. I enjoyed it, but not to the level of prior albums. Still good, though.
The Young Gods
2/5
Tom Waits sings in French over B-tier early Nine Inch Nails. Unfortunately, this isn’t that good. Maybe if I understood French, there’s something amazing happening lyrically here, but as it stands it felt like 80% of this album was a dude growling at me over a shitty, thin sounding, and uninspired snare drum. Another 10% was the first five minutes of the album, comprised of nothing but repetitive, purposely off-key carnival music and growly man attempting to actually sing and then sing like a creepy circus ringmaster. That’s 90% of the album that feels, at best, like a moderately interesting experiment.
The Cars
4/5
Not every song on the album is a winner, but it’s damn close. I’ve always had a soft spot for Just What I Needed.
The Strokes
3/5
This album came out my senior year of high school when I was also working in a major chain record store, so I heard a ton of it and it really takes me to a specific time and place.
The album holds up pretty well, aside from the decision to put the same distortion on the vocals on every single track. It serves a purpose on some songs, but on others it just has the effect of making the entire album very same sounding.
Marilyn Manson
1/5
I never liked this when it came out, didn’t care for anything he did later, and absolutely despise abusers and rapists. Won’t listen now and get him any royalties. I remember this as being really cheesy and over the top edgelord crap anyway.
The Temptations
3/5
Not bad for expanding outside their Motown comfort zone.
Laibach
2/5
I don’t understand the aesthetic of just looping something 90 times a minute with a tinny sounding snare and Sousa march sounding bass drums, so I didn’t particularly enjoy this album that either is the source of the stereotype of German 80s music or is just the stereotype distilled into its quintessence.
Meat Loaf
3/5
It’s just not my favored aesthetic at all. If you’re into maximum unsubtle, good for you.
4/5
Devo is so fucking weird in the right way.
Daft Punk
4/5
Definitely pretty incredible how they can make relatively long and repetitive songs not get boring or agitating.
N.W.A.
4/5
Mylo
3/5
Not even a remotely important album, but it was an ok listen for a long drive running errands.
The Rolling Stones
5/5
You probably have heard all of these songs without actually listening to this album, which is both testament to the strength of the album and emblematic of the Stones’ oversaturation which results in a type of fatigue at hearing their music, in my opinion. My first instinct is to give this a four, but I have no good reason to take away a star.
Goldie
2/5
Brutally long. Not for me or anyone else who doesn’t like hearing the same thing over and over again for an average of seven minutes and an at worst of 21 minutes.
The Kinks
4/5
While I’m quite tired of all the 60s stuff on this list, this was a good listen and didn’t feel like a re-tread or beaten to death.
The Birthday Party
4/5
I’m really glad I made it past the first few tracks. She’s Hit is a long, boring slog that felt like if The Misfits had all the codeine before going into record. The album really picks up after the first version of Dead Joe though. I respect Nick Cave, but generally don’t enjoy his music. This rawer, less “ooh I’m making some sort of spooky murder mystery dinner theater” shtick version works for me.
Nirvana
5/5
This came out a solid 4 or 5 years before I was an angsty teenager, so I don’t think it’s just era nostalgia that makes me love this album. Smells Like Teen Spirit has taken every kind of attempt to beat it to death and still holds up despite not even being in the top half of my favorite songs on this album.
Joni Mitchell
2/5
I listened to it. It ended. Moving on.
Incredible Bongo Band
3/5
There’s some really fun stuff here but I really didn’t need over an hour of it.
The Clash
5/5
Run-D.M.C.
4/5
Blur
3/5
Honestly, I really like some Blur, but this is just too damn much Blur.
Bob Dylan
1/5
More Dylan. Supposedly prime Dylan. It still sucks. Fuck you, Bob.
Country Joe & The Fish
1/5
Fuck. All. This. God. Damned. 60s. Nonsense. Enough already!!!!
Leonard Cohen
3/5
If you tell a good story in the most boring way possible, is it a good story? This isn’t my thing.
Beatles
3/5
It’s quality for being what it is. Still really heavily blues influenced and nothing particularly innovative happening yet here, but it’s kind of nice to listen to a beatles album that doesn’t have 6 or 7 songs the radio has milked dry.
The Police
2/5
I listened to this whole album and can’t figure out what it’s good at. Mediocre culture theft?
Yes
3/5
Some of this is pretty fun, but there’s a lot of this.
Sex Pistols
4/5
On influence alone, this should probably be a five, but there are a few stretches on this album that get kinda dull which says a lot on a punk album with relatively short songs.
Nanci Griffith
2/5
Hooray! It ended!
Aretha Franklin
5/5
Not my thing most days, but there really isn’t a bad song on here.
Charles Mingus
3/5
Parts of this are so off-putting that it’s 100% the jazz ppl think of when they say they don’t like jazz despite never having listened to jazz. A bunch of this just sounds like the worst kind of all night bender feels.
Bob Dylan
1/5
No. Fuck you, Bob.
Alice Cooper
4/5
This felt really theatrical at times, and it was a pleasant surprise that it wasn’t just the title track rehashed 12 slightly different ways. Solid classic rock, but strays enough from that sound to prevent fatigue.
Prince
4/5
Jungle Brothers
4/5
Willie Colón & Rubén Blades
4/5
I’m not going to pretend I know a lot about this type of music. It sounds really clean and well executed, but also at times sounds like very run of the mill 70s music with a latin flair.
Pink Floyd
5/5
Literally every time I listen to this album, there’s at least two or three moments I wonder if I’ll ever contrive something even remotely as perfect as a particular lyric or guitar line. These guys made a whole album that perfect.
Fela Kuti
4/5
Really enjoyed this despite it not being what I’m really into and the songs being pretty long.
Marvin Gaye
4/5
Napalm Death
3/5
I didn’t understand a single lyric. I can’t remember a melody that grabbed me. I’ll never voluntarily listen to this again. Yet, I get it in the context that it’s something really different from a lot of what’s on this list.
Radiohead
4/5
Not their best album, but still full of really impressive stuff.
Alice In Chains
4/5
I appreciate everything about this album. I even like some of the songs, but Alice in Chains has never fully won me over in 30+ years of trying. Don’t know why, but art’s subjective so minus a star.
Dr. Dre
3/5
Yeah enough other people have already said it. Important album that talks way too much about dick.
David Bowie
4/5
Hugh Masekela
5/5
This is what I signed up for.
Massive Attack
5/5
Really enjoyed this. I’ve heard tracks here and there but never listened to a whole album of theirs. Guess I’ve been missing out.
Teenage Fanclub
4/5
Super mellow for the most part but I liked this a lot.
Elliott Smith
4/5
Solomon Burke
4/5
Never heard of this guy and so pleasantly surprised.
Sleater-Kinney
3/5
Love the energy. Love love love the guitars. Sometimes okay with the vocals.
Leonard Cohen
2/5
This is just so dull. If there’s something amazing in these lyrics, I’m missing it. Sounds like the kind of poetry you get in creative writing 101. Traveling Light threatens to be interesting at times.
New Order
4/5
I have never found an appreciation for New Order anywhere near what I have for Joy Division, but this album really surprised me. Think I need to give it a few more listens.
Genesis
2/5
Shivkumar Sharma
4/5
I appreciate the musicianship here but the ample notebending/vibrato and shrill flute sounds are just never aesthetically pleasing to me. The rhythm stuff here is awesome, but I won’t ever listen to this again.
Pink Floyd
5/5
Les Rythmes Digitales
2/5
The first track sounded like something from the soundtrack to sonic the hedgehog 2. Not the movie. The video game that preceded this album by 9 years. It didn’t get better from there. Disco to disco to disco to just fucking end me.
Finley Quaye
1/5
Shallow crap. It’s like an entire album conceived to be the background music for tampon and glucose monitor commercials.
Steely Dan
3/5
Not my favorite by them by a long mile, but solid enough.
Leonard Cohen
2/5
I’ve been bored and I’ve been sad, bit I don’t think I’ve ever been bored and/or sad enough for this.
Def Leppard
1/5
Literally no band outside of the hair metal genre has cited Def Leppard as a massive influence in the nearly 40 years this album had existed. Yes, it had radio singles. Yes, their drummer lost an arm. Yes, this sucks as big and loud as it could legally suck.
The Cure
5/5
Bob Marley & The Wailers
3/5
I didn’t hate this, but it also does nothing for me. I’ve never been moved by reggae in any way. Just feels very simplistic and moves at a speed that my life does not, and I wouldn’t want it to.
The White Stripes
2/5
Blue Orchid is a fun song, but 90% of this album is some kind of forgettable background dross that only stays at the front of your brain bc Jack White’s screechy voice keeps stabbing your eardrums.
John Prine
1/5
I don’t care how “not country” this is. It’s country, and I don’t like it.
Elvis Presley
2/5
The man can sing and steal culture for sure. This is pretty boring and for all the emotion he tries to convey, you know none of this is his work at all. The man was just a meaty speaker spurting sounds he hoped you’d pay him for.
Madonna
1/5
Boring, typical pop. Nothing that has to be heard here.
Ramblin' Jack Elliott
2/5
I like his voice, and the album was short enough, but man old folk tunes just suck.
Brian Eno
4/5
Led Zeppelin
5/5
Miles Davis
5/5
An overcast autumn day was the perfect backdrop for listening to this.
Rod Stewart
2/5
This album sucks on so many levels. Firstly, a few of the songs are mixed in such a way that the vocals are absolutely buried, so you feel like you’re both listening to someone mumbling in a crowded room, but somehow how they’re also raspily shouting at you. The more “rocking” songs have no punch. The more folky/country/blues songs have no soul. Every single song is repetitive as all get out. Die happy having never listened to this.
Jorge Ben Jor
3/5
The Saints
3/5
Nothing special, but enjoyable.
Manu Chao
3/5
I found his “South American” accent super annoying. Otherwise this is fairly bland and inoffensive music, but nothing that connects with me.
Dwight Yoakam
1/5
I hate country twang. Cry in someone else’s ear.
Bob Marley & The Wailers
3/5
Not for me.
Spacemen 3
2/5
I would call this interminably dull, but mercifully it does actually have an ending.
Happy Mondays
3/5
Doesn’t do anything for me, but it’s not awful.
David Bowie
4/5
Taylor Swift
1/5
God this is dull. While I’m a fan of cohesive albums, this is like a gradient of all the most inoffensive beiges—everything sounds like everything else and everything sounds fucking boring.
Fela Kuti
4/5
Really enjoyed this.
Minor Threat
4/5
Muddy Waters
3/5
Minus a star because this songs aren’t interesting enough to listen to four of them twice on the same 45 minute album.
Bob Marley & The Wailers
3/5
Third Bob Marley album in as many weeks. It’s not bad, it just does nothing for me. I nod my head along every now and then, but mostly I wait for it to end.
Michael Jackson
4/5
Honestly really enjoyable aside from the super saccharine “She’s Out of My Life” that just dated this way harder than any of the disco influenced stuff.
PJ Harvey
2/5
Thought I was going to end up really liking this, but it just never seemed to get there for me. Not that it necessarily sounds dated, but the way this is a cornucopia of off kilter things rather than just a particular type of odd is probably the most early 90s thing this could be.
Tom Waits
3/5
Not my favorite album from him, but has its moments.
Al Green
4/5
Neil Young & Crazy Horse
3/5
This is really nothing special for a late 70s rock album, and Neil Young still has an irritating voice.
Orbital
2/5
This was irritating at worst and just too long at its best. I’m not the greatest aficionado of electronic music, but I’ve heard enough to know it doesn’t have to be shitty neverending loops of vocal samples and odd sounds for 6 or 7 minutes at a time.
Herbie Hancock
4/5
Never knew this guy as anything except the dude who bit Huey Lewis’ sound for the Ghostbusters theme. This was pretty enjoyable and not too long.
Kate Bush
3/5
Koffi Olomide
1/5
I officially do not enjoy this type of music unless I’m playing Mariokart. All of these songs are 3-5 minutes too long. Seems like dude’s a prick to boot.
Jerry Lee Lewis
1/5
Good player. Historically important. Shit human.
Wu-Tang Clan
4/5
Ice T
3/5
I enjoyed a lot of this, but some of it falls pretty flat some 30 odd years later.
Kendrick Lamar
3/5
The Killers
3/5
Meh. Never cared for this and still don’t. I’ll give it a three for Mr. Brightside and some of the music, but much of the lyrics on this mean absolutely nothing at best and are total idiocy at worst (Somebody Told Me).
Love
4/5
I’m pretty tired of all the psychedelia on this list by now, but this one was pretty good. Well-executed with enough outside influences shining through that this didn’t feel like a rehash of everything else from the genre.
The Clash
5/5
The Flying Burrito Brothers
2/5
So boring.
Ray Charles
3/5
This was better listen than I was expecting. It really doesn’t sound very country or western at all. However, all the songs start sounding like every other orchestra backed 40s/50s song and the run time is way too long.
Nick Drake
4/5
Death In Vegas
3/5
I found myself nodding along to a lot of this. Unfortunately, some of these songs just really don’t need to be 5-7 minutes long.
Beck
3/5
I never really enjoy Beck’s downtempo stuff as much. This has some great songs for when you’re just in that kind of mood, but there’s a ton of filler that all sounds like each other. Cut the run time by a third, and gain a star.
M.I.A.
3/5
It’s fine. Easy to ignore until it’s over. Sometimes interesting.
Missy Elliott
3/5
Nas
4/5
The Doors
3/5
Red Snapper
2/5
Repetitive and boring. Don’t understand what is special about this compared to every other electronica album circa 1996-2000.
Jimi Hendrix
4/5
I appreciate the historical significance, but there’s honestly not very much here that’s super impressive to people with the subsequent ~60 years of music history available to them.
Queen
3/5
The high points on this album are undeniable. Freddy Mercury’s voice and the production are incredible. That said, I don’t dig the theatre for a reason and this album is full of it. I don’t find playful whimsy and sounds for the sake of making sounds particularly fun.
Metallica
3/5
So boring at times. Just goes on and on.
Sebadoh
4/5
Massive Attack
3/5
Radiohead
4/5
3/5
Robert Wyatt
1/5
Just a lot of noises.
Beck
4/5
Alexander 'Skip' Spence
3/5
Some decent stuff. A lot of forgettable droning.
Dinosaur Jr.
4/5
D'Angelo
1/5
Every song is 4-6 minutes of the same two lyrics until you jam a screwdriver in your ear and scream about how you’ve done nothing to deserve this torture.
Dusty Springfield
3/5
Not my cup of tea, but she’s got a great voice. Always fun hearing Brits over accent the hard a sounds in words like man, can, etc.
Led Zeppelin
4/5
The Go-Betweens
3/5
This was a welcome change from another stretch of 60s/70s music, but I’m not getting what’s so important about it.
The Mamas & The Papas
3/5
Prefab Sprout
1/5
I never wondered to myself what it would sound like if someone decided to bite from the smiths, billy idol, and wham all on one album while throwing in a lounge tune bc fuck it, why not? But now I have the answer.
After the first two smiths-light sounding tracks, I thought I might be in for a pleasant surprise but by the end, I wanted to punch this singer in the face as often as he repeated the same three unclever lines in “Desire As.”
The Cult
2/5
Less talented and less energetic guns and roses.
Traffic
1/5
Sounds like so much else from the late 60s and early 70s. Showcases the neutered energy that would make Steve Winwood the darling of easy listening and soft rock radio stations played in waiting rooms for the next forty years.
4/5
David Bowie
3/5
Kinda like most Bowie albums. Some killer songs and a lot that’s forgettable.
Kings of Leon
3/5
Undoubtedly better than their first album with some really enjoyable songs, but still a ton of droning, forgettable, same-sounding dreck.
Elvis Costello
4/5
I never really enjoyed any of the Elvis Costello I listened to in the past. Apparently, I needed to go further back in his catalogue bc I enjoyed this.
Elvis Costello & The Attractions
2/5
My Aim Is True pleasantly surprised me. This did not. Why does every critically acclaimed songwriter have to morph into these clown that make “rich tapestries of kaleidoscopic music?” It sounds like a boring circus no one wants to be at.
Malcolm McLaren
2/5
I get the importance, but screw this dude for taking all the credit.
Stevie Wonder
3/5
Bruce Springsteen
5/5
I am from New Jersey and grew up on this. My review should mean nothing to you.
Yeah Yeah Yeahs
5/5
Green Day
4/5
If it was just about what’s on the album, I’d give it a 5, but this album is the starting point that ended up with me hearing pop punk type sounds in modern country pop and that just makes me fucking sad.
The Chemical Brothers
3/5
Inoffensive, but endless repetition just isn’t my thing.
Can
2/5
Started out pretty cool. Could’ve been current 30-40 years after its release date. Then they got real fuckin weird with it. I decidedly do not like nearly 20 minute songs with assorted irritating sounds.
Ananda Shankar
3/5
The Pogues
3/5
The Jam
4/5
The Waterboys
2/5
ZZ Top
3/5
Well executed early 70s bluesy rock. Exactly what you’d expect and nothing special.
Ali Farka Touré
2/5
Almost remarkably banal.
Jeff Beck
3/5
I was wondering how I never knew that Jeff Beck sounded so much like Rod Stewart… Anyway, another blues heavy album by a bunch of English white dudes in the late 60s. Nothing remotely interesting here unless you’re really impressed by blues after the invention of a wah pedal.
Stereo MC's
3/5
Inoffensive most of the time. Lame raps. Not my thing.
Iron Maiden
5/5
Mudhoney
4/5
Youssou N'Dour
3/5
Led Zeppelin
4/5
Anita Baker
4/5
George Michael
2/5
The Undertones
3/5
This is a fine punkish album, but the fact I’ve already heard two albums by these guys and none by Descendants has me curious.
Bob Dylan
1/5
No. Fuck you, Bob. So sick of this bland music full of superfluous harmonica and clown vocals.
Bruce Springsteen
3/5
Machito
4/5
Beatles
4/5
Femi Kuti
4/5
Neil Young
2/5
The song “On the Beach” was good in spite of Neil’s vocals. The rest of the album isn’t interesting enough to get past that whiny warble.
808 State
3/5
Not the worst electronic music I’ve ever listened to, but suffers from being too long and too repetitive as most EDM does.
Johnny Cash
3/5
This album is tough to consider without its context, which tends to increase its stature in my mind. In the end, it’s an album of covers in which “Hurt” is really the only one which approaches/exceeds the original, although I do also like Cash’s “Personal Jesus.”
Peter Frampton
2/5
As live recordings go, this is pretty great sound quality. That being said, Frampton isn’t interesting enough to warrant over an hour of listening.
Nightmares On Wax
3/5
Extremely chill, but never really interesting.
Duran Duran
3/5
All style, no substance. Quintessential 80s.
Bebel Gilberto
3/5
Very smooth and a nice listen, but I don’t think there’s enough novelty about this that it should outrank albums from the heyday of this sound.
Lightning Bolt
3/5
I enjoyed this at times. Other times felt songs went on too long.
The Stooges
3/5
T. Rex
4/5
Big Brother & The Holding Company
3/5
Fake love album. A bunch of songs not much more than just fairly executed blues. More overrated 60s.
Randy Newman
2/5
Honestly didn’t have Randy Newman dropping the n-word on my bingo card. Unfortunately, there’s little else for me to comment on this album.
The Who
2/5
As a child, my boomer parents excitedly told me “Pinball Wizard” was from a rock opera one time when it came on the radio. I don’t recall them having much else to say, and having once again tried to glean what’s great about this album, I’d be at a loss to praise it further.
The story is boring. The thematic refrains aren’t interesting enough to warrant sitting through. This is literally the soundtrack to a movie no one gives a fuck about.
Captain Beefheart & His Magic Band
2/5
There’s so much crap here, but it has moments where it starts to coalesce into something worth listening to before degrading back to utter nonsense.
Prince
3/5
Found myself pretty bored through the first five or six songs, but then a few leaned in a different direction like I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man and I enjoyed those.
Buddy Holly & The Crickets
4/5
Never actually listened to a Buddy Holly album before. This was better than I expected.
Alice Cooper
3/5
An enjoyable listen with not much that stands out. No More Mr. Nice Guy is, of course, a classic for a reason.
Sparks
4/5
This caught me off guard. Never heard this band before and was pleasantly surprised, aside from Equator which went on too long and got super annoying.
The Shamen
4/5
Never got too repetitive. Nice in the background and found myself nodding along a lot.
Pulp
3/5
It has moments that are pretty good, but overall just doesn’t really land.
The Byrds
2/5
Nowhere near as insufferable as Sweetheart of the Rodeo, but also generally pretty bland. Congrats on using a phase effect, I suppose? I don’t know. Think I just don’t identify with the 60s mentality at all.
AC/DC
3/5
More historically significant than sonically interesting at this point, but not a bad listen at all. Just a bit samey.
Fred Neil
2/5
Like eating plain oatmeal and drinking dishwater.
Paul Weller
2/5
Someone reviewed this and said it sounds timeless bc it could’ve been made in the 70s. No…it sounds like the 70s, but 20 years later for some reason. Soulless tripe.
Nine Inch Nails
5/5
I don’t really like the way a lot of this album makes me feel, but that’s kind of the point of it, isn’t it? It’s fucking brilliant. It’s disgusting. It’s wistful. It’s violent. It’s lonely. It’s claustrophobic. It’s the thoughts that never fully reach the front of your brain no matter how hard you focus on them and the feelings that come on too strong and/or too fleeting for you to ever make sense of. Fuck this album. I love it.
Gary Numan
4/5
I did not expect to enjoy an entire album of sci-fi sounding music as much as I enjoyed this. Cars is the catchiest tune, but also arguably the least interesting. The impact this album had on new wave, electronic music, and later eras of rock is constantly evident.
Peter Gabriel
2/5
It’s not terrible, but most of this feels like he’s more interested in incorporating “new” sounds rather than making a song with any kind of feeling or fun.
The Doors
4/5
Would rate this higher if a quarter of the album wasn’t the last track.
The Sensational Alex Harvey Band
3/5
I don’t get what’s sensational here. Glad it was short.
Blondie
5/5
Never listened to the whole album despite knowing and enjoying a bunch of the songs. So much of this can be heard as influencing what would come for the next 4 decades.
Girls Against Boys
2/5
Aggressively monotonous. Like Sonic Youth or Pixies with all the interesting parts amputated. This could’ve easily been replaced by a better album from one of those bands. These songs are so fucking dull to have 5-6 minute runtimes.
Lupe Fiasco
2/5
There’s some catchy stuff here, but a lot of it is really nothing special and the 12 minute thank you track is horribly boring. Took away a star for that.
Johnny Cash
4/5
The sound quality is surprisingly good for a live album in a prison, but you can still hear where the mics can’t keep up at times. About as good a live album as I’ve heard.
Pulp
2/5
So fucking dull. Songs go on and on. Dude really loves the sound of his own voice.
PJ Harvey
3/5
Solid rock album. I like her voice, but there’s not much here that grabs me.
Pet Shop Boys
2/5
The singer’s voice only seems capable of being either saccharine or insipid. The music is completely dated and sounds at best like neutered Depeche Mode. The album starts with a very long, very boring song about not being boring and gets worse from there. If you told me this was the soundtrack to Early 90s: The Musical, you’d be believed. So lame.
Steve Winwood
1/5
The soundtrack to the dentist’s waiting room. Dated and boring.
John Martyn
2/5
Dull music. Uninspired sentiment. Had moments when it threatened to be interesting with something funky or jazzy, but the terrible singing and bog standard acoustic guitar kept it all well within the parameters of a typical boring folk slog.
Fatboy Slim
4/5
So much better than the other Fatboy Slim album I had to listen to. Much less of the same two lyrics repeated a thousand times in every song. An enjoyable listen.
The Beau Brummels
2/5
Well now I know what it would sound like if Bob Dylan could sing, but still put that stupid affect on his pronunciation.
Devendra Banhart
2/5
I just don’t know who likes this much folk music or what’s so special about this particular album.
Justice
4/5
Most of this album is just a plain good time. D.A.N.C.E. is super catchy. Nothing goes on repetitively for 8 or 9 minutes. Solid.
David Crosby
2/5
Horribly dull.
Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young
3/5
Had to listen to David Crosby solo yesterday and now this… There is way too much country/folk/psychedelia on this list. I’m so damn tired of it.
This has the songs you know and is mercifully short. Still hate Neil Young’s voice.
Motörhead
3/5
Ace of Spades is an amazing song, unfortunately the rest of the album sounds similar but never manages to match its energy so you end up feeling a bit let down by the rest. Jailbait is a pretty gross song where in not so many words they just can’t wait to fuck a child. I’m glad this type of “rock and roll bad boy” shit is no longer acceptable.
Joy Division
5/5
What could I possibly add?
The Boo Radleys
2/5
Its best moments are like second tier Pixies tracks. This album is easily 30 minutes too long. All the meandering, “let’s put all the styles together” tracks just blend into one long, second half slog where you really struggle to differentiate anything. I found myself occasionally checking in to make sure it didn’t sneakily end on me and I was now listening to some other band going on and on and on, but that wasn’t the case. What a chore to listen to.
Iron Butterfly
2/5
More freakin psychedelia. Great. The title track is all you need to listen to, and not even this self-indulgent 17 minute version of it. One song does not an album make, even if it is nearly half of the album’s total runtime. Lame.
The Divine Comedy
1/5
Not funny enough to be satire. Not good enough to be this far up its own ass. Whole thing feels like a theater geek’s wet dream of the album that will finally make regular people appreciate musicals. Worthless.
Public Image Ltd.
3/5
Theme is too long. Religion I isn’t strong enough to justify its inclusion given the presence of Religion II. The middle of the album is pretty good, although there is always the backdrop of Lydon’s “I’m being an asshole for the sake of being an asshole, but that’s my art” shtick, which like most pre-teen proclivities is occasionally clever, frequently cringeworthy, and nearly always tiresome.
The Electric Prunes
3/5
I’m generally burnt out on all the late 60s psychedelia this list churns out, but this was a bit of a pleasant surprise. It’s a bit more uptempo and has a darker/hard rock feel to it at times with less of the weird, baroque interjections common to the era.
The Soft Boys
3/5
Nothing really stood out. Was fine.
The Cardigans
3/5
There was some good stuff here. The cover of Iron Man was interesting. A lot was pretty forgettable. Lovefool is a great song.
Adele
2/5
Her ability to sing is undeniable. Her acting, less so. This is so polished and when you combine that with her feigned emotion you get an oddly inhuman album that is dripping with cloying sentiment. Also, I can’t figure out if her target audience is teenagers or geriatrics.
KISS
2/5
So boring. Kiss has to be the most overrated band ever.
Drive Like Jehu
5/5
Noise, aggression, and fun. Yes.
Red Hot Chili Peppers
3/5
Tracks 2-4 are undeniably good songs. Unfortunately the other 12 songs are a Red Hot Chili Peppers album.
John Lennon
3/5
I don’t know. Some of this is so fucking trite (Love) and then the next track (Well Well Well) offers nothing lyrically, but hints at something else with the screamed vocals and intense music. It’s fine, at worst. John Lennon was a dick and self-important, but definitely had some talent.
Stan Getz
5/5
I always think I need to be in the mood for a Stan Getz album. I’m an idiot. This is smooth, fun, tap along if you want to music and I love it.
MGMT
4/5
The highs of this album are excellent. Unfortunately, they only comprise about a third of the album. The rest is serviceable, but unremarkable.
Pet Shop Boys
3/5
This is dated trash with the least insightful lyrics I’ve ever heard. It’s like listening to a nine year old describe emotions and also what is literally happening in the room in front of them. Yet, it’s somehow better than Behaviour which Makes rated a two.
Supertramp
2/5
This is so 70s. Every song is bigger than it needs to be. There’s nothing outstanding except for the tracks where they chose to sing like a Monty Python character for no reason. No thanks.
Hüsker Dü
2/5
This should really be in my wheelhouse, but it just kinda sucks? I’ve long heard of this band and never gotten around to them and this was frankly disappointing. It sounds like I should give earlier albums a shot, but I am concerned their songwriting approach of sing the titular lyric 85,000 times as a chorus is an annoying running theme. This album is for people who want a more energetic REM who either has nothing to say or whatever they have to say is so washed out in the mix you’ll never figure it out. Descendents did better pop punk and Pixies did better alternative. Not sure why neither of those didn’t displace this album.
I have no idea who is hearing Barenaked Ladies in this, but considering it was mentioned as a positive in that review I’m assuming that person was born deaf with terminally shit taste anyway.
King Crimson
2/5
Opening track starts with an entirely superfluous three and a half minute intro before continuing on for another nine minutes of which only a few are interesting. Track three and we’re doing the long nothing intro again. Track four starts with nonsense words and then is interspersed with random cartoon sounds and voices. Track five—another long intro to a long song. Great, some trumpet that sounds like a sizable gnat flying past your ear and some violin that sounds like a mosquito. After four minutes, this turns into a decent, yet off kilter jam before the stupid trumpet comes back. Hey! We’re right into it on track six, but we’ve got another seven minutes to get through. Another song that isn’t interesting enough to justify its runtime.
Albums like this make me wonder if I’m just not smart enough to get it, or if the album’s existence as a recording is miraculous because the band should’ve never made it back from how far they disappeared up their own asses during the writing process.
SAULT
3/5
This is another album I feel is included more for the interesting narrative around the artist, rather than its actual sonic merits. There’s some adequate hip hop and lo-fi stuff happening here, but there’s a lot that barely even tries to get your attention.
Patti Smith
3/5
There were many precursors to punk, and this is certainly not the most important of them. Half these songs feel like Bob Dylan blues hell holes and the other half are grandiose leviathans of uncertain vision. Almost every song is way too long. Nothing is terrible here, but there’s also not a damn thing my life will suffer for to never hear again. Yes, yes, the first line is great and then you either can’t understand or don’t care to try for the next 40 or so minutes. A good line every now and then isn’t enough to make an album matter. Intent and cultural influence aren’t enough to make an album worth listening to.
Queen Latifah
2/5
I can’t remember her name for the life of me. If only several songs repeated it…
I’m not the greatest connoisseur of hip hop, but this felt particularly boring. The beats and her delivery are both so rudimentary that this ends up feeling like the listening equivalent of viewing a “paint by numbers” artwork.
Rush
4/5
Geddy’s voice is a net negative, but it’s not unlistenable. The album is pretty entertaining.
The Associates
2/5
Literally not a single song here is completely good. The stuff I enjoyed musically is ruined by overly melodramatic, spooky, Bowie-wannabe vocals. The rest is janky and boring 80s schlock.
Sonic Youth
4/5
Think I need to listen to it a few more times.
Queen
3/5
Sly & The Family Stone
3/5
Fleet Foxes
2/5
An indie record, as imagined by a top 40 listener. Hollow horseshit for those who could drown in a puddle while screaming about the unfathomable depth in which they are mired. Neutral Milk Hotel and The Decemberists both did this old-timey sound better and with a greater variety in the tunes.
Slint
4/5
Shuggie Otis
4/5
Don’t know that I will ever listen to the rerelease version that doubles the runtime, but I really enjoyed this. Mellow at times, funky at others. A good listen.
Joan Armatrading
3/5
Not sure any bluesy singer songwriter stuff is ever going to reinvent the wheel, but it’s better than the 87 Bob Dylan albums on this list.
R.E.M.
2/5
Listening to REM is like being offered a piece of cake as a little kid, except it turns out it’s carrot cake instead of the sweet chocolate or vanilla you imagined. It’s not terrible, maybe it’s even good, but all the adults keep going on about how delicious it is and you wonder if maybe you don’t taste the same things everyone else does.
Michael Jackson
2/5
There’s absolutely nothing musically important here. This is the point where his cultural impact began to outshine and outweigh his musical talent. I liked Man In the Mirror when I was a four year old, but it sucks now and goes on way too long.
Bob Dylan
1/5
I feel truly sorry for anyone who thinks this man is a poet of any renown. This is the best of the 7 or so Dylan albums I’ve suffered so far. It’s still awful. Fuck you, Bob.
Khaled
3/5
The first track set the standard so high, then this went on sounding like early 90s “adult contemporary” pop and never recovered.
Echo And The Bunnymen
4/5
The Who
2/5
The Who had some good songs. I’ve yet to see evidence of a good album.
Franz Ferdinand
5/5
This album came out right as I was about to turn 20. I loved it then, and I think it holds up well. I’ve gone and listened to Gang of Four as numerous reviews suggested, and yeah there’s a clear through line to this album, but it’s a bit reductive to say FF didn’t put their own spin and polish on it. To my ear, there’s a lot more variety to the songs on this album than on GoF’s “Entertainment!” and the whole notion of a later album being useless because someone kind of did the same thing 25 years earlier is silly. By that logic, we’d all be wasting our time but to listen to only the oldest known recorded music because everything after is derivative.
De La Soul
4/5
Eric Clapton
3/5
Mostly pretty standard blues. Nothing too interesting or too boring.
Astrud Gilberto
4/5
I’m typically not into relaxing music, but this stuff just hits me right.
Dexys Midnight Runners
3/5
It has decent moments, even times where you can hear where this was ahead of its time for a few genres. Unfortunately, there’s a lot of stuff that drags and in the case of Until I Believe in My Soul it drags for 7 freaking minutes.
Christine and the Queens
1/5
No idea what was remotely important to hear. Bog standard pop that doesn’t even have the good sense to be catchy. I keep waiting for a hook or something fun, but it’s just pop with all the stupid fun parts, that supposedly make pop worth listening to, sucked out of it.
Basement Jaxx
3/5
2/5
This was an indulgent chore to listen to.
Janis Joplin
3/5
Everyone sure did love some rollicking piano/organ during this time.
Bee Gees
1/5
This is astonishingly awful. So much of it is shameless Beatles rip-offs, then some folky stuff that sounds like it’s from a Christian-safe version of a Puff the Magic Dragon movie, and then some symphonic shit hits like a glass of cool water on a hot day—but you can’t be sure if it’s actually good or you’re just so fucking glad they’re not singing.
Lambchop
1/5
Utterly tedious.
Magazine
5/5
Yes! Never heard of this band before and I loved this!
Eminem
3/5
Even knowing it’s meant to be satirical, this feels super juvenile. I thought the same when it first came out, and I was only 14 then. The skill is there, and some hints at the stronger work to come, but this is just an okay album.
Stephen Stills
2/5
Miles Davis
5/5
ABBA
3/5
I don’t get why this is important.
Jah Wobble's Invaders Of The Heart
2/5
Long, boring, lame.
Ravi Shankar
4/5
I really appreciated the explainer at the beginning. I enjoyed this more than the other indian music on the list so far.
The improvisational nature unfortunately results in a lot of moments of songs where I was really getting into what they were doing, then it all would completely change.
Gillian Welch
1/5
I had two thoughts while listening to this:
1. Lullabies for the country fried.
2. Music for cousin fuckers that want to feel like there’s something artful about it.
The Beta Band
2/5
Incredibly dull.
XTC
2/5
This album feels like a joke I’m just not getting. Music is well-executed. Vocals are the 80s-est 80s that ever 80s-ed.
Garbage
4/5
David Ackles
2/5
Knockoff Sinatra sings sarcastically about Vietnam-era USA.
Miriam Makeba
3/5
Living Colour
4/5
Man, cult of personality is a tough listen in the US in 2025.
Suede
2/5
This was an album. What it did, I can’t really say because it’s run of the mill, droning britpop.
Metallica
2/5
The orchestra doesn’t fix what’s shit about Metallica. James is a terrible singer and he’s not improved by a live recording. This experiment is way more interesting in theory than reality and two hours of it is just too damn much.
AC/DC
3/5
It’s an AC/DC record. There’s some awesome songs, but even though almost all the songs sound the same, most of them are less interesting. The vocals grate after a whole album, as well.
The Jam
3/5
I finally get why people like The Jam.
Coldplay
4/5
I know this album gets criticized for being bland, inoffensive music, but it’s honestly so well executed there’s really no denying that it’s an excellent album.
Simon & Garfunkel
4/5
So many of the songs you know are on this album. The opening song was an pleasant surprise.
Spiritualized
2/5
Every song doesn’t need a three minute horn outro. Cop shoot cop made me wish a cop would shoot me. Bland shit.
Randy Newman
2/5
How in the fuck are there two Randy Newman albums on this list?
Nothing like listening to a dude who sounds drunk and thinks he’s witty play safe, old timey music.
The Thrills
1/5
No. No fucking way. This guy’s voice is absolutely neutered and the cutesy music doesn’t help. Transatlanticism came out the same year as this if you need an indie record with little boy vocals that doesn’t suck the beach boys dick so hard.
Siouxsie And The Banshees
3/5
Accidentally listened to this on shuffle, but I don’t think it affects my opinion of the album too much. I like this sound, but the whole album is too alike. There’s minimal changes in pace and tone, and I’m just not sure there’s enough happening here to call it a great album. It’s good, but not as a whole.
Suicide
2/5
I get how forward looking this was for its time, but it doesn’t really change the fact that it’s a pretty shit listen.
Madness
3/5
It’s a fairly decent ska album. The back half dropped off a bit.
New York Dolls
4/5
Grizzly Bear
2/5
I don’t get it. Who likes all this boring stuff that can’t even be bothered to try doing anything more than navel gazing? The mid-00s were full of this kind of stuff whether it be Iron & Wine, Sufjan Stevens, or this. It all drones on and on without ever arriving at a point. Maybe pointlessness is the point, but that just adds to the feeling that this is some self-important, pretentious bullshit.
Nina Simone
3/5
I honestly don’t like her voice most of the time. Sorry for the apparent sacrilege. This is the first I’ve listened to her and found myself often wondering if this material wasn’t written for her and therefore not doing her any favors. I dunno. I don’t like Billie Holliday much either. Maybe I’m just not into warbly jazz crooners.
Otherwise, the music is ok, if fairly standard for this era and about 75% of the album kept me engaged, so I definitely can understand its inclusion here, at least.
Echo And The Bunnymen
4/5
LL Cool J
2/5
Innuendo a 12 year old would find clever for 45 minutes, Mama Said Knock You Out, and the only pleasant surprise Cheesy Rat Blues where he drops the “I’m the shit” shtick to seem like an interesting artist with some depth for just a few minutes. Mr. Goodbar and Milky Cereal are the corniest songs I’ve ever listened to.
Mott The Hoople
3/5
It’s fine. Nothing really impressive, but it never sucks and if you end with the original album track list then it doesn’t overstay its welcome either. I’m choosing to believe Wish I Was Your Mother is meant to make fun of Bob Dylan with its similar drunken clown vocal cadence, stupid and contradictory lyrics, and superfluous harmonica.
Led Zeppelin
5/5
Radiohead
5/5
The only track that loses me a bit is Bulletproof…I Wish I Was. An absolute monument to the existential dread lurking within all the progress and convenience of modern society. It’s an album to feel absolutely awful to.
Simple Minds
2/5
The best thing I can say about this album as it wasn’t actually the four hours I thought it was when I first opened it in Apple Music.
Coldcut
2/5
Music for people who never grew out of the childhood phase where you walk around making random noises until the adults can no longer take it. I get how these techniques are applied to back a hip hop track, where typically the vocals are the meat and potatoes of the music, but when you use them just to back corny vocals that say nothing of value on songs like My Telephone they really are just a bunch of repetitive noises.
Sigur Rós
2/5
The vocals on this are infuriating 95% of the time, vacillating between a shit falsetto and a forced soft voice that reaches an absolutely enraging nadir on Hjartad Hamast where it sounds like this motherfucker is insipidly whining in your ear and you don’t know what it’s about or how a grown person can sound so pathetically infantile.
There is some beautiful music here, but every track lasting seven minutes means it’s interspersed with a lot that isn’t great to hear. The best stuff on this album sounds like it could be the music in a documentary about space exploration or technological progress, and I don’t really feel like I mean that in a complimentary manner despite it being the nicest thing I have to say about this album.
Arrested Development
3/5
This is overall a good album, but every song lasts a minute or two too long, which causes the album to last 20 minutes too long.
Fugazi
4/5
A band I always mean to give more time to.
The Libertines
3/5
Sinead O'Connor
2/5
Man, I hate to rate this so low because much of what’s she’s saying is very important and way ahead of its time, but so much of this album is just an absolute slog unless you’re reeeeeally into slow ballads.
Depeche Mode
4/5
Linkin Park
2/5
They felt like a label-assembled, cheap knock off when this album came out, and having listened to this for the first time in many years, my opinion hasn’t changed. My god, this is all so angsty, yet all the lyrics are incredibly vague—almost like what you’d get after focus group testing to catch the widest possible swath of disaffected, sweaty youth. The “raps” are completely devoid of flow or flavor to make sure every suburban, cargo-shorted, upside down visor wearing male between the ages of 8 and 24 can safely digest “urban” culture.
It might be a great album when you have more hormones than sense, but I’m middle aged and my ears work so fuck this shit.
The Teardrop Explodes
3/5
T. Rex
3/5
Not a very good active listen as most songs have one riff repeating start to finish, but there’s nothing super awful here. The whispery vocals get annoying at times.
Public Enemy
4/5
Electric Light Orchestra
3/5
Sometimes super fun and sometimes just too damn cheesy.
UB40
2/5
They’re good at what they do, but everything is so similar and goes on and on and on. I could probably listen to this whole album and enjoy it as background music is I was stoned and playing a chill video game or something, but this is an active listening chore.
The Adverts
4/5
The Psychedelic Furs
4/5
Louis Prima
4/5
Maxwell
2/5
William Orbit
2/5
The White Stripes
4/5
The Zutons
2/5
There’s nothing bad about this, but it has no ambition at all so that’s not really impressive.
Röyksopp
3/5
The KLF
2/5
This album was in 3 star territory until No More Tears. A 9 minute heavily reggae/ska influenced EDM song with a 2 line chorus repeated way too often in between a dude scatting/falsetto scatting? Some might call that hell.
The Smiths
4/5
Killing Joke
3/5
Dire Straits
4/5
Such clean guitar. Even if some of the songs are longer than I’d prefer, it’s never really boring.
Bonnie "Prince" Billy
2/5
The most boring person you know is feeling sad and made an album.
Pentangle
3/5
The Beach Boys
3/5
I actually liked this better than any other Beach Boys album I’ve previously listened to. Getting out of their cornball wheelhouse did them a real favor.
Blur
2/5
I honestly really like some Blur songs, but I don’t like most Blur songs. None of their albums are worth a listen as a whole, in my opinion.
A Tribe Called Quest
4/5
Bobby Womack
3/5
The Pogues
4/5
The xx
4/5
The Streets
4/5