Arc Of A Diver

Guy is such a sock sniffer. Holy fucking cheese. Stinky.

Really not my thing, middle of the road 80s pop

While You See a Chance sounds like a TV theme song and the production sounds like a Tim & Eric parody of 80s synth pop. Arc of a Diver is smooth in an 80s yuppie way. The lyrics are awkward and bad. Second-Hand Woman is either a too-late disco song or an early inspiration for Japanese City Pop. Slowdown Sundown has a nice mandolin part but the production makes this too corny to enjoy. Really sappy stuff here. It reminds me a bit of Baby, I Love Your Way by Peter Frampton. More Tim & Eric synth vibes on Night Train.

lo peor de ser hortera es no ser consciente de ello

jack antonoff, ets tú?

Un truño como un puño

Absolutely disliked this one by Whinewood. 80s music is just a hit or miss for me.

Why?

What does this album have in common with LZ IV? I find both totally annoying.

Limp soft rock that fails to make use of Winwood's voice or what appears to be second generation synths that the producer could not get enough of. But the real problem is there are not really any good songs on this record, including the big hit. Just straight up profoundly uninteresting.

Very poor. The 1980's worst bits in one album. Heavy synth and cheese with no irony.

chato pra caralho filho puta merda

Miserable, forgettable, an insult. So boring I kept forgetting it was on.

Album cover is beautiful. But it was so boring

Первый

All the classic rockers have their regrettable 80s album.

0.42

No one takes this shit seriously right...RIGHT??

The worst sounds of the 80s.

If it was possible to apply fabric conditioner - gratuitous quantities of it - to music, this would be the result.

The worst kind of 70s pop-slop from someone with shallow rock cred.

Every aspect of this album is cheap and forgettable. The synths sound like a child’s toy and the singing has that pseudo inspirational, I’m soaring with birds sound that puts me to sleep. I am usually pretty forgiving on music, but there doesn’t seem to be a silver lining for this one.

Snooze fest

Nix

too damn long and I don't like it

An album with a song called Second Hand Woman turns out as bad as I imagined. A lot of those guys from the 60s/early 70s tried to update themselves in the 80s. They got new haircuts, fashionable clothes and spent a load of money on the latest gear and made some awful unlistenable records. 1980 - Prince, Bowie and Kate Bush all put out albums out that year that could be on the list instead, and that's just off the top of my head.

I hadn't heard the term Yacht Rock before now, so this album has taught me at least one thing. Turns out, Yacht Rock is a slick, artificial, soft rock sounding disco turd, sliding slowly down the bow of a small sailing vessel. Some people really like this. Some don't. Hello.

Musical talent or not, it doesn't matter. This is the soundtrack to giving up on life. Zombie plod-rock

80s "plod-rock", LOL!

Couldn’t finish it. 1/5.

Like a weak Phil Collins album with no singles. Your local school wouldn’t even take keyboard synths this bad as a donation

I made a vow to listen to every minute of every album in this project, but this one put that vow to the test more than any I've gotten so far. Mercifully it was short--it was still 40 minutes of pain nonetheless.

We’d probably survive as a species if this album didn’t exist

Album 17/1001 Decided to listen while washing the dishes, and it somehow managed to make that task even less enjoyable than normal. 👎

meh

No, this didn't do it for me. Spanish Dancer was good, but the rest was not good. I respect that he's had a long old career, but this wasn't great. Nice cover though.

It's just bad

Et helt album med sange der lyder som opening credits musik fra 80er Sit-Coms

Oh my, I didn’t enjoy this album. Everything that was wrong about the 80s crammed into one album. I was prepared to hand out a generous two stars, but it just went on and on for what seemed like an eternity, with no redeeming qualities, and mase me angry, scared, frustrated and borderline suicidal. Utter crap!

I don't like this album. The keyboard sound is annoying and the songs are drippy. One exception: the song Arc of a Diver isn't half-bad. Not enough to get this past one star.

Old dad yacht rock. This should not be on the list.

Very 80s

Generic nothingness like this should not be on the list.

Not for me. 1/5

Stupid

I really like the album cover here, ahh wait I just perceived it correctly, I didn't know where the head was nevermind thatt. Well the genre is rock/pop so I think I'll like it, but since I don't know him, no high expectations. First song, it started slowly but it picked itself up well. I'm not disappointed, but it could be better. Production is good, voice is fine, progression of the song is fun too. It's soft rock if anything. Not a bad song, I just need better ones in the later of the album. Second song, this is worse, it's so 3 star album behavior of this song. Nothing worth to note is happening. Instrumentals are fine but also meh. Gibberishing now, fun but doesn't make the song drastically better. I get why it has pop in the genres now. Somehow these two songs are the most popular of the album, that's not good, it gets worse after this?? Bruuh. Third song, it's becoming a 2 star album at this point. It's kinda futuristic, but so boringly. He's bad at his own genre. There are some good parts, but overall it low-key sucks. Mm just disappointed rn. 4th song, I thought the beat drop after the intro would make it more upbeat or something, but it kept on going as in the start, eughh. This is a typical 80s bad pop album to be honest, it's too fake idek. Becoming a 1 star album already?? Dam, cuz the first though was a 3 star one, how did he come down so quickly. There was a switchup somewhere in the middle, which I thought would be permanent but nope, it went back to some crappy song again. Had to skip the last part lol, so dumb. 5th song, the sonical part is kinda nice, but the voice ruins it now. Ahh I'm gonna hold your hand when I say this Steve, you do not know anything about the beat or the beat Spanish dancers have. Wait, feel the street of a Spanish dancer? Either way I stand corrected. Skipped through this one too, and he literally sang everything in the same tone, became a permanent waver somehow. 6th song, the start is promising but idkk. I'm not satisfied at all, he sings the best here and still it's not even that good. It's just the delivery is more strong. I would never wanna listen to this again, it has no depth. Sonically it becomes good and then I realise, that makes a 7 minute song a 30 second enjoyful experience, BARELY. 7th song, gaaawd Steve what are you doing here now wtf. They deffo would use some of these songs in some bad movie about friends, that tried to be ironic about it, but.. aww friendship. Get a grip y'all. Thank god that finished. Ahemm.. I have Curtis Mayfield 2 stars some days ago, and his album was.. baad. But it had some funk in it, sonically somehow fun, just so mild, anyway, this album doesn't even have that. First song has 3 stars maybe, but God I can't give this album more than 1 star, I didn't expect much, but this is barely "any" expectation I could have had. I don't want any more of him here, and I'll avoid him, unless he has gems somewhere else(doubtful).

You know that gif of Mark Wahlberg doing the confused face in The Happening? That's my summary of this entire album. While You See A Chance has 58m plays of Spotify then it drops off. Likely from everyone that gave up on listening to this. Sure he had Valerie and Higher Love why listen to Winwood when you've got Pete Gabriel or Phil Collins.

Detta är vad vi i orten kallar för kontemporär kukmusik. en liten rolig synt, ändrar inte på din situation. Me when I'm in a mid vocals competition and my opponent is Steve Winwood -> (<:O) Me when I'm in a boring lyrics competition and my opponent is Steve Winwood -> (<:O) Me when I'm in a bad mixing competition and my opponent is Steve Winwood -> (<:O) Me when I'm in a shitty outro competition and my opponent is Steve Winwood -> (<:O)

Winwood has a voice , but it’s over processed, and gods is this record soaked in 80s synths. Boring songs too.

My teeth hurt from this and I'm not even entirely kidding. Turned down the volume twice now. Could be my grimacing, though, as this is pretty shit.

Could Winwood have used woodwind to make this shit more palatable? Probably not. Just an idea.

oof.

Can’t stand Steve Winwood!

This guy fucked a lot of 80s mom’s with his sweet soft rock styles.

This album changed the way I do my ratings. Previously I gave some credit for quality musicianship and recording even if it isn't a style of music that I personally like. I tried to give some measure of objectivity to this overall subjective experience. But this is just unlistenable. I can't even make it through a single song. There are a lot of early '80s albums that have the same cheesy, synthesizers and other elements. But they hold up well because they represent a moment in time and innovation. This is just a hacky version of that. Steve Winwood is a super talented musician with a strong history, but when he decided to attempt the "new" sound he completely missed the mark. At dust. It's like the Disneyfication of '80s music. At best It can be called a Peter Gabriel knockoff. But even Peter Gabriel was cheesy at this point in his career.

Boring 80s yacht rock. This can't really be in anyone's top 1001 albums, surely?

I’ve heard the lead-off single, “When You See a Chance.” Not a fan. The rest of the album is worse. I found it bland and his voice annoying.

Bland 80’s genesis style offering weak voice what’s to like?

In the world of cheesy music, this is a package of Kraft singles.

This is for boring people who think mayonnaise is spicy and Phil Collins is a little too hardcore.

Aside from the first track this album is objectively a piece of hot garbage. This is a long way from the Spencer Davis Group, Blind Faith and Traffic. There is no reason for this to be here at all.

Very dull

Ugh, not again. I grew up having to listen to this bad synth crap play endlessly on the radio in the 80's. I thought this soul-sucking rubbish was well behind me, but no, here I am having to suffer through this infernal dreck once again.

Horribly dated synths. Painful.

Man this was so cheesy and bad. Get it out of here.

Points to Steve for playing all the instruments himself, but this is absolutely not for me. The whole thing feels mediocre and soulless, and like the kind of thing only the yuppies were excited about when it was released. I guarantee you nobody is thinking about this album anymore (except when this project forces it on them) and I'd be shocked if it's sold a single copy in the past 35 years. If you want music from someone who could do it all, go listen to NIN or Prince or anyone else but this dude.

Tedious.

It’s like a cold and sterile version of a Van Morison album. Synth tones are boring and plastered everywhere. Like a lawyer blues band in a restaurant while you’re trying to eat. Yuck

Wow this was bad

Wow - this was much worse than I expected. Really hasn’t aged well. Everything just screams early 80s - production, instruments, etc. Yikes. Won’t be back to hear more, which is too bad because I know Winwood is a good musician.

Nope, I couldn't really listen to more than the first song or two. Not my thing.

The soundtrack to the dentist’s waiting room. Dated and boring.

An affront to the 1001 albums list that this was included. It couldn’t sound more 80s bland if it tried.

Bollocks

I'm sure this was groundbreaking at the time, but it's a worse version of huey lewis/peter gabriel/paul simon. Spanish dancer sounds like an SNL skit.

It was impressive to see that he was playing everything, but this did not improve how much I liked it, which was too little. It's generic and soulless, as if a big band of contractor musicians were playing it.

Listened 30 secs of each track….wish I hadn’t bothered.

I’m trying to get my 1001albums mojo back, but this 80s soft rock is really not helping. The list of things I’d prefer to listen to is almost infinitely long. Well, infinity minus however many albums The Police released.

That's one yacht/soft/dad rock album too much in this list. Seriously, there's tons of music (and genres) out there that are not on the list but let's stuff ourselves with dozens of borring yacht rock albums!

Please make me forget

Synth pan flute magic

Too synthy!

Reminds me of local radio, they would play crap like this presumably it was cheaper than playing something well known. Or they had terrible taste. Anyway, early 80s easy listening, hateful stuff 1.5*

Na ja

pretty meh and boring on this one. i'm not inspired by any of the tracks and I haven't heard any of them before. I might go with a 1 on this album, nothing redeeming here for me.

In a nutshell: sterile soft rock/synth pop. Look, Steve. I know you were trying to do something different in the 80’s but this was a clusterfuck to listen to. I couldn’t hear anything redeeming on this album. Overall: 1/10

One hit wonder, entirely forgettable.

Prog nonsense

Not good

Oooo I do like a bit of 80s cheese but apart from the big hit there's nothing here to interest anyone. I'm not sure what the Genre is here? 'Cheese'?

Just not my music

Typical drivel of its time!

Baws

Everything awful about 80’s music in one album.

1.4/5 -- listened 2x. just not great. glutton for punishment here, as it didn't get better.

Sometimes when lots of bad things come together, cheesy vocals, awful synths, dreadful arrangements, well... in this case it just ends up a pile of stinking dross. It's hard to single out what I hate about this most. The vocals sound like someone impersonating Phil Collins, who in turn is impersonating Peter Gabriel, badly. I worry about Mr Winwood's nasal passage, as it sounds totally blocked. Maybe he suffers from allergies? The synths are probably the worst, but are actually so very bad that they become "interesting". There's a cheap "farty" sound as if this is being played on a cheap Casio that came out of a Christmas Cracker. The lyrics are just appalling, hitting the "run out of words la la la um um um" level of dreadfulness. But nope, after listening to the whole sorry affair, it's the keyboards that grate the most I feel. The synth-sax squeals like a stuck pig and, although there's an argument that they complement the other awful sounds being emitted here, this is a horror that should have been left where it belongs, back in the early 1980s. Obligatory one star.

Wow, this makes me wanna die.

For a 1980 album this sounds like it invented the sound of 83/4/5 Everyone else was coming out of punk and new wave and into the cusp of pop. This seems to have been ahead of that. For good and ill. This is truly tedious though.

I'd never heard of Steve Winwood before, and I'm not sure his music does anything for me. The arrangements and use of synths sounded off to me, and none of the tracks were particularly memorable.

I found this really boring and uninspiring. Not sure of the appeal.

First listen Saved 1/7 Top track: Night Train

The 80s had both some of the best and some of the worst music ever released. This is an example of the latter.

Have I heard this album before? No Highlights: Rating: 3.2/10 Thought this was really boring 80s pop rock.

This was very bland, sounded like a lot of bad TV show themes with really corny synth and sax riffs. I had it on while working and it all merged into one, my phone has played one or two random tracks before I realised it had finished. As it was released in 1980 it was probably influential on the other 80s stuff that sounded like this, but I'm not sure that's better or worse. Not for me, can't imagine it's anyone's favourite, even if you like this music you'd probably prefer something that stands out a bit more.

Mais um folk sem relevância para mim.

Blahhhh

Hated it. It was god awful.

I don't normally do this, but I just can't today. This is literally so three-star and mid in every way that it actually became a one-star.

When trying to convince people that the 80's were not musically terrible, one might preface with "Look.. it's not all Duran Duran and Steve Winwood and Vanilla Ice" 1 case of not helping your case out of 5

I was going to attempt another listen, but F it. This guy's voice and music take me back to time I just met my future wife and had the unfortunate experience of having to drop her sister off at her boyfriend's apartment. This dude proceeded to play one of Winwood's albums, (yes vinyl album) over and over and over for like 3 hours straight while her berated his girlfriend, punched up walls and the wiped blood on my new WMU sweatshirt. All because she went to Spring Break in Florida without him or something like that. Now, every time I hear Winwood's voice or music, I want to punch Rick in the face. Over and over and over again. I can't believe she married that dick and I can't believe I made to the end of this album. All apologies to Winwood, but I avoid your music like I avoid Rick. As much as possible.

1. a chance - 0 2. arc of a diver - 0 3. zecond hand uuoman - 0 4. zundouun - 5. zpanizh dancer - 0 6. night train - 1 7. duzt - 0

I am embarrassed for this project that this album is listed. The albums that are just people banging trash cans together are better.

Was relieved when I turned it off

Moche. Je veux bien mettre "While you see a chance" de côté, c'est la meilleure et elle n'est quand même pas bonne. Le reste n'est qu'un grand ramassis de synthé daté et affreux et de production au rabais dans des compo sans grand intérêt chanté avec une voix au mieux quelconque, plus souvent énervante. Et "Second-Hand Woman"? Vraiment? Je passe.

Didn’t like “Valerie” or “The Finer Things”, his hits from his most popular solo album. I like this even less.

The Wish version of Phil Collins... Without a distinct/iconic voice and without interesting drum parts. The synth sounds are bad and cringy. Pop songs without any hooks, barely melodies and feeling uninspired. What the hell? Steve Winwood is a talented musician with an impressive career, but this album is just bad.

Really not my thing… i did not enjoy this

Boring 80s tripe

so... this is like some adult contemporary nightmare where Billy Joel and Phil Collins have merged into the same dude who happens to think he is Stevie Wonder. The cover pretty much tells you what you are getting into.

That’s was the longest 39 minutes and 51 seconds of my life.

First track was recognisable but the rest of the album was forgettable.

I'm not a Traffic fan so I know nothing of Winwood. Get huge Peter Gabriel vibes from the vocal. The production is so heavily what I perceive as what others incorrectly malign the entire decade of the 80s for (1st half anyway), this is going to have to work to overcome it. So far this feels a lot like something that is going to be impossible to get into outside of its time. I don't want to say it's not good, but... ah fuck, 3rd track in, it's not good. Oh god, it's a song about a Second Hand Woman. Amazing. You're worthless love unless you're a virgin or something. What I will say is from what I know of Traffic, this is quite a departure and doesn't necessarily reflect badly on them. The Peter Gabriel vibes continue to shine through oh so strongly, except for, crucially, in the writing. Maybe it's the booze but I did grow into this sufficiently to enjoy Spanish Dancer. Is that enough to avoid the 1 it was headed for, time will tell. Sadly Night Train was less Gabriel and far more Phil Collins, thus earned considerable enmity from me. That and being almost 8 bastard minutes long. This is exactly the sort of record future editions of this book should be phasing out, but no, they delete nearly everything they ever included since 2005 as if no newish music is important. Some of that stuff is 15 years old and older mate, it's nostalgia for today's kids. Won't somebody please think of the children.

I dislike this very much. It's not interesting and I find his vocals annoying. This is primo "secretary rock". Jettison this shit into outer space.

I man what? the complete opposite of "essential". Weak jazzy pop doesn't have the confidence to be out there like Jazz. Would call this easy listening, don't hate it but tempted to give it a 1 as so bland.

I am so fucking bored listening to this .........

Die kut 80s synthesizers kunnen me gestolen worden.

1.5

Sounds like Phil Collins but actually boring. Avoid if you don't like 80s cheese. Best song: Arc of a Diver (Good chorus, still feels like a demo from Phil) Worst song: Second-Hand Woman (Terrible execution and abysmal lyrics)

Soft Rock? This is cheesy synth heavy. I'm ashamed this made the list.

Ahh it's just really weak isn't it. Nothing seems to be expressed with conviction or passion on this album. It's dull and cheesy. It kind of reminds me of a very shit version of a Phil Collins album (I love Phil and find him cheesy in the best way possible) but this is without that extra spark. There's not really any dynamics in the songs either for me, a song doesn't build at all or drop. Also are we for real with a song called Second-Hand Woman??? GROSS

Fuck this dude.

Giving the lowest possible score here because he's got a ton of talent and chose to use it to make yacht rock, which pisses me off. Best track: none

wow that opening synth riff is CRINGE. Sets a cheesy 80's tone right away. Fuck synths.

It was worse than I expected, and my expectations were quite low. Even the best songs on the album are bad.

Nope

Dreadful. I skimmed though a couple of tracks, got as far as Second-Hand Woman, looked up the terrible misogynistic lyrics to check I wasn’t mishearing them and bailed. Bland 80s anti-music.

Dear god no.

Hold on. Is this list actually based on the book "1001 *Elevator Music Albums* You Must Hear Before You Die", edited by Robert Schmuck and Associates at the Cheesefest Corporation, Inc.? 1980 is just three years after the 1977 punk explosion. I can't imagine how many fans of truly vital music (or just simply decent one) must have rolled on to the floor with laughter while listening to this ridiculous stuff. I'm rolling right now as I'm writing these words. It' s nOt easy to whrite by the waY, butt its becuz of the unconttttrolabble fits of laughTer I'm Xperincin rite noW. Now that I've stopped laughing and regained my spirits, I can maybe admit I was unfair in my first assessment up here. *Elevator Music* might be too narrow as an umbrella genre to describe the sounds and performance on this record. This thing can also work for the phone, actually. As in "Your call is very important to us. Please hold the line". Yeah right... You know they actually don't give a rat's ass about you and your problems when they choose this sort of music and make you go through those long minutes of ordeal as you're waiting for someone--anyone--to pick up the line. Guess the only correct tag for this sort of thing is "Music For People Who Have Bad Taste". And for once, I'm ready to fight tooth and nail to prove that such a supposedly harsh assessment is actually nothing but objective here. Let's just be a little serious for one second. Number of albums left to review or just listen to: 854 Number of albums from the list I find relevant enough to be mandatory: 80 Albums from the list I *might* include in mine later on: 36 Albums from the list I will certainly *not* include in mine (many others are more important): 31 (including this one)

oof, that was some bullshit early-80s pop. Yay, Steve, you played all the instruments on this album and it still sucked.

Steve Winwood: "All right, everybody all tuned up and ready to roll?" Band: "You got it, boss. Let's rock." Steve Winwood: "Timmy, you got that synth set to 'Elegant Farts'?" Timmy: *forces saddest thumbs up of all time in Winwood's direction* Steve Winwood: "Perfect, Tim. Let's make magic! And a one, two, three..." Or at least, that's how I imagine it went down. Anyway, this is not for me. I did like the title track well enough. Otherwise it's a cloudy blur.

Without higher love what are we doing here

Urgh. Captures everything I hated about the '80s

Nej nej nej inte min grej, säkerhetsfilmsvibe första låtarna.... night train va väl lite nice men inte alls nice nog.

Just not at all my thing, didn't enjoy. Feels like this is what Simply Red was trying to be. 1/5

Boring

nope

No

not for me

This is dreadful.

chiant

too much synth. when you think of crap 80s.....this is the soundtrack to it.

Not my cup of tea

I struggled to get through this. It's so bland I fear I may have slipped into a coma. I have always claimed I can find good in any album though so... well, it's only seven tracks long. And another thing, 'chances' does not rhyme with 'answered'!

Just not my cup of tea. I got a couple of tracks in but ejected.

Pretty bog standard eighties synth music. Inoffensive. Bit shit.

not my type at all

Synth heavy. Great musician and writer. Songs sound so aged.