Fetch The Bolt Cutters

How ecclectic. Not my style unfortunately. I'm not entirely sure what makes it great but you can't win them all. i guess.

Well... lost my notes. TLDR I'm sure someone loves this, but it's not for me. Idk what I just experienced. Wow.

Hated it. Possibly the worst album so far.

This is performance art, not music. I feel I should be snapping my fingers and wearing a beret at someone’s open mike night. It’s like everyone has made this silent pact that she’s really bold and experimental without looking for the music. I couldn’t finish this pretentious garbage.

Fiona Apple bemoans that the Drumset is gone and asks why did you take it away on that eponymous song. Can whoever stole Fiona's drumset please give it back so we don't have to endure more low-fi improvised percussion from her? 1 out of 5 stars only for this.

An odd and uninteresting album.

Не люблю женский вокал.

Not my preference so far,

Meh. Just not my thing.

I knew with the Yoko Ono/Chuck Berry screaming at the end of the first song that I'd be in for a rough ride. It actually wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but I'll never listen to this again, therefore it's a 1.

This is not good. It sounds like someone has just discovered garage band and wants to show off some half baked ideas as songs. Should there be more women on this list? Yes. Should we accept any old junk as long as it’s done by a woman? No. .5 of a star.

There comes a time where they want to be an "artist". I'm ok with breaking free of form and going down another path, that's axiomatic. But when they decide to start with the jarring discordant stop start chord sequence singing like Ornette Coleman with lots of talking and strange noises clanking people singing for no good reason....I get the shits. Fiona is great, has had some fine moments. But not this.

Mmm nope. Not my cuppa'

This is quite unpleasant.

Terrible

Exasperating

Second FA album within one week. But the (vocal) extravagance on this is simply annoying. 1,5

Hated the way she ended all her songs

I was curious to listen to this because I remember there being so much buzz about Fiona Apple when the album was announced. This isn’t my style. Like, at all. Maybe I need to check out her earlier work, but her lyrics and the fact that it sounds more like she’s talking than singing really annoy me.

Unique voice. Unique songs.

this annoyed me so much

Seinfeld_No_Thanks.gif

More like Fiona Crapple

A load of rubbish.

Rubbish. Can I give it less than 1 star?

First song is weird, let's hope it gets better. Fiona Apple is regarded as one of the best singer song writers, so I owe it to her and to my love of singer-songwriter music to listen with open ears. Update: I really tried. I did. It's just too discordant for me. I like a better flow. I can see why people would like it, it's just not my cup o' tea.

A really underbaked and boring album. Repeating the same phrase with slightly varying 4/4 backing percussion gets very stale very fast, and the lyrics themselves feel incredibly one-note and shallow. Feels like a very low-effort album for one apparently so personal

dog shit

A lot of sensless sounds and whooptie-doo.

Way too weird. Very interesting voice. Songs are terrible.

Just not really my style. I liked Drumset, but most of the other songs on the album, i could take or leave

There are albums I love, albums I hate, but I don't think an album has annoyed me more than this one.

I don’t get it. I’d heard of fiona apple before. I’ve never heard a single song on this album. Nothing… I’m not sure now if I e ever heard a single song by Fiona Apple. And, I didn’t like any of it. I just don’t think I get what she’s after.

Pfffffttthahahahahaha, now I know y'all are f***ing with me. There's no way y'all put this album on this list and got people genuinely praising it. Hahahaha, that's comedy. This might've been good if she actually sang on a track, or at the very least stayed on beat, but neither of those things happen. For the entire album. People saying how this was the album during COVID, so what? Covid is over, bro. And the lockdowns weren't that severe that you had to be locked up listening to this weird shit. Bo Burnham's Inside came out around the same time and is a way more introspective and social commentary project about that time, the time before it, and what was to come after. This thing barely aged past the first week without feeling like a choppy throwaway project. The only good thing that will come out of this album is randomly playing Shameika in the car to startle my friends and get a good laugh. Other than that, this was not worth anyone's time and y'all should be ashamed of yourselves for trying to pass this off as anything other than noise.

Eh, not my bag

Ive never listened to her but everything ive seen before always says shes amazing so i have high expectations nvm i dont like it at all it was so hard to listen to. Far too repetitive and she was just talking really.

This poor lady is having a mental breakdown over shitty sounding contemporary jazz with……I’m not going to rag on her. She needs help.

She's clearly very talented. I have no interest in whatever is going on here, and disliked every second of it.

Strays into Yoko territory. Plus some Queen crap. No ta.

was anderes, für andere

Eine Liedermacherin welche für mich zuviel experimentiert

isses einfach nicht

Not…what I expected from her.

3/10

Firstly, she can’t sing. Or perhaps she just chooses not to sing as she’s too busy being angry and quirky. Painful listening. Making no connection with me.

Poor in every way, maybe except for her bank balance, I'd imagine. She's trying to be edgy and quirky (I had to steal that word from my friend) in the way only Americans can do. So it comes across as contrived drivel. Horrible.

why did you get into music

This is the musical equivalent of the “art” with the banana taped to the wall. A lot of notes about it being “experimental.” What was she experimenting with? How to sound worse than all of her older music? She’s barely even singing for most of this album. Just kinda drawn-out talking over some weird percussion that isn’t even good. No catchy melodies, no good vocals, and I couldn’t even pick out anybody playing good instrumentals behind her. Nothing special about any part of this. By far the worst thing I’ve been subjected to on this challenge. Why is this a must-listen? Especially considering how few albums we get on this list from the current decade. THIS is one of just three albums from 2020 on this list. There are so many more important artists and albums that could’ve been included but we get this tryhard bullshit instead.

I remember not liking this album when it came out and making sure to keep it to myself lest I get chewed up and spit out by the fanbase at the time. Happy to have a reason to give it another try. Common theme: Even if I enjoy a song, Fiona ends it with a 30 second freestyle interlude that I'm over by second 3. The first track was SO GOOD until she animorphed into a dolphin. I loved the piano runs in the second track but overall I disliked pretty every other aspect- like everything that isn't the piano, and sometimes even the piano. By the end I was happy it was over. The title track sounds cool at parts but corny. It reminds me of the poetry scene from An Extremely Goofy Movie. Once again I got tired of it by halfway through. I started to warm up to things a little bit more by Relay. Felt comfortable by Rack of His, but I realized it was more of a Stockholm Syndrome than actual enjoyment. Newspaper is industrial and vulnerable, but still not a song I feel like listening to more than once. The start of Ladies reminds me of Mung Daal from Chowder too much. At least got a chuckle out of that. Heavy Balloon was pretty solid and I actually loved Cosmonauts... right until the ending outro. For Her has one of the only outros that I liked. Also liked most of Drumset and On I Go. Not like, to ever pick up again, but at least in the moment. Life is like a lime, tart and tangy. 1/5

I read on the Wikipedia entry for this album that it was largely done in GarageBand. More like GarbageBand, amirite? I like Fiona's older stuff a lot, but this is just trash. 1/5

This is super weird & not at all my thing. 1/5

Absolutely hated this, how is it on this list. It's not edgy, it's pretentious

Meh

Kakvo je ovo užasno eksperimentalno smeće. Nisam mogla slušati ovo. 1/5, 1/10

1/10

Too much noise. 1/5

0:00 of play time that weren't annnoying

Not for me

Another rubbish music again... I really didn't need to listen it before I die, and I hope listen to it never more again.

.

Fiona Apple reinvents "rock" music by hitting two rocks together and calling it music

Incredible. Incredibly boring I mean.

Off-Beat, literally. I’ll admit this was the first album I’ve had where I had never heard of the artist before, and unfortunately I think I preferred when I lived in ignorance. The percussion was all over the place, the production was so poor it sounded like an essay that hadn’t been proof-read before submission. The lyrics described an erratic soul and someone I felt needed a hug, and probably therapy, rather than a recording contract. A few songs started well, for about 20 or so seconds I thought that perhaps this song would be good, and then it would go odd, and odd for odd’s sake. I think there’s a talented artist there somewhere, some of the lyrics were clever, her voice, when she actually bothered to sing, was good. With a decent producer and someone there to tell her to stay on-message she could release something listenable. Unfortunately I really struggled with this, it felt too much like the poetry of a 15 year old filled with angst, who doesn’t have the maturity yet to realise all-out cynicism won’t make you happy. In fact those 15 year olds may love this album. Sadly for me, it was a rare album I couldn’t even bring myself to listen to twice for reviewing purposes.

It was annoying

I hated this so much

Always liked her voice

If you're going to produce an album of this style, at least make the effort to do it well. To me this just sounds like an immature, middle-class teenager who thinks being angry with their parents is the ultimate revolutionary act. I had never heard of Fiona Apple before. I wish it had stayed that way. I'm not sure this album should even be included in the top 100 trillion albums of all time, let alone the best 1001. Utter puerile drivel.

Quirky voice and ok music but not really my thing.

I love her voice but I've never felt she could put together a full album of great tracks, more of a singles maker but that was 20 yrs prior to this release. I hated the intro track and her delivery, just rough and I didn't want to love her after hearing it. Then "Shameika" and it's redundancy and over the top instrumentation let me know this ain't the album for me. The percussion on "Relay" is distracting and manic. I can't connect with these quirky songs. She isn't showcasing her great voice at all, most of it was talking not singing. It has angry undertones and repetitiveness that make it unenjoyable for me. Fairly popular album based on the # of listens on Spotify. I skipped ahead on most of this. I just don't get what she's selling. I found none of it compelling, it sounded like the ravings of someone who's making music alone in their basement. "Ladies" was the one song I could tolerate, but again it's lined with rambling incoherent words and sounds. One star for trying but I hated it. Not 1001 worthy.

I hate this kind of music. Really a pain to listen to.

No

It's like you're sitting a hipster gastropub and the live local musician for the night is a spoken-word poet who tries, and fails, to do her best Regina Spektor impression The lack of rhythm, structure, and weird vocal inflections/performances here is absolutely exhausting. And it really feels like the singer is trying sooo hard to be "weird" and "out there", when really it's so try-hard that it's just annoying. Another analogy - it's the equivalent of being out in public somewhere and a bunch of shithead high-schoolers are being obnoxious by making "lol so random" loud noises and doing everything they can to disrupt anyone around them, simply to gain any degree attention at all. When really their attention-seeking antics, and this album itself, isn't funny or interesting; it's just trying so hard that it's cringe.

Couldn’t make it through a single track and gave up on the album 3/4s of the way through. I felt like I had wandered into a coffee house on poetry night and all the performances were really BAD.

Haar jaren negentig-album was al niet veel soeps, maar dit is pure aanstellerij. Lelijk gebrul, lelijk gezingzeg, lelijk gelal. Weer zo'n wijsneuzerige plaat waarbij je af en toe kijkt of het al afgelopen is, om vervolgens te verzuchten dat je nog maar net over de helft bent. Waar is Fransie als je hem nodig hebt?

Chaotic To summarise - random dolphin like squealing, dogs barking, heavy breathing. Piano keys being smashed around and what sounds like a kitchen drawer being rattled You can hear the lockdown insanity in real time as the album went on Felt like fetching the bolt cutters to chop my ears off and end the suffering 1 ⭐️

Meh

Made it to the beginning of track 3 after being tempted to switch off half way through track 2. It was truly awful.

I really wonder why anyone could throw 5 stars. I really wonder why the critcs can talk this way about this album. How much was the money they got ??? Clear 1 star, because 0 is no possible option.

No. Sorry, gonna pass on this one. Don’t need every Beatles or Deep Purple album on this list, nor do we need a late era album from someone who’s run out of real ideas. How about “Exile In Guyville” by Liz Phair instead?

Nah

Not my style

Sounds like a mental health crisis. There isn't a single part of this album I enjoyed or considered worthy of being released ,no less making it a “must listen”.

God damm that's a strange bird

This album made no sense to me, and quite frankly I am flabbergasted that it's included on this list. It's a 100% miss for me.

To say I find this disappointing would be an understatement. Fiona Apple has long been recommended as somebody who aligns to my musical interests, but I never really explored her until now because I'm just naturally skeptical of pop music. Well...this album makes my delay feel justified. It doesn't fall short where pop typically does fall short for me though--it's definitely not formulaic or written specifically to boost a studio. I give credit for experimentation, but almost all of it misses the mark for me. Can't really grade on anything else besides that. For Her...my word man, what an unlistenable song. I'm sure it got a ton of plaudits for its message coming out at the point in time in which it did, but compositionally and production-wise, it might be the most cacophonous song I've ever heard.

Not for me

Oh this was so bad, just horrible. Talentless woman shouting and speaking crap with random noises in the background. Absolutely hated every minute of it. Also, it was far too long and could easily have been 51 and a bit minutes shorter without losing anything of musical value.

Niet mijn ding, instrumenten klinken willekeurig door elkaar.

Okay, i can´t take this....

Ja hier zaten we op te wachten zeg. Eén keer Fiona Apple was blijkbaar niet genoeg. Dochter van een acteur en zangeres, opgegroeid op privéscholen en later thuisonderwijs. Ja dan krijg je dit. "Apple was classically trained on piano as a child, and began composing her own pieces by the age of eight". Als je normale ouders hebt wordt gezegd dat je als kind al vaak aan de piano zat te kloten. Als je uit zo'n gezin komt waar beide ouders overleven op aandacht was je op die leeftijd aan het "componeren". Na 3 minuut 40 begint ze te letterlijk hinniken en ben ik er eigenlijk alweer klaar mee. Ik trek dit heel slecht. Fiona is mijn Joni Mitchell. Ik denk dat ik de muziek zelf voor 85% nog wel trek, maar het is dat gebrabbel en het kattengejank waar ik vrij snel al enorm boos van word. Dat iets kut klinkt maakt niet dat het kunstzinnig is. Dit is muziek voor vrouwen die naar een retraite gaan en dan in groepsverband aan van die vaginale stoombaden doen.

This might be the most loathsome album I've ever listen to. Not because of Fiona Apple. Yes, she's a bombastic weirdo who thinks vocals should be depressing & devoid of melody. And yes, she thinks an offbeat bass drum & randomly smacking a snare drum with a brush stick makes highbrow music. Who cares? Whatever floats her boat. I loathe anybody who *pretends* that this bollocks is somehow profound songwriting. Fuck. Right. Off. It seems that critics love this album, which isn't surprising. Personally, I don't feel critics gravitate to art with universal appeal or familiar brilliance; they seek art that allows them to flex their critical prowess. Art that allows them to utilise their catalogue of empty platitudes; to introduce their unquantifiable measures of greatness; to flout their superior intellect, making us common dullards gasp at their scholarly perspectives. Blowhard cunts. Non-critic "fans" of this shit probably enjoy open mic poetry readings. They probably wear turtlenecks and fucking berets. They're probably freshman arts students who will wax lyrical that Abstract Expressionism has some deep meaning, rather than it being any old shit slapped on a canvas. Insufferable turds. Listen to the long, boring way that Fiona Apple sings "Yoooooouuuuuu" in "I Want You to Love Me" and tell me it doesn't give you a greater appreciation for singers who can creatively hold a note. Listen to the final 20 seconds of this same song and tell me producing that fucking noise & recording it for others to hear is somehow commendable. Listen to the track "Relay" and tell me it isn't the most annoying racket you've ever dumped inside your earholes. Listen to the lyrics in "Heavy Balloon" and tell me there's a hidden message in this ridiculous word salad. Garbage. This album was released during the COVID pandemic, while most of the world was in lockdown. My guess is that many self-aggrandizing arseholes clung to "Fetch the Bolt Cutters" because it served their narcissistic needs. It's the kind of obscure, dreary album that generates groupthink amongst their cliques. The perfect album for a critical circle jerk. I bet those who praises this album also exclude any tracks on it from their Spotify playlists. And I don't blame them. "Fetch the Bolt Cutters" is a tedious slog. 👎👎

Don’t like this

I don't like Fiona Anna. Maybe her face reminds me too much of a friend I don't like either. So I was certainly biased. Nevertheless, I tried to listen to the album. I think the first track was not too bad. After the chanting in an unpleasant voice got on my nerves more and more in the second track, I only gave the other tracks a quick listen. There was nothing more that I liked.

furchtbar

Newspaper was very cringey - not enjoyable listening for me. Also “I Want You To Love Me”. And…. the whole album. Nevermind. It’s the whole album. Some songs were actually fine. But I still wouldn’t put them on over much else. That being said, I don’t regret listening to the album, because now I know that I shouldn’t ever listen to Fiona Apple again, and can happily judge others for doing so.

Weird. But it’s unique. Not my type of music. Lyrical and poetic for artsy women in NY.

I hate this.

Just no...i don't know what I just listens to but ist wasn't good

the most overhyped and overrated record of the decade in the history of the universe

Shit pile of an album

This was just unpleasant noise.

This is fucking shit. Cut away 80% of the content and you'll have a solid 2/5 EP because there are some ideas that work.

Not for me. Her first two albums, however, very much are.

I've never listened to Fiona Apple before and after listening to this album I don't think I'll be listening to her again.

0/5 my co-workers told me to put in headphones

The dogs randomly barking in the background were arguably the best part.

Not great album

Ew

she's shit isn't she. i think she's a safe bet to put on my list for potential wrong uns.

Also not as good as Blue. RIP Chris Bart-Williams

Awful stuff. Clearly I’m not enlightened enough to appreciate musical experimentation

I'd give this a 0 if I could

1/5 Best: Ladies Worst: On I Go

Not a fan

I knew I was in for quirky when I saw the album cover, and I was not wrong. Fun to hear something contemporary, but I personally think there are loads of new albums that are better than this by miles. It gets plus points for trying to do something different - so tired of hearing rock at this point. Unfortunately it doesn't do anything for me at all, which is unfortunate because I WANT to enjoy it. I think I can single out 1 or 2 tracks that I could give a chance again, but other than that it's an album that I'll definitely remember, but not return to.

So excited to give this album a one. People think this is creative because they made indie girl music with beats, and had their dogs bark in the background. This album is coffee shop background noise. No thanks!

Not a big fan of this. But the lyrics are kind of interesting to listen to.

Wow so creative!

I like Fiona Apple but not a fan of this album

Smettila di fare versi te ne prego. Da strano poi diventa irrilevante, pff

nooooope

Sorry, my first 1 rating. Too experimental for me.

Not too sure why people love Fiona Apple so much. I listened to this album when it came out because people were so excited about it and did not care for it. I listened to again because of this list and do not find it enjoyable again. The experimental drums was a miss. The singing wasn’t great sounding. All in all I did not enjoy it. 2.5/10

nothing really clicked on it for me

Did not enjoy.

Didn't work for me.

This sucked ass. Never would've thought I would've heard Yoko Ono levels of shrieking on a track but here we are. Also barely any singing, just spoken word. This album is the personification of the weird horse girl everyone had in school. 3/10.

Don’t get it

Im sorry but it’s boring

Song #1 ending, WTF?? Song #2 - Shameika doesn't know shit Song #4 where she's saying, I won't shut up. Please reconsider. Heard the name as was curious. A few songs in and I was no longer curious or interested. Pass for me. 1 because it was music

I DO NOT LIKE IT. I'm sorry but it's definitivno NOT for me. I really tried, but it was really heard to tolerate, like really really bad...

Not my kind of music

nada de especial, muito experimental

Oh no. This is like listening to a Yoko Ono album. Terrible lyrics, maddening transitions, painful vocal noise. Sounds like near the rock bottom drug spiral album or maybe like the midlife crisis album. Or maybe this was an album intended to stick it to a bad contract with a record label. If I could sum it up with one word: alarming.

Talking music is not for me. Sorry

COVID-19 pandemic just hyped this album. 1/5 for me.

Don't fetch them.

I couldn’t listen to more than a couple of tracks. Fiona Apple has a great voice but the constant singing out of tune really grated on me. Definitely not going on my favourites list!

Didn’t hurt my ears but I can’t say I enjoyed it so only 1*

Never really gave her a chance... now I did

Ikke for meg