They Were Wrong, So We Drowned
LiarsNot in my edition of the book! 2004. 1 star. Pretentious, irritating, pointless noise. WTF is this shit doing this list, and who selected it?
Not in my edition of the book! 2004. 1 star. Pretentious, irritating, pointless noise. WTF is this shit doing this list, and who selected it?
Not in my edition of the book. 1 star. (C)Rap. Angry black man rants about motherf**kers, killing people, taking drugs, and refers to woman as "sluts with a nice butt to get a nut"... and then on his biggest hit asks "come on and give me a hug". Tedious, misogynistic, macho posturing rubbish. "Your mami, your papi, that bitch you chasin'/Your little dirty ass kids, I'll fucking erase 'em"
Not in my edition of the book so! Obviously not essential to listen to before you die! 2012. 1 star. Purile, sexist, misogynistic, obnoxious shite that gets boring reallll fast. Strange that it's OK for black rappers to use the N* word but if anyone else does you're racist. Or that it's OK for them to call women bitches and pussy and hoes (whores), but if anyone else does you're misogynistic. Or that it's OK from them to to boast about how high and doped they get, but if anyone else does then you're just a fucked up junkie. Just saying. "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower/So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". FFS, grow up.
p688. 1992. 3 stars Middle of the road songs offset by terrific voice and production. There simply aren't enough standout songs - after a while they tend to just blur in to each other. Not sure it is essential listening.
p412. 1978. 1 star. Soulless, spandex-clad, big haired cock rock. Lots of sheen and not a shred of emotion. Yes, you can play the guitar fast, but if you don't put any passion into it then it turns into pomp rock wankage realllll fast. Jeff Beck gets more feeling in 3 minutes than this lot have managed in a career.
1977, p377, 2021-01-04: Spotify. Excellent blues album, single LP
2021-01-05, p933. Spotify OK US indie guitar rock, vaguely 60s vibe
p717, 1993. Rap :( Well done of its type but not my thing at all
p426, 1979. 3 stars. 1970s smooth pop-jazz, plus Randy Crawford. The background music for Studio 54, silky strings, horns and electric piano. Title track is a classic. Good stuff, well done, but not my thing.
p950. 2022-01-10. 2017. Steely Dan-ish jazz/rock crossed with modern R&B+rap, but without any memorable tunes. Good production, technically good, pleasant enough but a bit soulless. Nothing that sticks in the mind. Not my thing.
2022-01-11. Not in the book! Indie guitar rock meets punk. Great riffs. I approve :)
2022-01-12 p628 1990 So-so garage/indie/heavy rock, nothing special 2 stars
p788, 1996, 5 stars Nick Cave :) all the favourites: Stagger Lee, Henry Lee, Curse of Milhaven, O'Malley's Bar
p218. 1970. 2022-01-14. 3 stars Early 70s samba jazz rock and ace guitar, vague Doors-ish echoes. Slightly bland. Cool background summer music :)
p820. 1997. 5 stars. Terrific mix of 60s psychedelia, Pink Floyd, Stones, Beatles, Julian Cope, 90s Brit Pop. This is GOOD.
p717, 1993. 4 stars. Bass driven indie rock with great riffs and sardonic delivery. Excellent :)
p27, 1956. 3 stars Light listening, "jumping jive", good fun. Have to be in the right mood for it though. You can see where Paolo Nutini stole from.
p434, 1979, 3 stars Classic dance album, fabulous production. Play and recreate nightclubs in 1978-79. Suffers from the "extended dance version" syndrome. Still sounds good, have to be in the right mood it though :)
p226, 1971. 2 star Prog rock hence excessive musical wankage :( Jon Anderson, can't stand his voice :(( Dodgy lyrics. Shame as the rest of it is good, especially Steve Howe's guitar work. 2 stars for production, and guitar work in general, especially on Clap.
p385, 1977. 5 stars. Prime Bowie, Brian Eno production. Not a weak track on it. Excellent.
p584, 1987. 5 stars. 2022-01-25 1980s electro soul. Great voice, catchy hooks, great songs. Production a bit dated - cheesy synths - but still excellent and still sounds great today. I'd forgotten what a great album this is.
p294, 1973. 2 stars Was prepared to dislike this as I tended to lump Genesis in with the entire prog rock-wank era but... parts of this are OK. Always liked Peter Gabriel's solo stuff, and his voice is spot on. Steve Hackett and Phil Collins also on form. Set against this, all the usual early 1970s complaints... dodgy lyrics, overly long instrumental "fiddly" bits - look how fast I can play! Listen to my fabulous, sterile instrumental "improvisation"! See how long I can go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and ON - and dig my groovy 70's synths maaaaaan. But it's got something, despite all that. I wouldn't go out of my way to listen to it, but I don't hate it either.
p381, 1977. 3 stars Proto punk, surprisingly OK, not as raw as The Clash or Sex Pistols but suitably angry. Decent songs and playing. As with a lot of punk, you have to be in the right mood for it, and if you are then this is above average.
p441. 1979. 3 stars. It was cool (probably still is) to bash Fleetwood Mac because of the success of Rumours and for being part of the entire late 70s FM radio/MOR/AOR/West Coast hate vibe that come from punk and new Wave. I get that - it was a reaction of two different musical cultures - but does that make this a bad album? The short answer is NO. It's actually pretty good. This is the Fleetwood Mac equivalent of the Beatles White album - a weird mix of well crafted pop songs, half thought out ideas that don't really cut it (The Ledge, Save Me A Place), fabulous harmonies and over-production. People were expecting Rumours part 2 and this ain't it. Christine McVie is the star of the show - voice of an angel, breathtaking love songs with instantly memorable melodies. The hits are there - Over and Over, Sara, Tusk - and standout tracks like Never Make Me Cry and Beautiful Child. Mick Fleetwood, John McVie and Lindsey Buckingham are all on form, and there is no excessive wankage on the solos. Set against it - can't help thinking it needed someone to slap Lindsey Buckingham with a wet kipper and tell him, "this track ain't good enough." Too many of his songs like That's All For Everyone and Not That Funny feel self indulgent. He does sound like he's trying too hard. And it's missing a sense of excitement - too many tracks meander and outstay their welcome (Brown Eyes, Sara, What Makes You Think You're The One, Storms), so they're almost background noise. The shiny production and smoothness of the sound is going to turn off a lot of the rockers and punks regardless. With a bit of judicious editing this could have been a great single album but as a double - too much filler, and so 3 stars.
p546, 1986. 3.5 stars, not strong enough for 4. Wasn't expecting to like this as much as I did. Rap meets heavy rock riffs, bass and guitar. THE sound of twenty year old American white boys in the mid 80s, taking the piss of out everyone and themselves. Having said that... points deducted for Girls, which is just cheese - compare that with the next track, which is Fight For Your Right - and it is all a bit shouty and "samey".
p436. 1979. 3 stars. Strange mix of punk and garage rock and reggae and ska. Vague Springsteen undertones, which isn't a bad thing. Excellent production values. However... don't like Joe Strummer's voice, and other than title track, nothing stands out. Goes for on far too long - it's rare for a double album to actually hold up without spotting the filler, and this fails the test. Saggy in the middle. Can see why this was influential in the punk era - far more sophisticated that most of the offerings of the time - but it hasn't aged well. Would have made an excellent single album. Glad I've listened to it but just doesn't do it for me.
p894. 2003. 3 stars. Came cold to this one, didn't know anything about the band or the album. Well done garage rock, great voice, but nothing here that hasn't been been done before (and better) by Siouxsie, PJ Harvey, Garbage or Elastica. It's good, and I'd listen to it again, but not sure why it's on the list as it's neither innovative or anything special.
p531. 1985. 3 stars Prime example of 80s stadium synth pop, even down to the audience whooping it up on the end of Broken. No doubt that they could knock out a good tune - some of these tracks are instantly recognisable - and the album has excellent production and musicianship. Lots of synths, sax and big guitars, and as a consequence it does sound a bit dated. Most of the tracks meander and outstay their welcome. Whilst it's well done, I always found them a bit soulless. 3 stars just because of personal preference.
p325. 1974. 2 stars Straight up I have to say I have always hated Roger Hodgson's voice. Every time he opens his mouth I just want to punch him to make him shut it. It's like chalk being drawn down a board. I also don't like electric piano, which is a major part of the band sound. And somehow the cheesy sax makes things 10 times worse. So, this album starts at a major disadvantage. Shame really as musically its OK, tight clean production, but suffers badly from prog-rock wank solo pretentions. And as usual with mid 70s albums, a lot of the songs outstay their welcome. Well done of its kind, and some good tunes, but that voice and tinkly piano... ffs. 2 stars.
p159, 1969. 4.5 stars. All the best bits of Buffalo Springfield, The Byrds and The Hollies in a strange mix of folk, country, rock and jazz. Gorgeous harmonies and songs. Excellent and understated guitar work from Stills. Unfairly dismissed in recent years because of the retrospective view of late 60's/early 70s long hair rock and by the punk ethos, "never trust a hippy". This is the direct ancestor of all of the West Coast soft rock albums of the 1970s. Half a star deducted for those songs that haven't dated well, Marrakesh Express being the prime suspect. On the whole this album still holds up well 50 years on.
p540. 1985. 1 star Dull indy rock that thinks noise+feedback = edgy+important. Would have helped if the singer didn't sound doped. Nearly every track sounds the same. Listened to the entire album and nothing stuck or left an impression. This is just noise. Move on, nothing to see (or hear) here. Not sure why this is on the "must hear" list, as there is nothing new or innovative here - the Velvet Underground did this kind of thing better 20 years earlier.
p52. 1960. 3 stars. Nice ;) Wasn't expecting to like this as much as I did. Smooth as Jim Beam bourbon. Direct connection to Booker T and Georgie Fame. Tight guitar work and smooth sax. Tends to stray into background music though. Not a jazz fan, so not sure I'd play it often. Incidentally, I once owned an album called "The Swinging Organ of Jimmy Smith". Sadly missed opportunity for the album cover.
p487, 1982. 2 stars I know he's a great wordsmith, but lyrically this is just depressing and bloody miserable to listen to. Very few standout tunes either. And something about Elvis Costello's voice leaves me cold, its either a whine or a sneer or a whiney sneer. Well done but definitely not my thing. Not likely to listen to this again. And will avoid sharp objects, pills and alcohol if I do.
p853, 1999. 1 star I like Sigur RĂłs , but this one... meh. Left me cold. Strays dangerously close into pretentious, over-long prog-rock wankage. Not sure why this one is on the list, as Valtari is a far better album.
p301, 1973. 2 stars. Early hipster jazz-rock. Look how well we can play our instruments! Look how fast we can go! Look how precise we are! Look at the polish and sheen and shiny chrome! All at the expense of any emotion or feeling. It doesn't help that Donald Fagin sounds stoned on every track. And it has an electric piano ffs. The entire album sounds like something you'd hear in the lift or restaurant in an expensive hotel. Technically excellent, but zero heart or soul. 2 stars for some sharp lyrics and for the guitar work, even if that does stray into 70's "look how fast I can play" wankage a lot of the time. Thank god for punk.
p400, 1978. 2 stars. Not my thing, but pleasant enough of its type. Nice voice, nothing exceptional though, and a lot of the arrangements are very 70s and haven't aged well. This album needs a warm sunny day to bring the best out of it, and we tend not to get them in Stoke. Not sure why this is on the list, definitely not essential.
p377, 1977. 3.5 stars New wave/pub rock classic. A little bit dated, but still holds up well, with some absolute bangers - Hanging Around, Peaches, Get A Grip, Go Buddy Go, Peaches - with the last two making up possibly the greatest double A side ever. On the downside, some surprisingly out of place guitar wankage (Princess of the Streets, Down In The Sewer), Not strong enough for a 4, hence 3 stars.
p592, 1988. 2.5 stars, not a 2 but definitely not strong enough for a 3. Suspect this is highly rated by people who were there at the time and are re-listening with psychedelic tinted headphones. For the rest of us... nothing to like or dislike. There are better Happy Mondays albums.
p686, 1992. 3.5 stars, leaning towards 4. Came to this absolutely cold. Don't usually like rap or hiphop but this was surprisingly good. Excellent production and accessible. Would happily listen to this again.
p83, 1965. 3.5 stars. The sound of an above average 60s beat combo :) It's a 50/50 split of filler and genuine classics. Interesting to listen to from a historical perspective - you can hear the genesis of The Who's later sound, and Pete Townshend's song writing is at least on par with anything Lennon/McCartney, Jagger/Richards or Ray Davies did at the same time, but not sure it needs repeated listens.
p152, 1968. 5 stars Classic Brit blues rock. Beck and Stewart on absolutely top form - the interplay between guitar and vocals is fantastic. Most of the tracks are stone cold classics - they even manage to cover Ol' Man River and get away with it. A couple of weak tracks - Shape of Things doesn't add anything to the original other than Beck's guitar work, and Blues Deluxe outstays its welcome, complete with the overdubbed "live" audience applause - but they are still worth listening to just for Jeff Beck. This still sounds great nearly 50 years on.
p750. 1994. 1 star So-so drum and bass with synths and samples. Probably brilliant for clubs at the time but not my thing at all. Just goes on and on and on...
p163. 1969. 4 stars Classic late 60s 'merican blues-tinged rock. The sound is dated, but you can't argue with the song writing, one of THE great rock voices, the energy, or the simplicity of great music stripped down to bare metal. 4 bangers on the album: Green River, Bad Moon Rising, Lodi, Commotion. 1 star deducted for dated production and filler (Broken Spoke Shuffle, Glory Be). This album is a lesson for all the prog rockers: if you can't say it in a 4 minute song, don't bother saying anything.
p823. 1998. 4 stars Came cold to this, knew nothing about the band or their music. Pleasantly surprised. Vaguely pretentious hybrid of punk and glam rock with ridiculous song titles, but doesn't take itself too seriously. All sorts of echoes in here - Ramones, The Who, Queen, Oasis. I liked this more than I was expecting to :)
p268. 1972. 3.5 stars He knows how to write a tune for sure - there are absolute classics here (You Are the Sunshine of My Life, Superstition, I Believe). Having said that, points deducted for some songs outstaying their welcome (Maybe Your Baby) and it does drift to "easy listening" mode far too easily. Probably on the list for historical reasons as it's generally recognised as the first of his "classic" albums. It's OK, with some real highlights, but there are better Stevie Wonder albums.
p681. 1992. 1 star Well, the cheesy synths and arrangements haven't aged well on a lot of the tracks. Nothing much to like here. This was the first album on the list that I struggled to listen to all the way through. Not my thing at all.
p136. 1968. 3.5 stars Lyrically light years ahead of the competition. Stripped down, sparse sound that still sounds fresh. Overwhelming sense of melancholy though, and if you're not prepared to listen to the lyrics a lot of the tracks can sound the same. You have to be in the right mood to fully appreciate this, and if you're not it can sound like self pitying meandering.
p483. 1981. 2 stars We all know their great run of singles in the 70s, but I'd never actually listened to an ABBA album all the way through. First time for everything. Pros: They know how to write a hook. Fabulous voices and arrangements. Excellent production. Cons: schizophrenic style - can't make its mind up whether it wants to be 80s electro pop (The Visitors, One of Us, Slipping Through My Fingers) or show tunes (Head Over Heels, I Let The Music Speak), which is where Benny and Bjorn eventually ended up. All the usual issues with suspect lyrics, and one song - Two For The Price of One - is possibly the worst thing they've ever done. It is all a bit bland and soulless. When they're good, they're brilliant, but there is too much filler here for repeated listens. This album is not essential listening. ABBA Gold is.
p551, 1986. 1 star. Poor man's Tears For Fears. Mark Hollis always sounds like he is straining, and not in a good way. It's all 80s synth and sax, long meandering tracks, and that ain't aged well. Soulless and dull. Not essential listening.
p92. 1966. 4 stars, 1 point deducted for being too clever by half. Bunch of smart arses taking the piss out of 60s American society and the music of the time and doing it really well. Still holds up today, and it's got some great tunes and production. There is a direct line from this to everything early 10cc did. I loved it, but satire and humour are subjective so some people might miss the point. I'm in love with Suzy Creamcheese :)
Not in my edition of the book! 5 stars Came cold to this, hadn't heard of the band or the album. Surprisingly good indie-pop. All sorts of good echoes/influences in here - late 60s Beach Boys, Radiohead. On the replay list.
p484. 1982. 4 stars The sound of a thousand UK early 80's nightclubs. This isn't about ABC, its all about Trevor Horn and his production. Quality work, fabulous orchestration, instantly recognisable and still fresh despite the 80's synths and sax. Some great tunes here, let down by dodgy lyrics. And it's all slightly pretentious... but fun. It's a bit like eating candyfloss, you know it's not good for you but you still enjoy it at the time. "Like a phoenix coming back/From the ashes/I know what's good/But I know what trash is"
p167. 1969. 2 stars Got to be honest, I've never been a fan of the Stones - booze soaked, drug raddled white boy blues rip-offs with a fucking annoying fat lipped gobshite who thinks he is God's gift to women for a front man. The faux blues-country whine he uses on most of this album is really annoying, especially when everyone knows he comes from Dartford. On the plus side they know how to knock out a good tune (Gimme Shelter, Midnight Rambler, though You Can't Always Get What You Want outstays its welcome), and the band is tight - Keith Richards is on form, and Nicky Hopkins and Ian Stewart stand out on every track they are on. At the end of the day it comes over as the so-so efforts of an average white band in it for the chicks.
p526. 1984. 2 stars Sounds like the bastard love child of Nick Cave and The Cure's Robert Smith, but without the talent. Perfectly acceptable without being exceptional in any way. A couple of OK singles, but that's it. On the plus side, it's short, so it doesn't outstay its welcome.
p392. 1977. 4 stars Stripped back rock and roll at its finest from one of the great voices. Two absolute bangers in the title track and The Passenger. Bowie production and vocals are a bonus. 1 point deducted for the filler (Neighbourhood Threat) and some tracks (Turn Blue, Fall In Love With Me) outstaying their welcome. Still essential listening.
p412. 1978. 1 star. Soulless, spandex-clad, big haired cock rock. Lots of sheen and not a shred of emotion. Yes, you can play the guitar fast, but if you don't put any passion into it then it turns into pomp rock wankage realllll fast. Jeff Beck gets more feeling in 3 minutes than this lot have managed in a career.
p415. 1978. 3 stars I knew the singles, but never listened to the album. This is good stuff - quality power pop, echoes of Blondie. The singles are the standout tracks, the rest is well done but not memorable. Short and sweet, still holds up today.
p342. 1975. 2 stars It's well done, but nothing outstanding - it just washed over me and left no residual trace. No standout tracks. Not a fan of reggae, so won't be revisiting.
p436. 1979. 3 stars Thin White Duke impersonator and Brian Ferry sound-alike steals the best bits from Roxy Music's "Stranded" and "Manifesto" and creates the template for Duran Duran, Midge Ure-led Ultravox and the entire New Romantic movement. If you like synths and moodiness then you can appreciate how influential this was. If not, then you'll get bored with this VERY quickly.
p705. 1993. 4 stars Elder statesman of Brit rock on top form. There is valid school of thought that says Paul Weller is a better songwriter than Elvis Costello, and they are right - there are more good tunes here than in the last 10 Costello albums. One star docked for the faux jazz wankage of the instrumentals - it didn't work with the Style Council, and it doesn't work here - and the vague worry that he is slowly turning into Eric Clapton.
p347, 1975. 4.5 stars He's always had a bloody awful voice, sounds like he's straining with bad haemorrhoids when he tries for any long notes. Set against that, he writes some cracking tunes and is a fabulous wordsmith. This sounds like something that Mark Knopfler should have written, and sung better. Half a star deducted for the voice.
p79. 1965. 4 stars Loveable 60s mop tops discover illicit substances, and expand minds and song writing potential. This is the departure point from covers and 3 minute pop gems - you can hear the cross-pollination between Dylan and The Byrds. It's Lennon-McCartney-Harrison, so there are more stone cold classics on this one album than most bands manage in a career. Docked a point for What Goes On, and the production which haven't aged well. This album is a bit like sex - when it's good, it's terrific, and when it's bad, well, it's still good.
p461, 1980. 2 stars It's not bad, its just not great either. Too many tracks just meander. Brian Eno on form though. Great guitar work on The Great Curve. Other than Once In A Lifetime, nothing left a lasting impression. Not on the replay list.
p634. 1990. 2 stars Instantly recognisable, lovely sound and production but... it's all a bit samey. Becomes background noise very quickly and there are no real standout tunes. Perfectly unremarkable 90's cocktail bar music. Not on the replay list.
p508. 1983. 3 stars. Above average rock band with glitter and a sly sense of humour. A refreshing change from the 80's synths at the time. You can see where The Killers got their inspiration from. Well done of its kind, but it's hardly essential listening.
p564. 1987. 2 stars. Prototype grunge. Nirvana meets Black Sabbath but without the songs or talent. The vocalist can't sing, and they do enjoy their feedback and squealing guitars, so its a bit harsh on the ears. There is also an unhealthy degree of weirdness (Poledo) and hard rock wankage. On the plus side, they do keep it short. Perfectly acceptable of its type, and probably on the list because of its influence rather than its quality, but points deducted for wankage and the vocals. Wouldn't listen to it again.
p778. 1996. 4 stars. So this is what the bastard love children of Donovan and Albert Lee sound like. Bittersweet songs, sharp lyrics and a sense of melancholy. All that is missing are some standout tunes. On the replay list.
p570. 1987. 4 stars One of the great voices evolves from pop pretty boy into accomplished blue-eyed soul boy/singer/songwriter. Who would have thought the man who wrote Club Tropicana could move on to Father Figure? Not a weak track on this, although you can make a case that I Want Your Sex outstays its welcome and that Look At Your Hands is filler. This still sounds great today. Essential listening.
p594. 1988. 1 star. A bloody mess more like. Badly mixed, tuneless noise, with no redeeming features. Lead vocalist can't sing. 38mins and 2 seconds of my life I'll never get back.
p241. 1971. 3 stars. Got to be honest, I have never cared for Robert Plant's voice, it strays too close to a hysteric shriek. He sounds like Roger Daltrey with added oestrogen. This is a schizophrenic album - a competent rock band with some good tunes that can't decide whether to play blues, be rock'n'rollers or folkies. And it suffers from the usual early 70's wankage which means a lot of the songs outstay their welcome. Didn't do it for me. Jimmy Page seems like a quite good guitarist though.
p318. 1974. 4 stars. In terms of influence, this is absolutely massive. Giorgio Moroder, Vangelis, Gary Newman and all of the 80's electro/synth bands owe this a huge debt, as well as John Carpenter and anyone working on sci-fi soundtracks in the 1980s. Aural cinema :) If you don't like atmospheric synths then you're going to hate this - but everyone should listen to this once in their lives.
p78. 1965. 4 stars Damn I love me some blues :) It doesn't get much better than this. The blueprint for everything Eric Clapton and Peter Green became famous for, only done better. One of the great guitarists on top form. 1 star deducted for it being a live album.
p586. 1988. 2 stars. This has not aged well - it sounds like every bad drum machine, synth and mid-80s cocktail bar musical cringeworthy cliche you can imagine. In particular the female backing vocalists and whoever did their arrangements need to be taken outside and shot. Twice. Shame, as there are some cracking tunes here, and lyrically he is still light years of the game.
p462. 1980. 2 stars All sorts of echoes here - Kraftwerk, Moroder, Bowie from his Low period. Depressing lyrics, harsh on the ears, repetitive songs. Vocals sounds like Jim Morrison after a bottle of bourbon and downers. Bleak machine music for a country under the early days of Thatcherism. No wonder Ian Curtis topped himself.
p176. 1969. 3 stars Yeehaw. Average band play average country rock songs. Well done of its kind I suppose but... just washed over me and left no residual trace. Only a couple of standout tunes, and a lot of the vocals veer into a thin whine far too often. I might be missing something, but on the other hand this album could just be really average.
p351. 1975. 5 stars Yes, it's overblown and over produced camp rock - but it's also an A grade rock band on top form with some cracking tunes and a sense of humour, and that covers a multitude of sins. There is a reason why Queen were so popular and why their songs are still played today, and this is the perfect illustration why. There isn't a weak track on it, although you can argue that The Prophet's Song outstays its welcome. And Brian May seems quite a good guitarist.
p505, 1983. 2 stars. So-so 80's Brit synth band with no tunes and desolate lyrics. A lot of the tracks meander and outstay their welcome. Bonus star for Jools Holland on Uncertain Smile, otherwise there is not too much to like here. Not on the replay list.
p582. 1987. 4 stars. The sound of late 80s stadium rock. Oddly enough, it's the most well known tracks - Where The Streets Have No Name, I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For, With Or Without You - that haven't aged well, it's like repeated plays have worn off any real impact they once had. The album really kicks in from Bullet The Blue Sky onwards. It's good stuff, not a weak track on it BUT then we come to Bono. You can only take so much Irish bombastic earnestness before thinking, "just shut the fuck up", so a point deducted for that. On the plus side, The Edge seems quite a good guitarist.
p155, 1968. 2 stars. Yeehaw. Former folk/psychedelic/pop idols go country in desperate attempt to reinvent themselves. Well done of its kind and in hindsight one of the key bridges between pop and country - you can see a direct line from this to The Eagles and The Dixie Chicks - but not my thing at all. Unlikely to play this again.
p556, 1986. 2 stars. I can see why it's influential - rap meets rock - but not my thing. The impression I get is other than the singles, a lot of the tracks sound the same and seem like filler. Unlikely to listen to this again. Well done of its kind though.
p836. 1998. 4 stars The bastard love children of Jean-Michel Jarre and Vangelis. Accessible electronic mood music for the masses. It's good, but does outstay its welcome on the longer tracks.
p446, 1979. 4 stars Ska meets disillusioned angry young men at the start of Thatcher's Britain. I don't usually like ska or reggae, but this is good - a rare example of the soundtrack to a moment in time that still sounds fresh today. Having said that... I like it, but don't love it. Just my taste in music.
p684. 1992. 2 stars. Average white boy garage band plays average white boy garage songs. Nothing memorable here. Why is this on the list?
p802. 1997. 3 stars. Weird, but it's got something. It's like the soundtrack to a B movie., along with the associated risk of it becoming background music You have to be in the right mood for this otherwise I should imagine it gets tired very quickly. Worth listening to though.
p174, 1969. 5 stars. 60's tail end classic. White man blues meets heavy rock with a garnish of folk, and world domination ensues. I'm still not a fan of Robert Plant's voice, but here it hasn't evolved into the hysterical shriek of later years. Bonham and Jones are on top form, and Jimmy Page seems quite a good guitarist.
p28. 1956. 4 stars. Feel-good primitive rock'n'roll that still sounds fresh today. Great sound, great production, great voice. The only thing missing is the same sense of excitement you get from a Little Richard or Jerry Lee Lewis track.
p709. 1993. 4 stars Accessible indy rock with distinct hints of Nirvana. Came cold to this and was pleasantly surprised. On the replay list.
p702. 1992. 3 stars The source of skinny white chick rock. Well done of its kind, but a lot of the songs tend to blur into one another after a while.
p943. 2016. 5 stars Gravel voiced old man ruminates on death and produces final work of power and beauty. Lyrically, still light years ahead of the competition, and this time we've got decent tunes and quality production to match the words. Not a weak track on it. I am guessing this will resonate more with an older audience.
p496. 1982. 3 stars THE soundtrack of a million 80s nightclubs worldwide. It's packed with hits, and Quincey Jones is on top form. Having said that, there is filler - Baby Be Mine, The Girl Is Mine (hang your head in shame Macca) - and the 80's synths haven't dated well (PYT). Jackson sounds like he never really cracked puberty, and those shrill whoops get annoying real soon. It's not as good as Off The Wall. "You're a vegetable (you're a vegetable)/Still they hate you (still they hate you)"
p251. 1971. 3 stars I feel like I should like this more than I do but... meh. Don't get me wrong, lyrically it's sharp, he had a cracking voice and it has its tunes, but I think it says a lot when the biggest track on it was written by someone else. And it has an utterly redundant cover of Let The Good Times Roll. When it's good, its very good, but there is a lot of filler that hasn't aged well. It feels and sounds like a hipster Billy Joel.
p475. 1981. 4.5 stars The sordid pale white underbelly of early 80s Britain disguised beneath brilliant electropop. Like or loathe him, Marc Almond has a terrific voice and sharp lyrics, whilst Dave Ball is simply a musical genius. At it's best this is brilliant - Youth and Say Hello Wave Goodbye are highlights, and it was a stroke of brilliance to tempt in the casual listener with Tainted Love, which proves that you can cover a song and make it your own. Set against that, some of the tracks outstay their welcome, and Entertain Me is filler. Apart from that, you get sex, kinks, self loathing, emptiness, isolation, all within the hits. I feel like I need a shower after listening to this.
p867. 2000. 2 stars Rap. Well done of its type - I like the Indian samples and jazz influences - but otherwise, not my thing at all. Would not listen to it again.
p805. 1997. 2 stars. Average white girl punk band with nothing to add to what The Runaways and The Go-Gos have done before. In fact it sounds like the Go-Gos. Well done of its kind but not essential listening. Why is this on the list?
p256. 1972. 2 stars. Primeval 70s hard rock. So this is where we put the blame for a thousand hysterical shrieking vocalists and an eternity of guitar wankage. I found this tedious beyond belief, really struggled to listen all the way through. Well produced though. Thank god for punk.
p825. 1998. A perfect example of the artist's surname reflecting the content. It's a bit like porridge, you consume it to fill a need but it leaves you feeling vaguely unsatisfied. Every track sounds the same, and the cover of Say Hello Wave Goodbye is appalling, it sounds like a dirge. The entire album is background noise for a 90s dinner party. Definitely not essential listening.
p569. 1987. 3 stars. Broody Goth rock meets Jim Steinman and ends up sounding like late 70's Bowie/Iggy. It's OK, but nothing special.
p344. 1975. 3 stars The epitome of 70's singer-songwriter albums. Great voice, sharp lyrics, all sorts of things going on here - burundi beat, jazz, West Coast AOR. Not to everyone's taste, and probably not as good as Blue. 1 star deducted for dated production - dig that electric piano baby! - and some tracks outstay their welcome.
p829. 1998. 5 stars. Madge on top form. Not a weak track on this. Excellent production. Still sounds great 20 years on.
p75, 1965. 5 stars. One of the all time great vocalists shows how it should be done. Yes, most of these are covers, but they are mostly definitive versions that you'll have heard a thousand times before, and they still sound great. Production is excellent and the MG's are on absolutely top form. There is something on this album for everyone every time you listen to it.
p201. 1970. 4 stars Late 60s hippies wake up in a new decade and discover country. Fantastic harmonies, fine musicianship, great tunes - what's not to like? Still holds up after 50+ years, although you can argue that Country Girl is filler and that Our House is as weak as a kitten. Imagine what they could have done if they hadn't been perpetually wasted and/or soaked in booze.
p53. 1960. 4.5 stars. Damn I love blues, and this is as pure as it gets. Half a point deducted for being a live album, but other than that it's perfect.
p367. 1976. 3 stars Primeval trippy electro music from the 70s, and hence a high degree of musical wankage. Outstays its welcome on most of the tracks, and oh my, didn't someone have fun passing those synth sounds from speaker to speaker? Vangelis did this kind of thing much better IMHO. Perfectly acceptable of its kind, but it's all a bit pompous and sterile.
p364. 1975. 3 stars Perfectly acceptable fodder, well produced with a sense of humour but... not my thing. It's missing standout tracks. Listened to it, thought it was OK, then forgot about it.
p729. 1994. 2 stars. Hip-hop/rap. Not my thing at all, so 2 stars. Like the bass and production though, and there are a couple of OK tracks like Life's A Bitch. On the whole, 40 mins of my life I won't get back.
p688. 1992. 3 stars Middle of the road songs offset by terrific voice and production. There simply aren't enough standout songs - after a while they tend to just blur in to each other. Not sure it is essential listening.
p872. 2001. 3 stars. The Icelandic love child of Sinead O'Connor and David Lynch. This sounds like the lost soundtrack to Twin Peaks. Having said that, their is only so much weirdness you can listen to before it gets boring. Well done of its kind, but becomes background music real soon.
p316. 1974. 2 stars. This ain't aged well. Vague echoes of early Hall and Oates but without the melodies. The boy's got talent - he plays nearly everything on the album, and some tracks like Rainy Day, Sweet Thang and Freedom Flight show promise - but there's a reason why this didn't sell in the first place, and its because its utterly forgettable. Why is this even on the list?
p97. 1966. 4.5 stars. Classic 60s Brit blues. This is where Clapton made his reputation, and he still sounds light years of most of the competition. There a couple of filler tracks - the cover of What I Say outstays its welcome - but other than that it doesn't get much better than this.
p252. 1971. 4 stars Fey, but muscular. Absolutely fabulous early 70s glam rock. As with all things Bolan, lyrically suspect, but the riffs and band and production are still fantastic. Some filler, especially on the 2nd side, but if you can't dance to at least one track on this you are officially dead. "Just like a car/You're pleasing to behold/I'll call you Jaguar/If I may be so bold" "Girl I'm just a vampire for your love/And I'm gonna SUCK ya"
p121. 1967. 1 star Poor man's Johnny Cash. All the worst excesses of country music are here. I really struggled to listen to the entire album. On the plus side the songs are short. Definitely not my thing. "If I could die/My pain might go away". I wish he would.
p122. 1967. 5 stars Sounds as fresh today as when it was first issued. Not a weak track on this. Hugely influential. Raised the bar for every other guitarist without ever straying in wankage, although you can argue that Third Stone From The Sun outstays its welcome. Noel Redding and Mitch Mitchell on top form. Packed with genuine rock classics. This one is essential listening.
p78, 1965. 1 star There is a reason that jazz fell out of favour, and this is a prime example of why. It might be technically excellent, but for the casual listener it simply isn't accessible - it comes across as formless, self indulgent, meandering musical wankage. This is 32 minutes of my life I will never get back.
Not in my edition of the book! 2007. 3.5 stars. Fabulous synthesis of indie pop and 60's psychedelia, irritating catchy riffs and vague Beatle-ish overtones. Time To Pretend and Kids are standouts, but a lot of the album is filler. This would get a 4 on a good day.
p24. 1956. 3 stars. Primeval white rock'n'roll. Even after this time, the voice is terrific. Fabulous guitar solos from Scotty Moore, and Bill Black and DJ Fontana are rock solid on bass and drums. Set against that, there is an awful lot of filler, especially on the maudlin ballads, and some of the covers don't add anything to the originals. When this is good it's excellent - it's there are just too many average songs to give this anything other than a 3. But that voice...
p476. 1981. 1 star. Dreary and soulless synth pop. This is the soundtrack to every dull grey wet Tuesday in Liverpool in Thatcher's Britain. Most the album is the band farting about with synths on songs that outstay their welcome - who the fuck needs a 7 minute "moody" instrumental, it's like punk never happened, eh lads? And what the fuck is the album title about? Pretentious wankers.
p206. 1970. 2 stars. Bland late 60's/70's CSN&Y wannabees with no redeeming features. Sounds like the less talented younger brothers of the Band. Well done of its kind, but utterly forgettable. Not essential listening.
p470. 1980. 4 stars. Fabulous rock-pop-punk hybrid. Outstanding songs and vocals about sex, desire and loathing. Needs to be played loud for maximum impact. 1 star deducted for occasionally straying into guitar wankage. Still sounds fresh 40 years on. PJ Harvey has based her entire career on trying to write something as good as this.
p251. 1971. 4 stars Came cold to this and was pleasantly surprised. Lyrically sharp as a razor and some good tunes. Sounds like country-era Dylan, which isn't for everyone, but once you get past the strings and slide guitar it's terrific - there is a direct line from this to Springsteen's Nebraska. It's everything The Band aspired to and failed to deliver. Probably too country for most, but it's definitely worth a second listen.
p890. 2002. 2 stars Hip-hop, so not my thing at all. Well done of its kind, and had me tapping my foot, but a lot of the tracks just blurred into each other.
p639. 1990. 2 stars Adequate pub-rock band tries to be Rod Stewart and the Faces, only without the talent or songs. It says a lot when the most successful song is a cover. This is just average - why is this album on the list?
p50. 1960. 2 stars Well, this ain't aged well. It's mostly a collection of mediocre pop songs, saved only the Voice. There are maybe 2 songs that stand up to comparison with his pre-Army songbook, and on the couple of occasions that the songs are decent, we have the Jordanaires droning on it. And who let that sax player in?? Seriously, this album sounds like something meant for Bobby Vinton or Pat Boone. The boy had the looks, the moves, and the Voice. Just a shame that he rarely got the songs to match.
p230. 1971. 2 stars On the plus side: if you want an example of why Duane Allman rates alongside Clapton and Hendrix as the greatest guitarist of all time, look no further. This is it. On the negative side: if you want an example of excessive, overly long, wankage filled early '70s southern blues/rock, look no further. This is it. Don't get me wrong, the musicianship is great and Duane Allman is fantastic but... it's too much, and too long. Seriously, did anyone actually enjoy 15-20 minute "jams" on a live album unless they were stoned? Maybe you had to be there.
p656. 1991. 4 stars. Point deducted for suspect lyrics, filler tracks on the 2nd half of the album, and for ripping off "More Than A Feeling" by Boston. Apart from that, this is pretty good. "Here we are now/Entertain us/A mulatto/An albino/A mosquito/My libido/Yeah"
p455. 1980. 2 stars. The sound of musicians that were born 10 years too late and wish the 60s had never ended. This sounds like an album of 13th Floor Elevators, Byrds and Ziggy Stardust outtakes, only without the talent. Listening to it you'd have thought that punk never happened. Quite good guitar playing, though it frequently strays in 70s wankage. It's OK, but nothing special - no idea why this is on the list.
p300. 1973. 3 stars All the evidence you need to prove that Elton John is best as a singles artist. When it's good, it's very good but... most of it is filler, and do we really need a 5 minute instrument as the opener? The production hasn't aged well - one listen and you know it was recorded in the early 70s. This could have been a stunning single album - just needs the fat trimming off.
p390. 1977. 5 stars Costello when he could still knock out a decent tune. Listening to this, you can see what the fuss was about - razor sharp lyrics, minimal production, and short snappy songs that actually stick in the ear. This is the standard he set himself, and it's just sad to hear the thin meandering whining that he puts out these days compared to this.
p94. 1966. 5 stars A perfect time capsule of the mid 60s, capturing all the hope and fears of the era in 28 minutes. 50 years on this is still an example of why Paul Simon is one of the greatest songwriters ever, and why Art Garfunkel is one of the greatest vocalists ever. Classic.
p88. 1966. 3 stars. The primeval ancestors of Blur. Pros: Ray Davies can knock out a tune, and lyrically he's as sharp as Costello or Weller. Cons: he can't sing, the Kinks weren't great musicians, and the production hasn't dated that well. Compare this with Revolver or Pet Sounds from the same year and all the flaws really show up. It's more of a historical significance piece - "look what Ray Davies was doing at the same time as Dylan and Lennon and Wilson".
p638. 1990. 3 stars The bastard love children of The Byrds and Love. Lots of jangly guitars and OK tunes, but there's an overwhelming feeling that this was done by a late 60s B-list band, and the record company rejected the album. There She Goes is the only standout track. Well done of its kind but not outstanding.
p874. 2001. 2 stars Velvet Underground wannabees without the style or the substance. Great album cover though.
p845. 1999. 3 stars. Mood music/background listening, with samples and Asian influences to hook you in. Well done of its kind, but it does outstay its welcome.
p648. 1990. 1 star. Shouty power pop with no redeeming features. Green Day without the tunes. No thank you. Why is this on the list?
p864. 2000. 3 stars Classy soul/jazz background music. Vaguely reminiscent of What's Going On, but without any standout tracks. It sounds like a Nora Jones outtakes album. Can imagine this being played whilst the black forest gateaux is being served.
p578. 1987. 1 star. This is noise, not music. It sounds like acne ridden teenage boys finding their older brothers guitar and drum kit and pretending to be Motorhead, and doing it badly. It is loud, badly played, pointless, pretentious, annoying random shite. Avoid.
p483. 1981. 1970s Canadian-American prog-rockers, and that in itself should be enough warning. I can't stand Geddy Lee's vocals, he sounds like his testicles have only just dropped. You could put him in a room with Jon Anderson and Roger Hodgson and have your own boys choir. And as with all things prog-rock, there is excessive musical wankage. Not my thing at all.
p115. 1967. 2 stars Well, the voice is fantastic, but this isn't his best work. Frank barely breaks a sweat, and sounds half asleep in a lot of the songs, and the arrangements pale in comparison to those of Nelson Riddle. Each track sounds the same as the one before, and the bossa nova vibe hasn't aged well. It's bland, and that ain't good.
p36. 1957. 5 stars The raw DNA of rock'n'roll and that would follow. Little Richard crams in more excitement and energy in the opening track than some artists manage in an entire career. There isn't a weak track on this.
Not in my edition of the book so! Obviously not essential to listen to before you die! 2012. 1 star. Purile, sexist, misogynistic, obnoxious shite that gets boring reallll fast. Strange that it's OK for black rappers to use the N* word but if anyone else does you're racist. Or that it's OK for them to call women bitches and pussy and hoes (whores), but if anyone else does you're misogynistic. Or that it's OK from them to to boast about how high and doped they get, but if anyone else does then you're just a fucked up junkie. Just saying. "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower/So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". FFS, grow up.
p270. 1972. 3 stars CSNY meet the Byrds and Merle Haggard. Well done of its kind, but not many standout songs. It frequently strays into musical wankage and outstays its welcome. Would have been a far better single album.
p948. 2017. 3 stars Kiwi Pink wannabee but without the songs. Sharp lyrics, which is a plus, but a long of the songs blur into one another. It's OK, but not great.
p606. 1989. 2 stars Average Aerosmith/Kiss wannabees with average songs play loud to try and cover up deficiencies and fail. The best song on this is a cover. Nothing to keep your attention here, move along. WTF is this doing on the list?
p213. 1970. 3 stars. 60's white soul boy gets jazzy and throws in some folk to spice it up. It's well done, but there are no standout tracks, and you get all the usual musical wankage you expect from early 70s albums. It says a lot that the best track on it is an old English folk song. On the plus side, it is is short.
p169. 1969. 3 stars. One of the great white female voices on top form, but let down by suspect material and production. When it works (Just a Little Lovin', Son Of A Preacher Man, I Don't Want To Hear It, Breakfast In Bed, Just One Smile, I Can't Make It Alone), it's fabulous. Unfortunately the rest of the songs are filler, some of the production hasn't aged well - the strings quickly veer into middle of the road syrup - and the cover of The Windmills Of Your Mind is pure cheese.
p718. 1993. 4 stars. Good things: great production, some great songs. Bad things: Bjork's voice. It's the aural equivalent of a cheese grater on the fingertips.
p141. 1968. 3.5 stars. Schizophrenic mix of pop, country, folk and 60's psychedelia wrapped up in an aura of world weariness. It's odd, but it's got something, and it still sounds fresh nearly 50 years on.
p321. 1974. 3 stars. Vaguely pretentious glam/pomp rock that outstays its welcome and frequently strays into early 70's rock wankage. Well done though, and Brian May seems quite a good guitarist. Other than Seven Seas of Rye, it's missing standout tunes. Not sure it's essential listening.
p744. 1994. 5 stars Great songs, great production, great guitar work and THAT voice. And it has the rarest of things, a cover that has become the definitive version. Faultless. To what heights could he have risen...
p204. 1970. 3 stars This is going to be unpopular opinion, but I don't think Robert Plant can sing. He sounds like a castrated bullock that has inhaled helium. It's like a weird high tone yelling. Combine that with the 7+ minute wankage that is "Since I've Been Loving You Too Long" and it makes your ears bleed. Shame, because there are some good songs on this, the rest of the band are on form, and Jimmy Page seems quite a good guitarist.
p126. 1967. 4 stars. Ethereal mood music with an Indian vibe. Had low expectations of this and was pleasantly surprised - excellent production and musicianship. Not sure I will listen to it again, but glad I did.
p662. 1991. 2 stars, but should be 1.5. Distinctly average, and far too long for what it is. Not keen on the shouty white faux funk/rap, and most of the tracks sound the same and just blur into each other. Set against that, excellent musicianship and there are a couple of good tunes - but not enough to deserve repeated listening.
p460. 1980. 1.5 stars. Well done of its type, but definitely not my thing. Rob Halford can't sing, and there is a lot of filler. It's dull and left no lasting impression, and the final track (Red White And Blue) is an abomination. Really struggled to listen to this one all the way through. Not essential listening.
p888. 2002. 4 stars. Nick Drake for the new millennium. Came cold to this and was pleasantly surprised - strong lyrics, excellent musicianship and production. On the repeat listen list.
Not in my edition of the book! 2000. 1.5 star. Shouty white boy rap metal noise. Gets tedious VERY quickly. Shame, as they seem to be adequate musicians. Not essential listening.
Not in my edition of the book! 2018. 5 stars The millennium lovechild of The Dixie Chicks, Joni Mitchell and Lana Del Rey. Great songs, lovely voice, classy warm production and excellent musicianship. On the repeat play list.
p254. 1971. 5 stars. One of the great singer/songwriters on absolute top form. There is not a weak track on this. Exquisite musicianship and production. What's not to like?
p560, 1986. 2 stars Jangly 80s guitar music for lonely pasty faced Mancs in long overcoats whilst standing on damp street corners in the rain, waiting in vain for someone to notice them. Everyone has a musical blind spot, an artist or band that everyone loves and which you just don't like. The Smiths are my blind spot. I don't like Morrisey's whinging whine of a voice, and too many of their songs sound the same. 2 stars for the couple of songs that sound different from the others and for Johnny Marr's guitar work.
p264. 1972. 5 stars. Camp, sardonic glam rock classic. 50 years on and it still sounds terrific. Half a star deducted for suspect lyrics (Andy's Chest), but otherwise this is practically flawless.
p775. 1996. 1.5 stars. Vaguely annoying, repetitious, soulless electro Europop with bland vocals and no tunes. Strays into synth wankage far too often. Well produced, but outstays its welcome big time. Not essential listening in any shape or form.
p316, 1974. 3 stars This is going to sound like heresy, but I don't think Steve Wonder is a great album artist. The singles are usually fantastic, and there are always one or two standout tracks, but there is also a lot of filler - and this album is no exception. I appreciate the craftmanship, but not sure I would listen to it again.
p607. 1989. 4 stars Well done pilfering of Prince, Hendrix and Beatles circa Abbey Road. Was surprised at how much I liked this. 1 star deducted for some tracks outstaying their welcome. Still on the replay list, though.
p431. 1979. 2 stars The problems here are David Byrne's voice - he can't sing - and no standout songs. It's instantly forgettable, other than the "singing". The best thing about this is Brian Eno's production. Not sure this is essential listening.
p665. 1991. 2 stars Hip hop/rap. Well done of its kind but not my thing at all hence 2 stars.
p400. 1978. 1 star. Unpleasant mixture of Talking Heads, 13th Floor Elevators and The Doors, only without the songs or the talent. And David Thomas cannot sing. This is bloody awful. 35 minutes of my life I will never get back.
Victim of poor quality control and letting the untalented song writing members of the group contribute. There is a LOT of filler - both the Copeland and Summers tracks are B side material at best, and there worrying hints of the faux jazz wankage that Sting strayed into as a solo artist. Points also deducted for suspect and vaguely repellent lyrics - Every Breath You Take is every stalker's theme tune. Bit of a shame really, because when Sting is on form he can definitely knock a tune out. When this is good, it's very good. "Hey Mr. Dinosaur/You really couldn't ask for more/You were God's favourite creature/But you didn't have a future." How prescient.
Not in my edition of the book! 1999. 4 stars Interesting Brit alt guitar rock that wants to be Godspeed You! Black Emperor when it grows up, but with lyrics. Could be the soundtrack to a cult urban horror film. Good if you like this sort of thing, which I do.
p45. 1959. 3 stars Jazz, so points immediately deducted. Inoffensive background music for cocktail and hipster bars. Technically impressive. but meanders far too often and is soulless. Saved from 2 stars for Take 5, but would not listen to again. "Nice" - The Fast Show.
p370. 1976. 2 stars African jazz-funk background music. Pleasant enough, but outstays its welcome. Probably best enjoyed outdoors at a music festival on a sunny day when smoking a quality spliff. Unfortunately you rarely any of those in Stoke. Unlikely to listen to this again.
p52. 1960. 3.5 stars THE sound of pre-Beatles white teenage America. In their heyday, the Everlys hit the sweet spot - cute AF for the girls, and cool enough to appeal to the guys. However - there's a lot of filler, and some of the sentiments in the songs are so sweet that they strip enamel from your teeth, but those harmonies can save even the most dire pop song. When they get a great song - and there are some great ones here - it's fabulous. There is just too much filler and saccharine to rate it more than 3 stars.
p127. 1968. 1 star. Unattractive 60s art-house rock. You can see its influence on punk rock, but that doesn't mean it's good. Outstays its welcome on most of the tracks, especially the 17 minute wankage that is Sister Ray. You can see why it didn't sell. Would not listen to it again.
p297. 1973. 2 stars, but would give it 1.5 if that were an option. Tedious 1970s jazz-funk with loooooong double digit minute tracks. Sounds like the rejected soundtrack for a blaxploitation film. As with most jazz, technically proficient, but it leaves me cold.
p305. 1973. 3 stars No frills quality 70s southern blues/rock. No track longer than 4 minutes, so it never outstays its welcome or gets bogged down by guitar wankage. Prefect driving music. On the other hand... a lack of standout tracks, a lot of them sound the same.
p295. 1973. 3 stars, just. The soundtrack to a million 70s seductions. Has not aged well - production sounds dated, and a lot of the tracks are filler. Set against that, you have one of THE great soul voices on absolutely top form.
p610. 1989. 5 stars An absolutely perfect pop record. And beneath the shiny veneer of love songs and chart hits there are also songs about religion, domestic abuse, sex, dysfunctional family relationships, loneliness and loss. There is not a weak track on this. "Romeo and Juliet/They never felt this way I bet"
p235. 1971. 2 stars. 70's German prog-rock/jazz wankage with Japanese vocals. Let's not forget that previous collaborations between Germany and Japan have not ended well. Alarm bells went off as soon as I looked at the track times... 7:28, 7:23, 18:32, 17:37, 11:37, 6:27. FFS. Early fears confirmed, lots of pointless noodling and dodgy vocals. Outstays its welcome after 5 mins. Shame as the bass and drums are really tight - all sorts of future influences for 90's club and dance. Never trust a double album made by German hippies.
p208. 1970. 2.5 stars. Perfectly acceptable background listening, with no redeeming features. There is a reason this didn't sell when it came out, and that reason is there are no standout tracks. It's the perfect background music for a million hipster bars. It's the aural equivalent of porridge.
p865. 2000. 5 stars New millennium Chrissie Hynde. Great tunes, great songs, great attitude, great image. What's not to like?
p352. 1975. 4 stars Country/Americana with most of the saccharine extracted. Most of the tracks are short, so it doesn't outstay its welcome. Yeehaw, but in a good way.
p769. 1995. 1 star. The background music they use in stores selling Gwyneth Paltrow's "This Smells Like My Vagina" candles. Wannabe Marvin Gaye for the 90s, only without the talent or the voice. This was a key influence on Craig David - so! We finally have someone to blame! Can't be doing with high pitched male voices, especially when they are used on such bland material. This is soulless and instantly forgettable.
p631. 1988. 1 star. Arrogant, puerile noise. Shouting "fuck" and "motherfucker" every other sentence is neither "big" or clever. This noise is obnoxious on pretty much every level - misogyny, homophobia, violence, toxic masculinity, its all there if you want it. I don't.
p100. 1967. 5 stars. Not a weak track on it, and it has aged astonishingly well for something that is over 50 years old. There are more ideas and quality tunes on this album that most bands manage in a 10 year career.
p322. 1974. 2 stars 70s art rock for lounge lizards. Well done, but oddly soulless and emotionless. Only a couple of standout tunes, certainly not enough to repay repeated listening.
p905. 2005. 2.5 stars. Rap, so... not my thing. Seems to be well done, but only 2 stars as I don't like rap. Liked the last track though.
p220. 1970. 1 star. Drug addled half baked outtakes from an acidhead casualty do not make for interesting listening. WTF is this doing on this list? "I tattooed my brain all the way/Won't you miss me? Wouldn't you miss me at all?" Actually Syd, no we won't.
p228. 1971. 3.5 stars. Not his best album - see Hot Buttered Soul for that - and as with most 70s double albums it outstays its welcome. Do we really need 19 minute plus workout? Having said that, it's still good, easily accessible soul with silk smooth strings, and the title track is a perfect 4:39 snapshot of the early 70s.
p33. 1957. 1 star Dreadfully dated, and outstayed its welcome very quickly. Might be influential but not my thing.
p275. 1972. 4 stars One of the great singer/songwriters shows to successfully transition from the 60s to the 70s in style. It's not perfect - there is quite a bit of filler - but there are enough standout tracks to make up the gap, and Simon is also an excellent and underrated guitarist.
p425. 1979. 3.5 stars. Perfect snapshot of classy late 70s disco, packed with hits and with Nile Rodgers and Bernard Edwards on top form. Well done of its kind, but as with all disco it outstays its welcome. Not essential listening.
p721. 1993. 2 stars. Average early 90s Brit rock wannabees, stuck between the Stone Roses and The Lightning Seeds but without the tunes or the talent. Strays into "just noise" far too often and outstays its welcome big time. Not essential listening.
p649. 1990. 2 stars. Hip-hop, so not my thing. Well done of its kind but... meh. On the plus side, most of the tracks are short. Bonus point for Fight The Power.
p541. 1985. 2 stars Bland, middle of the road faux jazz/soul, only without the technique or the soul. One massive hit and a lot of filler. Not essential listening. Q. Whatâs the difference between Simply Red and a bull? A. The bull has the horns at the front and the arsehole at the back
p679. 1992. 1.5 stars Background synth music. Well done but instantly forgettable, and it really outstays its welcome. Someone whistle me a tune from any of the 74 tedious minutes. Anyone? No, thought not.
p751. 1994. 2 stars. Rehashed punk/New Wave for the early 90s, with a couple of radio friendly tunes. The Undertones did this first and much better. And Billie Joe Armstrong sounds like he has a bad cold.
p832. 1998. 3.5 stars. So this is what happens if you splice the genes of The Bangles and The Pretenders. Surprisingly accessible jangly guitar rock, but a lot of the tracks sound the same. On the replay list.
p419. 1978. 1 star. Lazy, bland, middle of the road album of covers by a distinctly below average singer. This is background music for department stores. WTF is this doing on the list?
p35. 1957. 2.5 stars 50s Latin big band jazz. Too many bongos, but perfectly acceptable otherwise. Not sure I would listen to it again.
p31. 1957. 5 stars Stripped down, primeval white rock'n'roll at its finest. Instantly recognisable sound, packed with genuine classics. It still sounds great today.
p196. 1970. 1 star. It's probably technically exquisite but... ffs, do we really need a double album of 70's jazz wankage and 20+ minute shapeless, pointless, free form tracks? There is no difference between this and all those double album prog rock albums from the same era that no-one listens to. Life is too short for this.
p250. 1971. 2.5 stars. 70s country tinged Dylan wannabee, but without the standout tunes. It's perfectly acceptable, and he has a better voice than Dylan, but it's mostly typical early 70s bland singer/songwriter meandering.
p502. 1982. 3.5 stars Classy 80s Brit synth pop. Hasn't aged well - the cheesy sax and synths are firmly of the era, some of the tracks outstay their welcome, and points are deducted for dodgy lyrics. On the plus side, there are some cracking tunes in here, and at least they weren't Spandau Ballet. 3.5 stars on a bad day, 4 on a good one.
p331. 1974. 3.5 stars. Classic early 70s singer songwriter fodder. Not his best, but still worth a listen.
p238 .1971. 3 stars Quality country singer/song writer, clean production and doesn't outstay its welcome. Points deducted for occasionally straying into saccharine so sweet it can strip the enamel from your teeth.
p397. 1978. 4 stars Would be 5 stars just for its influence on most of the early 1980s synth bands and 90s electro/trance. Even without that it still sounds great. One point docked for most of the tracks outstaying their welcome.
p152. 1968. 3.5 stars. A nearly perfect snapshot of late 60s cabaret by one of the great voices, with subversive lyrics beneath the strings and Spectoresque production. All that is missing are standout tracks. Still holds up well today.
p156. 1968. 4 stars. This might sound like heresy, but there is a LOT of filler here. Trim that out and you would have a 5 star album. On the plus side, there is still more inventiveness and melody here than most bands manage in a 10 year career.
p527. 1984. 3.5 stars. Sounds like Edwyn Collins hipster kid brother. Jangly 80s guitars, bitter sweet cynical lyrics, but missing standout tunes. If the rest of the album was as strong as Perfect Skin you'd be looking at 5 stars... But it isn't.
p673. 1991. 3.5 stars. Classy Brit fusion of hip-hop, reggae and trance. Shouldn't work on paper, but somehow does. Unfortunately a lot of the tracks sound the same, and points deducted for tracks outstaying their welcome.
p212. 1970. 4 stars How to emerge from the long shadow of The Beatles in style. Far too long - does anyone really need a triple album? - and a lot of the third disc is pure instrumental filler. When it's good, its very good indeed - with judicious editing this would have been a 5 star single (maybe even a double) album.
p878. 2001. 5 stars Gorgeous, stripped down guitar rock with quality tunes. There is a direct line from this back to 50s Sun Records Elvis. What's not to like?
p842. 1999. 3 stars. Well done hipster pop, but far too long for what it is. Do we really need 3 albums of this in one sitting? Don't get me wrong, there are some cracking tunes and sharp lyrics... but it definitely outstays its welcome and gets annoying after a while. A bit of judicious editing and this could have been 5 stars.
p798. 1997. 5 stars. Cracking tunes, great vocals, sharp lyrics, even sharper production. Not a weak track on this.
p823. 1998. 3.5 stars. Woody Guthrie lyrics and Billy Bragg tunes. Well done, but feels a bit "worthy", and is not exceptional. Worth a listen.
Not in my edition of the book. 1 star. (C)Rap. Angry black man rants about motherf**kers, killing people, taking drugs, and refers to woman as "sluts with a nice butt to get a nut"... and then on his biggest hit asks "come on and give me a hug". Tedious, misogynistic, macho posturing rubbish. "Your mami, your papi, that bitch you chasin'/Your little dirty ass kids, I'll fucking erase 'em"
p527. 1984. 2 stars Well done of its kind but left me cold. Bonus star for the guitar work of Mamadou "Jimi" Mbaye.
p511. 1983. 4 stars. Stripped down Southern rock meets 80s synths and produces classic hybrid. Great guitar work and riffs, but a lot of the tracks sound the same and you can argue that most of them outstay their welcome.
p432. 1979. 2 stars. Dreary and depressing meh for the most part. Ian Curtis sounds like Jim Morrison on Valium. Bonus star for the bass work.
Not in my edition of the book! 2 stars, borderline 2.5. Canadian Deacon Blue but without the tunes. Noisy, meandering hipster noodling with no redeeming features. A couple of decent tunes but not much else.
p242. 1971. 2 stars. Well, that was weird. Glad I heard it but not sure I'll revisit it.
p892. 2003. 1.5 stars Hip-hop/rap, so wrong audience. Limited talent spread too thinly over a double album. Pass.
p916. 2007. 4 stars, 5 on a good day. Brit electro hip-hop meets Burundi beat and other world music, which on paper sounds like a bloody awful idea - but it's actually rather good. Started with low expectations and found myself adding to the replay list.
p60. 1963. 4.5 stars. Lyrically light years ahead of the competition at the time, and still a million times better than most of the dross served up today. He could knock up a decent tune as well - there are stone cold classics on this - and his voice isn't shot. Half a star docked for the occasional filler track.
p649. 2 stars. Hip-hop/rap, so the wrong audience. Seems well done of its kind though.
p929. 2010. 2.5 stars. Well done and definitely varied, but distinctly average. Very little of it stands out. Would not listen to it again.
p573. 1987. 3 stars One of my musical blind spots. I don't like The Smiths, mostly because of Morrissey's whining voice, its like a mosquito on Valium. Set against that, this is actually OK - unlike most of their other albums, the songs don't all sound the same. Still a blind spot though.
p62. 1963. 5 stars. Ah c'mon, you know every track on this. Listening to this is like catching up with a favourite family member or friend each year. And it's brilliantly done, the sound of a pre-Beatles, pre-JFK assassination American Christmas captured in one perfect moment. There isn't a weak track on this. As for this being randomly generated... this turned up on my list on 23rd Dec. Co-incidence? I think not :)
p129. 5 stars. One of the great voices on absolutely top form, with the songs and production to match it. There is not a weak track on this.
p182. 1969. 3 stars. Jazz influenced CSN&Y/Love clones. Very much a mixed bag - a couple of tracks are over 6 minutes long, which sets the pointless late 60's noodling alarms off, and a couple are less than a minute, so it's a bit pointless having them on. Bit of shame, because when it's good it's not bad at all.
p280. 1972. 5 stars. Perfect.
p74. 1965. 2 stars. Background noise for drunken 60s frat parties. This is an average garage band offering covers and a handful of barely adequate originals. Bonus point for putting the effort in though. Why is this on the list?
p299. 1973. 5 stars. Quality English musical eccentricity. I am not a fan of 70s prog-rock or pointless, meandering noodling with instruments - but this is good. What sets it well above the dross is the sheer variety of music themes and styles that Mike Oldfield manages to blend together, and none of them outstay their welcome before moving on the next one. Half a point deducted for the caveman grunts on side 2, but a bonus half a point for Vivian Stanshall.
p380. 1977. 4 stars. This is a strange one. First side is classic Bowie, great songs and delivery, with Tony Visconti on top form. The second side is a suite of electronic ambient tracks, this time with Brian Eno on top form. Not easily accessible but repays repeated listening.
p221. 1971. 2 stars Suspect early 70's prog-folk rock. With a flute. FFS. This has not aged well - you can practically smell the stale patchouli and incense sticks - and it suffers from the usual 70s musical wankage. Pass. "Never trust a hippy" - John Lyndon
p86. 1966. 3 stars. Classy 60s singer/songwriter. Great voice and production. There is a direct line from this to Tim Buckley and "Grace". The only thing missing are more standout songs. Good stuff.
p822. 1998. 2 stars. Eclectic collection of songs, ideally suited to sun and warmer climes. Unfortunately it is January in Stoke and it's currently -1. Perfectly acceptable fare, but not sure it's essential listening.
p748. 1994. 2 stars. Unpleasantly, shouty noise with the occasional whimpering. There is not much to like here. Bonus point for Hurt. Oh, and Johnny Cash's cover is the definitive version, Trent.
Not in my edition of the book! 2015. 3 stars No doubting that she can write a tune and has got a good voice but... I don't think she's moved on from her earlier (and better albums). This goes on a bit, and on a lot of the songs she sounds like a pub singer. It's perfectly acceptable fare, but it's not essential. If you're going to have one Adele album, listen to 21.
p882. 2001. 2 stars. Overly long pretentious tosh. Do we really need another album of eccentric noodling with the occasional decent song? No. Nothing to see here, move on.
p388. 1977. 2 stars. The Doors meet Nick Cave, but without any talent or songs. OK for maybe two tracks, which is all you need. Not for me. Bonus point for the screaming.
p104. 1967. 3.5 stars. 60s psychedelic blues/rock smorgasborg. Great vocals. Ry Cooder on top form. Still sounds great now. All that is missing are some standout tunes. Points deducted for filler and outstaying its welcome - nobody needs an album with several tracks >6 mins.
p199. 1970. 3 stars. Yes, it's middle of the road. Yes, it's the background music to a thousand 70s cheese and wine parties. Yes, you can practically smell the prawn cocktail starters and black forest gateaux. Yes, it can be bland and frequently strays into Broadway show tune styling. And yet, and yet... it's one of THE great voices mostly set against arrangements that allow it to shine. There are at least two modern standards here (We've Only Just Begun, Close To You) which is more than most bands manage in a career. When it's good, its very good indeed.
p236. 1971. Elton before he started strangling his vowels. Great voice, great songs, great production. Still sounds fresh today. Point deducted for some tracks straying to the usual early 70s 5 minutes+ wankage.
p928. 2010. 3.5 stars Hip-hop/rap, so wrong audience, and comes with the usual foul language and misogynistic "lyrics" typical of the genre. Having said that, musically there is a LOT to like here - it's accessible, great hooks and faultless production. There's enough here to make me want to listen to his other albums, but I don't listen to those who admire Hitler. "Bitch I'm a monster no good blood sucker/Fat muthaf-cker now look who's in trouble"
Not in my edition of the book! 2011. 5 stars. Adele before she became a parody of herself. Cracking voice, and the albums is packed with great tunes. What's not to like?
p301. 1973. 2 stars Country, so wrong audience. It's OK, but its not great. On the plus side, it doesn't outstay its welcome.
p926. 2009. 2 stars. Stripped down ambient background music for hipsters. Perfectly acceptable, but utterly forgettable.
p81. 1965. 3 stars On the list for historical significance. It's difficult to state just how important and influential this was in the day - you've got the jump from folk to rock, the extended 5+ minutes tracks, and setting the bar for lyrical standards for everyone else. Having said that, it hasn't aged well - there is a lot of filler alongside the classics, and most of the tracks outstay their welcome.
p714. 1993. 2 stars Well produced but instantly forgettable pop fluff. It speaks volumes that the biggest hit on this is a cover. Not essential listening.
p223. 1971. 3.5 stars Classy 70s funk, the source of everything Prince went on to become. Close your eyes and you can see the flares and platform shoes. Points deducted for filler.
p860. 2000. 3 stars. Strays dangerously into ambient prog/rock wankage. Saved by a couple of good tunes and Thom Yorke's voice. Not their best work.
Listed as p916 in my edition of the book but! p916 has K.I.A by Mila! 2004. 3 stars. Oddly soulless pop-rock. Plenty of cracking tunes, and I feel I should like it more than I do, but Brandon Flowers voice puts me off. "I've got soul but I'm not a soldier". Yeah, and I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.
p787. 1996. 4 stars Classy ambient/electro pop with a great voice. 1 point deducted for some (most) of the tracks sounding the same.
p467. 1980. 5 stars A voice like Marmite, you either love it or hate it. I happen to love it. Great songs, great lyrics, great production, and he keeps it short and on point. What's not to like?
p883. 2002. 2 stars. Hip-hop/rap, so wrong audience. Well done of its type but no redeeming features.
p328. 1974. 3 stars. Classy but arch early 70s rock. Underneath the shiny chrome production there is a decent rock band trying to get out. A couple of stand out tunes, but too much filler to repay repeated listens. Brian May seems like quite a good guitarist.
p730. 1994. 2 stars. White frat-boy rap that hasn't aged well. Not my thing and goes on far too long for what it is, but well done of its kind and enough variety on it to make it worth listening to once.
p522. 1984. 2 stars. Distinctly average US band that can't make their minds up on whether they want to be The Clash or The Jam, but unfortunately lack the talent to be either. Not essential listening.
2004. Not in my edition of the book! 4 stars Icelandic Kate Bush, all the weirdness without the tunes. Oddly appealing to listen to, and she has got a good voice. Not for everyone, but well worth a listen.
p731. 1994. 3 stars. Well, there are some good tunes on this, and the production is excellent. Set against that are Morrissey's nasal drone of a voice, lyrics that frequently stray into self pity, and a neo-fascist attitude. Not much to like here.
p120. 1967. 4 stars A near perfect snapshot of mid 60s Brit rock/pop, and the reason why Ray Davies is up there with Lennon/McCartney, Dylan and Townsend. Packed with knowing and slightly fey pop gems, and lyrically it's as sharp as a stiletto. One point docked for the 60s production which sets it firmly of its time.
2021. Not in my edition of the book! 4 stars. Quality songs laced with longing and melancholy, lyrics on point and a gorgeous voice. The only thing missing are standout tunes. Not her best album, but worth a listen.
p913. 2006. 2 stars. Loud, obnoxious, shouty, average pub band that got lucky. Alex Turner's voice grates like chalk on a board - every time he opens his mouth I wanted to smack him to make him shut it. Bonus star for When The Sun Goes Down.
p784. 1996. 3 stars. Meandering, vaguely subversive, jazz-based instrumentals. Well done of its kind, but hardly essential.
p378. 1977. 3.5 stars. Shouty garage band with some decent tunes that got lucky - right time, right place. Incredibly influential at the time, but hasn't aged well and there is a lot of filler.
p284. 1972. 2 stars. Further evidence that the Stones are a great singles band and an average album band. There are no standout songs, lots of filler, and it sounds like it was mixed in a neglected aquarium.
p257. 1972. 4 stars. The only Steely Dan album you need. Standout tunes and quality musicianship, and it only occasionally strays into the jazz/rock wankage that they eventually succumbed to. All that is missing is a sense of excitement.
p298. 1973. 4 stars. Classy Brit glam rock that perfectly captures early 70s England. Camp, sharp and sardonic lyrics, some absolute pop gems, and it doesn't outstay its welcome.
p388. 1977. 3.5 stars. Strange but oddly attractive early alt rock effort. Came cold to this and was surprised how good it is. Points deducted for strained vocals and musical wankage - too many tracks >5 mins, and no-one needs a 10 minute+ track.
p372. 1976. 3 stars. Further evidence that Stevie Wonder makes great singles and so-so albums. This is far too long, falls into the trap of excessive 70s wankage on several tracks, and the production hasn't aged well. Don't get me wrong, there are some classics here, but they do show up the rest of the tracks as the filler that they are - a lot of this is simply bland. A bit of judicious editing and this could have been a 5 star single album.
p616. 1989. 4 stars. Manc based Brit pop that taps into 60s jangly guitars and psychedelia. Some classics in here, and fabulous bass playing, but a point deducted for filler, excessively long tracks and the unnecessary wankage that is Don't Stop.
p596. 1988. 1 star. The unwanted hatefuck children of Van Halen and Motorhead (Van Halen on the distaff side). Loud, tedious and totally redundant. No-one needs an album of heavy metal with each track over 5 minutes long. Remember 70s prog rock and the wankage associated with it? This is the 80s heavy metal equivalent. Dreadful, shouty noise. One star for the guitar work.
p733. 1994. 1.5 stars. Tedious Nirvana clones, but without the songs or the talent. Adequately done, but redundant and with no memorable songs, and far too long. WTF is this doing on the list?
p630. 1989. 2.5 stars Hip-hop/rap, so wrong audience. Well done of its kind though, and with a sense of humour. Well chosen samples, but unlikely to listen again.
p194. 1970. 3 stars. Definitive evidence that Creedence were a great singles band and made so-so albums. There are classics on here, all released as singles - but there is a LOT of filler, mostly redundant covers of Before You Accuse Me, Ooby Dooby, My Baby Left Me and the abomination that is I Heard It Through The Grapevine. Don't get me wrong, when this is good it's excellent, but when you have a songwriter as good as John Fogerty on top form there really is no excuse for this amount of lazy filler.
p419. 1978. 3 stars. The sound of a thousand late 1970s nightclubs. Dated, but still fabulous - if you can't dance to this you need an undertaker. As with all disco albums, out stays its welcome after 15 mins when played outside its native habitat.
Not in my edition of the book! 2003. 3.5 stars. Well done but distinctly average rock with a couple of good tunes. Nothing outstanding here.
p411. 1978. 3 stars. The inspiration for a thousand English kids to pick up a guitar in the late 70s, so points for that. Set against that are the dreadful nasal whine of Pete Shelley's voice and the lack of standout tunes. Bonus point for I Don't Mind.
p278. 1972. 4.5 stars. Class early 70s glam rock with a sense of humour, and which doesn't outstay its welcome. Suitably weird - big band jazz, opera and outstanding rockers - and it still sounds fresh today.
p283. 1972. 4 stars Prime slice of early 70s soul, with one of the great voices on absolute top form. Point deducted for dated production.
p41. 1959. 5 stars. One of THE great voices on absolute top form, with one of THE great arrangers, working together on one of THE great songwriters. What's not to like? Pure heaven.
p85. 1966. 5 stars. The moment 60s pop music grew up, crystalised in 36 perfect minutes. "This is the album of all time. What the hell are we (The Beatles) going to do?" - Paul McCartney after listening to Pet Sounds, 1966
p41. 1959. 3 stars. A collection of mostly redundant covers, saved only by THAT voice and the arrangements. Not his best work - see 'What'd I Say' for that.
p362. 1976. 2.5 stars Came cold to this, didn't dislike it but wasn't blown away by it either. Unlikely to listen to it again.
p773, 1996. 2.5 stars Average grunge band with some OK tunes. Well done of its kind, but nothing special and instantly forgettable.
Not in my edition of the book! 2004. 1 star. Pretentious, irritating, pointless noise. WTF is this shit doing this list, and who selected it?
p699. 1992. 4 stars. Nirvana clones with some decent tunes. Came cold to this and was pleasantly surprised. On the replay list.
p806. 1997. 2.5 stars So, someone learnt how to programme a drum machine. This hasn't dated well - 10 seconds of it and you are immediately in the late 90s - and twenty years on it sounds tedious and repetitive. Perhaps you had to be there at the time to enjoy it.
p287. 1973. 1 star. Cheesy 70s album of mostly shit covers. This is what they play during the intervals between acts in working man's clubs in Hell.
p631. 1989. 2 stars. Hip-hop/rap, so wrong audience. Listened to it once, don't remember anything about it.
p384. 1977. 5 stars. THE sound of late 70s white AOR in just under 39 perfect minutes, and it still sounds fresh today. There is not a weak track on this.
Not in my edition of the book! 2007. 3 stars. Came cold to this. Interesting, some good tunes in there. Points deducted for overly dramatic vocals and production which gets tiring reallll soon.
p676. 1991. 1.5 stars. Lumpy, plodding Spinal Tap for the 90s, but with an irony bypass. Definitive proof that one classic song does not make an essential album. Bonus point for Enter Sandman.
p609. 1989. 1.5 stars. Tedious electro disco, with no memorable tunes. WTF is this doing on this list?
p523. 1984. 2 stars. Self indulgent mismatch of styles and ideas - faux jazz, angry 80s Brit pop, and the abomination of failed white rap that is The Gospel. Don't get me wrong, there are a couple of Weller classics, but there are is far too much fat to repay repeated listens.
p589. 1988, 2.5 stars. Adequately done prototype Nirvana. Didn't sell well at the time, hasn't improved with age.
p831. 1998. 2.5 stars. Drum machine and hip-hop, so wrong audience, and it goes on for far too long without any standout songs. Set against that, she's got a great voice. Unlikely to listen to this again though.
p54. 1962. 3 stars. This really shouldn't work but... somehow it does. Points docked for the occasional saccharine over production and for being overly maudlin.
p404. 1978. 2.5 stars Punk, well done of its kind, sharp lyrics but the tracks tend to blur into the same loud noise. Very much of its time. Unlikely to listen to it again.
p1995. p772. 4.5 stars. The source of every neurotic female singer/songwriter since 1995. Sharp lyrics and cracking tunes. Half a point docked for the occasional grating harshness of her voice.
p791. 1996. 1 star. As rough as a bear's arse.
p232. 1971. 3 stars. Further evidence the lack of quality control post-Beatles. On the plus side, there are some stone cold classics. On the downside, it suffers from early 70s wankage (How Do You Sleep, I Don't Want To Be A Soldier), and the production makes most of the songs sound as if they're coated in syrup. This hasn't aged well, a bit like John. Sorry mate.
p72. 1964. 2.5 stars. Adequately done Brit 60s R&B, let down by the fact it's mostly covers, and none of them are an improvement on the originals. Probably on the list because of what they became, rather than the quality of this album.
Not in my edition of the book! 2005. 3.5 stars. Perfectly acceptable stripped down millennium rock. Not their best work - see The White Stripes or Elephant for that - but still good. 4 stars if you like their sound, 3 stars if you don't.
p57. 1962. 2.5 stars. Jazz/samba crossover, so wrong audience. Badly dated, close your eyes and you can smell the cigarette smoke and pineapple and cheese on sticks from a million pre-Beatles cocktail parties. Perfectly acceptable, just not my thing. "Nice" - The Fast Show
p137. 1968. 2 stars. Not sure what to make of this. She's got a decent voice, but it's set to "belt it out as loud as I can mode" more often than not. There are no standout tracks, and the 60s production veers too close to showtunes. Carole King did this type of thing far better.
p613. 1989. 3 stars. White boy hip/hop/rap, so wrong audience. Having said that... actually quite enjoyed it. Not sure I'd revisit though.
p698. 1992. 1 star. Shit-hop. Foul mouthed, violent, macho posturing, misogynistic and badly dated rubbish. Sample lyrics: fuck, hoe, fuck y'all, motherfucker, nigga, suck my dick, bitch. Repeat per track.
p870, 2000. 1.5 stars. Rap, so the wrong audience. The usual tedious rants about motherfuckers, banana niggas, gangsta shit, blowjobs, blunts, hoes, punk pussy ass bitches and pussy wreckers. Bonus half star for Ms.Jackson, but otherwise this got boring reallll soon.
p534. 1985. 1.5 stars. Poor man's Pogues, out of tune, no decent songs and with a worse voice than Shane MacGowan. Bonus star for keeping it short.
Not in my edition of the book! 2019. 3 stars. Well done indie soul-rock, but lacking standout songs. Not sure it is essential listening.
p362. 1976. 2 stars. The epitome of 70s prog-rock wankage. Nobody needs a 20 minute+ opening track. And Geddy Lee sounds like his testicles have yet to drop. Bonus point for the musicianship, even if it is devoid of emotion.
p685. 1992. 2.5 stars Loud and angry rock/rap fusion. When they discover how to write a tune they'll be quite good. Well done, but a bit too shouty for my tastes.
p726. 1994. 4.5 stars. Strange, surreal and bitter-sweet aural experience, like the soundtrack from a lost David Lynch adaption of Alice in Wonderland. Just when you think it's getting too pretentious it comes up like a stone cold classic like Sour Times or Glory box. And Beth Gibbon's voice is a thing of beauty.
Not in my edition of the book! 2002. 3 stars Very much a mixed bag of covers and a handful of originals. The trick with covers is to add something to the original and ideally make yours the definitive version, and that doesn't happen for a lot of the songs here. However - when it does, such as on Hurt - then the results are fantastic. Worth the entry fee just for a Cash original, "The Man Comes Around".
p166. 1969. 3 stars. Perfectly acceptable and slightly twee 60s English folk, close your eyes and you can almost smell the patchouli oil and incense. Bonus points for quality musicianship and Jacqui McShee's ethereal voice. And as with most 60s albums, it doesn't outstay its welcome.
p307. 1973. 2 stars Average 70s Brit-rock album from an average Brit rock band with a frontman channelling his inner Tim Curry. They weren't really successful at the time, and this is perfect evidence of why - no real standout tunes, and the usual 70's rock wankage with 7+ minute songs. I suspect this is on the list because of memories of what a good live act they were.
p282. 1972. 2 stars. Not my thing. No standout songs, and no-one needs multiple meandering 8+ minute tracks.
p382. 1977. 3.5 stars Musically there's lots to like here - new wave meets dance - but I can't be doing with David Byrne's voice, he sounds like he has a hernia. On the plus side, its short. Bonus point for Psycho Killer.
p344. 1975. 2 stars. Springsteen on Prozac. On the plus side, it's short and it's in tune.
p920. 2008. 4 stars. CSN/John Phillips hybrid for the new millennium, which isn't a bad thing. Missing standout tunes but still good. On the replay list.
p418. 1978. 2.5 stars Well done Aussie punk, with some decent tunes and added horns. Probably fantastic at the time, but sounds dated now. Not on the replay list.
p114. 1967. 3 stars. The perfect response to the Summer of Love, and very much a mixed bag. There are some stone cold classics on this (Venus In Furs, I'm Waiting For The Man) and it was hugely influential on late 70s punk/new wave. Set against that is a lot of filler - European Son is just noise - and Nico can't sing. Still worth a listen after 50+ years/
Not in my edition of the book! 2003. 4 stars. One of the best debut albums ever made, and a perfect commentary on the early Millennium ladette culture. Great tunes, sharp lyrics, and THAT voice. What's not to like?
p691. 1992. 1 star Another shit hip-hop/rap album. Wannabe Beastie Boys but without any talent.
p541. 1983. 3 stars. U2 before they became flabby and self righteous. 1 point docked for Bono's near-hysterical vocals.
p454. 1980. 3.5 stars. You have to be in the right mood for this, but if you are, it's the only other punk album you need.
p342. 1975. 2 stars Just because it's Bowie doesn't mean it's good. Great production and vocally he's on point, but there is a lot of filler, very few standout songs, and it suffers from the usual mid-70's excessive track lengths. In addition, the cover of Across The Universe is an abomination. "Ain't there one damn song that can make me break down and cry". Not on this album.
p227. 1971. 4.5 stars, THE template for every female singer-songwriter that came after. Half a point deducted for dated production, .but those songs still sound great 50 years on.
Not in my edition of the book! 2009. 3 stars. Bjork clone, which is either a good or bad thing depending on your tastes. Bonus point for opening with the theme song from "Vikings".
Not in my edition of the book. 2004. 3 stars. I was quite prepared to dislike this - I don't care for Morrissey's singing or his views - but its actually quite good. Decent tunes and some sharp lyrics, offset by the usual self pitying/self-loathing you expect from the miserable Mancunian racist.
p428. 1979. 4.5 stars Quality Brit New Wave. Definitive proof that Sting can knock out a tune with the best of them, and that Stewart Copeland was a surprisingly decent songwriter. Half a point deducted for Sting's annoying cod-Caribbean vocals.
p90. 1966. 3.5 stars. Classy folk-rock harmonies that stray dangerously into middle of the road easy listening. When it's good, its excellent - California Dreaming is a classic - but a lot of the time it's just bland.
p58. 1962. 2 stars. Old time country and western, marinated in cigarette smoke and the bottom of a glass. OK for a couple of tracks and then gets depressing.
p859. 2000. 4 stars. Foul mouthed white boy rap which usually would be an immediate nope, but this is good. At its best it's articulate, incisive, funny, and has some great riffs. Point deducted for usual racist, sexist and homophobic lyrics that come with the genre.
p620. 1989. 4.5 stars. Brilliant all rounder shows how it should be done - there are more ideas and invention here than most artists manage in an entire career. And This Woman's Work is possibly the best song she's ever written. Half a point docked for getting a little bit saggy around the rear, but its still fabulous. A bit like Kate :)
p132. 1968. 1 star. 60s folk addled by too many magic mushrooms. Meandering, tuneless songs, pretentious lyrics, and a vocalist singing flatter than a witch's tit. And it has a random sitar and a kazoo. This is an absolute clusterfuck of an album. Avoid. "Never trust a hippy" - John Lyndon
p740. 1994. 3 stars Well done angry she-grunge, some sharp and hard delivery. Missing standout tunes though.
p297. 1973. 1 star. A double album of tedious hippy German electronica with +10 minute tracks? Fuck no.
p286. 1973. 2.5 stars. Well done Southern state rock, but suffering from the usual early 70s wankage. No-one needs 9+ minute tracks, not even Freebird. They seem like quite good guitarists though.
p785. 1996. 2 stars Bland background music for hipster bars with no standout tunes. I hate this sanitised, washed out "R&B" with a loathing that goes beyond all understanding. Bonus point for classy production.
Not in my edition of the book! 2002. 2 stars. Average millennial Britpop with no redeeming features. Played it once, can't remember any songs from it.
p356. 1976. 4.5 stars Schizophrenic blend of electronica, white boy soul and hard rock with some quality tunes thrown in. Shouldn't work, but somehow it does. Point deducted for the usual 70s wankage - no-one needs a Bowie track that is 10+ minutes long - but half a point bonus for the best ever cover of Wild Is The Wind.
p580. 1987. 3 stars Well, there's no denying he could knock out a tune - this is packed with hits - and Man In The Mirror is possibly the best thing he did. Vocally he's on top form, but set against that is the dated production and an awful lot of filler. And I can't shake off the embarrassment of listening to music made by a child molester.
p263. 1972. 1 star. The epitome of 70s prog rock wankage. Pretentious, tedious musical noodling, technically proficient but with all the soul of a ring wraith of Mordor. An 18 minute opening track? Fuck no.
p856. 2000. 3.5 stars Decent enough background music, with no standout tunes. Worth a replay though.
p847. 1999. 4 stars. Immediately accessible sampling album, and the background music to a million adverts. Point deducted for loss of freshness, but that's what you get for licensing your music to anyone who thinks it would be cool as the soundtrack for their car or perfume ad.
p538. 1985. 5 stars. Her best album. Flawless.
p842, 1999. 3 stars. Well done but distinctly average 90s metal. Desperately want to be Nirvana but lack the talent.
p615. 1989. 1 star Intolerable and unremittingly violent jazz improvisation. My ears are bleeding.
p153. 1968. 4 stars Quality 60s Brit pop that hits the sweet spot between The Beatles and The Beach Boys. Gorgeous arrangements, quality songs, and Colin Blunstone has a wonderful voice. All that is missing is a sense of excitement.
p339. 1975. 2 stars. Led Zep at their flabbiest. A double album of mostly average songs, with the decent ones victim to the usual mid-70s +5 minute rock wankage of the time. A bit of judicious editing and this could have a half decent single album.
p135. 1968. 2 stars. Well, that was weird, and not in a good way.
p258. 1972. 5 stars. Quality early 70s singer/songwriter on top form. Not a weak track on this. Short, sweet and on point.
p518. 1984. 2 stars. Bland background faux jazz/soul for 80s cocktail bars. Shiny production can't compensate for the mostly average songs, or the complete lack of emotion or passion in any of them. Most of the time Sade sounds like she is either bored or on Prozac. Hard to imagine that this was the soundtrack to a thousand Yuppie seductions.
p690. 1992. 5 stars. Perfect. And Nightswimming is possibly the greatest song ever written.
p124. 1967. 2.5 stars Well done but average 60s rock pop. One classic single does not make for essential listening before you die.
p566. 1987. 3.5 stars. Quality jangly 80s guitar with some great songs and quite a bit of filler. Not their best work - see Automatic For The People for that - but still good.
Not in my edition of the book! 2019. 2 stars. Average and occasionally foul mouthed (c)rap. Bonus point for the couple of decent tunes on it like Selfish and Venom. Probably only on the list because she's black, female and British. Not essential listening.
p851. 1999. 1.5 stars Average electronic dance album with zero redeeming features. Background music for every sticky carpeted backstreet student club. Bonus point for Red Alert.
p107. 1967. 2.5 stars Average 60s pop album from an average 60s pop group. A couple of standout tunes, but there is a lot of filler. On the plus side, it is short.
p758. 1995. 1.5 stars. Starts off with the usual tedious, toxic masculinity driven, foul mouthed, misogynistic (c)rap, changes to decent lyrics with some serious points to make before returning to type on "Fuck The World" and "Death Around The Corner". In addition a lot of the tracks sound the same and just bleed into each other. There are better ways to spend 1 hour and 5 minutes of your life than listening to this.
p74. 1964. 5 stars. I'm not a fan of live albums, but this is terrifyingly good - early 60s raw musical energy, captured into a perfect 37 mins (YouTube version).
Not in my edition of the book. 2001. 3 stars. Well done, but lacking standout tracks and strays dangerously into prog rock wankage. Not their best work by any means - who selected this for the 1001 albums list?
p535. 1985. 2 stars. Average 80s singer-songwriter with teenage angst lyrics, shiny production and quality guitar work. One standout track, but otherwise it's nothing exceptional - too many tracks sound the same, and it hasn't dated well. On the plus side it's short.
p858. 2000. 2 stars. Brazilian Sade for the new millennium. Bland background music for Ibiza hipster bars.
p68. 1964. 2 stars. Well done of its type, but definitely not my thing.
Not in my edition of the book! 2004. 5 stars. Quality, edgy Brit indie pop. Cracking tunes, sharp lyrics - what's not to like?
p697. 1992. 1 star. The usual foul mouthed tedious (c)rap. Sample lyrics: fuck, nigga, motherfucker, shit, bitch, whore. No thanks.
p680. 1992. 1.5 stars. Better than the average foul-mouthed (c)rap/hip-hop of the time. Well done of its kind but still not my thing at all.
p147. 1968. 4 stars. Quality 60s folk-pop, infused with melancholy and only let down by the amount of filler on it. When it's good it's very good indeed, and Paul Simon is an underrated guitarist.
p290. 1973. 3 stars. Well done of its kind and some decent tunes, but reggae just leaves me cold. On the plus side, its short.
p366. 1976. 2 stars. Sounds like the incidental music from failed BBC sitcoms of the 1970s. Background noise for cheese and wine parties. Technically well done, but insipid and dull.
p112. 1967. 1 star. This might have been tolerable if you were out of your head on a decent tab of LSD. As it is, it's just twee 60's hippy noodling.
p327. 1974. 2 stars. Sharp lyrics that are still relevant today, let down by meandering jazz improv with no trace of a tune. Not essential listening.
p529. 1985. 4 stars. Anthems for 80s American blue collar workers. Packed with hits, there is only one weak track on this ("Bobby Jean") and the lyrics are a direct counterpoint to the hope of "Born To Run". Not his best work, but still pretty damn good. Point deducted for dated 80s production and synths. "I'm ten years burning down the road / Nowhere to run, ain't got nowhere to go"
p354, 1975. 2 stars. Well done of its kind without being remotely memorable, and it hasn't aged well - 30 seconds in and you're immediately transported to a world of long hair, sideburns, purple flared trousers and platform shoes. On the plus side, it's short.
p176. 1969. 3 stars. Adequate Brit blues/folk/rock blend, a couple of standout tracks and a lot of overly long filler. Bonus point for 'fessing up to losing his girl to Gollum.
p118, 1967. 4 stars. Quality 60's West Coast folk-rock that's aged really well. Point deducted for the filler, but this shows why they could have been contenders.
p838. 1998. 1 star. Foul mouthed white rap without the humour or intelligence of Eminem. Tedious, shouty noise. Why the fuck is this on the list?
p500. 1982. 2 stars. Well done of its type, but heavy metal leaves me cold, and Bruce Dickinson sounds like he has a hernia.
p389. 1977. 5 stars. Bombastic, overproduced rock opera with a genuine sense of humour and cracking tunes. Love it.
p541. 1985. 1.5 stars. Annoying and whiny Mancs discover dance music and synths. They only have two songs, and they are spread very thinly over 40 minutes. And Bernard Sumner cannot sing. At least it is short.
p815. 1997. 2 stars. Terrific voice let down by sub-par material. This is just bland background music for dinner parties.
p518. 1984. 3 stars. Got to admit, the Cocteau Twins are one of my musical blind spots. I can appreciate the musicianship and they have some decent songs, but I find Liz Frazer's voice shrill and grating after a couple of tracks. And it's all a bit... soulless. Well done though.
Not in my edition of the book! 2013. 4 stars. I tended not to listen to late Bowie albums, something I regret now. This was the first time I've heard this, and it's excellent - all it is missing is a standout singles track. Wasn't expecting it to be this good. Definitely on the replay list.
p808. 1997. 1.5 stars. Well done but... average. Boring. Bland. Who picked this for the list?
p589. 1988. 1 star. Spinal Tap with an irony bypass. WTF is this doing on the list?
p137. 1968. 5 stars. Not a fan of live albums, but this one hits the sweet spot. Great songs, great voice, great atmosphere.
p833. 1998. 2.5 stars. Twee trippy psychedelic pop with fey vocals and one standout song (Goddess On A Highway). Other than that, this gets tiresome and pretentious reallll soon.
p116. 1967. 4 stars. Astonishing debut, a weird combination of jazz, blues, psychedelic pop and theatre rock that somehow works. Point deducted for the excessive mid 60s wankage, and the occasionally dated production and arrangements
p162. 1969. 4 stars. Not as good as "At Fulsom Prison" - there is some definite filler here - but it's still fine. Makes you realise how good Cash was in his heyday.
p922. 2008. 2.5 stars. Not their best work - see "Dummy" for that - and it lacks any standout tunes and descends into noise very quickly.
p505. 1983. 3.5 stars. Not their best work - see Automatic For The People for that - but this good stuff, jangly guitars and some cracking tunes let down by filler and obscure lyrics.
p539. 1985. 3 stars. Never cared for The Smiths - they are a musical blind spot for me - but this is good. Johnny Marr is a guitar genius. Points deducted for Morrisey's nasal whine and "oh woe is me" lyrics.
p164. 1969. 5 stars. More ideas and creativity in 47 minutes than most bands manage in an entire career. Half a point docked for excessive wankage on "Oh Darling" and "I Want You (She's So Heavy)", but bonus half a point for the incredible song cycle on side 2.
p205. 1970. 2.5 stars. So! This is the genesis of all those 70s heavy metal bands! Well of its kinds but suffers from ridiculous lyrics and excessive early 70s wankage. Nobody needs multiple tracks >7 minutes long, regardless of how well or fast you can play.
p492. 1982. 2 stars. Evidence - if it was needed - that Madness were a great singles band, but lacked the talent for a full length album. And to be honest the pub piano, cheesy sax and Camden accents get wearing after a couple of tracks.
p102. 1967. 2 stars. Pointless hippy-trippy noodling with no redeeming features.
p519. 1983. 2 stars. Foulmouthed, shouty proto Green Day without the tunes - "Cashing In" could well be a Green Day discard. Already 5 years behind the curve when it was issued. Curiosity value only.
p279. 1972. 3 stars. Classy early 70s Motown, let down by filler and redundant covers. When it's good, it's very good indeed.
p520. 1984. 4 stars. Almost perfect. There are some classics on this - it's just let down by dated 80s synths and filler tracks.
p311. 1973. 3.5 stars. Quality early 70s soul, let down by filler, redundant covers and the usual 70s excessive wankage - but when it's good, it's brilliant. Ernie Isley is an unsung guitar legend, and Summer Breeze may be one of the greatest songs ever.
p577. 1987. 3.5 stars. Extremely well done and pleasant to listen to, but not my thing at all. Glad I heard it once, but unlikely to listen to it again.
p753. 1994. 1 stars. Utterly redundant shouty punk rock that is 15 years too late. Why is this below average shit even on the list?
p363. 1976. 3.5 stars. Classy mid 70s Brit singer-songwriter with a fabulous voice. All that's missing are standout tracks - if everything was as good as "Love And Affection", it would be 5 stars.
p410. 1978. 2 stars. There are some half decent tracks here, and Brian Eno's production is fantastic - but I can't be doing with David Byrne's voice, he sounds like a dog with its leg caught in barbed wire.
p440. 1979. 1 star. Unpleasant proto Franz Ferdinand, but without the talent or tunes. Not much to like here.
Not in my edition of the book! 2005. 4 stars. Gorgeous voice and production, and tracks infused with melancholy. The only things missing are more standout tracks.
p932. 2012. 4 stars. Came cold to this and was pleasantly surprised - quality harmonies and tunes. Sounds like Brian Wilson's hipster grandkids discovering surf rock and LSD. On the replay list.
p178. 1969. 3.5 stars. So this is where Prince stole his sound from! Quality late 60s soul-funk-rock hybrid. Still sounds fresh today. Points docked for the usual late 60s wankage on some tracks - no-one needs a 13 minutes+ guitar workout on "Sex Machine".
p559. 1986. 5 stars. One of THE great soul voices on absolutely top form. This is fabulous.
p572. 1987. 2 stars. Average garage band that desperately wants to be REM, but lack the talent or songs. Nothing of interest here. Why is this even on the list?
p627, 1989. 3 stars. Music for US midwest roadside bars. Well done country/rock, but lacking standout tunes.
p495. 1982. 3 stars. Mad as a sack of frogs. This is Kate in her most screechy and oddest phase, with one of her worst songs (There Goes A Tenner) and the entire album switches from genre to genre like a hyperactive child with attention deficit disorder. And yet, and yet... strangely accessible. Bit like Kate :)
p704. 1993. 4 stars The lost children of Ziggy Stardust. There are some cracking tunes in here - point deducted for a saggy middle section (bit like Brett Anderson) and his voice which gets annoying after a while.
p764. 1995. 1 star. Probably fine if you like meandering Afrobeat noodling. I don't.
p824. 1998. 2.5 stars. The singles are great, the rest... mostly filler. And it gets tedious reaal soon. 3 stars on a good day.
p901. 2004. 3 stars. Starts off sounding like the council estate offspring of Jilted John, and the drum machine gets tedious reallll soon. And yet... somehow it turns it round with the last couple of tracks. "Dry Your Eyes" is a thing of beauty.
p373. 1977. 4 stars. Sounds like Talking Heads on a good day. Startling good production, let down by a lack of standout tracks. One for the hi-fi purists :)
p183. 1969. 3 stars. Fabulous production, and one of the great soul voices on top form. Set against that are excessively long tracks - 12+ minute workout on "Walk On By" and a 9+ "intro" to "By The Time I Get To Phoenix". There is a reason there were single versions of both of these. When it's good, its very good indeed.
p34. 1957. 2 stars. Jazz, so the wrong audience. Seems well done of its type, though. Unlikely to replay this.
p125. 1967. 3 stars. Tremendous voice and some great songs, let down by a lot of filler and a surfeit of steel guitars. Yeehaw.
p439. 1979. 5 stars. Brilliant all-rounder shows how it should be done. There is not a weak track on this. Perfect.
p345. 1975. 3 stars. Great voice, great lyrics and a sense of humour, but there are no tunes to speak of and I'm not a fan of cocktail bar jazz.
p904. 2004. 5 stars. A glorious trash from start to finish. There is not a weak track on this.
p870. 2000. 1 star. Tedious sampling album that detracts from the original songs, intercut with random, annoying, out of tune sound bites. WTF is this shit doing on the list?
p338. 1975. 2 stars. Bland, pointless mostly instrumental noodling. Bonus star for the production.
p838. 1998. 1 star. Foul mouthed, obnoxious, unpleasant and distinctly average heavy metal/rap fusion. This hurt my ears. "You hate me/And I hate you". Yup, about right.
p408. 1978. 2 stars. Well done of its kind, but wrong audience. Also subject to the usual late 70's wankage.
p130. 1968. 3 stars. Evidence that the Stones were once a decent blues/rock band. When it's good it's very good indeed, but there is a LOT of filler.
p430. 1979. 2 stars. Not their best work by means, but worth a listen if you enjoy sardonic Mancs in late 70s/early Thatcher era.
p678. 1992. 1 star. Average garage band with no tunes. Why is this even on the list?
p451. 1980. 3 stars. The good: fabulous brass section and a handful of good songs. The bad: Kevin Rowland's vocals. He can't sing and he has the worst articulation ever. It speaks volumes (unlike Kevin Rowland) that Spotify doesn't know most of the lyrics to the songs, probably because no-one can understand WTF he is saying.
p947. 2017. 1 star. Tedious electro dance that desperately wants to be Bowie, but lacks both the talent and the songs. And too many of the tracks descend into wankage - no-one needs a 12+ minute final track. WTF is this doing on the list?
p357. 1976. 4 stars. Quality late 70s American pomp rock with fabulous production, fabulous vocals and some great songs. Points deducted for the usual 70s wankage, but a bonus point for being the source of "Smells Like Teen Spirit".
Not in my edition of the book! 2002. 3 stars. Well, she's got a great set of pipes, and there are a handful of good songs on this - but there is also a LOT of filler. Better quality control and this could have been a 5 - as it is, it goes on far too long.
p710. 1993. 3 stars. Decent voice and lyrics let down by a lack of memorable tunes. Interesting rather than essential.
p579. 1987. 3 stars. Noisy bridge between punk and grunge. Well done of its kind but no redeeming features.
p599. 1988. 4 stars. There are some cracking tunes and lyrics here, even if most of them are about self loathing and despair. And I can't give 5 stars to any depressive racist Manc.
p480. 1981. 3 stars Strangely alluring mix of garage band, punk and quality 60s influences (Creedence, The Doors), let down by a lack of quality songs. Worth a listen though.
p725. 1994. 1 star. Desperately average garage band with no tunes and a vocalist that can't sing. Most of this is just noise. WTF is on the list?
p826. 1998. 4.5 stars. Sounds like Sheryl Crow's older and arguably more talented sister :) Great voice, great lyrics and songs. Half a point deducted for the occasional lapse into yeehaw.
p509. 1983. 2 stars. Pales in comparison to his best work. Average at best, and there is a LOT of filler. Bonus point for "Johnny Ace".
p708. 1993. 3.5 stars. Sounds like Courtney Love's younger, pissed off sister, which ain't a bad thing. Came to this cold and was surprised how much I liked it. All it's missing are standout tunes.
p165. 1969. 3 stars. Pros: well, they knew how to knockout a tune, and the production is excellent. Cons: suspect lyrics - something they never sorted throughout their long career - Robin Gibb's voice (the equivalent of vocal jelly) and a complete lack of any musical direction or coherence. It's a mess, but worth listening to.
p660. 1991. 1 star. French rap. Non.
p409. 1978. 4 stars. Not a fan of live or double albums, but this is an exception. A greatest hits set from one of the best live bands ever. Point deducted for the occasional lapse into late 70's wankage - no-one needs 7+ minute tracks or extended drum solos.
p642. 1990. 3 stars. Average rock band with some decent tunes, but lyrically inept. You can hear the influence on Nirvana, it's just that Kurt Cobain did it better :)
p869. 2000. 2 stars. Sounds like the original cast recording from a failed Edinburgh Fringe musical. Massively disappointing when you consider the song writing talent (Tom Waits, Nick Cave, Elvis Costello). And she has an annoyingly strident voice. Bonus point for being in tune.
p69. 1964. 4 stars. One of the THE great soul voices on peak form, let down by some sub-par material. When it's good, it's brilliant.
p770. 1995. 4 stars. THE sound of Britain in the early 90s, and a decent Beatles clone to counter Blur's Kinks imitation. Some great songs here, fabulous production, and Liam Gallagher sings like a bastard. Point deducted for suspect lyrics, filler ("The Swamp Song"), and the obvious thefts from Slade, Gary Glitter and T.Rex.
p669. 1991. 2 stars. Well done of its type, but there is nothing here that hasn't been done before and better by Motorhead.
Not in my edition of the book! 2002. 1 star. Redundant bland pop songs from a bland pop group, with one song used for a car advert. Utterly forgettable. WTF is this doing on the list?
Not in my edition of the book! 1999. 2 stars. Average rock band with average songs, partially offset by (mostly) excellent vocals. Not much to like here.
p550. 1986. 3 stars. Inoffensive 80's country album. Lovely voice and some classy songs, but strays in yeehaw too often and there's a lot of filler.
p276. 1972. 3 stars. Inventive and schizophrenic debut that epitomises early 70s Brit Glam/Art rock. Points deducted for the dated sound - one track and you can immediately picture long hair, glitter, platform shoes and flares - and for Bryan Ferry's voice, which is an acquired taste.
p922. 2008. 5 stars. Fabulous Brit alt rock tinged with melancholy and gentle humour. There is not weak track on this.
p951. p207. 3 stars. Well done but average millennium "R&B". Decent voice and explicit lyrics do not make for essential listening.
p326. 1974. 5 stars. Magnificent 70s Brit folk rock. Great vocals, great guitar work. Not a weak track on this.
p900. 2004. 4 stars. This is what you get if you splice the DNA of Scott Walker and Thom Yorke. Great voice, sharp lyrics with a dark sense of humour, and you have to admire the sheer variety of styles handled on the album. All that's missing are standout tracks.
p892. 2003. 1 star. Rap/grime, so wrong audience. It's tedious beyond belief, and the Cockney accent makes this almost unbearable. Difficult to give any stars to someone who thinks it's OK to assault women.
p923. 2012. 2 stars. Formulaic, bland, uninspired plastic high pitched vocal "R&B". Background music when shopping at Monsoon. Big Joe Turner must be turning in his grave.
p664. 1991. 1 star. Rap, so wrong audience. All the usual tedious, macho, misogynistic foul mouthed cliches. Might have been fresh and shocking at the time, now it just sounds dated and obnoxious. And at 1hr 12m it outstays its welcome reaaaaall soon.
p62. 1963. 3 stars. Pros: THAT voice, and some great material. Cons: I'm not a fan of live albums. And strangely... it all felt a bit artificial... and dare I say it, soulless?
p333. 1974. 2 stars. Technically excellent but ultimately soulless music for aged hipsters. It's the aural equivalent of a Ring Wraith. And they use a goddam awful electric piano, its a major part of their sound. On the plus side, it's short, even if it seems to go on forever. Bonus point for Rikki Don't Lose That Number.
p345. 1975. 2 stars. Weird selection. Schizophenric Indian film score that pilfers from multiple music genres. Well done, but why is this on the list? It feels like an afterthought - "better have some Bollywood in there, but make it accessible." And for those with an interest in the actual plot of the film: On the run from the police, Kumar, a thief, comes across a private invitation to the island of Sir John Locksley addressed to Raja Bahadur Singh. When the Raja is shot, Kumar takes him to a nearby hospital, dons a Sikh's turban, poses as the Raja's son and goes to the private island of John, where he finds all the other invitees are master criminals and gangsters. Kumar's guise does not fool anyone, including his former sweetheart, Sheila Enders who is oddly also on the island. Nevertheless Sir John permits him to stay on, as he feels that Kumar's career, though an amateur, is consistent with those already present. The reason why John has invited them is to find a successor to take his place as he is dying of cancer. He feels that one of his invitees can be trusted to take his place and for this he has arranged for them to steal a diamond (shalimar) worth one hundred thirty-five crores of rupees. This gem is placed in a secure place within his palace, which is alarmed, and guarded by armed men twenty-four hours a day. He challenges one of them to steal the shalimar, but if anyone fails then he or she is killed instantly. Pitted against such veterans, it looks like Kumar has gotten himself into a bind out of which he may not come out in one piece.
p70. 1964. 3 stars. The source of all white female blue eyed soul. Mostly covers, and the production is horribly dated - but that's offset by THAT voice. When this is good it's excellent. Better quality control on the material and this could easily have been a 4 or a 5. When this is good it's excellent.
p37. 1958. 2 stars Guaranteed to make any hip twitch. Well done of its kind, but not my thing. Unlikely to revisit.
p205. 1970. 4 stars Quality Celtic soul, still sounds fresh today. Great vocals, fabulous horn section, all that's missing are more standout songs.
p464. 1980. 4 stars. Prototype Green Day. Short, sweet and wonderful punk-pop hybrid, let down by filler and a totally redundant cover. When it's good it's terrific.
p597. 1988. 1 star. Noisy, repetitive and redundant late 80s US indie rock. Each trac sounds the same, and the vocalist has an annoying nasal whine. Not much to like here.
p181. 1969. 1 star. Frankenstein-esque blend of jazz and rock for stoned hippies - farting horns, squealing guitars and cowbells. No-one needs multiple 5 minute+ tracks of repetitive guitar noodling, regardless of how well it is done. And "Free Form Guitar" is wankage of the first order. Thank God for punk.
p880. 2001. 1 star (C)rap. Usual tedious, macho, misogynistic, foul mouthed nonsense. Bonus point for the production values and the obvious theft from Issac Hayes on the opener. Sample "lyrics": "Nigga's kidnap your babies/Spit on your lady/We bring knife to a fistfight/Kill your drama/We kill you motherfucking ants with a sledgehammer".
p603. 1988. 1 star, Shouty American guitar rock with no tunes, a whiny lead vocalist, and nothing much to say. "It's just corporate dick rock. It's Van Halen with different makeup artists." - Dave Barbe.
p581. 1987. 3 stars. Proof - if it were needed - that the Pet Shop Boys were a great singles band, but lacked the talent for a decent album. And it's dreadfully dated, darlings. Bonus points for "Rent" and the Dusty Springfield cameo.
p739, 1994. 2 stars. Pleasant enough world music/blues crossover, and some great guitar work from Ry Cooder - but ultimately it's bland background noise.
p565. 1987. 3 stars. Well done collection of country standards, and gorgeous harmonies. Having said that, it is mostly a covers album.
p893. 2003. 4 stars. Fabulous stripped down guitar rock with some great tunes, that doesn't take itself too seriously. Point deducted for the redundant Dusty Springfield cover.
p320. 1974. 3 stars. Well, the voice is great, and the lyrics are sharp - but there are no standout tunes, and the production has NOT dated well. Without the voice this would be soulless mid 70s West Coast FM listening.
p724. 1994. 1 star. Average garage band with average songs. WTF is this doing on the list? On the plus side, it's short.
p743. 1994. 4 stars. Quality 90s Brit-pop spliced with Bowie Glam rock. Point deducted for excessive track wankage, and it does outstay its welcome.
Not in my edition of the book! 2014. 2 stars. The aural equivalent of a hipster non-alcoholic craft beer.
p756. 1995. 1 star. Not going to lie, this is the first album on the list that I gave up trying to listen all the way through. Tedious, foul mouthed garbage from guttersnipes. It's fucking horrible.
p915. 2007. 5 stars. Difficult to fault this, great songs, great vocals, great production. Not a weak track on this.
Not in my edition of the book! 1994. 1 star. Tedious Brit electro music that wants to be Vangelis when it grows up. No-one needs multiple meandering tracks >5 minutes long. Why is this even on the list?
Not in my edition of the book! 2003. 3 stars. Perfectly acceptable, but not their best work by any means. Why is this on the list when there are already 4 other Radiohead albums on it, and even the band think this is one of their weaker efforts?
p549. 1986. 2 stars (just) Angry but average 80s Brit synth band that wanted to be Heaven 17. No memorable tunes, and the production has not aged well. No idea why this is on the list.
p121. 1967. 2 stars. 60's hippy-trippy nonsense, saved from a one star review by a couple of good tunes. I imagine that at the time, with a decent summer, a tab of LSD and a liberated hippy chick, this would have been fabulous. As it is, it's as faded as meadow wildflowers in autumn.
p534. 1985. 1 star. Weedy, pretentious, soulless 80s UK hipster pop. Wants to be The Style Council but lacks any edge and tunes. Extra point deducted for the stupid band name.
p692. 1992. 1 star. Tedious electro space rock. The bastard love child of the Stone Roses and Brian Eno, but without the quality or talent of either. This just goes on and on and on...
p454. 1980. 3 stars Surfer/rockabilly/punk hybrid with a love of B-movie tropes and sense of humour. Points deducted for the lack of variety and the redundant covers.
p598. 1988. 4 stars. Strangely alluring country/jazz hybrid, matched with a fabulous voice. Terrific production, and it rarely strays into yee-haw. Perfect late evening music.
p356. 1976. 2 stars. The bastard new wave children of The Velvet Underground. At the time this was revolutionary - a whole generation realised that if these guys could pick up a guitar and make a record, so could they. Having said that, this hasn't aged well, and it has too much filler - one classic track does not make for an album of essential listening. Additional points deducted for Jonathan Richman's nasal whine.
p925. 2009. 2 stars. Unremarkable power pop with no standout tunes. Perfectly acceptable, but not essential listening in any way.
p635. 1990. 2.5 stars (3 on a good day). Decent Brit electro-dance, with a couple of standout tracks. Needs a tab to be fully appreciated. Not essential listening, but worth a spin.
p526. 1984. 1 star. Double album of mediocre demos from an average garage band with no tunes. WTF is this doing on the list?
p933. 2012. 2 stars. Insipid Brit electro pop. Well done of its kind, but totally unremarkable, and it definitely outstays its welcome. Not essential listening.
p651. 1990. 2 stars. Rap/hip-hop, so wrong audience. Well done of its kind but... meh.
p551. 1986. 1 star. Tedious generic heavy metal with no redeeming features and a vocalist who can't sing. Additional point deducted for the utterly redundant cover of I Ain't Superstitious. Willie Dixon must be rotating in his grave.
p373. 1977. 3 stars. The source of every 80s synth/sequencer band that followed. Still sound fresh today, but it does outstay its welcome. Additional point deducted for excessive wankage - no-one needs multiple 6+ minute tracks.
p731. 1994. 4 stars. Classy 90s US R&B done right, and the source of a host of mostly poor imitations (Spice Girls, All Saints, Destiny's Child, Sugababes). To what heights could they have aspired if they hadn't gone bust and burnt down their boyfriend's house?
p766. 1995. 5 stars. Quality 90s Brit-pop with sharp lyrics, great tunes and a sense of humour. What's not to like?
p168. 1969. 4 stars. Startlingly good Brit folk. Vague echoes of the more melancholy tracks on Love's "Forever Changes", which ain't a bad thing. Point deducted for the occasional production lapse into saccharine.
p469. 1980. 2 stars. Pros: one of the great white soul voices on show. One great song. Cons: dated 80s production, and a lot of filler. No-one needs multiple tracks >5+ minutes.
p488. 1982. 1 star. The Cure make great singles, but this is a self indulgent mess of noise. Avoid.
Not in my edition of the book! 1997. 3 stars. Album 500 from the list. American Oasis wannabees. Starts off well but gets flabby in the second half. Points deducted for excessive wankage - no-one needs multiple 5 minute+ tracks.
p51. 1960. 3 stars. Fantastic voice, let down by dated production and a peculiar choice of material. Bonus point for the children's classic One More Dance.
p625. 1989. 2 stars. Overblown, sex obsessed,big haired cock rock with some decent tunes and NPC lyrics. Well done of its kind but definitely not essential.
Not in my edition of the book! 2000. 2 stars. Inoffensive and mostly forgettable collection of what sounds like Crowded House outtakes. Definitely not essential listening.
p396. 1978. 1 star. Unpleasant, pointless abstract noodling. Absolutely no reason for anyone to waste time on this. On the plus side, it's short.
p715. 1993. 1 star. Not her best work by any means. Raw, shouty girl rock with no tunes. She improved as she got older.
p407. 1978. 2 stars. Limp post punk, saved from one star by "Shot By Both Sides".
p302. 1973. 4 stars. The only hippies you can trust. Does meander a bit though.
Not in my edition of the book! 2020. 2 stars. Strong voice let down by a lack of standout tunes, and poor quality control - judicious editing on the length of most of the songs and unnecessary "extras" like dogs barking would have swung this to a 3. And when she realises that a song might contain more than one repeated verse, she could be quite good.
p908. 2006. 1 star. Hip-hop/rap with strings and brass sections. Well done of its kind, but wrong audience. Will not listen to it again.
p491. 1982. 3 stars. Quality 80s synth pop/rock with decent songs and vocalist. Point deducted for straying into wankage once too often - nobody need multiple 5 minute+ tracks.
p26. 1956. 3 stars. The primeval ancestor of Nick Cave's "Murder Ballads". Most C&W songs are about jail, cars, trains, a dog, your partner cheating on you, or drinking. The only thing missing from this album is a song about a man who breaks out of jail, steals a truck, drives over a railway line, hits his dog on his way home, finds his wife in bed with his brother AND his sister, and then goes to a bar to get shitfaced.
p852. 1999. 3 stars. Dated dad rock. A handful of great tracks on this, and on the plus side none of them outstay their welcome. There's a lot of filler though.
p472. 1981. 4 stars. The only Goth rock album you need. Have to be in the right mood for it though.
p910. 2006. 4 stars. Not her very best work - see "Frank" for that - but it's still brilliant work from one of the very best voices and songwriters of the early millennium. Point deducted for the intrusive production and the occasional filler.
p672. 1991. 4 stars. THE early 90s dance/trance/rave album. Still sounds wonderful today. The first half is faultless. Point deducted for excessive wankage ("No More Tears") on the 2nd half. For those of you who can't find it on Spotify: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjqb9_OEySY Kudos to Dimitris Dimakis for sharing :)
p91. 1966. 2 stars. Uninspiring Byrds and Monkees hybrid. Perfectly adequate without being the least bit essential.
p443. 1979. 3 stars. Before he went weird and starting re-organising his face, Michael Jackson was a bona fide contender for the future of disco and R&B. Some great tunes, great vocals, wonderful production. Points deducted for excessive filler on the second side. Probably just edges Thriller as his best work. Still a bit uneasy about giving 3 stars to a kiddy fiddler.
p795. 1996. 3 stars. Lightweight Northern Irish Oasis wannabees with some decent tunes, let down by excessive guitar wankage, filler and limp vocals.
p624. 1989. 3 stars. Strangely alluring soundtrack without a film. Echoes of film noir, British gangster films and Twin Peaks. Points deducted for outstaying its welcome. Not everyone's cup of tea, but I enjoyed it.
Not in my edition of the book! 2004. 2 stars. Well done but average band produces well done but average music. Why is this on the list?
p216. 1970. 2 stars. The source of an entire generation of 1970s male middle of the road singer/songwriters. There are a handful of standout songs (Sweet Baby James, Fire and Rain) and decent guitar picking, but it lacks any sense of excitement and there is a LOT of bland filler. On the plus side, it's short.
p310. 1973. 3 stars. Primeval roots of punk with vocal nods to Jim Morrison and Jagger before he became old and flabby. Short, sweet and on point. Points deducted for lack of standout tunes, ropey lyrics and letting themselves down with excessive wankage on the last track.
Not in my edition of the book! 1999. 1 star. If you eat an entire bag of fairground candyfloss, you might enjoy it at the beginning, but after a while your teeth start screaming and at the end you feel vaguely embarrassed with yourself for having eaten it all. Listening to this album, I enjoyed it at the beginning, but after a while my ears started bleeding and at the end I was vaguely embarrassed at having listened to an entire Britney Spears album.
p346. 1975. 3 stars. Bit of a mixed bag, this one - a lot of filler, and possibly his worst vocal performance ever on "Mellow My Mind." With better quality control this could easily have been a 4. Still worth a listen.
Not in my edition of the book! 2019. 3 stars. Not his best work. Powerful? Yes. Essential listening? No.
p498. 1982. 3 stars. Motorhead wannabees with an interest in demons, satanism and horror. Once you realise this is a Spinal Tap parody it's quite amusing. Prefer the Justin Bieber cover of "Don't Burn The Witch" though.
p898. 2004. 1.5 stars. Egotistical, misogynistic, foul mouthed crap. 20 years on and this already sounds dated. Bonus star for the classy horn section.
p929. 2010. 5 stars. Fabulous collection of songs covering desire, self loathing and broken relationships. Great voice, sharp lyrics and stripped down production. And the title track is possibly the greatest breakup song ever written.
p202. 1970. 5 stars. The only heavy metal album you need. Not a weak track on it, and it still sounds fresh today.
p482. 1981. 3 stars. Average early 80s disco/dance/rap. Well done of its kind, and excellent production, but not essential listening.
p242. 1971. 3 stars. Peculiar blend of pub rock, folk and 60s Brit blues. Doesn't always work, but when it does it's splendid. Points deducted for redundant covers, and lyrically it hasn't dated well.
p66. 1964. 4.5 stars. Loveable moptops set the gold standard for early Brit 60's pop. It's packed with classics and standards. Half a point deducted for the one filler ("When I Get Home"), but other than that it's home runs all the way.
Not in my edition of the book. 2007. 2 stars. Sounds like a Blur album. Great if you like Blur, which I don't. Well done but no standout tracks. Is it me or does Damon Albarn always sound like he has a bad sinus infection?
p486. 486. 4 stars. Not a fan of hip-hop/rap, but this hits a sweet spot. It's dated well, doesn't outstay its welcome and contains one stone cold classic in the title track. Point deducted for the worrying homoerotic "tribute" to Steve Wonder.
p871. 2001. 3 stars. C&W based REM wannabee. Lyrically sharp, but no standout tunes and the vocalist sounds like they just took Prozac. On the plus side, it doesn't outstay its welcome.
p468. 1980. 2 stars. Soulless Brit faux reggae that outstays its welcome. Far too smooth and saxophone laden, it has multiple +6 minutes tracks, redundant covers and direct pilfering (the verse melody of "Burden of Shame" is a direct steal of Van Morrison's "Moondance"). Saved from one star by the hit singles.
p474. 1981. 2 stars. Not a fan of live albums, although this one does manage to capture the raw energy of Motorhead on top form. Starts off with a classic and then goes downhill from there. Stick with the studio albums.
p816.1997. 4 stars Sounds a collection of quality discards from the 60s - Small Faces, Kinks, Stones. Still fresh nearly 20 years on.
p293. 1973. 1 star. 70s ambient jazz-rock with multiple 8+ minute tracks and a 19+ minute monstrosity to end with. Fuck no. Previous collaborations between Germany and Japan did not end well either.
Not in my edition of the book! 2020. 3 stars. Sounds like Lana Del Rey's younger cousin, even down to some of the vocal phrasing. Decent tunes, sharp lyrics, but it does seem over emotionally wrought and veers dangerously into teenage girl poetry at times.
p304. 1973. 4 stars. Now we're talking. Stevie's best album, packed with great tunes and sharp lyrics, and it doesn't outstay its welcome. 1 point docked for the dated synths and occasional lapse into 70s wankage on a couple of tracks.
Not in my edition of the book! 1994. 1 star. (C)Rap. Tedious, dated, misogynistic, obnoxious, foul-mouth rubbish. Give it another 50 years and people will wonder why anyone ever wanted to listen to it.
Not in my edition of the book! 1999. 4 stars. The cynical granddaughters of The Go-Gos. Great tunes, angry vocals, cynical lyrics. Point deducted for filler on the last couple of tracks.
p473. 1981. 3 stars. Prototype Bangles, but without the harmonies. Outside of the singles, there's a lot of filler. Credit for opening the door for every other girl band writing their own material that followed.
p512. 1983. 2 stars. Not their best work by any means - see "be Yourself Tonight", "Revenge" and "Savage" for that - and outside of the singles there's a lot of filler and half baked songs that outstay their welcome. Set against that, we've got excellent production and THAT voice.
p333. 1974. 4 stars. American satire at it's finest, with lyrics as sharp as a stiletto, and some great tunes. Guaranteed to cause offence. Strange that you can tune into any radio and hear rappers talk about n****s, but you'll never hear "Rednecks" played.
p437. 1979. 5 stars. How to grow old disgraceful. Fabulous and filthy lyrics, great tunes and production, and that voice sounds as lived in as a favourite cracked leather jacket.
Not in my edition of the book! 2000. 1 star. A double album of tedious 5 minute+ samples, rap and electronic beats. Fuck no. Why is this on the list?